Does parent have a say in whom you are dating?
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I don't know...I am scared to run away from home...Originally posted by shinta:my mom does that all the time.. and when she does, i'd shed a couple of tears in front of her... ( i dun usually cry or shed tears
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den run away from home
kinda stupid for a 21 year old to still be doin that
Maybe when I already start working I would dare to do it more...but when I was still dependent on them financially, I don't even dare to walk out from the house for a day...that's why they took advantage of this fear of mine and my inability to fend for myself at that time...
Even if I could run away in a year or two when I have had my own career, I will still feel guilty. And I do want to have my parents' blessings when it comes to things like this... -
these "flaws", they can't be that bad can't they?Originally posted by rainee:They want a "perfect" man for me, but they have yet to accept the fact that nobody is perfect. I love him but I can see that he is not perfect but I have learned to accept his flaws, but I don't know if my parents can...
i mean, i'm sure your parents know no one's perfect('cept me ^^). each time your mommmy scolds your daddy, or vice versa, it means that he/she has made a mistake and the other party gets upset.
if that's the main problem, which i think is not, then ask your parents to look at each other to see if what they see is what they call "perfect". -
That's the thing...my mom alwaays told me that my Dad is not perfect, therefore she wants to make sure I marry someone who is perfect so that i don't have to go through what she went through...Originally posted by tut4nkh4m3n:these "flaws", they can't be that bad can't they?
i mean, i'm sure your parents know no one's perfect('cept me ^^). each time your mommmy scolds your daddy, or vice versa, it means that he/she has made a mistake and the other party gets upset.
if that's the main problem, which i think is not, then ask your parents to look at each other to see if what they see is what they call "perfect".
I do not think he has any serious flaw, just that my parents are overly concerned and picky...
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hmm...Originally posted by rainee:I don't know...I am scared to run away from home...
Maybe when I already start working I would dare to do it more...but when I was still dependent on them financially, I don't even dare to walk out from the house for a day...that's why they took advantage of this fear of mine and my inability to fend for myself at that time...
Even if I could run away in a year or two when I have had my own career, I will still feel guilty. And I do want to have my parents' blessings when it comes to things like this...
when u've got a job... u could do that
until then, keep this from them
well, they will give their blessings...when they realise that they are gg to lose their only dotter -
One part of me wants to share my happiness...but then another part of me prevents me from doing so...Originally posted by shinta:hmm...
when u've got a job... u could do that
until then, keep this from them
well, they will give their blessings...when they realise that they are gg to lose their only dotter
I guess I would have to fight for my own happiness...I don't like this idea...haiz... 
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hmm...Originally posted by rainee:That's the thing...my mom alwaays told me that my Dad is not perfect, therefore she wants to make sure I marry someone who is perfect so that i don't have to go through what she went through...
I do not think he has any serious flaw, just that my parents are overly concerned and picky...
its not about lovin a perfect person.. its about lookin at an imperfect person perfectly..
like nel... he may not be the most perfect person in this world, but in my eyes, he's perfect, close to flawless
the only flaw he has would be....
hmm....
food can wait but work or games couldn... he'd get gastric pain one day if he goes on like this...
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oh my god.Originally posted by rainee:That's the thing...my mom alwaays told me that my Dad is not perfect, therefore she wants to make sure I marry someone who is perfect so that i don't have to go through what she went through...
I do not think he has any serious flaw, just that my parents are overly concerned and picky...
so unrealistic. you're saying that now your mom's not happy being with your dad? since she doesn't want you to go through what she's gone through. haha you sure have a wierd(is wierd spelled this way or weird?) mom.
if your mom loves your dad deeply, like the way you do over the "flaws" guy, tell her that although she accept dad, a guy with "flaws", she still ended up happily ever after. no relationship can be a truely good one without bumps. -
For me is I can see the flaws and I acknowledge and discuss about them with him...but as long as he is willing to not let those flaws go overboard, I will still accept him as he is...Originally posted by shinta:hmm...
its not about lovin a perfect person.. its about lookin at an imperfect person perfectly..
like nel... he may not be the most perfect person in this world, but in my eyes, he's perfect, close to flawless
the only flaw he has would be....
hmm....
food can wait but work or games couldn... he'd get gastric pain one day if he goes on like this...
My parents said I am easily contented...I guess they want me to be with someone who is goodlooking, rich, highly educated and have a good personality...but I guess I am not a perfectionist like them when it comes to this matter of heart... -
it is weird.Originally posted by tut4nkh4m3n:oh my god.
so unrealistic. you're saying that now your mom's not happy being with your dad? since she doesn't want you to go through what she's gone through. haha you sure have a wierd(is wierd spelled this way or weird?) mom.
if your mom loves your dad deeply, like the way you do over the "flaws" guy, tell her that although she accept dad, a guy with "flaws", she still ended up happily ever after. no relationship can be a truely good one without bumps.
well, I guess in a way they are concerned about my happiness and well-being...but sometimes they meddle too much with my life.
I think my mom married my dad out of obligation to her parents more than anything else...I have a feeling it is an arranged marriage, well her parents arranged for her to meet my Dad... -
well in a case like this we all can't really do much except give advice.
seems like you come from quite a well-off family, big house, 3 cars, gold platinum card etc. it's usually parents from these home settings which expect much from their daughter's boyfriend. then i guess your boyfriend must be someone "normal", probably someone you met in your high school who lives in a HDB.
no offence,it's just my thinking.
either way i still think you should choose love over family, your guy will really be touched if you're on his side. look ahead at the happy times you 2 can spend tigether. true love lasts forever.
good luck in seeking your happiness.
i'm tired of this i'm gonna play games. you haven't told me how to spell wierd/weird yet... -
I have told you leh...in the post above yours. I said it in the first sentence.."it is WEIRD"Originally posted by tut4nkh4m3n:well in a case like this we all can't really do much except give advice.
seems like you come from quite a well-off family, big house, 3 cars, gold platinum card etc. it's usually parents from these home settings which expect much from their daughter's boyfriend. then i guess your boyfriend must be someone "normal", probably someone you met in your high school who lives in a HDB.
no offence,it's just my thinking.
either way i still think you should choose love over family, your guy will really be touched if you're on his side. look ahead at the happy times you 2 can spend tigether. true love lasts forever.
good luck in seeking your happiness.
i'm tired of this i'm gonna play games. you haven't told me how to spell wierd/weird yet...
Thanks for your advice, and no, I am not from a well-to-do family la... -
rainee jie... being financially independent doesn't give anyone the right to run away from home and think you dun need them anymore... just because you're a big gal now and can feed yourself
i've been financially independent for one and a half years,ever since i graduated from jc. and i have had terrible times with my dad. still i dun think of running away from home... at most is i go outside take a walk and cool down when i quarrel with my dad...
when u become financially independent, all the more responsibilities will fall on you. take it like an adult...
anyway, i digressed... if your parents dun like your guy ask them for a reason. if u think it is unjustified, tell them firmly and move on in your life anyway. they will come to understand it...
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They will nag...and try to make me change my mind...and how to live in peace if everyday also have to argue with them over this?Originally posted by starblue:rainee jie... being financially independent doesn't give anyone the right to run away from home and think you dun need them anymore... just because you're a big gal now and can feed yourself
i've been financially independent for one and a half years,ever since i graduated from jc. and i have had terrible times with my dad. still i dun think of running away from home... at most is i go outside take a walk and cool down when i quarrel with my dad...
when u become financially independent, all the more responsibilities will fall on you. take it like an adult...
anyway, i digressed... if your parents dun like your guy ask them for a reason. if u think it is unjustified, tell them firmly and move on in your life anyway. they will come to understand it... -
avoid them for a time being then can avoid the quarrels... or just bear the nagging lah.. nagging nia... not like my dad. i let him scold let him nag he will yue nag yue angry then go and hit table throw things... siao one.. i talk back he angry i let him scold he also angry.. kns.
they are your parents no matter wad.. just give in to them, listen to them nag.. you can still be with your guy in the end wad.. why let the nagging affect you?? -
they must have their reason la... try asking them for a reason and see if it make sense ? but to me i will listen more to my parent advice...heh life long happiness ... how old are u.. u really think your this and last with u meh..or just out to play u...Originally posted by rainee:I definitely want to be with him...but I feel a bit guilty if I were to argue with my parents over this lor...but if I don't argue my life long happiness will be at stake... -
then they force me to go meet other guys how?Originally posted by starblue:avoid them for a time being then can avoid the quarrels... or just bear the nagging lah.. nagging nia... not like my dad. i let him scold let him nag he will yue nag yue angry then go and hit table throw things... siao one.. i talk back he angry i let him scold he also angry.. kns.
they are your parents no matter wad.. just give in to them, listen to them nag.. you can still be with your guy in the end wad.. why let the nagging affect you?? Like they will arrange for me to meet other guys that they think are more "perfect"...I will definitely feel like I am betraying my ai ai if I go, but if I don't go, sure will tio scold... -
That means someone my parents choose confirm will be with me until the end of my life? And can you really force someone to love another? I have to be with someone I don't love just because I want to respect my parents' decision, just because they are more experienced?Originally posted by zheshi:they must have their reason la... try asking them for a reason and see if it make sense ? but to me i will listen more to my parent advice...heh life long happiness ... how old are u.. u really think your this and last with u meh..or just out to play u... -
i never say u must chose the one your parent chose for u ... i saying listen to their reason and see if it make any senses? of coz those like he too ugly for u , too poor for u all dun make sense la.. did u ever ask your mum for reason? and so what is the reason ?Originally posted by rainee:That means someone my parents choose confirm will be with me until the end of my life? And can you really force someone to love another? I have to be with someone I don't love just because I want to respect my parents' decision, just because they are more experienced?
Come on la.. some time u are too in love with someone .. that u totally skip away all his or her bad point...only outsider will saw it... i believe there must be a solid reason... why they dun allow u and him to be together... -
Well, they don't know about it yet...they can complain about a lot of things one, from looks to his financial situation...I have had previous experience with this...Originally posted by zheshi:i never say u must chose the one your parent chose for u ... i saying listen to their reason and see if it make any senses? of coz those like he too ugly for u , too poor for u all dun make sense la.. did u ever ask your mum for reason? and so what is the reason ?
Come on la.. some time u are too in love with someone .. that u totally skip away all his or her bad point...only outsider will saw it... i believe there must be a solid reason... why they dun allow u and him to be together... -
kinda true...Originally posted by starblue:rainee jie... being financially independent doesn't give anyone the right to run away from home and think you dun need them anymore... just because you're a big gal now and can feed yourself
i've been financially independent for one and a half years,ever since i graduated from jc. and i have had terrible times with my dad. still i dun think of running away from home... at most is i go outside take a walk and cool down when i quarrel with my dad...
when u become financially independent, all the more responsibilities will fall on you. take it like an adult...
anyway, i digressed... if your parents dun like your guy ask them for a reason. if u think it is unjustified, tell them firmly and move on in your life anyway. they will come to understand it...
but for my mom.... it's impossible to stay under the same roof as her
i'd go insane! -
it seems as though the guy you've fallen for is pretty bad. your parents complain about his looks, money matters, i wonder what more.
i wonder too what you see in him. -
every parent hope for all the best la... even if he average looking and income average.. they also will slam him like siao one la..Originally posted by tut4nkh4m3n:it seems as though the guy you've fallen for is pretty bad. your parents complain about his looks, money matters, i wonder what more.
i wonder too what you see in him. -
hey, i will not tolerate rudeness towards me or someone who is close to me. It does not matter what I see in him, different people have different things they are seeking for. It doesn't mean that every girl will be seeking a guy who is rich, good-looking and so on. So don't call him bad when you don't even know him.Originally posted by tut4nkh4m3n:it seems as though the guy you've fallen for is pretty bad. your parents complain about his looks, money matters, i wonder what more.
i wonder too what you see in him.
I am not saying my parents are complaining...I am saying if they complain... -
true...but then again not possible for every girl to marry someone who is as rich as a prince and also good looking at the same time...actually i will feel very insecure when I am with someone like that, plus I will feel intimidatedOriginally posted by zheshi:every parent hope for all the best la... even if he average looking and income average.. they also will slam him like siao one la.. And I am not used to that kind of lifestyle... -
haha sorry then, my bad.Originally posted by rainee:hey, i will not tolerate rudeness towards me or someone who is close to me. It does not matter what I see in him, different people have different things they are seeking for. It doesn't mean that every girl will be seeking a guy who is rich, good-looking and so on. So don't call him bad when you don't even know him.
I am not saying my parents are complaining...I am saying if they complain...
at least this shows you truely love him, does he truely love you?