Cheating wife drops bombshell about daugthers in custody battle: They are not your kids
By Tan Ooi Boon
HE took his wife to court as she was having an affair with her boss. But on the first day of the initial hearing at the Family Court, the wife dropped a bombshell - she declared that the two older children were not her husband's and that they were fathered by a former lover.
That revelation caught everyone in the courtroom by surprise.
The judge, Mrs Koh Juat Jong, and the husband's lawyer then asked her why she did not come clean earlier.
Her reply: She never thought of revealing this to anyone as she always assumed that all the children would be with her.
'Such things were not appropriate to tell,' she said, and that she only raised it as a last resort.
On the witness stand later, she said her first child was conceived by artificial insemination using her lover's sperm. No reason was given why this was done.
But the second child was conceived the natural way with the same man. The court also heard that she had started seeing him three years after her marriage in 1991 and that the affair lasted two years. There was no dispute that the son was fathered by the husband.
He is a director of a top international company here while the wife is a manager of another equally well-known company.
Before the break-up, she had an affair with her boss, her husband alleged. She did not contest that.
She has since left to join her current company.
There was no contest to the split and the Chinese Singaporean couple, who are in their 40s, agreed to divide their substantial matrimonial assets, with no maintenance to the wife.
But things started to get stormy when the couple were asked to decide on the fate of their three children - two daughters, aged 9 and 7, and their son, 6, in the initial hearing in July 2002.
Both of them want custody badly and are ready to go for an all-out legal battle, all the way to Singapore's highest court.
After the shock announcement in the Family Court, the case had to be adjourned for the couple to file further evidence.
The court later also made orders to withhold all parties' names. So husband and wife were referred to as AD and AE respectively, while their three children became X, Y and C.
The husband took the news calmly. His position was that it would not matter even if the two girls are not his biological children, and that he would still fight for their custody.
He declined to go for a DNA test to find out the truth. Despite this, the wife proceeded to ask the Singapore Health Science Authority to conduct a test on all the three children.
The DNA report later confirmed that the two girls are full siblings, but the boy is their step-brother.
POLICE REPORTS
That wasn't the only issue which erupted during the custody battle.
The wife later made a police report alleging that the husband took photographs of the girls while they were in the shower.
The allegation was strongly denied by the husband, who in turned lodged his own police report, accusing the wife of filing a false report to malign him.
In coming to her decision on the custody, District Judge Tan Peck Cheng noted that she had no doubt that both the husband and the wife love the children.
'They had fought long and hard to try to gain custody, care and control of them,' she said in her written judgment.
But DJ Tan noted that ultimately, the court's paramount consideration would be the kids' welfare, not their parents' wishes.
Before she came to her decision, she took time to talk to all three children. They were able to indicate very clearly their wishes.
'The two girls are clearly confused and greatly affected by the revelation that the husband is not their biological father and this has affected the father-child relationship,' she said.
CUSTODY TO MOTHER
Having considered all the factors, she felt that it would be in the girls' best interest to grant custody to their mother, with no access to the husband.
'I believe this would also be in the interest of the husband as there is no assurance that there would not be any allegations against him, like that of the shower incident,' she said.
As for the boy, the judge considered his wishes and his close bonding with his father, and granted custody to his father, but with access to the mother.
Apart from the custody order, DJ Tan also wanted the wife to ensure that the two girls would be sent for counselling to deal with their new identities.
Despite such orders, the couple have not given up their battle royal for the children.
An appeal on the custody issue is still pending.
Long custody battle bad for child, says court
SOON after the Family Court gave its ruling, the wife filed an appeal to the High Court because she was unhappy that the custody of her son was given to the husband.
But there was a 49-day delay in serving the notice of the appeal on the husband. As the notice was not served within the 14 days, the appeal lapsed.
The wife, however, went to the High Court to ask for special permission so that her appeal can still proceed.
While the court rules bar an appeal when procedures are not followed, Justice Choo Han Teck allowed the wife's application.
In his ruling, he said he should let the appeal proceed because it concerned the welfare of a child.
The husband, however, appealed against Justice Choo's ruling and the case went to the Court of Appeal.
APPEAL JUDGES' DECISION
Judge of Appeal (JA) Chao Hick Tin and Justice Tan Lee Meng, who heard the case, recently acknowledged Justice Choo's reasons for allowing the appeal to proceed.
However, they felt that the buck had to stop somewhere.
So they did not allow the wife's appeal to continue.
In child custody proceedings, JA Chao noted it is important that the case be settled as soon as possible.
'A child should be allowed to get on with his life with the parent whom the court has awarded custody.
Uncertainty will not be in the interest of the child,' he said.
If the court were to allow parents have more time to file custody appeals, this would undermine the objective of judicial rules and also be unsettling for the children.
'As far as possible, the court should ensure that there is stability in a child's life, even in the situation of a broken home,' the judge said.
But it's not the end of the custody battle. The husband has filed his own appeals against the wife and these will go on later this year.
He is unhappy that he is not given access to the girls. On his son, his complaint is that the access given to the wife is too much.
SOurce: NP
