A guy gets home late one night and his wife says, Where the hell have
you been?
I was out getting a tattoo.
A tattoo? What kind of tattoo did you get?
I got a hundred dollar bill on my penis.
What the hell were you thinking? Why did you get a hundred dollar bill
on your penis?
Well, one, I like to watch my money grow.
Two, once in a while, I like to play with my money.
Three, I like how money feels in my hand .
And lastly, instead of you going out shopping, you can stay right here
at home and blow a hundred bucks anytime you want!!!