Can anyone help me? I'm very upset...
-
Thread closed,thanks to everyone's comment and advice and also scolding.
I handle myself. -
Haiz
ZHUO YOU WEI NAN -
I may seem too young to give you advice... But i think you should just follow your heart cos it is what I think you should do... If you think that waiting for her is worth it and that you really like her that much... Just do it.
But let me tell you something about decisions made in relationships... Do not get your hopes too high... When things do not go right in relationships... It will eat up your heart if you are really put too much effort in it... Relationships are not like other things where you will most likely reap gains if you put in effort... do things with an open mind... And do not expect anything in return... It may be hard to do so but I think that this is the best mentality to handle the situation cos people do change, some for the better, some for the worst.
Hope my advice helps. -
Sorrie to say this but to be a successful singer in singapore wif fans waiting under ur block seems rather impossible.
-
Every one got their dreams to pursue... should let her lar... we oni live life once... honestly i do regret not chasing my dream of being a hair stylist and now I am doing something I dun really enjoy to earn my bread and butter... quite tong ku
If you love her, let her chase her dreams lor...
If she stuck by you even aft she's famous, she's yrs
If she doesn't, It was never meant to be...
Couples should be able to stand the test of time... In marriage vows, it's thru thick and thin, thru happiness and sadness.. if you can be supportive, both will be happy lor...
Think about it... -
-
Everyone have dreams to succeed...but prohibit those to be well-known. like modeling,actress and singers....Originally posted by my_name_is_Natasha:Every one got their dreams to pursue... should let her lar... we oni live life once... honestly i do regret not chasing my dream of being a hair stylist and now I am doing something I dun really enjoy to earn my bread and butter... quite tong ku
If you love her, let her chase her dreams lor...
If she stuck by you even aft she's famous, she's yrs
If she doesn't, It was never meant to be...
Couples should be able to stand the test of time... In marriage vows, it's thru thick and thin, thru happiness and sadness.. if you can be supportive, both will be happy lor...
Think about it...
There won't be much privacy for the both of us...
I just wish to have normal life...have career..have family..have children...stable life,that's all i want.. -
In Bar?
-
I think ppl here will have more kinda experience(no offend,very sorry).Originally posted by Ayukat:In Bar?
might help me solve...i'll feel more comfortable when i know there's still ppl out there to help...
Maybe something from u all may help me look wide... -
this very 1st paragraph tells a lot why ur gf chose to break up with you... on one hand u prohibit her to sing, on the other hand you have appeared to be selfish cos u wan to have fun like last time very logical reasons for breaking up cos it seems you are a control freak...Originally posted by ^Sankawa^:Been 3 years...my gf gotta leave me cos she loves singing.She's trying to be a singer,she has talent and the enforcement to do it.I know she can do it one day...3 years relationships just defeated by singing. I prohibit her to sing cos i don't want her to be a singer in future.Cos if she does,we can't be able to go out and have fun like last time we used to be...or even don't have the chance.
the remainder of your post juz echos wat i've said, rather than genuinely caring for her, it seems like you are more concerned of your personal interests of what u can get out of her...
another thing, if you truely love and care for her, rather than prohibiting (singing is nothing wrong, not like prostitution or selling drugs unless she sings in those sleazy places), you ought to support her... if not, it is a very big flashpoint in the relationship, and ultimately, even if u 2 get married, a divorce is probably on the cards... even if she changes herself for u i can tell tat she's not going to be happy which means the marraige may not be a happy one...
hao hao fan xin ba (reflect on your actions and wat i said carefully) -
-
i have not heard her point so i can't comment sorryOriginally posted by ^Sankawa^:Thanks...I know i'm selfish. But i've think of many outcome.
Since that i'm selfish,why not saying she's selfish too? do what she like to do not care about me..
I declare that fun is happiness going out play,shopping,just like normal couples do.
I always admit to her that i'm not always right and i did apologise..whats the importance of singing? Whats the outcome? If i follow her in..what happen if she put in too much on singing?
Well she leave as well? Love someone must let her do what she wants? Why not saying she loves me she must let me do what i want??
Why is this so unfair?
guys need love too ,will feel unsecure too...
(just a thread,hope you don't misunderstand,my point of it,can still share your opinion,thanks alot and sorry.)
anyway the 2 of u should have worked out a compromise if both side can't compromise then it's the end of the relationship... she has left most likely cos you hold your selfish views on the relationship while she wishes to hold onto her dreams which u forbade...
another reason y i have not said she's selfish yet cos she's holding onto her dreams, while u r holding onto wat u wan (out of her?) in the relationship... -
hmm.. you know, marraige is the union of 2 bodies into one. instead of saying "I" and "You" its a "We". u should be sensitive to her needs and her dreams, and she should be sensitive to your needs and dreams.
now, you are only concerned about yourself.. your needs. how are you gonna survive marraige if you remain like this?
being able to have fun together is good, but its no basis for a good lasting relationship. when bad times come between you 2, having fun isn't going to help much.
you certainly have alot of growing up to do..
i last time also face the same problem, a girl i loved, her dream was to be a missionary, that would mean travelling, dangers and so on and so forth.
but its something she really wants to do, i have no right to say no, its not like she's doing something wrong. i have to give her my support and encouragement, any way i can. -
And you need advice yourself after writing this? Why don't you use this as your mantra?Originally posted by Superdude2004:I may seem too young to give you advice... But i think you should just follow your heart cos it is what I think you should do... If you think that waiting for her is worth it and that you really like her that much... Just do it.
But let me tell you something about decisions made in relationships... Do not get your hopes too high... When things do not go right in relationships... It will eat up your heart if you are really put too much effort in it... Relationships are not like other things where you will most likely reap gains if you put in effort... do things with an open mind... And do not expect anything in return... It may be hard to do so but I think that this is the best mentality to handle the situation cos people do change, some for the better, some for the worst.
Hope my advice helps. -
Thanks to all of you...
-
Did you watch spiderman2 the movie?
This is a few quote he say:
"With great power come great responsibility"
"With great intelligence is to use to help mankind"
"Sometimes to do what is right, we have to let go of what we want including our dream"
What a great quote?
Think about it~
-
You know what, YOU DON'T LOVE HER!!!Originally posted by ^Sankawa^:Everyone have dreams to succeed...but prohibit those to be well-known. like modeling,actress and singers....
There won't be much privacy for the both of us...
I just wish to have normal life...have career..have family..have children...stable life,that's all i want..
You only care about what you want, you never care about what she wants. Yes you want a normal life, but she may not, but you don't care. If you love someone, you have to embrace what she loves. You got to be a bigger man here. Or else she will leave you no matter what. Because both of you want different things in life, and you alone have never thought about compromising. At least she still try to balance between you and her dreams, and you? You only care about yourself. -
aint u afraid if ur gf going into the entertainment world, she may be seduced by the handsome and rich ppl in there? if she enter it u will get less chance to meet her and the relationship will suffer cos u get to see her less and others will chen xu er ru...
i think this is one of the understatement reasons u dun want her to be a singer....
probably the only thing u can do now is support her decision. its not a easy task to be a singer... not only able to sing and a pretty face can make it. ppl mostly see the glamourous side of being a celebrity but never the darker side of it...
ur post is giving me the impression that u have no faith in ur gf n urself, that she will surely change heart if she succeed in being a singer.
Have faith... if its true love u both have for each other, ur love can stand this test. -
Thanks,i know.Originally posted by FreeToFly:You know what, YOU DON'T LOVE HER!!!
You only care about what you want, you never care about what she wants. Yes you want a normal life, but she may not, but you don't care. If you love someone, you have to embrace what she loves. You got to be a bigger man here. Or else she will leave you no matter what. Because both of you want different things in life, and you alone have never thought about compromising. At least she still try to balance between you and her dreams, and you? You only care about yourself.
You're right in the 2nd paragraph
Wrong ,I do love her very much!
But in different ways,maybe a wrong way. Cos she kept complaining and stressed on her part time jobs because of politics...i also worry that she will have more politics in entainment life. I don't want her to suffer. Maybe i try to get her back,let her try then see.
If can't get her back i also no choice.at least i've to regain,no regrets... -
Love is not about how much you miss her, is not about how happy you are with her, is not about how sad you get when she leaves you, is not about how bad you want her, is about what you can do for her, is about how strong you can behold at times of adversity, at times when the passion quiets down, at times when she grows old and ugly, at times when she becomes sick and cannot attend to you. Love is not just about feelings, is about belief, is about strength, is about will, is about commitment, is about compromise, and....love is a choice.Originally posted by ^Sankawa^:Thanks,i know.
You're right in the 2nd paragraph
Wrong ,I do love her very much!
But in different ways,maybe a wrong way. Cos she kept complaining and stressed on her part time jobs because of politics...i also worry that she will have more politics in entainment life. I don't want her to suffer. Maybe i try to get her back,let her try then see.
If can't get her back i also no choice.at least i've to regain,no regrets... -
Why don't you just let it run its course?
-
Ya, they got experiece alright... License of Buaying.Originally posted by ^Sankawa^:I think ppl here will have more kinda experience(no offend,very sorry).
might help me solve...i'll feel more comfortable when i know there's still ppl out there to help...
Maybe something from u all may help me look wide...
-
That's what i'm thinking...Originally posted by Axelheat755:aint u afraid if ur gf going into the entertainment world, she may be seduced by the handsome and rich ppl in there? if she enter it u will get less chance to meet her and the relationship will suffer cos u get to see her less and others will chen xu er ru...
i think this is one of the understatement reasons u dun want her to be a singer....
probably the only thing u can do now is support her decision. its not a easy task to be a singer... not only able to sing and a pretty face can make it. ppl mostly see the glamourous side of being a celebrity but never the darker side of it...
ur post is giving me the impression that u have no faith in ur gf n urself, that she will surely change heart if she succeed in being a singer.
Have faith... if its true love u both have for each other, ur love can stand this test.
Anyway,it's happy to be loved,but pain to love... -
sigh...
-
You only get to live once, so does your gf. Why not let her pursue her dreams?
Not only that, if she has a wonderful singing voice, why deprive the masses the joy of hearing it?