help guys.. n gals
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MY 1ST POST..... but how do u noe if a girl is treating u like a substitude?? any examples?? i hav a feeling dis girl i like is treating me like a substitude but i dunno how to confirm...help guys...thanks..
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If you feel it that way, probably it really is.
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its like... got 1 time... she say she calling me the next day.. i was like ok.. den she called... den after tt we sms i told her u busy no nid to call me.. den she say.."no la i remember i got to call u..." ..the 2 words "got to" vv contradicting loo..i mean wanna call call dun wan its ok ma.. make it as though i like her "to do" list..haiz
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First of all it's substitute.Originally posted by ev3ryt|me:MY 1ST POST..... but how do u noe if a girl is treating u like a substitude?? any examples?? i hav a feeling dis girl i like is treating me like a substitude but i dunno how to confirm...help guys...thanks..
Most girls treat men like substitutes (even if they have only one boyfriend, at least recent study shows). In fact, you shouldn't be amazed if she was dating other guys while going steady with you. They tend to be spoilt for choices if they are given too much attention. (same applies to guys, in fact guys who are too spoilt for choices are most likely going to end up jerks!)
Are you her boyfriend? Have she introduced you to her friends?
If the answer is yes and no, it shows that she wants to have choices then sorry, but you're likely to end up as a substitute.
If you're not her boyfriend, at least she didn't acknowledge that you're her only one, and you're dating her, you are definitely a substitute if she calls you out when she's bored and ignore you most of the time.
Most women (note: not girls) are better at masking so you have to ask yourself the same question whether she treats you seriously or not. If she doesn't, you're definitely a substitute or a part-time entertainer.
The easiest way to do a check on the cases above is look at the mirror and ask yourself this question: "Are you more desirable to the opposite sex than her?" If the answer is no, the chances of being a substitute is higher. -
It's better she keeps reminding herself of you instead of others.Originally posted by ev3ryt|me:its like... got 1 time... she say she calling me the next day.. i was like ok.. den she called... den after tt we sms i told her u busy no nid to call me.. den she say.."no la i remember i got to call u..." ..the 2 words "got to" vv contradicting loo..i mean wanna call call dun wan its ok ma.. make it as though i like her "to do" list..haiz
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It's better she keeps reminding herself of you instead of others.Originally posted by ev3ryt|me:its like... got 1 time... she say she calling me the next day.. i was like ok.. den she called... den after tt we sms i told her u busy no nid to call me.. den she say.."no la i remember i got to call u..." ..the 2 words "got to" vv contradicting loo..i mean wanna call call dun wan its ok ma.. make it as though i like her "to do" list..haiz -
huh?? explain?? but... i mean... for me i believe... if u wan to call den call lo... dun wan dun need to force or purposely remember that need to call me jus becoz she promised the day be4 ma... abit strange lo i tink... den like... evryting is i do for her... though i dun expect anything in return but she really give nth in return though she says she like me alot... *blur*Originally posted by Nelstar:It's better she keeps reminding herself of you instead of others. -
substitute... no good lah... tell her lor
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how to kai kou?? how to put it in the nicest way so tt she doesn tink i am doubting her?Originally posted by sgboy2004:substitute... no good lah... tell her lor -
dun be afraid of asking, i think she is more afraid to be asked... probably she has been praying hard that u would not think that way.. so ask her! and u would probably get some lame reasons...Originally posted by ev3ryt|me:how to kai kou?? how to put it in the nicest way so tt she doesn tink i am doubting her?
do u love her? i guess she's not the one for u, cuz if she has feelings for u, she would have treat u better. and if she doesnt have special feelings for u in the first place, things would neva get better.. i guess she knows what she wants.. -
huh? i think u are too sensitive liao.. i dun find anything wrong in that sentence... i am a cancer, are u a cancer? cancerians are the most sensitive creatures on earth, but i dun find tat sentence wrong...Originally posted by ev3ryt|me:its like... got 1 time... she say she calling me the next day.. i was like ok.. den she called... den after tt we sms i told her u busy no nid to call me.. den she say.."no la i remember i got to call u..." ..the 2 words "got to" vv contradicting loo..i mean wanna call call dun wan its ok ma.. make it as though i like her "to do" list..haiz
think abt it this way.. at least watever u said, means alot to her... since she promised u, and she did it for u shows that ur words are impt to her... wat if she promised to call u, and in the end she nvr call? this shows that watever u said, she dun put it in her mind...
u see, even when she is busy she still rem to call u, isnt that gd?
dun tink too much, wat i have said might or might not be correct but if u have doubts, why not talk to her? -
But how to ask?? letter? sms? call? she seldom calls... more to sms... but sumtimes feel like it call me... if not dun.. or if not "remember"...which way?Originally posted by JazzyJas:dun be afraid of asking, i think she is more afraid to be asked... probably she has been praying hard that u would not think that way.. so ask her! and u would probably get some lame reasons...
do u love her? i guess she's not the one for u, cuz if she has feelings for u, she would have treat u better. and if she doesnt have special feelings for u in the first place, things would neva get better.. i guess she knows what she wants.. -
its true... but not becoz she busy...coz her frens ard her tt time busy... den she remember she gotta call me....i vv confuse leh.. feel like asking but dunno howOriginally posted by shifeng:huh? i think u are too sensitive liao.. i dun find anything wrong in that sentence... i am a cancer, are u a cancer? cancerians are the most sensitive creatures on earth, but i dun find tat sentence wrong...
think abt it this way.. at least watever u said, means alot to her... since she promised u, and she did it for u shows that ur words are impt to her... wat if she promised to call u, and in the end she nvr call? this shows that watever u said, she dun put it in her mind...
u see, even when she is busy she still rem to call u, isnt that gd?
dun tink too much, wat i have said might or might not be correct but if u have doubts, why not talk to her? -
I think you need to go up to her and directly ask "what am i to u? Your friend? Your close friend? Your good friend? or someone u have a crush on?"Originally posted by ev3ryt|me:its true... but not becoz she busy...coz her frens ard her tt time busy... den she remember she gotta call me....i vv confuse leh.. feel like asking but dunno how
She will have problems replying you.. unless she got her 'script' ready.
In the meantime, just play along with her.. Can see that she's not serious. I supposed she's only in secondary school? Age plays a part in this kinda thing... -
well, keep this friendship and let nature takes its course.. dun worry too much.. the way she expressed might mean something to u but she might be juz trying to make an effort to do what she promised.. whether both of u are meant to be together, so be it.. dun think too hard.. u would hurt urself in the end and she would not know what u have been thru... u noe...Originally posted by ev3ryt|me:its true... but not becoz she busy...coz her frens ard her tt time busy... den she remember she gotta call me....i vv confuse leh.. feel like asking but dunno how
smiLe
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U ask how to kai kou right?
like tt lo
"eh, (name), you know, i was beginning to wonder if u r actually treating me as a sub, you know, if you don't like me just tell me lor, i'm not a kid, stop treating me like one."
nth wrong wif tt wad .. and i also cancer ^^
yes i veri sensative one... -
eh...hmm...confused...wat exactly i shld n shld not do?
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i think u should relax, and don't care too much, you are having fun with her when you guys go out right? if she is not serious, than don't be serious too, if she just want fun, than have fun together.
my 2 cents lar.. nothing right or wrong. -
she sounds serious on the phone or sms... but i dunno how to see if she is serious... mayb i shld relax..Originally posted by gaoyue:i think u should relax, and don't care too much, you are having fun with her when you guys go out right? if she is not serious, than don't be serious too, if she just want fun, than have fun together.
my 2 cents lar.. nothing right or wrong. -
Hmm... A little strange that you're mentioning 'substitute' here? What's her current status in relationship? Attached?Originally posted by ev3ryt|me:huh?? explain?? but... i mean... for me i believe... if u wan to call den call lo... dun wan dun need to force or purposely remember that need to call me jus becoz she promised the day be4 ma... abit strange lo i tink... den like... evryting is i do for her... though i dun expect anything in return but she really give nth in return though she says she like me alot... *blur*
Personally, I feel that she probably have mixed feelings about you... Meaning some things she like about you, some things which she don't... Uncertainty...? It also hints infatuation from her side (though not necessarily so)....
Regards. -
Don't quite agree...Originally posted by Nelstar:First of all it's substitute.
Most girls treat men like substitutes (even if they have only one boyfriend, at least recent study shows). In fact, you shouldn't be amazed if she was dating other guys while going steady with you. They tend to be spoilt for choices if they are given too much attention. (same applies to guys, in fact guys who are too spoilt for choices are most likely going to end up jerks!) -
An idle mind is the devilÂ’s workshop. Ur reading too much into every of her word and action. Learn to let go. But if u can't help it, clarify every doubt with her instead of letting these negative thoughts breed in ur mind.Originally posted by ev3ryt|me:its like... got 1 time... she say she calling me the next day.. i was like ok.. den she called... den after tt we sms i told her u busy no nid to call me.. den she say.."no la i remember i got to call u..." ..the 2 words "got to" vv contradicting loo..i mean wanna call call dun wan its ok ma.. make it as though i like her "to do" list..haiz