A young boy was on a school bus, and kept talking to himself. He was seated right behind the bus driver.
"If i had a gun, a baton and handcuffs, i would be a policeman!" yelled the boy
The bus driver just ignored him and continued driving.
"If i had a briefcase, a suit, and a tie, i would be a businessman!" yelled the boy
The bus driver continued to drive but got irritated.
"If i had books, a duster and a marker, i would be a teacher!" yelled the boy
The bus driver had, had enough. He stopped the bus, turned to the boy and said....
"WHAT IF YOU WERE FAT, HAD NO HAIR AND HAD NO PARENTS!"
The boy smiled and said "I would be a bus driver"
Heard this before, but in the form of a Liverpool insult haha
Good one =D