The Electric New Paper :
SEX ADDICTION IN SINGAPORE
DOC: WORRYING TREND THAT CAN LEAD TO CRIME
DR Munidasa Winslow sees one sex addict a month but thinks this is only the tip of the inferno.
By Ng Wan Ching
20 June 2005
DR Munidasa Winslow sees one sex addict a month but thinks this is only the tip of the inferno.
And such addiction can lead to devastating consequences, including crime.
Dr Winslow is a senior consultant psychiatrist and director of the Community Addictions Management Programme (Camp) in the Institute of Mental Health.
As with any appetite, he said, it can get excessive and unnatural.
For example, a teenage boy came to see him recently for addiction to Internet porn, saying he was thinking of progressing to touching girls on the bus.
'We had to be very clear with him about the consequences if he ever did something like that,' said Dr Winslow.
That is also an example of how with the Internet, the problem has flared up even more, adding feul to the already active flames.
Said Dr Winslow: 'Think of all the spam that you get. There are people out there who are sending out porn messages every day. It's very lucrative. You send out 10 million messages and if only half a per cent of the people respond, you've got 50,000 customers.
'Sex is huge in Singapore and the rest of Asia. Just go to any of these red light areas and you can see how much business is being done,' said Dr Winslow.
With pornography so readily available, a sex addict can easily feed his addiction which may lead to very serious consequences.
Said Dr Winslow: 'Many of the patients who come to see me have either been caught by family members behaving in unacceptable ways or who knows he is not behaving correctly.'
For every sex addict he sees, he knows there are many more he does not see and who may not even realise they have a problem.
He recalled seeing some patients who were so obsessed with sex they would do it with their spouse a few times in a day, then head out to have more sex with prostitutes or masturbate with stimulation from pornography.
Dr Tan Soo Teng, a consultant psychiatrist at Gleneagles Medical Centre, agrees. He sees sex addicts once in a while.
Said Dr Tan: 'Many of them get into trouble with the law first. When the police tells them to see a psychiatrist, they come to me.
'But what we see is only a very small percentage.'
Dr Winslow is concerned enough to list sex as one of the four behavioural addictions in the Camp website.
Internet addiction is also listed there.
There are five subtypes to Internet addiction among which sex and love are featured:
# Cybersex addiction (compulsive use of adult web sites for cybersex and cyberporn);
# Cyber-relationship addiction (over-involvement in online relationships).
Sex addiction is also often accompanied by other sorts of addiction such as drugs or alcohol.
Like all addictions, sex addiction is handled on many different levels.
12-STEP RECOVERY PROGRAMME
Dr Winslow works with the Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous group here and uses the 12-step programme to help his patients.
Based on the Alcoholics Anonymous model, the programme emphasises the need for an addict to admit to powerlessness.
Then, after intense soul-searching and admission of wrong-doing, they are encouraged to seek guidance from a higher power through prayer or meditation.
For most addictions, total abstinence is the cure. But this does not apply to sex.
'We have to teach the sex addict how to regain control of his life.
'We make them understand what they are doing, be it using it as a stress relief or for other reasons,' said Dr Winslow.
WHAT IS SEX ADDICTION?
LIKE an alcoholic unable to resist drinking, sex addicts are unable to stop their self-destructive sexual behavior.
The majority grow up in families in which addiction already flourished, including alcoholism, compulsive eating, and compulsive gambling.
Most grapple with other addictions as well, but they find sex addiction the most difficult to stop.
Sex addiction is defined as any sexually-related, compulsive behavior which interferes with normal living and causes severe stress on family, friends, loved ones, and one's work.
According to Dr Patrick Carnes who wrote the book, Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction, there are three levels of sex addiction:
# Level 1 - acting out, a pattern of out-of-control sexual behavior which may include compulsive masturbation; indulging in pornography; having multiple affairs; exhibitionism; dangerous sexual practices; prostitution or going to prostitutes; casual sex with strangers; compulsive sexual episodes, voyeurism and other fetishistic behaviour;
# Level 2 - experiencing severe consequences due to sexual behaviour and an inability to stop despite these adverse consequences such as loss of job, loss of spouse and family, loss of career opportunities, suicide attempts, exposure to Aids and other sexually transmitted diseases;
# Level 3 - persistent pursuit of self-destructive behaviour where even the understanding that the consequences of their actions will be painful or have dire consequences will not stop them.
This is the 'must have sex by hook or by crook' stage which may lead some to commit crimes such as molest and rape.
Said Dr Winslow: 'Most of the sex addicts I see are level 1 and 2 addicts.
'There are a couple of level 3 addicts who I see in the newspapers now and then.'