Faithfulness...i still become single too..
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Its a bleeding irony to be living in a society where the girls look for faithful partners and when you are faithful like me..It doesnt turn out and you feel like whatever good you have done and any stray thoughts you have fought so hard to eradicate ends up in your own loneliness...Im damn sad and disappointed with this life.
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shame on her... chill pal...
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it's something else?
wat's her side of the story?
(if u are comfortable about saying it) -
Heh..As a friend..she is in my eyes one of the best I've got..Still, although I realised that Its better now than never, Im just unable to stomach the fact that I've sacrificed so much and tried to give her a perfect world to live in, being absolutely loyal and supportive in whatever she wants to do..These things have to happen..For those who will comment that Im being naive..Please don't. Im not naive, its just me to give my all and even more for a person that has stolen my heart....Is there no justice and appreciation for the trials that a person has to go through for you?Nice guys always finish last when girls want a fling and think they know who they wanna settle down with..yet when the shit hits the fan, they think back to the Nerd, the boring but dependable guy, the wacky and weird fella who's smart and faithful, the ambitious guy who is willing to give up his dreams of Berkeley for her....
Why can't so many gals appreciate the present and not seek so far? -
you are probably hitting on the wrong girl.
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Well, mebbe you are right..Haiz..I still love her although its already six months...
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then too bad.
they are certain guys meant for certain girls.
perhaps she is not meant for you. persistent also no use. -
You have my commiserations, LazerLordz. Unfortunately, faithfulness itself may not be enough to cut it sometimes. I'll give you an example from personal experience.
A few years ago, I started a relationship with a colleague with whom I'd been working for 4 years. We were welfare workers, running a house of kids who were wards of the state.
Anybody who's worked in welfare will tell you that it's one of the most demanding environments on a person. You see things you don't ever want to know exist, and whatever you do, there will be something or someone working against you. ItÂ’s almost as bad as war.
Anyway, after all this time, I figured that this colleague, who had stuck it out with me through thick and thin, would make a good life partner. Oops.
She's 11 years older than I am, and she had two almost-adult kids living with her at the time. Their father was an abusive SOB who at one point actually chased her around with a chainsaw, and she eventually had the wisdom to leave him. For 16 years after that, she was all they had by way of parents, because anybody else she had dated ignored the kids.
So along comes yours truly. Having been a colleague for 4 years and having visited the household during that time, I developed a great friendship with the kids as well, and at the start, it was great that my colleague finally had a partner who took her and the kids as a package.
The one thing we forgot to account for is that you never, EVER, come between a woman and her kids. Oops.
After a while, my partner felt that I was trying to take on the role of surrogate father, a role that she had held for 16 years. All I was doing was keeping things as normal as possible, relative to the time before we started the relationship. After 2 months, everything fell apart completely.
Some days, it's those things that come completely out of left field and hit you, and there isnÂ’t a damned thing you can do about it.
The bright side of it is that we stayed apart for 3 months, after which I called her to see how she was. Now, 4 years later, weÂ’re still the best of friends. In fact, the first time she met my current girlfriend, she interrogated her just to make sure that I was doing the right thing. Not very politically correct, of course, but from someone whoÂ’s been around the block a few times, it was the biggest sign of caring that she could have mustered.
Anyway, these days, I have a new partner whom IÂ’m absolutely in love with, plus a great friend to boot. However, 4 years ago, things seemed very dark indeed. The lessons I have learned from that point in time are:
1) You may never have all bases covered – learn to live with the fact
2) The worst thing you can do wrong is crawl into your hole and stay there
3) The next worst thing is to beat yourself up about it
4) Don’t EVER become bitter and twisted as a result of your experiences – the only person you hurt that way is yourself
5) You have no choice but to get back up off your duff, and get back into the game – it may not get better, but hell, the alternative can get worse
Give yourself time to get used to the fact of what has happened, then get on with life. All the best! -
The light at the end of the tunnel seems very bright..Sometimes I hope i will exit this gloomy pahse of life an d move on..Thanx man for the advice..
You wanna know more..http://selfrevolution.blogspot.com
My whole "book" of misery and joy.Feel free to read it. -
man ..dun give up..
that is the reason why i prefer to love than to be love...when we are loved..and u want to return a favor by loving back..u might be hit right hard!
some people just to fall in love bcos they want to be in love,not bcos they are in love...
just to get the kick i guess...
cheer up.. better things will come..
take it as..its a test in life..pass the test and move to the nxt stage! -
Ah, the Bard: "in love with love itself".Originally posted by lolsuck:some people just to fall in love bcos they want to be in love,not bcos they are in love... -
LazerLordz,
There're pple who take longer to settle down & fig out wat they wan. They might sez now, tt they wan a faithful guy, without thot as to whether they themselves can commit to a r'ship.
Sometimes time plays a part, an indiv may need time to mature & think over thgs or experience heartbreaks in order to noe wat they truly wan in life & love : )
None of us is perfect, it's thru mistakes tt we learn.
RPOriginally posted by LazerLordz:Its a bleeding irony to be living in a society where the girls look for faithful partners and when you are faithful like me..It doesnt turn out and you feel like whatever good you have done and any stray thoughts you have fought so hard to eradicate ends up in your own loneliness...Im damn sad and disappointed with this life. -
In the first place, what makes you think that the quality 'faithfulness' is able to make your relationship last?Originally posted by LazerLordz:Its a bleeding irony to be living in a society where the girls look for faithful partners and when you are faithful like me..It doesnt turn out and you feel like whatever good you have done and any stray thoughts you have fought so hard to eradicate ends up in your own loneliness...Im damn sad and disappointed with this life.
It is a virtue and the essential duty of a serious relationship from both side, but it cannot substain the country for you. Its like a powerful shield though, to ward off invaders. But the destruction of a country, doesn't only mean that someone attacked them and kill the whole city right?
A country can be 'killed' or render severely impaired by others means.
Cheers -
Originally posted by LazerLordz:Heh..As a friend..she is in my eyes one of the best I've got..Still, although I realised that Its better now than never, Im just unable to stomach the fact that I've sacrificed so much and tried to give her a perfect world to live in, being absolutely loyal and supportive in whatever she wants to do..These things have to happen..For those who will comment that Im being naive..Please don't. Im not naive, its just me to give my all and even more for a person that has stolen my heart....Is there no justice and appreciation for the trials that a person has to go through for you?Nice guys always finish last when girls want a fling and think they know who they wanna settle down with..yet when the shit hits the fan, they think back to the Nerd, the boring but dependable guy, the wacky and weird fella who's smart and faithful, the ambitious guy who is willing to give up his dreams of Berkeley for her....
Why can't so many gals appreciate the present and not seek so far?
You did what you ought to do and never lose this virtue to circumstances. www had mentioned, you probably fall for the wrong person - well, although no person is wrong to be in love with, but its link with the first law of love: its we who choses our partner and not the other way around, is there.
Why can't so many gals appreciate the present and not seek so far? - Why not you chose to fall for the 'right' girl than to seek for one that would not give you the kind of faithfulness, maturity and level you desire? Probably you may argue back - that's not important. The note I wanna bring out is that every relationship has its own reason for existance. To degenerate ourselves due to relationship is to fail our cosmic lesson. To uphold them and move steadily into the future is a victory scored.
Cheers -
Were you even in a relationship with her in the 1st place?Originally posted by LazerLordz:Its a bleeding irony to be living in a society where the girls look for faithful partners and when you are faithful like me..It doesnt turn out and you feel like whatever good you have done and any stray thoughts you have fought so hard to eradicate ends up in your own loneliness...Im damn sad and disappointed with this life. -
yeah, i assume that you are interested in her and had put in all effort to please her, but she didn't return in kind?
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Sometimes, we all have to come to accept the fact that good input doesn't always process into our desired outcome(s). I'm sure we've all heard cases of an awesome girl who does everything in her power to appease an unappreciative guy, who doesn't even have good qualities to begin with.
Bottom-line: Life's never fair.
It's a pity that some of us poor folks have to learn things the hard way. -
life is juz like dat nw...i'd had learn to take such things as easy as possible...Originally posted by LazerLordz:Its a bleeding irony to be living in a society where the girls look for faithful partners and when you are faithful like me..It doesnt turn out and you feel like whatever good you have done and any stray thoughts you have fought so hard to eradicate ends up in your own loneliness...Im damn sad and disappointed with this life.