I Will Survive (Sang to Gloria Gaynor's I Will Survive)
At first I was afraid,
I was petrified,
When you said you had 10 inches
Lord I almost died,
But I'd spent oh so many years
just waiting for a man that long,
That I Grew strong,
And I knew that I could take you on. . .
But there you are,
Another lie,
I was ready for a big mac
and you've bought me a French fry,
I should have known that it was bullsh*t,
Just a sad pathetic dream,
Should have known there was no anaconda lurking in those jeans.
Go on now go,
Walk out the door,
Don't you promise me 10 inches
then turn up with only 4,
Weren't you a prat to think I wouldn't catch you out,
Don't you know we' re only joking when we say size doesn't count.
(Chorus)
I will survive,
I will survive,
Cos as long as I have batteries,
My sex life is gonna thrive,
I will always have good sex
with a handful of latex,
I will survive,
I will survive. . .hey . hey
It took all my self control
not to laugh out loud,
When I saw your little weiner
standing tall and proud,
But to hell with all your ego's
and to hell with all your needs,
Now I'm saving all my lovin
for a cordless multispeed,
Go on now go,
Just Make a dash,
Last time I saw a prick that small was watching Gladstone run nude hash,
I should have asked for confirmation,
Should've asked for referees,
Then I wouldn't have you waving that wee winky thing at me.
Go on now go,
Just hit the track,
Don't you bring me home no tiddlers,
Cos I'll always throw them back,
The only thing that I could do with a prick as small as yours,
Is to stick it with a tooth pick &
Dip it in tomato sauce.
(Chorus)
I will survive,
I will survive,
Cos as long as I have batteries,
My sex life is gonna thrive,
I will always have good sex
with a handful of latex,
I will survive,
I will survive. . .hey . hey
Go on now go,
Out of my sight,
I'm going back to my appliance,
Cos I know it's length is right,
And if I ever see your tiny tockley knockin' at my door,
You'll be counting up your inches
as you pick 'em off the floor.
Go on now Go!
gimmie some tanned females, asian chicks!