Share Your Marriage Experience
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Actually, if you don't love him and keep putting him down, wouldn't it be better to break it off? Usually, people recall their proposal stories with glee but the tone here is definitely different.Originally posted by Lingos:Goes like this....
You know he asked infront of his family right. For goodness sake, this guy cannot do anything without his parents or something.
Anyway he hid it in the bathroom. ..... everyone had their presents and i was the last to get mine from him. He runs off.. everyone is like.. yeah yeah a Gucci shopping bag, that's normal. Then I'm like.. WTF.
He struggled to say anything, he's like you know we've been together for a long time. (his mum and sister starts crying in excitement).. I'm thinking.. omg i didn't drive here, how can i get out.
Meanwhile his hands shake so much and you know how boutiques wrap their stuff up.. ribbons upon ribbons and lots of tissue packaged inside. The box was wrapped too and had another cardboard box. I'm like.. ripping it up myself cos he was shaking. And i opened the box.. and i said.. Oh no no no this ring is too small. I cannot wear it... maybe on my little finger.
In the long run, you and him, will be happier. Just my two cents' worth. -
x 2Originally posted by Rhonda:Actually, if you don't love him and keep putting him down, wouldn't it be better to break it off? Usually, people recall their proposal stories with glee but the tone here is definitely different.
In the long run, you and him, will be happier. Just my two cents' worth.
even dear Rhonda can sense it! -
Well, I think the best thing we can do here is just to share our honest thoughts because sometimes, we might not see what's really happening, but it's ultimately still up to Lingos to make her choices and live her life.Originally posted by BaByBoY:x 2
even dear Rhonda can sense it! -
thou i`ve not gotten marriedOriginally posted by Rhonda:Well, I think the best thing we can do here is just to share our honest thoughts because sometimes, we might not see what's really happening, but it's ultimately still up to Lingos to make her choices and live her life.
but i`ll like to share how my teacher got married
it`s really very romantic
my teacher and her then BF were steady for nearly 4 yrs before they tied the knot,
as it begins
my teacher always had a special craving for Mr Softee from 7/11
so one day, while my teacher wat out paktoring w her bf, the both of them passed by a 7/11 on the other side of the road,
suddenly, her bf asked her to stay there while he dashed across the road towards the 7/11.. somehow my teacher was rather stuck.. why did he run so fast??
minutes later, he came back w a cup of Mr Softee,
when her bf came back, she gave him a big pinch and it made him bruise on the left arm, for letting her wait there like a silly gal
but she felt really sweet that wat can back w him was the ice cream,
at least he rushed to buy for her
wat really melts her heart is the BIG diamond ring that she found when she almost finish her ice cream,
her bf simply kneel down and proposed to her` Jia gei wo ba!`
My teacher ran into tears,
tt`s how my teacher told us.
touching aint it??
my whole class was invited to the dinner
kekek -
wah!!!!Originally posted by BaByBoY:thou i`ve not gotten married
but i`ll like to share how my teacher got married
it`s really very romantic
my teacher and her then BF were steady for nearly 4 yrs before they tied the knot,
as it begins
my teacher always had a special craving for Mr Softee from 7/11
so one day, while my teacher wat out paktoring w her bf, the both of them passed by a 7/11 on the other side of the road,
suddenly, her bf asked her to stay there while he dashed across the road towards the 7/11.. somehow my teacher was rather stuck.. why did he run so fast??
minutes later, he came back w a cup of Mr Softee,
when her bf came back, she gave him a big pinch and it made him bruise on the left arm, for letting her wait there like a silly gal
but she felt really sweet that wat can back w him was the ice cream,
at least he rushed to buy for her
wat really melts her heart is the BIG diamond ring that she found when she almost finish her ice cream,
her bf simply kneel down and proposed to her` Jia gei wo ba!`
My teacher ran into tears,
tt`s how my teacher told us.
touching aint it??
my whole class was invited to the dinner
kekek
so sweet
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no matter how sweet or sh.itty is the proposal, tat has nothing to do with wat kinda marriage u'll get....
wat matter most is how u end up growing old together.... -
I wanna grow old with my partner like my mom and dad.Originally posted by tare:no matter how sweet or sh.itty is the proposal, tat has nothing to do with wat kinda marriage u'll get....
wat matter most is how u end up growing old together....
They might not show their affections outwardly, but they've always stood united. They give each other lots of space, they trust each other a lot, and they go on vacations together quite often. They also joke and tease each other a lot... like a comic routine. hehehe!
Only thing is, I hope my partner will be more expressive. Imagine, if he's the reserved type, you might never hear him say 'I love you!' except during Christmas or Valentine's Day!
A bit more expressive, with a little bit of subtle PDA (Public Display of Affection) would be great! 
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PDAs evaporate like the morning dew.... given time, no matter how expressive, the "i love u" will only appear in cards printed by the manufacturers.... tat is IF u r lucky.... some dun even get the cards...Originally posted by Rhonda:I wanna grow old with my partner like my mom and dad. They might not show their affections outwardly, but they've always stood united. They give each other lots of space, they trust each other a lot, and they go on vacations together quite often. They also joke and tease each other a lot... like a comic routine. hehehe!
Only thing is, I hope my partner will be more expressive. Imagine, if he's the reserved type, you might never hear him say 'I love you!' except during Christmas or Valentine's Day! A bit more expressive, with a little bit of subtle PDA (Public Display of Affection) would be great!
tat's why when we see old couple holding hands, strolling along, it's soo touching... cos everyone hope and wish and dream they will end up the same, some day... -
u noe, i dun need to hear i love yous...Originally posted by tare:PDAs evaporate like the morning dew.... given time, no matter how expressive, the "i love u" will only appear in cards printed by the manufacturers.... tat is IF u r lucky.... some dun even get the cards...
tat's why when we see old couple holding hands, strolling along, it's soo touching... cos everyone hope and wish and dream they will end up the same, some day...
cos just by lookin at how protective he is of me, shows me perfectly just how important i am to him -
Depends on your partner, I guess. I've had boyfriends who always gave me that 'warm and fuzzy' feeling and who are very generous with hugs, holding hands and all that... and then, there are those who would be the quiet, steady type who will not say 'I love you' but will show their love by quietly working hard to try and give you a better life.Originally posted by tare:PDAs evaporate like the morning dew.... given time, no matter how expressive, the "i love u" will only appear in cards printed by the manufacturers.... tat is IF u r lucky.... some dun even get the cards...
tat's why when we see old couple holding hands, strolling along, it's soo touching... cos everyone hope and wish and dream they will end up the same, some day...
Ah well, sometimes, a toss of the dice and your fate is sealed! Sometimes, just gotta accept 'fate'! 
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Ah well, different strokes for different folks!Originally posted by shinta:u noe, i dun need to hear i love yous...
cos just by lookin at how protective he is of me, shows me perfectly just how important i am to him
I've read somewhere before that if you're a visual person, you should try and seek a visual partner. (ie. stimulated by things you SEE).
If you're an auditary person, ie. stimulated by things you HEAR or READ, then find a similar person as a partner because then, you'll both be on the same wavelength.
I guess that's why sometimes, you're just simply 'buay ngam' with someone, no matter what you do, what you say! And then, there are times when you meet someone new and you immediately clique and jive!
Elementary, my dear Watson... it's all elementary! -
Well Lingos, maybe your bf wants to share this happy moment with his family and it's likely he is already treating you as part of his family to want to share this moment with them. Maybe he didn't consider that you might feel pressured or embarressed with so many onlookers but if he treats you like family, he might overlook factors like these.Originally posted by Lingos:Goes like this....
You know he asked infront of his family right. For goodness sake, this guy cannot do anything without his parents or something.
Anyway he hid it in the bathroom. ..... everyone had their presents and i was the last to get mine from him. He runs off.. everyone is like.. yeah yeah a Gucci shopping bag, that's normal. Then I'm like.. WTF.
He struggled to say anything, he's like you know we've been together for a long time. (his mum and sister starts crying in excitement).. I'm thinking.. omg i didn't drive here, how can i get out.
Meanwhile his hands shake so much and you know how boutiques wrap their stuff up.. ribbons upon ribbons and lots of tissue packaged inside. The box was wrapped too and had another cardboard box. I'm like.. ripping it up myself cos he was shaking. And i opened the box.. and i said.. Oh no no no this ring is too small. I cannot wear it... maybe on my little finger.
As well, he is a guy. Most guys don't have a clue how much importance we girls put on the proposal. Have the both of you even talked about getting married and stuff like that? Have you hinted your expectations to him or is he the clueless kind who doesn't get any hints.
On a positive note, at least he attempted to surprise you although in your opinion it is a total fiasco. (Well in my opinion my proposal was a total fiasco too but we still have a good laugh over it )
I think you are a perfectionist and you expect everyone to be the same. This is my assumption so don't take it the wrong way. He sounds like a nice guy to us so far. He is afterall human and have his flaws. The perfect guy just don't exist! Also, if you are going to marry him, you will have to accept who he is and what he is. One cannot force our own expectations on another person because that would just turn them into someone else and it is likely they won't fit into the mould you expect and you will just end up feeling bitter about it. -
well tat's boyfriends mah....Originally posted by Rhonda:Depends on your partner, I guess. I've had boyfriends who always gave me that 'warm and fuzzy' feeling and who are very generous with hugs, holding hands and all that... and then, there are those who would be the quiet, steady type who will not say 'I love you' but will show their love by quietly working hard to try and give you a better life.
Ah well, sometimes, a toss of the dice and your fate is sealed! Sometimes, just gotta accept 'fate'!
i'm talking abt long term r/s... couples who have been together for decades.... -
I dunno Rhonda, sometimes it might be due to differences in expectations and not because you don't love the person, but because the expectation is this high, and the person only manages to deliver part of it that you get upset and put the person down.Originally posted by Rhonda:Actually, if you don't love him and keep putting him down, wouldn't it be better to break it off? Usually, people recall their proposal stories with glee but the tone here is definitely different.
In the long run, you and him, will be happier. Just my two cents' worth.
It can also be due to disappointment as well. -
My parents still joke around with each other and go on datesOriginally posted by tare:well tat's boyfriends mah....
i'm talking abt long term r/s... couples who have been together for decades.... -
See a lot of different types too!Originally posted by tare:well tat's boyfriends mah....
i'm talking abt long term r/s... couples who have been together for decades....
There's an elderly couple living in my mom's block... both white-haired already but still holding hands, walking slowly around the neighbourhood! Awwwwww...
There's also this elderly couple in my block, they don't hold hands, but they're always going here and there together, talking, discussing things, sounds quite business-like but it's their brand of intimacy and routine, and suddenly, one day, I see the uncle sitting on a bench, staring at nothing, looking soooooo desolate!
I thought, 'Oh dear God, please don't let his wife be dead or something like that!' Next few days, saw the uncle again twice... kept feeling worried and kept wanting to go up to him and check if he's alright. Third time I saw him, I buay tahan, this whole thing haunting me already, so I walked up to him, gave him a huge smile, 'Good morning, uncle!' then we started talking. I slowly brought up the subject of his wife... wah... like treading on glass cause not sure of the answer and his reaction... he said, 'oh, she's a Filipino-Chinese, she went back for her holidays, will be back a month later. I miss her!' PHEW!!! Not dead, not sick!! PHEW!!! I was getting soooo worried that uncle will get into depression! 
Now, his wife's back and I don't see him sitting alone at the bench for hours anymore.
Ah well, each of us have different levels of intimacy needs, I guess. We just need to find a partner who's likes the same stuff or is willing to meet us on middle ground, ie. compromise.
Like what elindra said, men are mostly clueless. I've learnt that when I tolerate until super buay tahan, I'll just say, 'Can you like hug me or not? A hug would be nice now!'. Usually, the blur guy will, 'Oh!' then big grin and a huge hug. Then, both will be happy! -
tat's sooo sweet........Originally posted by elindra:My parents still joke around with each other and go on dates
not many can do tat, ya noe.... -
Originally posted by Rhonda:Ah well, different strokes for different folks!
I've read somewhere before that if you're a visual person, you should try and seek a visual partner. (ie. stimulated by things you SEE).
If you're an auditary person, ie. stimulated by things you HEAR or READ, then find a similar person as a partner because then, you'll both be on the same wavelength.
I guess that's why sometimes, you're just simply 'buay ngam' with someone, no matter what you do, what you say! And then, there are times when you meet someone new and you immediately clique and jive!
Elementary, my dear Watson... it's all elementary! -
So sweetOriginally posted by BaByBoY:thou i`ve not gotten married
but i`ll like to share how my teacher got married
it`s really very romantic
my teacher and her then BF were steady for nearly 4 yrs before they tied the knot,
as it begins
my teacher always had a special craving for Mr Softee from 7/11
so one day, while my teacher wat out paktoring w her bf, the both of them passed by a 7/11 on the other side of the road,
suddenly, her bf asked her to stay there while he dashed across the road towards the 7/11.. somehow my teacher was rather stuck.. why did he run so fast??
minutes later, he came back w a cup of Mr Softee,
when her bf came back, she gave him a big pinch and it made him bruise on the left arm, for letting her wait there like a silly gal
but she felt really sweet that wat can back w him was the ice cream,
at least he rushed to buy for her
wat really melts her heart is the BIG diamond ring that she found when she almost finish her ice cream,
her bf simply kneel down and proposed to her` Jia gei wo ba!`
My teacher ran into tears,
tt`s how my teacher told us.
touching aint it??
my whole class was invited to the dinner
kekek -
wah....Originally posted by elindra:My parents still joke around with each other and go on dates -
Hehehe... mine too! Dad always teases mom and mom always goesOriginally posted by elindra:My parents still joke around with each other and go on dates 
. Now that brother is married and I've moved out, they always go on dinner dates and movie dates and vacations.
I wanna grow old with my partner and be like that too! -
Hoho my dad is always teasing my mum and she goesOriginally posted by Rhonda:Hehehe... mine too! Dad always teases mom and mom always goes . Now that brother is married and I've moved out, they always go on dinner dates and movie dates and vacations.
I wanna grow old with my partner and be like that too! too
But now that she is back to work because she feels bored at home, she teases him back and he will go 
They are always going out on dinner dates, movie dates and vacations now that both of us are grown up. They even go on self-development courses together.
I wanna grow old with my partner and be like that too!!!
It's like there is so much negativity about marriage lately that it is nice to see your own parents together and happy -
Originally posted by elindra:Hoho my dad is always teasing my mum and she goes too
But now that she is back to work because she feels bored at home, she teases him back and he will go
They are always going out on dinner dates, movie dates and vacations now that both of us are grown up. They even go on self-development courses together.
I wanna grow old with my partner and be like that too!!!
It's like there is so much negativity about marriage lately that it is nice to see your own parents together and happy -
Originally posted by elindra:Hoho my dad is always teasing my mum and she goes too
But now that she is back to work because she feels bored at home, she teases him back and he will go
They are always going out on dinner dates, movie dates and vacations now that both of us are grown up. They even go on self-development courses together.
I wanna grow old with my partner and be like that too!!!
It's like there is so much negativity about marriage lately that it is nice to see your own parents together and happy -
am i too young to gt married. i'm 23+++. my bf is 24..