Originally posted by yilang_hq:
suddenly just feel like saying out some things that have been keeped in my heart for so long...like many of the guys...around...
i have dreams...have wishes...of getting a girl i like to be my galfriend..learn to care for her...learn to liver together..learn to stay forever...when i was young..as in sec schs...i always think that...there will surely be girls that will be holding a torch for me..
haha..i think last time i really think too highly..of my self....
and i like a girl last time..for around 2 and 1/2 years...
but with totally no progress..saw her changing boyfriends...from handsome ah beng to rich boy...saw her changed from a pure and cute girl to a mature person....what i did during those times...was not like other guys..i think that other guys if they like a girl..they will ask her out..try to chat with her...care for her...but i did none of these...i just look at her...everytime look..at her...neber dare to find a chance to talk to her....thinking that like drama like that...some so called fate or whatever stuff will land us together and in the end...after sec sch....lost contact..
then i worked part time in some office job...
this time...i started to be more out-going...i decided to like a girl..who i really think that she will not be so choosing about a boyfriend..since she herself..was not pretty..talked a lot with her...teased her and even tried to meet her out...but in the end she still liked someone else...and i feel really hurt...i knew that i was an ordinary guy...with no special qualities...
my ht and wt ...1.72cm and 65kg at that time...and my whole appearance..i already think...that i still look quite ok...but why can't i have a girlfriend...
then now...at this stage of my life...
ns life...posted to place(cannot tell) to be on course...
i liked another girl...
she older than me, taller than me...looks pretty....and give me the look of an career woman type...i took the same approach...as last time during sec sch...looking at her from afar...
hoping again that some so called fate will bring us together...
then during day before yesterday...saw her boyfriend..picking her up...by car...i felt so hurt but i still joke around with my friends...like i dun really care...
2 weeks more and i will be posted out and i most probably will neber see her again...i knew that...i have gif up this chance again...
one reason i tell so much...is to tell the guys out there..if you really liked someone...u must take action...dun care about what losing face...if she reject u in the end...at least u try...with no regrets..if succeed...u lived with a girl u like a lifetime..
another reason..is to reflect on myself...how can i be so cowardly as to taking action to woo a girl..
suddenly...have this thinking...how many people actually married the girl that they really liked???
suddenly...feel so inferior...
suddenly feel so remorseful..why can't i take the initiative..to ask her out...
suddenly realise that i have past history of galfriend at the age of 20
suddenly feel like..maybe i gonna be a loner this life
suddenly feel like i gonna be a guy with no guts all my life..
it a happy valentine for most of the couple..out there..but it just gonna be another day for me
Guys - please learn to understand that its takes more than just looks, figure to have a decent girl. (In fact, man of the olden days never depend on such qualities to get woman. For those who depend on themselves to woo the fine ladies, its always the 'elements that cannot be seen' that actually scores. Money, fame, status, etc.) Your attitude towards love forms a major part of the reason why you never succeed.

You think that waiting for fate to arrive is best way for the chase because if you are fated, you both will see each other, talk to each other, meet each other, etc. THIS IS SO WRONG. In fact, you are inferior, passive and lack initiative.
Opportunity is there for you to further worked upon but you chose to wait for opportunity to feed you like a baby. You want that to happen? Simple. Wait until one fine day a girl falls for you and return that love and I guarantee you that usually this girl wouldn't be the kind of girl you would like. (Unless neptune/sun aspect triggers Love-at-first-sight aspect, karmic, Saturn/pluto aspects, Higher Twin Self theory or simply Art of seduction).
what i did during those times...was not like other guys..i think that other guys if they like a girl..they will ask her out..try to chat with her...care for her...but i did none of these...i just look at her...everytime look..at her...neber dare to find a chance to talk to her....thinking that like drama like that

You want your love to be like drama - reflects upon your weak emotionally needs. You crave not for a relationship - but for dramatic BGR love to norish you. And you feel you are 'indifferent' because you will NOT advance towards getting to know the girl better and you think that is helping you at all?
Decided to like a girl..who i really think that she will not be so choosing about a boyfriend..since she herself..was not pretty..
You can't have your dramatic love, you employ sense of logics and input into the dynamic of relationship - thinking that it would be easier to get her or everything. And what's with the word 'Decide'? So your needs has now transformed into a desire? Something that you can trigger or release?
Then later came an older woman. You returned back to your usual tactics of admiring from afar.
Do you realise why you have been doing that for only the secondary school girl and her? Because they seemed such a distance to obtain and your hidden gnawing inferiority dare not put up any reality challenge. Your sense of logics comes in and conjunct with your inferior - made you afraid of getting hurt, therefore you minimize your chances of injury, unknown to you that it also reduce your chance to succeed.

Your idea of love has now degenerate to a desperate mode of having a girlfriend. You look back in your life and felt empty because you have zero-relationship experience. Sure emotionally, you are, but that isn't something you can force and make it happen overnight.

P.S: Don't decide to fall in love, you fall when you will. Work for your opportunity. Fear to get hurt, don't chase. Rejection is painful, but at least you can smile and tell yourself you already did what you could and move on instead of lingering in wondering-thoughts if you could get her if you did something in the past.
Cheers