Just a thought...
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Jus a casual ponder that came to mind..
The forum is filled with ppl who have unsatisfying relationships in real life... Eg being neglected or hurt by a close friend or GF/BF. They post their problems, & a meaningful no. of ppl'll come forward to offer advices, consolations etc..
if ppl can so helpful & sensitive to a "stranger" in the forum, what's more to the ppl in their real life.
If ppl could be more sensitive to the feelins of ppl ard them, there wouldn't even be a need for such Aunt Agony forum rite.... but it's jus a thought.. -
Of course such thoughts are partly feulled by personnal experiences...
It happened when i going thru a particularly bad period with my ex.. not only she had veri little time for me, but whenever she's with me, she chats away on the phone for a long time...
I know this smacks of narcissism... but i always wonder why can't she appreciate the person right beside her.
The funny thing is when she's with her frens, she likes to call me.. jus 2 chat
Mayb i am old sch in my thinkin, but i'd prefer to keep whatever calls or internet connectivity low whenever i am with someone i care for..
I mean, why the HELL do we need to be or feel connected to everyone all the time.
I be most willing to devote all my time & attention to whoever is here with me. -
*clap clap clap* Agree! But in real life, people are not as willing to share their stories nor others appear to be interested in them.. so, its quite a vicious cycle for all of us. Especially when you know the person, you dare not say certain things.
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Quite true.. i am here also because the ppl in my life dun rely care abt meOriginally posted by gaoyue:*clap clap clap* Agree! But in real life, people are not as willing to share their stories nor others appear to be interested in them.. so, its quite a vicious cycle for all of us. Especially when you know the person, you dare not say certain things. -
Hmm...well, thought that no one will think of this. Okie...I tell you what I think.
Because in real life, people who normally come to you with their problems are people you know or see everyday or your close friends or just friend.
The problem lies here...once they figured that you can help them with heaps of their personal problems, they depend heavily on you. so how much of other people's burden you think you can carry with you?
For me, I don't mind helping good friends as long as I have time and the mood to do so. I also need to live my own life and have my own time, and I also need to handle my own emotions on my bad days as well. Unless the person is somebody I really really really like, for example...my best friend. Then I will be there for that person 24/7.
Otherwise, this forum is good in a way you can come in and offer advice whenever you are feel like it. No obligations required.
Maybe it is just me...but that's how I function.
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Not to mention the forum offers the added benefits of anonymity & irresponsibiltyOriginally posted by parn:Hmm...well, thought that no one will think of this. Okie...I tell you what I think.
Because in real life, people who normally come to you with their problems are people you know or see everyday or your close friends or just friend.
The problem lies here...once they figured that you can help them with heaps of their personal problems, they depend heavily on you. so how much of other people's burden you think you can carry with you?
For me, I don't mind helping good friends as long as I have time and the mood to do so. I also need to live my own life and have my own time, and I also need to handle my own emotions on my bad days as well. Unless the person is somebody I really really really like, for example...my best friend. Then I will be there for that person 24/7.
Otherwise, this forum is good in a way you can come in and offer advice whenever you are feel like it. No obligations required.
Maybe it is just me...but that's how I function. -
Hahaha...i didn't say that hor...Originally posted by Infernal Affairs:Not to mention the forum offers the added benefits of anonymity & irresponsibilty -
some ppl jus wanna let it all out.......makes them feel better to have the rock off the chest.....
and who knows....there might be a good advice out there to help them solve their problems...... -
Originally posted by Infernal Affairs:Jus a casual ponder that came to mind.. The forum is filled with ppl who have unsatisfying relationships in real life... Eg being neglected or hurt by a close friend or GF/BF. They post their problems, & a meaningful no. of ppl'll come forward to offer advices, consolations etc.. if ppl can so helpful & sensitive to a "stranger" in the forum, what's more to the ppl in their real life.
If ppl could be more sensitive to the feelins of ppl ard them, there wouldn't even be a need for such Aunt Agony forum rite.... but it's jus a thought.. Virtual or non-virtual - I often talk about relationship and love, to almost anyone whenever such topics surface - I can get really carried away.
You trust me; in real life, words there are still nothing more than words here. People wouldn't see through what you want them to see from our experience because they have different lessons from us. Aunt Agony is needed because when people are desperate and helpless and there isn't any other channel to go - they pop here.
P.S: When you are strong, you have to help others to pick up along the way. Only then, you can shape your own karma and reduce cosmic lesson.
Cheers -
I think yr gf got the... 'I must talk on the phone' and 'I always miss those that are not around me' symdromeOriginally posted by Infernal Affairs:Of course such thoughts are partly feulled by personnal experiences...
It happened when i going thru a particularly bad period with my ex.. not only she had veri little time for me, but whenever she's with me, she chats away on the phone for a long time...
I know this smacks of narcissism... but i always wonder why can't she appreciate the person right beside her.
The funny thing is when she's with her frens, she likes to call me.. jus 2 chat
Mayb i am old sch in my thinkin, but i'd prefer to keep whatever calls or internet connectivity low whenever i am with someone i care for..
I mean, why the HELL do we need to be or feel connected to everyone all the time.
I be most willing to devote all my time & attention to whoever is here with me. -
Fundamental problem in your suggestion, It's quite unlikely that people can be 'sensitive' 24 hours around the clock... And plus the fact that it's a 'balance'... If you're sensitive to one thing, you probably won't be sensitive to another...Originally posted by Infernal Affairs:Jus a casual ponder that came to mind.. if ppl can so helpful & sensitive to a "stranger" in the forum, what's more to the ppl in their real life.
If ppl could be more sensitive to the feelins of ppl ard them, there wouldn't even be a need for such Aunt Agony forum rite.... but it's jus a thought..
Aunt Agony is useful as a source of help because... Other than the points already mentioned by our fellow forumites,
1. This is a good avenue for posting of problem. It's quite unlikely that you should be going around repeating your problem to people you meet or come across...
2. This is a good place for discussion. Everybody can contribute their parts, and it's up to the individual to pick up whatever he / she thinks is relevant and of usefulness.
3. This is a place where we can learn from the experience of each other....