a mail i once typed about a c0ckroach
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something horrific happened to me yesterday night. see, i was just surfing the net, sitting ever so quietly on my bed, minding my own business. when suddenly, this HUGE 2-inch flying c0ckroach crash-landed on a pile of CDs very near to my right, with an extremely sonorous plop. i thought it was the normal brown beetles that have always been fond of me, but out of the corner of my eye, i saw and knew that THAT hideously gross shape (and not to mention size) was not the usual asshole.
i took a very solid look directly at the offensive intruder, and i squealed. mind you, i never really squeal at all. but that one woke my mother up, it did. i leapt up from my bed and away from the foul creature. to my utter horror, that gross shit flapped it wings and threatened to home in on me. i squealed again, this time sounding extremely petrified. i sprinted out of my room and shouted desperately for reinforcement.
but reinforcement said she has to wake up early in the morning tomorrow, and asked me to take care of the situation myself. THIS IS NOT A MERE SITUATION!!!! i yelled at her. this is a 9-11, code RED emergency! but there was no further response, and i knew help would not arrive.
i raced to the kitchen to recruit the trusted chemobiological weapon and stood, camouflaged behind my door post, surveying the territory for that intruder. i waited, and watched for the tiniest of movements. i was about to give up and move in closer when that basterd came scuttling out from under my bed and towards me!!
i went into action immediately, this time more confident of a confrontation. i am, afterall, armed. when the thing came within a mere meter from my foot, i aimed and fired the toxic nerve gas. but it was too fast!! it zoomed back under the bed and when i bent down to look, it has vanished. i flipped over my mattress, determined find it. if it's alive, i'll try again, and this time i won't fail. if it's dead, then i wanna see its carcass.
but alas, that piece of sht was too cunning. it remained hidden no matter where i looked. but i knew it was still in there somewhere. a c0ckroach that big cant possibly be killed with an indirect spray of the bygon.
i decided i couldnt sleep in there that night. not until i see that creature on its back, legs kicking vigorously in the air. i moved my blankets and pillow to my brother's room and the extra bed (the other bro's in camp).
finally, i sprayed under the bed and closed all windows and door, intending to gas the little conniving b!tch. i just hope that it doesnt lay any eggs in my room.
ever got those huge flying c0ckroaches in your room?
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Always is my mum kill it de.. I am afraid of cockroaches -
How to deal with roaches:
1. Take a bedroom slipper.
2. Smash. Hard and fast.
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Originally posted by fudgester:How to deal with roaches:
1. Take a bedroom slipper.
2. Smash. Hard and fast. The juice.. 
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Which one do you prefer - a live pregnant roach which may infest your room, or a dead juicy one which will never bother you again?Originally posted by Darkness_hacker99: The juice.. -
did you know c0ckroachees fly only when pregnant?
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I hit the cockroach, you do the clean up for me?Originally posted by fudgester:Which one do you prefer - a live pregnant roach which may infest your room, or a dead juicy one which will never bother you again? -
i prefer to use a rolled up newspaperOriginally posted by fudgester:How to deal with roaches:
1. Take a bedroom slipper.
2. Smash. Hard and fast. 
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yea...the smell and the disgusting..eeeeOriginally posted by Darkness_hacker99: The juice.. -
Wimp.Originally posted by Darkness_hacker99:I hit the cockroach, you do the clean up for me?
Anyway, I don't trust insecticide.... you can never really kill a roach with it unless if the roach gets into an area with a sufficient concentration of insecticide with little chance of escape.
I still prefer using Newton's Second Law on the roach.
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they will go into false death then after that come back to huant you if you just use insecticide. i think they die onlyif they get drowned in insecticideOriginally posted by fudgester:Wimp.
Anyway, I don't trust insecticide.... you can never really kill a roach with it unless if the roach gets into an area with a sufficient concentration of insecticide with little chance of escape.
I still prefer using Newton's Second Law on the roach.
use the force -
I shall stick to Biochemistry method.Originally posted by fudgester:Wimp.
Anyway, I don't trust insecticide.... you can never really kill a roach with it unless if the roach gets into an area with a sufficient concentration of insecticide with little chance of escape.
I still prefer using Newton's Second Law on the roach. -
Like I said.... unless if the space is sufficiently confined to concentrate the insecticide enough to kill within a few seconds, chances are that the roach will be able to escape the affected area with little or no effects at all.Originally posted by Darkness_hacker99:I shall stick to Biochemistry method.
Besides, it lacks the adrenaline rush that comes from using F = ma on the roach. -
I just spent 1 min reading your article.
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put the naptha ball lah
either they leave the area or die of the smell -
What an exciting recount of the incident!
Are you a girl?
That was one very interesting post.
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yes... once in a while will hv... so to kill fast, u need a gd bygon, newspaper(TNP/today) 24/7 in ur room... reali a pest... if dun kill whole nite can hear it fly here n there...Originally posted by starblue:...
ever got those huge flying c0ckroaches in your room? 
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If the egg case is deposited, you may get an infestation similar to the Alien's movie.Originally posted by fudgester:Which one do you prefer - a live pregnant roach which may infest your room, or a dead juicy one which will never bother you again? -
Roaches fly to protect their eggs.
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eew i'd nv get close to one..dead or alive..
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thank you. *bows graciously*. and yes, i'm a girl.Originally posted by Viper`:What an exciting recount of the incident!
Are you a girl?
That was one very interesting post.
it was a mail i typed to a penpal. he asked in his reply if i found that c0ckroach the next day, and i replied:
nope, i still havent found the offending creature. but i know it must still be in there somewhere, hiding and bidding its time to launch an underhanded attack on my unsuspecting, innocent self. the 2nd night i also slept in my bro's room. but then the 3rd night, i was reading on my bed (i tot that hey, since i'm awake, i'd see any tiny movements should the little piece of shit come out.). then, I CAN'T BELIEVE I ACTUALLY FELL ASLEEP!!!!!!
so yeah, i slept blissfully to the next morning, unaware of what manner of conspiracies that blasted thing might be planning. so on the 4th night, i tot, wth, since nothing happened on the 3rd night, i might as well just sleep in my room from now on, cockroach or no cockroach. you have no idea how badly i slept in my bro's bed those 2 nights. i swear, i never knew i am the sort to "recognise" beds before.
up to this morning, i still am convinced that that thing must still be in my room, and i can only hope it's dead. but not very likely. cockroaches are so damned versatile that should a nuclear war break out all over Earth, the only things surviving that would be the deep oceanic life and a horde of cockroaches, probably now having developed some 8 extra legs and 3 mouths, all the better to evade and eat with.
omg, that incident gave me nightmares for a few nights.... -
yah... me also very scared of flying things one.... even those brown beetles ah, always scream at my mum to come get rid of them for me de... dunno why, but those damn things always disturb me only. if i am in my room, they fly to my room. if i'm in the living room, they appear in the living room. if i am using my desktop in my bro's room, then that's where they'll go.Originally posted by Darkness_hacker99:
Always is my mum kill it de.. I am afraid of cockroaches
wtf....
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cannot... i dun dare lah. they move so fast... i dun even wanna get too close to them loh, wait they climb up my leg how???Originally posted by fudgester:How to deal with roaches:
1. Take a bedroom slipper.
2. Smash. Hard and fast.
/skin crawls
those foul mistakes of nature.
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nice compo...
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was i the one who told u this???Originally posted by hisoka:did you know c0ckroachees fly only when pregnant?
not so long ago, i found out that this is not true for all c0ckroaches... some species of c0ckroaches can fly whenever they mature, regardless of sex, or pregnancy.
so dun make the same mistake le.