Pickup Lines
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A collection of the best and the worst!
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hey baby, you must be the plague, cuz you give me fever and a swelling in the groin
guy looks at a girls tag in top ,, says " hey i was right you are made in heaven"
Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
If I flip a coin, what do you think my chances are of getting head?
At the office copy machine
"Reproducing eh? Can I help?"DIRECTED TO UGLY CHICK
Damn... I wish i was blind"Nice legs, what time do they open?"
"Are you from Mars, because that ass outta this world!"
"If you were my sister, incest would be cool."
i forgot my number....can i borrow urs?
Are You Osama-Bin-Ladin's Daughter? cuz your the BOMB
Hey your cute....lets hug!
we've got the chemistry, now let's do the physics
"Your name must be Gillette, cos your the best a man can get"
"You must work at the UPS, 'cause i coulda sworn i saw you checkin' out my package!"
"Hey, have you got any Raisins? No? How about a Date?".
"Hey baby, you must've been a cesarian cause you're way too phat to have come out a vagina"
"Excuse me, I am about to go home to masturbate and needed a name to go with the face."
"Hi. I'm an astronaut, and my next mission is to explore Uranus."
"You're like constipation...you take my breath away."
"You must work in a chicken farm because you sure know how to raise cocks"
"My love for you is like diarrhoea, it just keeps coming out"
"hey, my dick just died.. can i bury it in your ass?"
"If ur name was homework, I'd do u on my desk."
does your tongue taste the same as mine???
Hey baby will you be my math tutor tonight?
we can add a bed, subtract our clothes, Divide my legs and multiply"Hi, my name is Milk. I'll do your body good."
"You must have spanner eyes, because when I look at you, my nuts tighten"
A: "hey how heavy is a polar bear"
B: "Dont know"
A: "Heavy enough to break the ice, hi im.....Can I lie tangent to your curves?
our love is like the decimal for pi, it goes on and on and on
i wish i was sine squared theta and you were cos squared theta, then we'd be one
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Enjoy and feel free to add any you have!
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more....
Did you lose your wings because I think you fell from heaven
Hey baby, I'm into integral calculus; and I'd love to find the area under your curves.
"I know it's a Saturday, but do you think you'd be open for some direct deposits later? "
kiss me if I'm wrong, but is your name Aphrodite?"
"Does this rag smell like Chloroform?"
have you ever tripped over a tree trunk? how about a branch? how about a root?
Male: I don't feel well
Female: Why?
Male: I feel as if I've got an elephant in my stomach
Female: What??
Male: I think its trunk is sticking out.
Guy: Do you have chicken in your fridge??
Girl: Yes.
Guy: How big are your breasts?"Are your parents retarded, because your special"
"I'll cook you dinner if you cook me breakfast" (think about this one)
" is ur dad a baker coz u have nice buns "
"I've shat my pants, can i get in yours?"
Guy: Do you sleep on your stomach
Girl: no
Guy: Can I?Guy: oh hai do you like mushrooms?
Girl: no
Guy: how about a (fungi)fun guy?Guy: Do you have a band-aid?
Girl: Why?
Guy: Because I scraped my knee when I fell for you."Ladies, I am your GOD! Tell me, which piece of clothing will you be sacrificing in my honour tonight?"
"Have you seen my beach ball? It's this big (flex to show biceps), this round (flex to show triceps) and it went over there (stretch to show off pecs and point over to one side) ..."
feel free to contribute
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engineers joke.
i get arc eye when i look at you
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hi, i'm fred flintsone and i can make your bed rock
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Hi, my name is To Night, you can call me To Night.
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pic out your favs.
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I’m sure that I will always be
A lonely number like root three
The three is all that’s good and right,
Why must my three keep out of sight
Beneath the vicious square root sign,
I wish instead I were a nine
For nine could thwart this evil trick,
with just some quick arithmetic
I know I’ll never see the sun, as 1.7321
Such is my reality, a sad irrationality
When hark! What is this I see,
Another square root of a three
As quietly co-waltzing by,
Together now we multiply
To form a number we prefer,
Rejoicing as an integer
We break free from our mortal bonds
With the wave of magic wands
Our square root signs become unglued
Your love for me has been renewed -
LOL
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Originally posted by greengoblin:
I’m sure that I will always be
A lonely number like root three
The three is all that’s good and right,
Why must my three keep out of sight
Beneath the vicious square root sign,
I wish instead I were a nine
For nine could thwart this evil trick,
with just some quick arithmetic
I know I’ll never see the sun, as 1.7321
Such is my reality, a sad irrationality
When hark! What is this I see,
Another square root of a three
As quietly co-waltzing by,
Together now we multiply
To form a number we prefer,
Rejoicing as an integer
We break free from our mortal bonds
With the wave of magic wands
Our square root signs become unglued
Your love for me has been renewed
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Originally posted by greengoblin:
I’m sure that I will always be
A lonely number like root three
The three is all that’s good and right,
Why must my three keep out of sight
Beneath the vicious square root sign,
I wish instead I were a nine
For nine could thwart this evil trick,
with just some quick arithmetic
I know I’ll never see the sun, as 1.7321
Such is my reality, a sad irrationality
When hark! What is this I see,
Another square root of a three
As quietly co-waltzing by,
Together now we multiply
To form a number we prefer,
Rejoicing as an integer
We break free from our mortal bonds
With the wave of magic wands
Our square root signs become unglued
Your love for me has been renewed