What the lamest medical excuse you have seen or heard?
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excuse shaving. so he shave only once a week.
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Actually i have one friend who is allegic to sunlight, everytime go out must take panodol, or else will feel faint.
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Heard got excused rifle and and excused boots...i wonder this is the cult that cannot handle rifles, and they spend their NS lives in DB...SAD
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Hahaha... after reading all the posts, I think my story is the strangest ( but not necessarily the lamest)...
A recruit came up to me one day ... he asked " ... can I see you for a personal problem...? I want to be excused from Fire and Movement exercise !" I replied rather suspiciously "... sure but how is a personal problem related to a field training ...?".
He then replied "It is very personal and would prefer that we talk in the platoon office where it is private."
We proceeded to the office where I sat down at my desk , he stood before the desk. Then he began to unbotton his PT shorts! "Whoa ! ... what are you up to ?" I yelled at him !
He then said that he had a crooked dick ! He claimed that while doing Fire and Movement practice a few days ago, he had an erection (!!!???) and when he proned down he "broke" his dick ! He went to see an outside GP at the weekend, but the GP said nothing can be done at the moment but some corrective surgery will be needed later in his life. The recruit said that his thingy was at a right angle permanently, and he has to be excused from prone position because he is afraid it will "bend" further under pressure !
Needless to say, I dismissed him and ordered him to get his thingy checked up by the camp MO. As far as I remember, he was never excused prone position , after the MO check-up ! Not sure if he has had corrective surgery after NS. -
erection while proning?
what kinda fetish did he have?
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fake some bipolar disorder.. lol.. or pretend to be gay
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Penile fractures can and do happen. These may require corrective surgery in bad cases.
Refer to this: http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a2_426.html -
grass fetish....Originally posted by RockeY:erection while proning?
what kinda fetish did he have? -
He so on really jump prone even while having an erection? I thought it's human nature to support with their knees a bit to protect your didiOriginally posted by specfore:Hahaha... after reading all the posts, I think my story is the strangest ( but not necessarily the lamest)...
A recruit came up to me one day ... he asked " ... can I see you for a personal problem...? I want to be excused from Fire and Movement exercise !" I replied rather suspiciously "... sure but how is a personal problem related to a field training ...?".
He then replied "It is very personal and would prefer that we talk in the platoon office where it is private."
We proceeded to the office where I sat down at my desk , he stood before the desk. Then he began to unbotton his PT shorts! "Whoa ! ... what are you up to ?" I yelled at him !
He then said that he had a crooked dick ! He claimed that while doing Fire and Movement practice a few days ago, he had an erection (!!!???) and when he proned down he "broke" his dick ! He went to see an outside GP at the weekend, but the GP said nothing can be done at the moment but some corrective surgery will be needed later in his life. The recruit said that his thingy was at a right angle permanently, and he has to be excused from prone position because he is afraid it will "bend" further under pressure !
Needless to say, I dismissed him and ordered him to get his thingy checked up by the camp MO. As far as I remember, he was never excused prone position , after the MO check-up ! Not sure if he has had corrective surgery after NS. -
i think u r talking abt the Jehovah Witnesses. they will tend to nursery, laundry, food while serving their sentence...Originally posted by amego:Heard got excused rifle and and excused boots...i wonder this is the cult that cannot handle rifles, and they spend their NS lives in DB...SAD
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wait wait...!!! so while showing you.... his birdie was hard!!!?? else soft how to see crooked or not!!!Originally posted by specfore:Hahaha... after reading all the posts, I think my story is the strangest ( but not necessarily the lamest)...
A recruit came up to me one day ... he asked " ... can I see you for a personal problem...? I want to be excused from Fire and Movement exercise !" I replied rather suspiciously "... sure but how is a personal problem related to a field training ...?".
He then replied "It is very personal and would prefer that we talk in the platoon office where it is private."
We proceeded to the office where I sat down at my desk , he stood before the desk. Then he began to unbotton his PT shorts! "Whoa ! ... what are you up to ?" I yelled at him !
He then said that he had a crooked dick ! He claimed that while doing Fire and Movement practice a few days ago, he had an erection (!!!???) and when he proned down he "broke" his dick ! He went to see an outside GP at the weekend, but the GP said nothing can be done at the moment but some corrective surgery will be needed later in his life. The recruit said that his thingy was at a right angle permanently, and he has to be excused from prone position because he is afraid it will "bend" further under pressure !
Needless to say, I dismissed him and ordered him to get his thingy checked up by the camp MO. As far as I remember, he was never excused prone position , after the MO check-up ! Not sure if he has had corrective surgery after NS. -
One fella my time did that but was caught by the RSM...kenna charged..Originally posted by pwnz0r:One of the best is this fella who claims he got knee problems and limp around camp with a walking stick. But outside camp can run after bus...
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Cut it off...no more problem after thatOriginally posted by specfore:Needless to say, I dismissed him and ordered him to get his thingy checked up by the camp MO. As far as I remember, he was never excused prone position , after the MO check-up ! Not sure if he has had corrective surgery after NS. -
Excuse me sir, but I won't be in today. My home is flooded and I'm currently standing on my dresser in my second story bedroom. Thanks and have a nice day.
Hello, This is, ________ I've used all of my sick days and I'm calling in dead. -
durin bmt, my platoon mate went 2 medical centre without tellin any of e commanders durin strength trainin... he waz rewarded wif...
1 dae attend B
n 1 day guard duty... -
Originally posted by specfore:Hahaha... after reading all the posts, I think my story is the strangest ( but not necessarily the lamest)...
A recruit came up to me one day ... he asked " ... can I see you for a personal problem...? I want to be excused from Fire and Movement exercise !" I replied rather suspiciously "... sure but how is a personal problem related to a field training ...?".
He then replied "It is very personal and would prefer that we talk in the platoon office where it is private."
We proceeded to the office where I sat down at my desk , he stood before the desk. Then he began to unbotton his PT shorts! "Whoa ! ... what are you up to ?" I yelled at him !
He then said that he had a crooked dick ! He claimed that while doing Fire and Movement practice a few days ago, he had an erection (!!!???) and when he proned down he "broke" his dick ! He went to see an outside GP at the weekend, but the GP said nothing can be done at the moment but some corrective surgery will be needed later in his life. The recruit said that his thingy was at a right angle permanently, and he has to be excused from prone position because he is afraid it will "bend" further under pressure !
Needless to say, I dismissed him and ordered him to get his thingy checked up by the camp MO. As far as I remember, he was never excused prone position , after the MO check-up ! Not sure if he has had corrective surgery after NS.
there are no bones where the tool is. how can it fracture?!?
why was he having an erection in the midst of a fire and movement practice? i think this ought to be investigated... some even deeper issues to be discovered...
you mentioned he said he had a crooked dick. did you actually see it for yourself? -
my encik once said, those excuse footwear must walk around barefoot.
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No, I did not want to see. 2 reasons... not sure what he was up to !.... Secondly, not the medical expert. If I did not "play by the book" , I may get into trouble. I was in my last 4 months of NS as a Platoon Sgt, and was looking forward to my university studies in the UK. No way I am going to get into trouble with recruits !Originally posted by wuming78:
there are no bones where the tool is. how can it fracture?!?
why was he having an erection in the midst of a fire and movement practice? i think this ought to be investigated... some even deeper issues to be discovered...
you mentioned he said he had a crooked dick. did you actually see it for yourself?
The soft bone in your dick can be broken. I later asked a medical student friend of mine. -
my ex IC was excused handling of arms, but he's a weapon tech.Originally posted by KenPlus:I remember my camp there is this technician who got excuse oil,i dunno how he got it,the OC also dunno what work he can do after getting excuse oil,imagine a technician who can't touch oil Lol -
a friend of mine broke his during his 'first time'. it's quite sad.Originally posted by fudgester:Penile fractures can and do happen. These may require corrective surgery in bad cases.
Refer to this: http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a2_426.html -
reason?Originally posted by nismoS132:my ex IC was excused handling of arms, but he's a weapon tech. -
There isn't any bone in your penis, but what can happen is if get bent in a direction, it can burst the blood vessels.
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Heh, seen those around.Originally posted by nismoS132:my ex IC was excused handling of arms, but he's a weapon tech. -
he was combat, broke his shoulder and had stuff inserted inside. supposedly unable to move freely or exert strength, or give a strong enough grip to absorb the recoil.Originally posted by Uncle_MooMoo:reason? -
Excused rifle due to mental problem. Else could shoot PC.