BF laying about feelings for Ex??
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Would you still haf feelings for your Ex especially if both of u were together for 5 around years. After the breakoff both of you still kept in contact (like via sms and phone calls every 2 weeks or so)
How would u feel if she tells u that she's getting married (after 5 mths breakoff)? Then she kept sms u good night on and off? Or tells you she missed you terribly? And she also ask u to do stuffz for her (like fixing computer and stuff)? While all this you are just being together with a new GF of around 3-4mths.
Will you lie and tell your new GF dat you have completely no feelings all for your Ex? Despite the fact your new GF knows all about the above (phone calls and gd nite sms) and you did try very to dissuade your Ex to rethink about marriage since you had accidentally sms wrongly your new GF while trying to sms to dissuade your Ex in the process?
I think you would more or less guessed that I'm the "New GF" in this scenerio. I got together with him in late April although I haf known him as a friend for about a year. But I felt it was too hasty when I knew that he just broke off with his Ex in early March! and she was the one who initated the breakup.
Even though he kept saying that he only kept in contact with his Ex via sms and phone calls and would not meet her up, later I found out (when I checked his hp infront of him after wanting some concrete assurance that he has nothing to hide) that he actually wanted to meet her up to settle some stuffz with her even though he had repeatedly insisted that he didnt and wouldn't meet up with her a few days before. I was hurt and very angry...and felt used since I felt he's looking for a rebounce relationship and wasn't being very honest with me. He tried to assure me by allowing me to check his HP whenever I wish but WTF, he would clear all her msg from her if he knows that I am checking anyway. In addition, whenever I asked if either his Ex or he had initated any contact recently , he would repeatedly deny.
To top it all off, he finally admitted last month that he was VERY affected by the news of the breakup but again tried to assure me that it was in the past (in May).
Which means he still have feelings for her while we are together...which speak volumns of why he doesn't really wanna chat or acknowledge with me whenever I try to contact him in the initial stage of our RS even though he did try to be physically intimate with me (hugs, kisses) when we were going out that time...
I am still upset over the fact that I couldn't get any emotional support from him during that period even though he is working on it now after I voiced my unhappiness over why he had been so concerned about his Ex's emotional upport while he doesn't seem to bother about mine. Do you know that he only 'erm, errr..hum' thoughout the phone conversion and didn't bother to say my name or say hi, bye when I called him twice in the initial stage of our RS?! At 1st I was wondering why he act so funny that way...since any BF would be absolutely thrilled if their New GF called right?! Then I don't bother to call him at all....and it still make me sore and unhappy to know that he just learnt that his Ex was getting married and was UPSET when I called him the second time.
To make it worse, and to add to my insecurity, he and his Ex had SEX on their 1st date! Although he claimed that they both kinda of knew each other for around 3 years...and she was the one who made the 1st move (what a whore and f***ing slut! she is a primary school teacher yet bedded so many guys!)
All these revelations make me very unhappy whenever I think of all these things. I realised that they affected me greatly since i would wonder and ponder over little things...like why whenever we took photos together, he will be very proper and only put his hands around me while he would KISS his Ex. And that he would rant how expensive and 'wu liao' the Neo prints whenever we passed by one but he still keep those faded stupid Neo prints of him KISSING his Ex. Thinking of this, I really regreted to have done 'it' with him.
Sorry if my post doesn't make sense. I really need a place to rant it all out before I go crazy by the hurt I am experiencing. Although he treats me well...but I find myself unhappy. Am I too stuck over the past to move on this RS? -
Sorry to hear abt your plight.. You really had a long post there and it took me quite a while to understand what you are trying to say..
After the break off with his ex.. u 2 got together in say a mth.. Personally, i don find it fast or don find it slow.. I can say that frm where u are saying he has still alot of feelings for his ex than to you.. Looking into his hp and stuff is invasion of his privacy.. Yes that he is not honest to you.. But do you think that you could have approach him in a better way than to invade his stuff this way?
I wonder where your relationship is heading to.. All along till now ( if he is still your bf) he is lying to you all the way.. To me, he is like treating you as a substitude.. You obviously did not get the emotional support cause he brain was still with his ex.. He does not "think abt you" at that time.
You said that he was upset that his ex is getting married.. That is an obvious point on him that he has feelings still for his ex and not for you..
To cut things short.. I dunno where u 2 are heading.. Should you start sitting down and reconsider the r/s? Cause along the way, the person who is going to get hurt badly is you..
Or, you can wait a while more and see how it goes.. since he says that his ex is getting married.. he may be spending more time with u frm than .. Cool down and think abt it ya?
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tats the past... the neo print thingy. my bf also keep his ex photos. they r together for 4 yrs n after they break off for 4 months, we r together. I have no trust in him too. But i always tell myself tats the past. Juz forget about it n move on. my bf contact with his ex too. i'm sad but nv express to him. i dun call him, he will call me. i seldom msg me he will msg me. coz i dun wanna put all my feelings for him. i'm afraid of getting hurt. juz let the time takes the way. zhou yi bu kan yi bu. dun stick around him go out with ur friends more often. if you wanna talk u can cal me... msg me if u wanna talk. relax
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Originally posted by gur:Would you still haf feelings for your Ex especially if both of u were together for 5 around years. After the breakoff both of you still kept in contact (like via sms and phone calls every 2 weeks or so)
How would u feel if she tells u that she's getting married (after 5 mths breakoff)? Then she kept sms u good night on and off? Or tells you she missed you terribly? And she also ask u to do stuffz for her (like fixing computer and stuff)? While all this you are just being together with a new GF of around 3-4mths.
Will you lie and tell your new GF dat you have completely no feelings all for your Ex? Despite the fact your new GF knows all about the above (phone calls and gd nite sms) and you did try very to dissuade your Ex to rethink about marriage since you had accidentally sms wrongly your new GF while trying to sms to dissuade your Ex in the process?
I think you would more or less guessed that I'm the "New GF" in this scenerio. I got together with him in late April although I haf known him as a friend for about a year. But I felt it was too hasty when I knew that he just broke off with his Ex in early March! and she was the one who initated the breakup.
Even though he kept saying that he only kept in contact with his Ex via sms and phone calls and would not meet her up, later I found out (when I checked his hp infront of him after wanting some concrete assurance that he has nothing to hide) that he actually wanted to meet her up to settle some stuffz with her even though he had repeatedly insisted that he didnt and wouldn't meet up with her a few days before. I was hurt and very angry...and felt used since I felt he's looking for a rebounce relationship and wasn't being very honest with me. He tried to assure me by allowing me to check his HP whenever I wish but WTF, he would clear all her msg from her if he knows that I am checking anyway. In addition, whenever I asked if either his Ex or he had initated any contact recently , he would repeatedly deny.
To top it all off, he finally admitted last month that he was VERY affected by the news of the breakup but again tried to assure me that it was in the past (in May).
Which means he still have feelings for her while we are together...which speak volumns of why he doesn't really wanna chat or acknowledge with me whenever I try to contact him in the initial stage of our RS even though he did try to be physically intimate with me (hugs, kisses) when we were going out that time...
I am still upset over the fact that I couldn't get any emotional support from him during that period even though he is working on it now after I voiced my unhappiness over why he had been so concerned about his Ex's emotional upport while he doesn't seem to bother about mine. Do you know that he only 'erm, errr..hum' thoughout the phone conversion and didn't bother to say my name or say hi, bye when I called him twice in the initial stage of our RS?! At 1st I was wondering why he act so funny that way...since any BF would be absolutely thrilled if their New GF called right?! Then I don't bother to call him at all....and it still make me sore and unhappy to know that he just learnt that his Ex was getting married and was UPSET when I called him the second time.
To make it worse, and to add to my insecurity, he and his Ex had SEX on their 1st date! Although he claimed that they both kinda of knew each other for around 3 years...and she was the one who made the 1st move (what a whore and f***ing slut! she is a primary school teacher yet bedded so many guys!)
All these revelations make me very unhappy whenever I think of all these things. I realised that they affected me greatly since i would wonder and ponder over little things...like why whenever we took photos together, he will be very proper and only put his hands around me while he would KISS his Ex. And that he would rant how expensive and 'wu liao' the Neo prints whenever we passed by one but he still keep those faded stupid Neo prints of him KISSING his Ex. Thinking of this, I really regreted to have done 'it' with him.
Sorry if my post doesn't make sense. I really need a place to rant it all out before I go crazy by the hurt I am experiencing. Although he treats me well...but I find myself unhappy. Am I too stuck over the past to move on this RS?
On the other hand, if your bf is able to move on easily from a relationship of five years - either the relationship itself sux big time, or there is something real wrong with him and I would be telling you to worry like hell.
Yes, you too hasty to be in a relationship with him, thus facing such problems now. I am not saying that by taking your time, you wouldn't have to face such thingy, however, at the period of time - he is just not ready, emotionally. You are at high risk of a rebound and because his emotional dependency is elsewhere, he lack physical dependency. Sad to say, this void is filled by you currently. Most man have this ability - the ability to shut emotions and mate (Ample use of Mars energy).
If I were to say IF HIS ex were to return - I am pretty sure you will be kicked aside immediately.
He is simply not stable for a new relationship to take place in his life. You ought to reconsider your possible option.
Cheers -
He might like you...but I dont think he loves U.Dump him.Originally posted by gur:Am I too stuck over the past to move on this RS? -
I`m sorry to say
but u really give me the opinion that u`re only a substitude for his emotional needs.
as you`ve said
he lost his gf in less than a mth or so and you 2 were together.
is there any courtship involved??
or do u really like him in the 1st place??
i guess it`s rather natural for a 5 yr relationship to be more`unforgetable`
if he cant `get over it`, it rather normal..
but the fact that the gal is getting married in 5 mths ater the break up show something abt the gal too...
if u love your bf.. save him from this gal
you`ve claimed that your BF tried to be nicer to and and such
but he lied abt all those things abt him and meeting his EX..
i know it can be rather devastating for you..
i suggest you do things the other way round.
instead of DEMANDING him to prove his love for u,
you show him how much he can mean to u..
be nice to him
assure him of your love, that u`ll be nice to him and love him like there`s no tmr..
tell him to learn to let go and promise that u understands him and will give him time for these
tell him that u`re upset if u need to suspect him from contacting his EX
NV say you`re angry w tt, but you`re upset and feel hurt...
apply some acts of seduction and bring him to you..
gradually he`ll forget her... cuz your love for him haf cured his scar in the heart..
give him some time
i can see he`s a gd man..
perhap he did not want u to worry about his love rekindle tt why he lied to you..
tell him that there should be no secret btw u all, and that u`ll understand him and give him time..
shower him w your love..
and cure him back to you
gd luck and cheers!! -
there's nothing wrong that he missed his ex...if he dont then he is just an heartless jerk...but....u are right..u are just a rebounce love for him...whether he really like u or not... only time will tell......... so why not......
1) ask for a cool down period now - so he can settle everything with his ex
2) if he serious with u ask him to go after u again - and this time normal date for 6mth or 1yr b4 accepting him lah
3) stop doing anything horny with him now-u are not his toy...
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Wah so long ah the post... Like writing composition. Anyone can help to summarise for me? Lazy to read...
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ditto.Originally posted by Xcert:He might like you...but I dont think he loves U.Dump him.
BUT, things might not always be the way they seem
But, maybe he's treating you... as a free.. erm... you know. =/
Plz forgive me for being so straightforward.
I just got dumped y'know =p
But i'd like to point out that there's two sides to every story. -
Originally posted by gur:
Would you still haf feelings for your Ex especially if both of u were together for 5 around years. After the breakoff both of you still kept in contact (like via sms and phone calls every 2 weeks or so)
How would u feel if she tells u that she's getting married (after 5 mths breakoff)? Then she kept sms u good night on and off? Or tells you she missed you terribly? And she also ask u to do stuffz for her (like fixing computer and stuff)? While all this you are just being together with a new GF of around 3-4mths.
Will you lie and tell your new GF dat you have completely no feelings all for your Ex? Despite the fact your new GF knows all about the above (phone calls and gd nite sms) and you did try very to dissuade your Ex to rethink about marriage since you had accidentally sms wrongly your new GF while trying to sms to dissuade your Ex in the process?
I think you would more or less guessed that I'm the "New GF" in this scenerio. I got together with him in late April although I haf known him as a friend for about a year. But I felt it was too hasty when I knew that he just broke off with his Ex in early March! and she was the one who initated the breakup.
Even though he kept saying that he only kept in contact with his Ex via sms and phone calls and would not meet her up, later I found out (when I checked his hp infront of him after wanting some concrete assurance that he has nothing to hide) that he actually wanted to meet her up to settle some stuffz with her even though he had repeatedly insisted that he didnt and wouldn't meet up with her a few days before. I was hurt and very angry...and felt used since I felt he's looking for a rebounce relationship and wasn't being very honest with me. He tried to assure me by allowing me to check his HP whenever I wish but WTF, he would clear all her msg from her if he knows that I am checking anyway. In addition, whenever I asked if either his Ex or he had initated any contact recently , he would repeatedly deny.
To top it all off, he finally admitted last month that he was VERY affected by the news of the breakup but again tried to assure me that it was in the past (in May).
Which means he still have feelings for her while we are together...which speak volumns of why he doesn't really wanna chat or acknowledge with me whenever I try to contact him in the initial stage of our RS even though he did try to be physically intimate with me (hugs, kisses) when we were going out that time...
I am still upset over the fact that I couldn't get any emotional support from him during that period even though he is working on it now after I voiced my unhappiness over why he had been so concerned about his Ex's emotional upport while he doesn't seem to bother about mine. Do you know that he only 'erm, errr..hum' thoughout the phone conversion and didn't bother to say my name or say hi, bye when I called him twice in the initial stage of our RS?! At 1st I was wondering why he act so funny that way...since any BF would be absolutely thrilled if their New GF called right?! Then I don't bother to call him at all....and it still make me sore and unhappy to know that he just learnt that his Ex was getting married and was UPSET when I called him the second time.
To make it worse, and to add to my insecurity, he and his Ex had SEX on their 1st date! Although he claimed that they both kinda of knew each other for around 3 years...and she was the one who made the 1st move (what a whore and f***ing slut! she is a primary school teacher yet bedded so many guys!)
All these revelations make me very unhappy whenever I think of all these things. I realised that they affected me greatly since i would wonder and ponder over little things...like why whenever we took photos together, he will be very proper and only put his hands around me while he would KISS his Ex. And that he would rant how expensive and 'wu liao' the Neo prints whenever we passed by one but he still keep those faded stupid Neo prints of him KISSING his Ex. Thinking of this, I really regreted to have done 'it' with him.
Sorry if my post doesn't make sense. I really need a place to rant it all out before I go crazy by the hurt I am experiencing. Although he treats me well...but I find myself unhappy. Am I too stuck over the past to move on this RS?
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primary school teacher also need sex ma -
Sorry but the situation don't look good for u cos yr bf clearly has not got over his ex. His ex. is also playing some games with him- still SMS even though they have broken up.
U are the one who initiate the r/s & he is using u as a substitute.
No point carrying on with him unless he gets over her & they stop contacting each other. I'm sure U don't want a r/s without trust.
Tell him to do some soul searching & call u when he is finally over her.