Cow Economy
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Cow Economy
TRADITIONAL CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.
AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the band, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. Sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release. The public buys your bull.
AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when the cow drops dead.
FRENCH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.
JAPANESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty time the milk. You then create clever cow cartoon images called Cowikimon and market them worldwide.
A GERMAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You reengineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.
AN ITALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows, but you don't know where they are... You break for lunch.
A RUSSIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You count them and learn you have five cows.
You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
You count them again and learn you have 12 cows.
You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.
A SWISS CORPORATION
You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them.
CHINESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them.
You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported the numbers.
A BRITISH CORPORATION
You have two cows... both are mad.
A NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION
You have two cows... and the one on the left is kinda cute... -
Socialism: u haf 2 cows. The State takes one and gives it to someone else.
Communism: u haf 2 cows. The State takes both and gives u milk.
Fascism: u haf 2 cows. The State takes both and sells u milk.
Nazism: u haf 2 cows. The State takes and shoots u.
Bureaucracy: u haf 2 cows. The States takes both, kills one and spills the milk in the sewage system.
Capitalism: u haf 2 cows. u sell one and buy a bull.
Singapore Democracy: u haf 2 cows. the govt fines u for keeping 2 unlicensed animals in an apartment.
American Democracy: the govt promises to give u 2 cows if u vote for them. after the election, the president is impeached for speculating in cow futures. the press dubs the affair "Cowgate".
British Democracy: u haf 2 cows. you feed them sheep's brain and they go mad. the govt doesn't do anything.
Russain Democracy: u are still q-ing for the 1st cow.
Iraqi Democracy: you canot inspect the 2 cows.
M'sian Democracy: the cows are now controlled frm grazing and you r jailed for being unfit to rear cows.
Japanese Democracy: u haf 2 cows. you give the milk to gangsters so they dun ask awkward qns abt who u are giving the milk to.
HongKong Democracy: u haf 2 cows. you sell 3 of them to ur publicly-listed company, usin letters of credit opened by ur brother-in-law at the bacnk, then u execute a debt/equity swap wif an associated general offer so tt u get all 4 cows bac, wif a tax deduction for keeping 5 cows. the milk rights are transferred via a Panamanian intermediary to a Cayman Islands company secretly owned by the major shareholder who sells the righte to all 7 cows bac to the listed company. the annual report says tt the company owns 8 cows, wif an option to purchase one more. meanwhile, u kill the 2 cows bcos the fengshui is bad. -
Holy cow!!!
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Who is calling me?
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what are the parents of cowboys?
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cow pei cow bu.Originally posted by Cepat:what are the parents of cowboys? -
so funny
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wa COW
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wahahhahaa.. so funny..