Club 30's "Kill the Boredom Demon" Jive Pad, 18th Edition
-
the pressure.. the pressure!
i'll think about the tagline soon.. coz all my braincells have been zapped at work here..
still thinking.. how can one section of 4 people churn out so much pointless nonsense and cause so much paperwork for no gain whatsoever??
and because my division boss seems pathologically unable to send in nil returns, i have never had to write so much BS for a nil return in my life... how do i generate 3 paragraphs to say "nil returns" -
wat is nil returns ha?
-
Easy. Just go into needless detail while stating the blindingly obvious. You can write an entire paper on it.Originally posted by the Bear:the pressure.. the pressure!
... how do i generate 3 paragraphs to say "nil returns" -
some other section requesting if we have anything to add to some giant BS paper which is being generated for no reason other than to make the asswipes on high feel important...
we have nothing to add to it...
my division head doesn't like that we have nothing to say.. so now, i have to have a lot of "nothing to say" to write down... -
if i could do that, i'd be in with Strategic Planning lotOriginally posted by av98m:Easy. Just go into needless detail while stating the blindingly obvious. You can write an entire paper on it.
-
How about..
'the part about () is very thoughtprovoking and well included'
'You might want to double check the numbers on ( )'
'The impact on this point ( ) would be satisfactory'
'para (), line () is that right?'
'Other than the above, great paper, nothing else to add!' -
i think i will write it tomorrow.. using words like "leverage", "take cognizance", "strategic impact" and "purpose and results-driven"
you know... the BS and meaningless words senior management are in lurve with...
i may be commissioning some rubber stamps soon...
these...
-
Well just read the BS paper and make some armchair observations and suggestions lor. Hell, people on internet forums do that all the time, posting loads of BS on topics they know nothing about. I'm also guilty of that.
-
Or he can be totally abrasive and comment on the grammar and spelling. Punctuation too.Originally posted by ShrodingersCat:How about..
'the part about () is very thoughtprovoking and well included'
'You might want to double check the numbers on ( )'
'The impact on this point ( ) would be satisfactory'
'para (), line () is that right?'
'Other than the above, great paper, nothing else to add!'
I actually do that -
I like the one pinky bear posted. Just 2 words on the stamp:Originally posted by the Bear:i think i will write it tomorrow.. using words like "leverage", "take cognizance", "strategic impact" and "purpose and results-driven"
you know... the BS and meaningless words senior management are in lurve with...
i may be commissioning some rubber stamps soon...
these...
F U C K IT -
not worth the trouble leh.
so much effort........ when u probably dont care abt the paper to begin with...
i dont know.. cos never work in civil svc or very big companies, never had to read papers.. aside from newspapers la... -
One of the reasons why they like to get practically everyone's input is, so that if the bigshots hate the paper or there is some cockup, the blame is spread over more people.Originally posted by ShrodingersCat:not worth the trouble leh.
so much effort........ when u probably dont care abt the paper to begin with...
i dont know.. cos never work in civil svc or very big companies, never had to read papers.. aside from newspapers la...
Also, sometimes they get "scapegoats" to write papers on subjects they know nothing about. So the poor scapegoat has to chase the very people who should be writing the damned paper to begin with, for inputs.
I'm not kidding. This really happens. -
no no.. we're supposed to provide the information for them to write the BS paper
-
there goes my tax....
oh.. i havent been earning enough to pay tax... so i guess that's ok.. maybe next year I'll start lambasting about tax payer $$$ when I start paying some
hurhurhurhur
Stupid la really.. need 1 million people to do one thing. if govt really function like a MNC.. the losses will be... profound.
i.e. sentosa. -
Wahhh I go away for a meeting and I miss so many pages
Bear I can walk over to your office and relief you of your chocolates.
Hmmm for your banner and avatar...I suggest changing them into broccolis. This should make you lose your appetite -
-mournfully-
but i like broccolis... with cheese.. oooh yumyum
broccolis with cream mushroom sauce too.. oooh yumyummmm -
Yes you have. You've been paying plenty.Originally posted by ShrodingersCat:there goes my tax....
oh.. i havent been earning enough to pay tax...
GST, ERP, Road Tax, Radio & TV license etc etc
-
EVILOriginally posted by elindra:Wahhh I go away for a meeting and I miss so many pages
Bear I can walk over to your office and relief you of your chocolates.
Hmmm for your banner and avatar...I suggest changing them into broccolis. This should make you lose your appetite
How was Muthu's Curry? -
OH YEAH! Those insidious people... thanks for reminding meOriginally posted by av98m:Yes you have. You've been paying plenty.
GST, ERP, Road Tax, Radio & TV license etc etc
OEI MY TAX MONEY SHOULDNT BE SPEND THIS WAY!! -
broccoli is evil
*$&#% it!
i'm going home.. i'll let the BS generator recharge for an assault on this thing tomorrow -
u need to neutralise broccoli with suitable fattening sauce.. then it will taste great.. like cream sauce or cheese sauce.... yumyum
-
Same here. Going home.
-
It's not as spicy as I think it would beOriginally posted by av98m:EVIL
How was Muthu's Curry?
In fact I think there are more chinese and ang mos there than indians
It was ok. I didn't get sick or indigestion
Working late tonight
-
See? I told you they neutered the dishesOriginally posted by elindra:It's not as spicy as I think it would be
In fact I think there are more chinese and ang mos there than indians
It was ok. I didn't get sick or indigestion
Working late tonight 
-
Imagination helps.Originally posted by the Bear:if i could do that, i'd be in with Strategic Planning lot
uhmm...
okay - forget I said anything.