what should i do?
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Hi everyone. I am now typing this with a very sad mood. I believe in every relation there tend to be quarrel. It made us grow. Sorry to say that i cant feel anything from my gf anymore. She claimed she still love me but i don feel that way. I love her and sorry for being selfish, i expect her to love me as well.
This new year , not a single call from her . very sad. for as long as 1 week, she can don bother to call how i been. Am the one that alway do that. Am really feeling tired the way she treated me. I do all things to made her happy but i guess she take me for granted.
My birthday not a single gift from her. I do not expected much but just showed some form of care to me . I always there for her but when i need her (feeling down) and called her, she said she tired.
My heart feel so sad and pain when she say that.
I had talk to her about all these and how i felt as i beleived thing will get better since we are all adult. But again and again... same thing happened. What i trying to say is that i don feel love from her anymore even though she still say she love me. Just went out with her and i never do any toking. Not even hold her hand. After back home, she sms me ask me what happened. when i called her, she was out having fun with her friends ( i think) . I felt so pain just to think that she is enjoying outside while her bf(me) is having such a hardtime.
Now am thinking of breaking up with her and moved on. But am afriad it wll be a rush decision and i will regret. But i do know there thing will keep poping out. and both of us get hurt.
So pals out there, pls give me some advise. thank you for the time. Happy NEw year too. -
emm.. poor dude.
try to talk with ur gf lo.
tell her how u feel. -
i am really feeling very down now. don feel like working tml.
guess cigerettes are my best pals now. -
i hope she is not playing those "silent break" game......
have a talk with her.......make things clear.......
if she is avoiding u........i guess u shd relli move on........ -
no, she not avoiding me. she said she will call me back but i just don wan to do any talking . too tired with all the talking which i had did last time.
i think that it.. -
agree...Originally posted by FireIce:i hope she is not playing those "silent break" game......
have a talk with her.......make things clear.......
if she is avoiding u........i guess u shd relli move on........ -
seriously hor.......u must see if it is worth it or not to move on....the time u invested up til now and the time u intend to invest on her somemore. personally when i dun feel like talking to her, means end of game for her n me. but to each his own. this type of thing u must let her noe abt it. seriously, she dun call u, dun give u bday present, no new yr greeting call, worst than my normal gal friends out there. she tell u she luv u so that u will stil be good to her bah, maybe she is waiting for some other guy to hook her up then let u go. it's hard to say and given the situation now(seems to me that u do not noe her life that well now, perhaps u can join her to enjoy sometimes with her frens and also get to noe them), for me i will talk to her and if goes badly, suggest a breakup due to your forementined reason and try to move on bah. if she also dun care abt the relationship, she'll also move on. if not, she might come for u. most girls will cherish the relationship if they really luv the guy, and given that she is in the wrong 1st, she'll probably come back but then also depends on her passivitiy.Originally posted by blowfish:Hi everyone. I am now typing this with a very sad mood. I believe in every relation there tend to be quarrel. It made us grow. Sorry to say that i cant feel anything from my gf anymore. She claimed she still love me but i don feel that way. I love her and sorry for being selfish, i expect her to love me as well.
This new year , not a single call from her . very sad. for as long as 1 week, she can don bother to call how i been. Am the one that alway do that. Am really feeling tired the way she treated me. I do all things to made her happy but i guess she take me for granted.
My birthday not a single gift from her. I do not expected much but just showed some form of care to me . I always there for her but when i need her (feeling down) and called her, she said she tired.
My heart feel so sad and pain when she say that.
I had talk to her about all these and how i felt as i beleived thing will get better since we are all adult. But again and again... same thing happened. What i trying to say is that i don feel love from her anymore even though she still say she love me. Just went out with her and i never do any toking. Not even hold her hand. After back home, she sms me ask me what happened. when i called her, she was out having fun with her friends ( i think) . I felt so pain just to think that she is enjoying outside while her bf(me) is having such a hardtime.
Now am thinking of breaking up with her and moved on. But am afriad it wll be a rush decision and i will regret. But i do know there thing will keep poping out. and both of us get hurt.
So pals out there, pls give me some advise. thank you for the time. Happy NEw year too. -
haiz.. single better la..
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time to do some shopping..
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if the girl is just moonlighting around and waiting for the next guy to replace you, forget it...she's just plain selfish.
it is wise to just talk again with her, no matter how briefly it is, before u mention the word 'break up' ...so at least ur questions will be answered...or at least reflected to her (even she doesnt want to answer u).
if there is already a clash of ideas /principles...and it is very hard to get it resolved...i suggest u move on. treat it as at least both of u were deeply in love before...and now truly wish each other happiness.
u cannot just weigh the pros n cons so long...what's going to be regretted will be so...you will find someone more worthy of u soon. -
contradicting. do u love her or not? if you don't (or love has died) then just end it. chang tong bu ru duan tong. but you u do love her, then try to talk to her why she treats you this way.Originally posted by blowfish:Sorry to say that i cant feel anything from my gf anymore. She claimed she still love me but i don feel that way. I love her and sorry for being selfish, i expect her to love me as well.
if she is willing to change and treat you better, good. if things are back to the way they were then ask yourself 2 questions:
1) do you want have such a relationship?
2) can you accept the fact this is the way she will be treating you for the rest of the time u guys are together?
it is hard to leave a person you love but sometimes that is the best for you and her. hope things turn out well for you.
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Originally posted by blowfish:Hi everyone. I am now typing this with a very sad mood. I believe in every relation there tend to be quarrel. It made us grow. Sorry to say that i cant feel anything from my gf anymore. She claimed she still love me but i don feel that way. I love her and sorry for being selfish, i expect her to love me as well.
This new year , not a single call from her . very sad. for as long as 1 week, she can don bother to call how i been. Am the one that alway do that. Am really feeling tired the way she treated me. I do all things to made her happy but i guess she take me for granted.
My birthday not a single gift from her. I do not expected much but just showed some form of care to me . I always there for her but when i need her (feeling down) and called her, she said she tired.
My heart feel so sad and pain when she say that.
I had talk to her about all these and how i felt as i beleived thing will get better since we are all adult. But again and again... same thing happened. What i trying to say is that i don feel love from her anymore even though she still say she love me. Just went out with her and i never do any toking. Not even hold her hand. After back home, she sms me ask me what happened. when i called her, she was out having fun with her friends ( i think) . I felt so pain just to think that she is enjoying outside while her bf(me) is having such a hardtime.
Now am thinking of breaking up with her and moved on. But am afriad it wll be a rush decision and i will regret. But i do know there thing will keep poping out. and both of us get hurt.
So pals out there, pls give me some advise. thank you for the time. Happy NEw year too.
From here, we can see that body language is more powerful than words itself. (Can say a thousand of I love you, yet when you show them sincerely, its like saying a thousand of them in one shot). Your expectation is natural - we are expect our love to love us in equal. (It is called the Great Balance) But generally in reality, this Great Balance is seldom applicable.
You are the silent suffering type - you are dis-satisfied yet you do not wish to pressure and or enlighten her on your part. Probably you had tried to do something, but to your disappointment, its not working, therefore you decide to keep mum until you explode, like now.
There is a fine line difference between foolish tolerence and tolerence. We should accept our partner's short-coming gracefully and improve one another. This tolerence is what we constantly work for. Foolish Tolerence is to remain silent when issues are affecting the relationship. Without proper communication over a vast period of time - where the damage is, it is difficult to see and repair them.
Please do not see love as a form of suffering (Astro mode: Possible Moon affliction with Saturn).
Thinking of breaking up yet unsure if it is the correct decision? Why not throw in a GENUINE chance for your relationship and adopt other ways of solving your crisis, if previous methods don't work. Of course, the main thing is to let her know what's wrong and see if she is willing to work together with you and bring the relationship into new heights - the so called Soul Talk Communication.
You want to make that break-up decision, however, if she wants to work for it, shouldn't you give her a chance to prove it as well? Of course, if she show half-heartedness, forget it.
P.S: The most important aspect in a relationship is when the other half willing to throw in genuine effort to make it work. All is possible with chance and the effort. I say, until after you gone through this phrase, before you can truly say 'I have no more regrets; I did what I can to save our relationship.'
Cheers -
i've think that Yunhaier has some very good advice.
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I think she cry when she know am suggesting a break up over the phone. I feel so sad. But i guess that not much i can do. I always always emphasised the importance of communication and she know that too. I feel like giving her a call and ask her out to talk over it. But i cant. i know if i do that, thing will get worse.
maybe should wait a few day then see how she doing, or just wait for her call? i feel like shit now.
no working and more cigerette for me. and yes i do love her. -
How come if u love her , ..... u can still be the one to suggest the break up ? and also how long already u in the relation?Originally posted by blowfish:I think she cry when she know am suggesting a break up over the phone. I feel so sad. But i guess that not much i can do. I always always emphasised the importance of communication and she know that too. I feel like giving her a call and ask her out to talk over it. But i cant. i know if i do that, thing will get worse.
maybe should wait a few day then see how she doing, or just wait for her call? i feel like shit now.
no working and more cigerette for me. and yes i do love her.
In actualy fact the same thing hap to me too.. the ger also claims to still love me but devotes all her time to all other areas like friends, and work instead of me.
This is bad lor.. but I feel that it gets boring for them too if they keep hanging around with the same guy..... time too has a part to play. in my opinion, if there is no change in a relation by then end of 3rd year, things becomes super sians and thats when the relation wil go wrong! -
actually there is a kind of connection called spiritual connection between a couple, i.e. for christians, it means they can communicate verbally as well as read each other's minds to a certain extent. well i'm a not a christian but happen to noe abt such a thing. u definitely need to talk over it as soon as possible. if not, it'll be a bad ending with her for u and as well as for her. she might not noe what actually u are thinking or feeling. u must let her noe if u do still have feelings for her. it's for her own good to move on also if all turns out to a breakup. it's for your own good too. trust me it's got to be done. i made this mistake of not doing it and wasted a lot of time trying to move on in the past. y would u think if u ask her out to talk over it, things will be worst??? unless u r a very temperamental person(just like me), but in such situations, u got to use your maturity and tell yourself to keep cool, keep calm and when if she really did cry, you won't even be angry bah.......Originally posted by blowfish:I think she cry when she know am suggesting a break up over the phone. I feel so sad. But i guess that not much i can do. I always always emphasised the importance of communication and she know that too. I feel like giving her a call and ask her out to talk over it. But i cant. i know if i do that, thing will get worse.
maybe should wait a few day then see how she doing, or just wait for her call? i feel like shit now.
no working and more cigerette for me. and yes i do love her. -
girls are passive creatures......the part of spicing up the relationship is on the guy's part bah. izzit possible to have honeymoon period all the way till marriage??? if u r creative enff, romantic enff, daring enff, willing n able to spend time/effort, i certainly think it is possible to do so. u also got to spread out the things that can add spice to the relationship. dun do it all like throughout the X'mas, NY, CNY, V-Day period. then the march to nov all sian sian liao loh. unless got each other Bday or Anniversary. as long as the girl luv the guy, every STUPID thing that the guy do becomes sweet or cute or romantic........well i'm can say it but can't do it though.....ahahahaOriginally posted by stoner:How come if u love her , ..... u can still be the one to suggest the break up ? and also how long already u in the relation?
In actualy fact the same thing hap to me too.. the ger also claims to still love me but devotes all her time to all other areas like friends, and work instead of me.
This is bad lor.. but I feel that it gets boring for them too if they keep hanging around with the same guy..... time too has a part to play. in my opinion, if there is no change in a relation by then end of 3rd year, things becomes super sians and thats when the relation wil go wrong! -
Wah ... your remarks really kills the BRAIN man !!Originally posted by Cerebral_Assassin:girls are passive creatures......the part of spicing up the relationship is on the guy's part bah. izzit possible to have honeymoon period all the way till marriage??? if u r creative enff, romantic enff, daring enff, willing n able to spend time/effort, i certainly think it is possible to do so. u also got to spread out the things that can add spice to the relationship. dun do it all like throughout the X'mas, NY, CNY, V-Day period. then the march to nov all sian sian liao loh. unless got each other Bday or Anniversary. as long as the girl luv the guy, every STUPID thing that the guy do becomes sweet or cute or romantic........well i'm can say it but can't do it though.....ahahaha but it is a very good attemp ! -
By doing nothing - what makes you think it will get any better?Originally posted by blowfish:I think she cry when she know am suggesting a break up over the phone. I feel so sad. But i guess that not much i can do. I always always emphasised the importance of communication and she know that too. I feel like giving her a call and ask her out to talk over it. But i cant. i know if i do that, thing will get worse.
maybe should wait a few day then see how she doing, or just wait for her call? i feel like shit now.
no working and more cigerette for me. and yes i do love her. -
u really have to talk to her.. don't let things drag.. if u think its time to break pls break don't drag.. draging a relationship is very tiring
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and very pain wan.. dun think u wanna hurt urself tt long rite?Originally posted by _attitude_:u really have to talk to her.. don't let things drag.. if u think its time to break pls break don't drag.. draging a relationship is very tiring -
although I am young in all this relation stuff and younger than everyone else but I also got my fair share of this thing also but we were good friends but once I told her that I like her,we almsot never talk in sch although she says she does like me but she never shows it even I give my attention to herOriginally posted by blowfish:This new year , not a single call from her . very sad. for as long as 1 week, she can don bother to call how i been. Am the one that alway do that. Am really feeling tired the way she treated me. I do all things to made her happy but i guess she take me for granted.
My birthday not a single gift from her. I do not expected much but just showed some form of care to me . I always there for her but when i need her (feeling down) and called her, she said she tired.
My heart feel so sad and pain when she say that.
I had talk to her about all these and how i felt as i beleived thing will get better since we are all adult. But again and again... same thing happened. What i trying to say is that i don feel love from her anymore even though she still say she love me. Just went out with her and i never do any toking. Not even hold her hand. After back home, she sms me ask me what happened. when i called her, she was out having fun with her friends ( i think) . I felt so pain just to think that she is enjoying outside while her bf(me) is having such a hardtime.
Now am thinking of breaking up with her and moved on. But am afriad it wll be a rush decision and i will regret. But i do know there thing will keep poping out. and both of us get hurt.
I think u should let go although it hurst,I know its hurts cause I am feeling it now
but u think of it...if u hang on,are both of u happy?people always say "it takes two hands to clap" ,u r the only hand waiting for another want to clap....are u sure it is worth holding on,its hurts even more if u hold on
thats my advice only hor,don't take it too seriously -
hi all, just call her and conclusion.. to work hard and overcome the obstacles ahead of us. Kind of strange but my heart still feel the pain...
Anyway i stronger now.
Thank for everyone here your kind advise.
And hope you all have good long loving companion and have my blessing. Bless me too.. -
Yes. Yun has done well for this one.Originally posted by s|nNeD:i've think that Yunhaier has some very good advice. -
gd luck to u! i'm sure u guys can overcome e obstacles!!Originally posted by blowfish:hi all, just call her and conclusion.. to work hard and overcome the obstacles ahead of us. Kind of strange but my heart still feel the pain...
Anyway i stronger now.
Thank for everyone here your kind advise.
And hope you all have good long loving companion and have my blessing. Bless me too..