thinkin too much?
-
A few months back, manage to catch up wif a long lost friend bout 6 yrs ago. Initially, its just simple chat n stuffs till we started to have more confiding talks. Well, if anyone has seen blueprints "chase", me story is somewhat similar to that, cept for e ending only. She n I has seen this drama and recently got a message that "well, who knws, mayb blueprint wuld happen in real life"
We enjoyed each others company as we lend each other a ear to listen. We sort of also express that, why both us din take e initiative back then (we were never a pair) and that I told her, I miss me chance, din buck up and some miscom..cox I "tot" she's attached.. of which e true is, she's not back then..
She and I share the same phrase of chating which I find is not easy... and shares some same hobbies too. Often we had witty chat but not till very recent I had a stunner question..:"what wuld happen if we get 2gether back then". shes curious to knw n wanted to ask on our last meetup, but paiseh. What prompt her to ask? I asked her back "if given another chance to be together, would u take the chance?" tis her reply "things r complicated and it involves not only 2 of usbut rather 4 ppl.."
cox both of us are attached n there's bit of probs here n there... so we confide wif each other.. sigh.. and finally, she asked me this "well, if the situation is tt we r single, would u take the chance?" I said yes... but then didn manage to ask her back...
what prompt her to ask tis question? purely curious or? I also wanted to ask too but, she beat me to it first... -
Why worry so much about it? You got nothing to lose anyway. The question is, are you serious about her? Do you feel love for her or you just have a crush on her. Make up your mind and once you have decided, at least you will know which path you are heading. Never take her for granted and imagined that she would be an easy target to be your potential gf.
She is probably as curious as you are...but it doesn't means anything. It doesn't means that she like you.
If you really love her, go ahead and love her with all your heart. If she responds, then you know that you are being appreciated. If she doesn't, you should feel happy that you did what you had to do to love her. Either way, you are a winner. Take care of her emotions and she will definitely responds to you if she doesn't dislike you.
Good luck. -
Originally posted by dirge:A few months back, manage to catch up wif a long lost friend bout 6 yrs ago. Initially, its just simple chat n stuffs till we started to have more confiding talks. Well, if anyone has seen blueprints "chase", me story is somewhat similar to that, cept for e ending only. She n I has seen this drama and recently got a message that "well, who knws, mayb blueprint wuld happen in real life"
We enjoyed each others company as we lend each other a ear to listen. We sort of also express that, why both us din take e initiative back then (we were never a pair) and that I told her, I miss me chance, din buck up and some miscom..cox I "tot" she's attached.. of which e true is, she's not back then..
She and I share the same phrase of chating which I find is not easy... and shares some same hobbies too. Often we had witty chat but not till very recent I had a stunner question..:"what wuld happen if we get 2gether back then". shes curious to knw n wanted to ask on our last meetup, but paiseh. What prompt her to ask? I asked her back "if given another chance to be together, would u take the chance?" tis her reply "things r complicated and it involves not only 2 of usbut rather 4 ppl.."
cox both of us are attached n there's bit of probs here n there... so we confide wif each other.. sigh.. and finally, she asked me this "well, if the situation is tt we r single, would u take the chance?" I said yes... but then didn manage to ask her back...
what prompt her to ask tis question? purely curious or? I also wanted to ask too but, she beat me to it first...
Yunhaier place three boxes on the table.
'Chose one of the box and that shall be your present.'
You pick one and open it.
It was a toy you loved much.
You played with the toy and never regreted your decision.
However, you begin to wonder what's in the other two boxes.
Will it be as enjoyable as the toy you picked? Will be more expensive? Or what if there is nothing inside?
***
P.S: We questioned about our possible future when in fact there is no way we could turn back, retrace our route and choose other option; we can only begin anew and create a new ending. And yes - you are thinking too much. (Apart from the fact that she has decent impression and ideas about you)
Cheers -
in response to parn:
Well, like e sentence sugest "it involves not only 2 of usbut rather 4 ppl.."
" so, I can't say I got nothin to lose.. both of us might hav alot to lose or maybe not.. every choice we make might be it good or bad... so, it's pretty hard sometimes.
in response to yun:
Well, we can't reallie turn back time, and its certain that risk involve is great if I decided to open up another box.. esp when both of us hav own relationship tat is >3yrs..
Probably I've been thinking is, this is something I've give it a miss, sort of a regret, and that e feeling is not good esp when I know that its a miscom n misintrepet from my side... a mistake sort of.
So its either I start anew or totally just forget about it and just be friends.
But then sometimes, me friends wuld just say that, guy n gal can't be friends one...sesh... I don think thats true.
How bout views from ladies? Its just a simple question thats all right? But then, I don't view it as simple as that... I feel theres something more to it..
but I just fear of asking too much and the tables flip out at me. -
I think the two have given you quite GOOD VIEWS...Originally posted by dirge:in response to parn:
Well, like e sentence sugest "it involves not only 2 of usbut rather 4 ppl.."
" so, I can't say I got nothin to lose.. both of us might hav alot to lose or maybe not.. every choice we make might be it good or bad... so, it's pretty hard sometimes.
in response to yun:
Well, we can't reallie turn back time, and its certain that risk involve is great if I decided to open up another box.. esp when both of us hav own relationship tat is >3yrs..
Probably I've been thinking is, this is something I've give it a miss, sort of a regret, and that e feeling is not good esp when I know that its a miscom n misintrepet from my side... a mistake sort of.
So its either I start anew or totally just forget about it and just be friends.
But then sometimes, me friends wuld just say that, guy n gal can't be friends one...sesh... I don think thats true.
How bout views from ladies? Its just a simple question thats all right? But then, I don't view it as simple as that... I feel theres something more to it..
but I just fear of asking too much and the tables flip out at me.
But I think you don't quite understand them
-
Very analytical viewOriginally posted by Yunhaier: Yunhaier place three boxes on the table.
'Chose one of the box and that shall be your present.'
You pick one and open it.
It was a toy you loved much.
You played with the toy and never regreted your decision.
However, you begin to wonder what's in the other two boxes.
Will it be as enjoyable as the toy you picked? Will be more expensive? Or what if there is nothing inside?
***
P.S: We questioned about our possible future when in fact there is no way we could turn back, retrace our route and choose other option; we can only begin anew and create a new ending. And yes - you are thinking too much. (Apart from the fact that she has decent impression and ideas about you)
Cheers
Got me thinking a lot.
I don't think you are thinking too much. But try not to rush into it. You mentioned she has her attachments and so do you. The best thing you should do is maintain this status quo and maybe one day when there really is nothing to hold you 2 back and you both realise you 2 are suited for each other, that will be the start of a good relationship(I think
) Nothing is good if you rush into it. Things that last usually take a long time to nurture. Imo just take it slow and easy and build it on a solid base. Then you can have your tower higher than Taipei 101
Just my few cents worth
-
mmm, its just that, instead of this being ask from a guy, now its asked from a ger...
wonder will this affect out friendship?
We just hit off very easily when we first met, probably due to too many things to catch up. But as we meet often, I find that its a very natural feeling like we known each other for very long (very long but never meet up) =P
well, e questions she her curiosity grows as we meet up often when we enjoyed alot (well she sms me)Now, when she's not online, it seems weird.
For me, its better to be friends coz usually, this type of thing express liao, e contacts is getting lesser n lesser as days goes by...sesh...hopefully it won't turn out tat way.
To Devil1976,
Hehe, actually, quite chim to understand, so, can simplify n elaborate how u derive their statments? thanx...
though I tell her its alright cox she told me hope its not bothering me, but e fact is, it is, and occupys me mind now n then till I realie get to talk to her personally... =) -
So how old are the both of you now?Originally posted by dirge:mmm, its just that, instead of this being ask from a guy, now its asked from a ger...
wonder will this affect out friendship?
We just hit off very easily when we first met, probably due to too many things to catch up. But as we meet often, I find that its a very natural feeling like we known each other for very long (very long but never meet up) =P
well, e questions she her curiosity grows as we meet up often when we enjoyed alot (well she sms me)Now, when she's not online, it seems weird.
For me, its better to be friends coz usually, this type of thing express liao, e contacts is getting lesser n lesser as days goes by...sesh...hopefully it won't turn out tat way.
To Devil1976,
Hehe, actually, quite chim to understand, so, can simplify n elaborate how u derive their statments? thanx...
though I tell her its alright cox she told me hope its not bothering me, but e fact is, it is, and occupys me mind now n then till I realie get to talk to her personally... =)
How long are both your current relationships?
What you make of this girl...? What you make of your current gf? -
Not sure that's it but this is my interpretation as of my best comprehension?Originally posted by parn:Why worry so much about it? You got nothing to lose anyway. The question is, are you serious about her? Do you feel love for her or you just have a crush on her. Make up your mind and once you have decided, at least you will know which path you are heading. Never take her for granted and imagined that she would be an easy target to be your potential gf.
She is probably as curious as you are...but it doesn't means anything. It doesn't means that she like you.
If you really love her, go ahead and love her with all your heart. If she responds, then you know that you are being appreciated. If she doesn't, you should feel happy that you did what you had to do to love her. Either way, you are a winner. Take care of her emotions and she will definitely responds to you if she doesn't dislike you.
Good luck.
He's telling you since the opportunity's here, why don't you give it a chance?
Nothing to loose..
But somehow his reply didn't include the fact that both of you are already attached?
Hmm.. Ain't really quite surprised as I didn't really quite catch what you were saying the 1st time I read your post too? Probably was too much in a hurry... My apology.... -
in response to yun:Originally posted by Yunhaier: Yunhaier place three boxes on the table.
'Chose one of the box and that shall be your present.'
You pick one and open it.
It was a toy you loved much.
You played with the toy and never regreted your decision.
However, you begin to wonder what's in the other two boxes.
Will it be as enjoyable as the toy you picked? Will be more expensive? Or what if there is nothing inside?
***
P.S: We questioned about our possible future when in fact there is no way we could turn back, retrace our route and choose other option; we can only begin anew and create a new ending. And yes - you are thinking too much. (Apart from the fact that she has decent impression and ideas about you)
Cheers
Well, we can't reallie turn back time, and its certain that risk involve is great if I decided to open up another box.. esp when both of us hav own relationship tat is >3yrs..
Probably I've been thinking is, this is something I've give it a miss, sort of a regret, and that e feeling is not good esp when I know that its a miscom n misintrepet from my side... a mistake sort of.
So its either I start anew or totally just forget about it and just be friends.
But then sometimes, me friends wuld just say that, guy n gal can't be friends one...sesh... I don think thats true.
To the best interpretation I can have of Yun's post...
I think he's not trying to tell you an OPTION which is AVAILABLE to you now...
He's just telling you that when alternate possibilities are present, people often think and ponder over them... Denying the fact that ONLY ONE CHOICE and DECISION could be MADE.. You CAN'T turn back time and RE-CREATE a NEW ending... Hence, you THINK TOO MUCH....
From his stand, currently your situation offers NO OPTION? -
Originally posted by Devil1976:in response to yun:
Well, we can't reallie turn back time, and its certain that risk involve is great if I decided to open up another box.. esp when both of us hav own relationship tat is >3yrs..
Probably I've been thinking is, this is something I've give it a miss, sort of a regret, and that e feeling is not good esp when I know that its a miscom n misintrepet from my side... a mistake sort of.
So its either I start anew or totally just forget about it and just be friends.
But then sometimes, me friends wuld just say that, guy n gal can't be friends one...sesh... I don think thats true.
To the best interpretation I can have of Yun's post...
I think he's not trying to tell you an OPTION which is AVAILABLE to you now...
He's just telling you that when alternate possibilities are present, people often think and ponder over them... Denying the fact that ONLY ONE CHOICE and DECISION could be MADE.. You CAN'T turn back time and RE-CREATE a NEW ending... Hence, you THINK TOO MUCH....
From his stand, currently your situation offers NO OPTION? When we have make a decision in the past and led them till present, its impossible to retrace back the past and attempt to chose the other alternative and see how things would be like. You can't start all over again; you can only create new ending.
You have an option, but trust me, being together back then and now presents a COMPLETELY different route and lesson altogether. By entering a relationship NOW, doesn't mean it would be the same in the past.
P.S: Devil understand me so well.
Cheers -
Originally posted by Yunhaier:P.S: Devil understand me so well.
Cheers
I can become the 'worm' in your tummy liao.. -
dirge, there's nothing wrong in thinking too much...dun worry it's not wrong..in fact it sets u thinking through.
But i hope, with the insights u have gained from the good advises which ppl here had offered, that you must know both of you have to give each other some time to resolve the relationships problems with your respective partners.
A strong relationship, most of time is not only built through times(e.g. difficults one etc) but also on a good start.
take care and all the best! -
I think all the seniors here have given you very good advices. But in the end, the decision still comes back to you.
Pondering over such things are quite normal (does that very oftened myself) because i guess that you do not wish to hurt anyone. But sometimes, hurting someone else along the way of relationship is inevitable (but that doesn't mean that i encourage you to hurt everyone just to get your ways).
The most important thing (in my view) is that whatever decision you come up with in the near future, do not regret about it, Just like what you have done before (not telling her about how you feel and missed that chance).
All the best to you. -
I agree, pondering is a good thing rather than not thinking bout its presence...
Recently, we just had our first phone chat...well, we usually just send sms but that night, its bout 1am. That night we were suppose to meet up for dinner but both of us had our own stuffs so had to postphone. Anyway, bout 1am while I was chatting, she send me a sms say she's bored at home, so msg me, and she din have her com, so tot of chit chat with me. I told her before that I din like to talk on phone tat much so she asked me again "eh u don like 2 tok on phne hor?me feel like tokin rubbish nw hehehe" So i asked her if she don mind me calling her place, cox it midnight, scared disturb. She then gave me hse number. We then talked bout an hr or so, and boy, its been awhile since I did that..after I put down e phone, she sms me again, thanking me company and she enjoyed tokin 2 me even its on e phone (cox we meet up before and chat for hours outside)
After she asked me that question, it prompt me even more to ask her more.. but then, seems like time doesn't allow me to do that, sigh.... I really wish to find out even though some of u guys may say for what? Since both of us are in a relationship of our own. however, she's takin one step at a time for hers n me, sometimes things wuld jus crop up. We both then confide to each other. -
there is this old song...form the late miss teng...
"ru guo mei you yue jian ni~~..wo xiian zhai hui shi zai na li..~~"
i noe wat u wna hear...
yesh she is intrested in you...wana penetrate ur life.. n also u wanted to
hv her in life as well...
hwever both ur situation nw quite complicated to make it happen..
erm...at many pt of our life.. we r expose to options...there r alot of factors affected our choice...sometime we make wrong decision becos we din take the rite factor into consideration..
if the the problem of getting together can b solve..well do it..if cant
then maybe the fate (rite time n rite situation) is not there...
u can always work against the strong fate current...but provided u r ready to accept the painful consequence... -
yes, she said the same thing, things are complicated, and it not only involves me n her, but 2 more ard us. is it true that shes interested? I'm not sure cox maybe its just friends friends sort of things, u know, cox she told me she's a guys buddy sort of gal. so don wanna get mixed feelings bout it... but at times, I feel that hints is dropping, refer to me first post on this topic
-
hv lah....but not too deep cos .. she dun really wana go tink too deep abt itOriginally posted by dirge:yes, she said the same thing, things are complicated, and it not only involves me n her, but 2 more ard us. is it true that shes interested? I'm not sure cox maybe its just friends friends sort of things, u know, cox she told me she's a guys buddy sort of gal. so don wanna get mixed feelings bout it... but at times, I feel that hints is dropping, refer to me first post on this topic
after consider the situation... -
mmm, maybe true... cox me ger can sense something too... like "why she tell u this why she tell u that" I dunno la, I'm not a female, but true or not, I've yet to know and I've yet to ask and hav a nice talk with her after she asked me e question which I mention in e first post. Time just gets in our way man and its quite hard for us to meet up, cept on weekend as both of us are working.. other than that, we chat on net almost everynight possible..
-
Well, manage to meet up wif her yesterday and chatted quite abit =), its a nice feeling...
I quote this "A few months back, manage to catch up wif a long lost friend bout 6 yrs ago. Initially, its just simple chat n stuffs till we started to have more confiding talks. Well, if anyone has seen blueprints "chase", me story is somewhat similar to that, cept for e ending only. She n I has seen this drama and recently got a message that "well, who knws, mayb blueprint wuld happen in real life"
from my first post. The show "chase" is bout this a guy and ger from each different relationship, who decided to choose each other in e end, to start anew. They knew each other for a long time but lost contact and only get to meet up. So, this shows happens at such a time whereby the scenerio of me n her is bout the same.. we chatted out it last night. She mentioned too that she finds it similar too and had wondered is it destined... cause when she asked me that questions, both of our relationship somehow had problems... and that she realie wondered, what would happen if we were to get together? We also agreed that if both of us were single, things might be easier... but, life is always like that, ain't smooth n perfect -
Just found out something last friday when we meet up again. We talked bout issues that were lingering on our mind. All I can say is that, I did not take enough initiative back then and she figured tat too.
After awhile I finally pluck up the courage and asked "so did u hav interest in me back then"
She replied "yes" But I asked again "back then or now" and a soft reply "recently after we meet up"... gosh... well. probably the reason is that after a few meet ups, both our R/S each has bit of problems here n there, though not happen at the same time. We confide to each other bout our sorrows and all...
After tat day, we chat on the net and she asked again
"but did u consider tt if we did get together in the past..we might turn out well..we might not turn out well"
but well, now..status quo..i dun wish to jeopardise yr relationship..status quo means remain unchanged ..
I replied same goes for me too as it'll affect 2 more other people too.
Partly why we ponder bout this is because not getting together in the past issue n due to the stuff happening now
Well, shes' happy with the relationship tt we are sharing now.. frens but more than tt.
I reply yes as tat wuld mean less a lover, but 1 more friend =)
and she reply " lets leave things to destiny then.. "
Is it that somehow in subconciously, both of us might have tat bit of thinking to try to give each other a chance and have a go at it?
This is wat I feel..... -
I love ur quote....Originally posted by Yunhaier: Yunhaier place three boxes on the table.
'Chose one of the box and that shall be your present.'
You pick one and open it.
It was a toy you loved much.
You played with the toy and never regreted your decision.
However, you begin to wonder what's in the other two boxes.
Will it be as enjoyable as the toy you picked? Will be more expensive? Or what if there is nothing inside?
***
P.S: We questioned about our possible future when in fact there is no way we could turn back, retrace our route and choose other option; we can only begin anew and create a new ending. And yes - you are thinking too much. (Apart from the fact that she has decent impression and ideas about you)
Cheers -
Originally posted by Jazzytunez:I love ur quote....