Advise Needed Badly
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Hi people
I needed an advise badly. Please help.
I got to know a guy A through my buddy who is older than me by 2 years. He owns a business and that is why he seldom has time for me. But he has all the characteritcs of a good husband and he adores me very much.
Recently, I got bumbed into a ex-school mate B and we began meeting up everyday. He is younger than me by a year. He can give me the time I need. He asked me to be with him although he knows I am attached. He is such a guy who will clings to his gf and needs his gf to cling to him.
I do loved my bf A and I am one who needs accompany too.
Please advise...
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So you've got 2 boyfriends??? and only 1 of them "clings to his gf" but has not asked you to commit.. so see them both and have fun!
What's the problem??? -
A 100% satisfied woman can never be seduced. This applies to men too.Originally posted by pyip:Hi people
I needed an advise badly. Please help.
I got to know a guy A through my buddy who is older than me by 2 years. He owns a business and that is why he seldom has time for me. But he has all the characteritcs of a good husband and he adores me very much.
Recently, I got bumbed into a ex-school mate B and we began meeting up everyday. He is younger than me by a year. He can give me the time I need. He asked me to be with him although he knows I am attached. He is such a guy who will clings to his gf and needs his gf to cling to him.
I do loved my bf A and I am one who needs accompany too.
Please advise...
From the info you have provided, it seems you are not happy that your current bf did not spend enough time with you.
Do not stray if your relationship has met a difficulty, learn to talk to your bf about it, else, every relationship will just be a vicious cycle for you. -
ok.....do you prefer someone that u love or someone that loves u?Originally posted by pyip:Hi people
I needed an advise badly. Please help.
I got to know a guy A through my buddy who is older than me by 2 years. He owns a business and that is why he seldom has time for me. But he has all the characteritcs of a good husband and he adores me very much.
Recently, I got bumbed into a ex-school mate B and we began meeting up everyday. He is younger than me by a year. He can give me the time I need. He asked me to be with him although he knows I am attached. He is such a guy who will clings to his gf and needs his gf to cling to him.
I do loved my bf A and I am one who needs accompany too.
Please advise... -
Of coz be together with the one u love. Or u only fall in love with ACCOMPANY??!!
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Get friends.. Get activities and hobbies.. Talk to bf A....Originally posted by pyip:Hi people
I needed an advise badly. Please help.
I got to know a guy A through my buddy who is older than me by 2 years. He owns a business and that is why he seldom has time for me. But he has all the characteritcs of a good husband and he adores me very much.
Recently, I got bumbed into a ex-school mate B and we began meeting up everyday. He is younger than me by a year. He can give me the time I need. He asked me to be with him although he knows I am attached. He is such a guy who will clings to his gf and needs his gf to cling to him.
I do loved my bf A and I am one who needs accompany too.
Please advise... -
Decide what you want in life.
If you can't decide now, just have (safe) fun, and enjoy yourself, until you know what you want. Don't pressure yourself or be pressured into making a hasty decision. -
Just wondering, Pyip, how old are you?
If not ready to settle down yet, and if B really gives you wat you need in a rship, then you'd be happier with him. -
From your post.. one can see that you cannot differentiate between friends and couple (bf/gf or husband/wife).. A is someone whom you mention will be able to provide you well and have a good characteristics of a husband.. Although he seldome have time for you, at least he is making use of his time in work than to go flirting with other girls out there..Originally posted by pyip:Hi people
I needed an advise badly. Please help.
I got to know a guy A through my buddy who is older than me by 2 years. He owns a business and that is why he seldom has time for me. But he has all the characteritcs of a good husband and he adores me very much.
Recently, I got bumbed into a ex-school mate B and we began meeting up everyday. He is younger than me by a year. He can give me the time I need. He asked me to be with him although he knows I am attached. He is such a guy who will clings to his gf and needs his gf to cling to him.
I do loved my bf A and I am one who needs accompany too.
Please advise...
As for B, he is your ex sch mate.. Meeting up with him as friends everyday will not mean that he can or will be your bf or what.. You can always call him or your friends to accompany you out.. Does not mean that when your bf does not spend enough time with you.. and does not accompany you, you go around looking for another guy for companionship..
You cannot have the best of both worlds.
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Dear pyip,Originally posted by pyip:Hi people
I needed an advise badly. Please help.
I got to know a guy A through my buddy who is older than me by 2 years. He owns a business and that is why he seldom has time for me. But he has all the characteritcs of a good husband and he adores me very much.
Recently, I got bumbed into a ex-school mate B and we began meeting up everyday. He is younger than me by a year. He can give me the time I need. He asked me to be with him although he knows I am attached. He is such a guy who will clings to his gf and needs his gf to cling to him.
I do loved my bf A and I am one who needs accompany too.
Please advise...
Go widen your social cirlces.. like what devil has mention.. get more activites.. take up some hobbies.. to know more friends and kill time too.. Guy B can make a good companion.. But that doesn't mean that a r/s has to develop from there.. He can be there anytime you wan him to be.. but then is because.. he can filled up your emptiness or loneliness.. or jus when you needed someone to be there with you...
On the other hand.. Guy A may not have so much time to spend with you.. But if he does.. he treasure every single moment with you.. And this oso keep him yearning/ wanting to see you more.. Going into a r/s is not about seeing each other.. or how much time you spend together.. Is the value of treasuring.. and the time spent each time you both are together.. how much it means to you..
Guy B ask you to be with him.. cos he knows that your bf A has no time for you.. and he oso have no gf.. got lots of time to kill.. this might be one of the reasons why he asking you this..
Think about it.. Is this for love?? or jus for the companion/ company that both need..
Cheer... -
Learn to be more independent. Keep yourself occupied with some hobby or activities.
Being in a relationship does not mean seeing each other every day.
Are u sure u want a bf who clings to u? After awhile u will get sick of him.
Talk to A & compromise. Career is impt but must also need to spend time together, suggest keeping weekends for each other. -
i agree wif mancha..get to know wat u wan..however, not encouraging u be two-timer, jus find out more than each of them then decide..i know some ppl tend to feel lonely easily, but there's no perfect ppl in the world !Originally posted by mancha:Decide what you want in life.
If you can't decide now, just have (safe) fun, and enjoy yourself, until you know what you want. Don't pressure yourself or be pressured into making a hasty decision. -
Pyip,
What advise do u need?
You love bf A and bf A loves you. What's the problem?
What's the right thing to do?
Your problem arise probably u are insecure and u seek affirmation elsewhere.
If u think u have not found what u are looking for, or if u did but found not enough, go ahead & leave bf A. -
Is that really necessary..?Originally posted by Magnus:Pyip,
What advise do u need?
You love bf A and bf A loves you. What's the problem?
What's the right thing to do?
Your problem arise probably u are insecure and u seek affirmation elsewhere.
If u think u have not found what u are looking for, or if u did but found not enough, go ahead & leave bf A.
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just think wisely. always stick to one. if you play timer now, both will ends up running away from you. Then dejavu will happen to you... if you next bf have know, unwatedly, he is doing the same thing you did now.Originally posted by pyip:Hi people
I needed an advise badly. Please help.
I got to know a guy A through my buddy who is older than me by 2 years. He owns a business and that is why he seldom has time for me. But he has all the characteritcs of a good husband and he adores me very much.
Recently, I got bumbed into a ex-school mate B and we began meeting up everyday. He is younger than me by a year. He can give me the time I need. He asked me to be with him although he knows I am attached. He is such a guy who will clings to his gf and needs his gf to cling to him.
I do loved my bf A and I am one who needs accompany too.
Please advise...
it just an old folks believe but it happen to me twice.
just remember, going the wrong path will leave you alone in the dark. -
Hi all
I appreciated all the replies
Thanks a lot.
Well, I did talked to A and he promised to arrange and will manage his time between work & me. But for the past 2 months, I onli saw him twice and less than 5 phone calls from him. My feeling is that I have a bf like dun have lor. The unhappiness and loneness are terrible. My gf always ask me: Where is my bf? All I can replied is tat he is working lor. Sigh.. -
Really that bad? What kinda business is he doing? Good husband's character or not, he should learn to balance between his love one(s) and his own career?Originally posted by pyip:Hi all
I appreciated all the replies Thanks a lot.
Well, I did talked to A and he promised to arrange and will manage his time between work & me. But for the past 2 months, I onli saw him twice and less than 5 phone calls from him. My feeling is that I have a bf like dun have lor. The unhappiness and loneness are terrible. My gf always ask me: Where is my bf? All I can replied is tat he is working lor. Sigh..
What do you think? If he don't have time for you now, would he have enough time for you in the future? Meeting only 2 times and 5 phone calls are INDEED really little... -
2 mths only met twice? then only 5calls?
maybe... maybe he has sumone else outside...
dating time sure miss gf alot, if away will even call lots more.
im also very dependent on my bf.
when he was away for work, overseas, we called n talked everyday!
on the day he fly off, i cry leh...keke...
only after so many yrs, as a husband now...
things are diff. i hv to learn to be more independent also.
he has his career to pursue... but he balances our family time n work well.
so anyway, wat im trying to tell you is, aguy now may give u all his time.
but u still hv to learn to be more independent, cos he cant always be by ur side. next time when ur gonna set up ur own family...
he has to work harder n bring bread home... tat time he cant always 24/7 with u liaos. esp if his job needs him to travel.
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wah
i tell u
u can dump him liao.
no matter how busy a person can get, if he truly loves u, he will definitely make some time for u.. -
Well, man is always career driven for many many reasons and one of them is about having the financial health to support his family.
Of course, you will want to be companied by your BF more often while he will has his own problems on his business. Why not visit his work place and see if there's anything you can help out? This way, you can see him more often and understand what and why he is so busy about?
As for the ex-mate B, well, do you want another girl to stick to him or seduce him knowing that he is attached to you???
Try communicating your feelings/ problem to your current BF and try understanding what he is doing for a living. Afterall, this is what relationship is about, isn't it? Communicating the differences and understanding each other.. -
Eh my problem opp of urs.. my ex always no time for me. she must meet her 100 000 frens on a rotating basis, clubbin at least twice a week, on top of her very hectic work scheduleOriginally posted by pyip:Hi all
I appreciated all the replies Thanks a lot.
Well, I did talked to A and he promised to arrange and will manage his time between work & me. But for the past 2 months, I onli saw him twice and less than 5 phone calls from him. My feeling is that I have a bf like dun have lor. The unhappiness and loneness are terrible. My gf always ask me: Where is my bf? All I can replied is tat he is working lor. Sigh..
why ppl of opp characters always end up together?? -
Ask yourself:
- What do I want from a relationship?
- What do I expect of my boyfriend?
- Why do I need to go into a relationship?
- Can this relationship be maintained all the way till marriage?
All these questions will help you to understand what you really want from a relationship. From there, you'll be clearer of the situation and be able to make your own decisions.
Some comments: Your boyfriend adores you, and has the good qualities of a husband. But are you certain that he is showing his true personality, and not acting in front of you? Do you really love him for who he is? Are you certain that you can put up with this all the way till marriage?
As for B, do you really like him? Or are you giving in to him just because he can give you the company that you desire?
Make your decisions wisely, because you're going to live with that person for quite a long time. -
From the way u stated ur problem, it really made me doubt ur love for your boy fren. As u had acknowledged, your boy fren adores you alot and do you think its fair for you to go have fun with other guys behind his back???Originally posted by pyip:Hi people
I needed an advise badly. Please help.
I got to know a guy A through my buddy who is older than me by 2 years. He owns a business and that is why he seldom has time for me. But he has all the characteritcs of a good husband and he adores me very much.
Recently, I got bumbed into a ex-school mate B and we began meeting up everyday. He is younger than me by a year. He can give me the time I need. He asked me to be with him although he knows I am attached. He is such a guy who will clings to his gf and needs his gf to cling to him.
I do loved my bf A and I am one who needs accompany too.
Please advise...
Sure he may be busy due to his work but its definitely better den busy wif other ladies out there! Don forget, if you and boy fren A get married, you would be the one enjoying the fruits of his labour!!!
Do you really love boy fren A, or is the reason for being with him due to the fact that he would be a good provider for the rest of your life???? -
juz to sae...dun make a wrong move...
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PYip,
Pls dun flame me, but I'm juz gonna ask u a qn...
If u really do love ur bf, wld u actually seriously think abt being wif ur ex-school mate?
I'm Not being unrealistic. Sure, we sometimes get attracted to other pple, but it depends on whether u act on tt temptation. In this case, u're seriously considering Guy B.
If u're doing tt, Guy A wld Not be the right guy for u. Neither is Guy B, who shows No integrity when it comes to chasing a woman who's taken.
Guy A seems gd cosh he seems like husband material & can provide u material comfort. That's Not fair to Guy A if tt's the main reason why u love him.
FeowFeowOriginally posted by pyip:Hi people
I needed an advise badly. Please help.
I got to know a guy A through my buddy who is older than me by 2 years. He owns a business and that is why he seldom has time for me. But he has all the characteritcs of a good husband and he adores me very much.
Recently, I got bumbed into a ex-school mate B and we began meeting up everyday. He is younger than me by a year. He can give me the time I need. He asked me to be with him although he knows I am attached. He is such a guy who will clings to his gf and needs his gf to cling to him.
I do loved my bf A and I am one who needs accompany too.
Please advise...