Scottish nuns
-
Two Scottish nuns have just arrived in USA by boat and one says
to the other, "I hear that the people of this country actually
eat dogs."
"Odd," her companion replies, "but if we shall live in America,
we might as well do as the Americans do."
Nodding emphatically, the mother superior points to a hot dog
vendor and they both walk towards the cart. "Two dogs, please,
"says one.
The vendor is only too pleased to oblige, wraps both hot dogs
in foil and hands them over the counter. Excited, the nuns hurry
to a bench and begin to unwrap their 'dogs.'
The mother superior is first to open hers. She begins to blush
and, then, staring at it for a moment, leans to the other nun
and whispers cautiously, "What part did you get?" -
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
Two nuns, Sister Mary and Sister Joan were driving through Transylvania at night on a deserted road.
Suddenly, a vampire jumped on their bonnet and was trying to get them through the windscreen.
"Sister Joan, try swerving around, maybe the vampire will fall off!", said Sister Mary.
Sister Joan turned the wheel around a few times but the vampire still clung on.
"Sister Mary, I'll try using the wipers, maybe it'll fall off," said Sister Joan.
Still, the vampire hung on grimly.
"I know, show the vampire your cross!" said Sister Joan.
"Okay," said Sister Mary.
She wound down the window, stuck her head out, waved her fist at the vampire and shouted angrily at the vampire. "Get off the f**king car you stupid son-of-a-b**ch!!"
-
-
-
-
lol to the second one