WHAT IS LOVE AGAIN?
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in summary, i am questioning my relationship w my wife.
ive known her almost my whole life, and i love her, and though there were times i was not sure of myself, i have always come back to her end of the day... that is, until recently.
i met this woman while she was on a 1 week tour to s'pore for work. though we've known each other since her 1st day here, nothing happened betw us. however, on the 3rd last day, sparks flew out of nowhere (kinda like the movies) and the last 3 days before she left we spent as much time as we could. it wasnt sexual at all, but rather it was some strange and magnetic attraction that is unexplainable. yet it was truly amazing.
before anyone starts pointing fingers, no, there wasnt sex involved, except 1 kiss. but to me (and her probably) it was like a kiss that dreams are built on, which was way more than enough...
anyway shes gone, and my lifes back to *normal*... still do think of her all the friggin time. was tt love? cos that wasnt a crush, not built on the love-at-first-sight basis, cosmic is the closest word i can describe... weird cos i dint expect to experience this at the ripe old age of 28.
so where does my wife come in? nowhere really. i still do love her, and she is a great girl, and i cant think of anyone who is more suitable, but somehow the feeling's different.
i really hope theres someone out there who has been in situations like this to shed some light. could really grab some advice. can a person love more than 1 person, for different reasons? -
Yes... A person can love more than one person...
But in your situation, you're probably just into a temporary kinda 'escape'... Age of 28 or more.. Doesn't really matter.. We 'escape' (or wanna) from our life once in a while.... This is just one of them which happened...
Since not much damage is done, you shouldn't really be too bothered by it... But if you really love your wife, you should really be careful of what you do in the future...?
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Hmmmm i would advice u to try to bring your wife and yourselves to go somewhere etc. travelling or do something wild once a while. This will "refill" the flames with oilOriginally posted by posterboy_101:in summary, i am questioning my relationship w my wife.
ive known her almost my whole life, and i love her, and though there were times i was not sure of myself, i have always come back to her end of the day... that is, until recently.
i met this woman while she was on a 1 week tour to s'pore for work. though we've known each other since her 1st day here, nothing happened betw us. however, on the 3rd last day, sparks flew out of nowhere (kinda like the movies) and the last 3 days before she left we spent as much time as we could. it wasnt sexual at all, but rather it was some strange and magnetic attraction that is unexplainable. yet it was truly amazing.
before anyone starts pointing fingers, no, there wasnt sex involved, except 1 kiss. but to me (and her probably) it was like a kiss that dreams are built on, which was way more than enough...
anyway shes gone, and my lifes back to *normal*... still do think of her all the friggin time. was tt love? cos that wasnt a crush, not built on the love-at-first-sight basis, cosmic is the closest word i can describe... weird cos i dint expect to experience this at the ripe old age of 28.
so where does my wife come in? nowhere really. i still do love her, and she is a great girl, and i cant think of anyone who is more suitable, but somehow the feeling's different.
i really hope theres someone out there who has been in situations like this to shed some light. could really grab some advice. can a person love more than 1 person, for different reasons?
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Anyway im just a 23 year old guy but i do have elder brothers that married at your age... but ask yourselves this .... when we were young,we always trying to do crazy things right???why? its fun...its wild. So try again to do those things...i know u are married/working and possible have less time with family... but a "little" investment in time will bring long way in marriage.
Good Luck...and try to update us on your situation -
Originally posted by posterboy_101:in summary, i am questioning my relationship w my wife.
ive known her almost my whole life, and i love her, and though there were times i was not sure of myself, i have always come back to her end of the day... that is, until recently.
i met this woman while she was on a 1 week tour to s'pore for work. though we've known each other since her 1st day here, nothing happened betw us. however, on the 3rd last day, sparks flew out of nowhere (kinda like the movies) and the last 3 days before she left we spent as much time as we could. it wasnt sexual at all, but rather it was some strange and magnetic attraction that is unexplainable. yet it was truly amazing.
before anyone starts pointing fingers, no, there wasnt sex involved, except 1 kiss. but to me (and her probably) it was like a kiss that dreams are built on, which was way more than enough...
anyway shes gone, and my lifes back to *normal*... still do think of her all the friggin time. was tt love? cos that wasnt a crush, not built on the love-at-first-sight basis, cosmic is the closest word i can describe... weird cos i dint expect to experience this at the ripe old age of 28.
so where does my wife come in? nowhere really. i still do love her, and she is a great girl, and i cant think of anyone who is more suitable, but somehow the feeling's different.
i really hope theres someone out there who has been in situations like this to shed some light. could really grab some advice. can a person love more than 1 person, for different reasons?
I've been there before and the guy that I met at that time in the middle of my married life was from Perth, an average and sweet guy but too bad I thought in the first place he's the one for me and I was really so confident and sure about it but after sometime when I emailed and I called him, I found out about something that strikes me suddenly that he's not the one for me, the one for me is standing next to me and loving me endlessly, he's not meant to be the guy that I want in life but God has created him to be with me and so we have to accept and be contented of what we have at this point of time, we have to accept what God created him to be a Mr Not-perfect and that we have to make him perfect in life. So I suggest that you stick to what you have now and be contented ... -
Maybe having been married for so long, u have taken each other for granted.
So when someone new comes along, u get tempted.
Try & spend time with yr wife, go for short holiday together.
Bring her for romantic dinners etc.
Remember yr courtship days & all the good qualities of yr wife. -
hi all,
just pondering over whats been said
i think its a case of having the cake and wanting to eat it too. life's just full of chocos yadayada... qn is: to be selfish or not to be. (if anyones getting the drift)
yeah but i reckon tt everything is alright if one chooses not to CROSS the line.
what i wanted to point out is:
1) in life maybe nothings perfect. if you find someone who can communicate w you on the utmost level, have great sex, compliments your character completely, then good on you cos you found a perfect partner. grab on to him/her for your dear lives, but that aint the case for me. i will work on the expectation bit but i guess its my life.
2) love is something so damn abstract. u cant explain it, let alone label it. who is to say what is, or what is not, love? and love can exist on many different levels... sheesh... better not comment too much on it cos i sure as hell am not an expert (otherwise i wont be here lamenting right?)
3) commitment: take it seriously. its your basic responsibility as a human being. or at least it is dictated by society.
i think we primates arent built for monogamy. but rules bind us to be so. end of the day, long as you claim all responsibility for your actions, i think everyones got a right to live your own life.
pparker out. -
Remember your marriage vows.
Do not sway.
Do not fall into temptation.
Just think of the recent tragedy of a small girl being thrown by a woman and she died yesterday. I heard this is the result of the unfaithful husband giving promises to his lover which he later cannot fulfil. The lover took revenge. -
7 yr itch?
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Devil1976...
what u said made sense. thanks for the kind advice.
ahmike & gerrykoh...
i know where you guys are coming from, and yeah, i sorta agre with you. but this short r'ship i had was smthg outta my day-in-day-out life, kinda like being in a totally different dimension... see how it goes back to the idea of being escapist?
mimi...
thanks for sharing your experience, i had smthg similar while studying as well, before i got married, but this is a different scenario. you do sound like you are trying to convince yourself out of that situation you were in. For me i totally accept the situation, but i can understand that a part of me wants to live in this fantasy world that romance can exist out of the blue...
call it fate? i dunno... i sure as hell am not gonna grab the next flight to america to be with her (shes non asian, while i am)... but i have a feeling that should our paths meet again i wont hold back either...
patrickLTH...
do not ever stop yourself from doing things for fear of consequences. if its worth the gamble go for it. Having said that, i think that guy in the papers was just naive and stupid, and underestimated the wrath of a woman scorned...
audlenelee
maybe? but not really. i did not specifically go out hunting for women, and i have no marital problems. it just came, and it just so happened that the feeling was mutual.
i think i am lucky, to experience this. its smthg worth cherishing, really. -
call it fate? i dunno... i sure as hell am not gonna grab the next flight to america to be with her (shes non asian, while i am)... but i have a feeling that should our paths meet again i wont hold back either...
audlenelee
maybe? but not really. i did not specifically go out hunting for women, and i have no marital problems. it just came, and it just so happened that the feeling was mutual.
i think i am lucky, to experience this. its smthg worth cherishing, really.
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We are all adults and should be responsible for all our actions and all the consequences that happen immediately or at a later stage in life.
I can only say there are many temptations in life and it is really up to individuals to cherish or give up whatever they have at present to go for it.
Think about it, you wouldn't feel lucky if it is your wife who has experienced this. (Sorry if I offend you in any way, just my personal view) -
You're drifting and probably slowly falling apart... It's not a good sign...?Originally posted by posterboy_101:call it fate? i dunno... i sure as hell am not gonna grab the next flight to america to be with her (shes non asian, while i am)... but i have a feeling that should our paths meet again i wont hold back either...
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You can love more than 1 if you allow your heart.. The one you love most might not be the one that is the most suitable for you (the woman).. Same goes to the one whom you don't love most is the one for you (your wife)..Originally posted by posterboy_101:in summary, i am questioning my relationship w my wife.
ive known her almost my whole life, and i love her, and though there were times i was not sure of myself, i have always come back to her end of the day... that is, until recently.
i met this woman while she was on a 1 week tour to s'pore for work. though we've known each other since her 1st day here, nothing happened betw us. however, on the 3rd last day, sparks flew out of nowhere (kinda like the movies) and the last 3 days before she left we spent as much time as we could. it wasnt sexual at all, but rather it was some strange and magnetic attraction that is unexplainable. yet it was truly amazing.
before anyone starts pointing fingers, no, there wasnt sex involved, except 1 kiss. but to me (and her probably) it was like a kiss that dreams are built on, which was way more than enough...
anyway shes gone, and my lifes back to *normal*... still do think of her all the friggin time. was tt love? cos that wasnt a crush, not built on the love-at-first-sight basis, cosmic is the closest word i can describe... weird cos i dint expect to experience this at the ripe old age of 28.
so where does my wife come in? nowhere really. i still do love her, and she is a great girl, and i cant think of anyone who is more suitable, but somehow the feeling's different.
i really hope theres someone out there who has been in situations like this to shed some light. could really grab some advice. can a person love more than 1 person, for different reasons?
Love is one thing that unexplainable.. Once in awhile, right in the middle of an ordinary life, love gives us a fairy tale... Love is not a matter of counting the years... But making the years count.
Cheers.. -
dun even think about it....there's a time to flirt and a time to get serious
sway and if your wife get some air of it trust shall be shken unless your
wife reaally trust you a lot...but ask urself u being fair to your wife and ur kids (if u have any)?
i know there is alway s adivorce / separation certificate or paper to sign on but please do no even think about it....just read my signature guys....