Marriage Breakup... Seeking Advise
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Hi, I chanced upon this forum, and decided to open up my heart here.
I met my wife 9 years, and we got married 4 years ago. We were quite happily married, but I was hiding a dark secret from her, I was heavily in debt from stock market losses. My debts were rising quickly, till I had problems servicing it. Out of desperation, I took out some loans in my wife's name (means forging her signature). But no matter how hard I worked, never seemed to clear them.
In Oct this year, I finally had enough. I came clean about my debts. My wife was shocked. What was worse was that she found out I forged her signature before I can tell her. She was livid. She packed her bags and left home 2 weeks later.
It's been 2 months since she left home. She has told me that it is impossible for her to trust anyone again, and I have wasted her youth, and destroyed her dreams. She mentioned that we are finished.
I had apologised to her, her parents and have sought for forgiveness. That was the only thing I did wrong in the last 9 years, and i really regretted it. I only committed the folly out of desperation. Why can't she forgive me?
Also, she said that there was no chance for us to get back together, yet she is not taking any actions to serve me the divorce petition.. why is that so? Could that mean that there is a ray of hope for me?
I love her too dearly to let her go, but I know she has been hurt terribly. What can I do to remedy this situation?
I hope for some sincere sharing here...
Many thanks. -
the bar...of all places
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dun quite get you...Originally posted by poon cho tang:the bar...of all places -
You should post in AA and not Bar.
http://www.sgforums.com/?action=forum_display&forum_id=12
Forging her signature and using her name to get loans is really serious.
Haiz.. -
take this opportunity to strengthen your relationship..Originally posted by regularjoe:Hi, I chanced upon this forum, and decided to open up my heart here.
I met my wife 9 years, and we got married 4 years ago. We were quite happily married, but I was hiding a dark secret from her, I was heavily in debt from stock market losses. My debts were rising quickly, till I had problems servicing it. Out of desperation, I took out some loans in my wife's name (means forging her signature). But no matter how hard I worked, never seemed to clear them.
In Oct this year, I finally had enough. I came clean about my debts. My wife was shocked. What was worse was that she found out I forged her signature before I can tell her. She was livid. She packed her bags and left home 2 weeks later.
It's been 2 months since she left home. She has told me that it is impossible for her to trust anyone again, and I have wasted her youth, and destroyed her dreams. She mentioned that we are finished.
I had apologised to her, her parents and have sought for forgiveness. That was the only thing I did wrong in the last 9 years, and i really regretted it. I only committed the folly out of desperation. Why can't she forgive me?
Also, she said that there was no chance for us to get back together, yet she is not taking any actions to serve me the divorce petition.. why is that so? Could that mean that there is a ray of hope for me?
I love her too dearly to let her go, but I know she has been hurt terribly. What can I do to remedy this situation?
I hope for some sincere sharing here...
Many thanks.
only broken things are made to be stronger...
cheer up.. you can do it..
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Oh... so sorry, new here... can this be shifted to the AA site? Or I need to create a new thread there...Originally posted by LilO gIrL:You should post in AA and not Bar.
http://www.sgforums.com/?action=forum_display&forum_id=12
Forging her signature and using her name to get loans is really serious.
Haiz..
Thanks. -
It is difficult for her to trust someone who lied to her for 9 years. Made worse when u forged her signature to obtain loans.
I suggest u better think of a honest way to repay what u have owned, especially the one you borrow in her name. -
create another one i guess. U will see gd advice in AA but not Bar.Originally posted by regularjoe:Oh... so sorry, new here... can this be shifted to the AA site? Or I need to create a new thread there...
Thanks. -
1st thing 1st, clear all e debt under her name
then go beg her lor -
i simply think that yr wife dont love u enough...
what happens to those vow - thru thick and thin?
i'll say forget abt her,she fail the test. -
I think what yr wife should do right now is to work together with u a plan to clear all yr debts. She can be angry with u later... wat can be worst than divorce... I dun think she will do that. She's juz lost in her direction. Give her some time and be patient with her pls.
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Hmm.. Okay. Put yourself in her shoes and what will you see?Originally posted by regularjoe:Hi, I chanced upon this forum, and decided to open up my heart here.
I met my wife 9 years, and we got married 4 years ago. We were quite happily married, but I was hiding a dark secret from her, I was heavily in debt from stock market losses. My debts were rising quickly, till I had problems servicing it. Out of desperation, I took out some loans in my wife's name (means forging her signature). But no matter how hard I worked, never seemed to clear them.
In Oct this year, I finally had enough. I came clean about my debts. My wife was shocked. What was worse was that she found out I forged her signature before I can tell her. She was livid. She packed her bags and left home 2 weeks later.
It's been 2 months since she left home. She has told me that it is impossible for her to trust anyone again, and I have wasted her youth, and destroyed her dreams. She mentioned that we are finished.
I had apologised to her, her parents and have sought for forgiveness. That was the only thing I did wrong in the last 9 years, and i really regretted it. I only committed the folly out of desperation. Why can't she forgive me?
Also, she said that there was no chance for us to get back together, yet she is not taking any actions to serve me the divorce petition.. why is that so? Could that mean that there is a ray of hope for me?
I love her too dearly to let her go, but I know she has been hurt terribly. What can I do to remedy this situation?
I hope for some sincere sharing here...
Many thanks.
"My husband does not share his bundle with me."
"My husband resort to underhand methods just to get things right.. while still chooses not to share with me."
"Is his love for me fake too? I can't tell the diff."
"He puts me in risk for his own selfish reasons."
"etc.."
Betrayal can take seconds to take place... while trust needs time to build up. Face the consequences, be it regret or remorse, you bring it upon yourself.
You can only hope for her forgiveness.. and whatever you are doing.. goodluck. -
yeh, should post in AA
here in BAR..the answer you get is....
she gonna divoce you...you can afford to pay or not since you are so heavily in debt -
the reply you going to get over @ bar is
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but y u wan to forge her signature instead of asking for her consent? is she very fierce?
but u already have enuf to clear up the mess ... quite responsible of u also.. think she will forgive u ,juz need some time..
good luck to you. -
Sorry everyone, I have already migrated this thread to AA...
Thanks for all the advises and good wishes... some of you have given very gd insights...
Please continue to have your beer...