Waiter! This coffee tastes like mud." "Yes sir, it's fresh ground."
Why don't cannibals eat comedians? Because they taste funny.
How do you describe the average cannibal? A guy with a wife and ate children.
What does mozart do now that he is dead? He de-composes.....

One day this guys house was on fire so he decided he better call the fire department. He got on the phone with the chief and the man was very frantic. The man said chief you have to get over her my house is on fire. The chief says calm down, how do we get to your house, and the man said" don't you have those big red trucks anymore!'
Did you hear about the cannibal who came home late for dinner and his wife gave him a cold shoulder?
There are three kinds of people in the world. Those who can count. And those who can't.
