North Korea claims proof of unicorns

• NeverSayGoodBye

  30 Jun 13, 19:19

  

  Archaeologists reportedly find a secret burial ground for the magical creatures.

  North Korea may be the last Stalinist state on the planet. The government's obsession with military hardware has left the economy in shambles and the country is suffering chronic shortages of fuel, electricity and raw materials. But when push comes to shove, none of that really matters, because North Korea has a hidden unicorn lair. Who else can make that claim?

   

  The Korean Central News Agency (KCNA) reveals that archeologists from the History Institute of the DPRK Academy of Social Sciences have discovered a secret hideaway that was the burial site of the unicorn ridden by King Tongmyeong, the founding father of the ancient Korean kingdom of Goguryeo (37 B.C.-668 A.D.).

   

  According to legend, Tongmyeong was born from an egg impregnated by sunlight — soof course he commuted by unicorn.

   

  The news agency seems partial to magical news. Past reports have noted that deceased leader Kim Jong Il was born under a double rainbow, he once stopped a blizzard with his bare hands, and — even more miraculously — he once shot 11 holes-in-one in a single golf outing, even though he was apparently born from human parents, rather than an egg and sunbeams like the legendary founding father.

  
  Sung-Yoon Lee, professor of Korean Studies at Tufts, tells the "Today" show, “The intent behind this is to try to bolster up the credentials of the young leader who is still in his 20s. North Korea likes to make the claim that heroic blood runs in the family.”
• ^Acid^ aka s|aO^eH~

  1 Jul 13, 09:15

  The news agency seems partial to magical news. Past reports have noted that deceased leader Kim Jong Il was born under a double rainbow, he once stopped a blizzard with his bare hands, and — even more miraculously — he once shot 11 holes-in-one in a single golf outing, even though he was apparently born from human parents, rather than an egg and sunbeams like the legendary founding father.

   

  They mistook Chuck Norris izzit???

• charlize

  1 Jul 13, 21:31

  Maybe Chuck is from N Korea.

• GHoST_18

  1 Jul 13, 21:54

  no. chuck is actually Kim Jong Il

  

• charlize

  1 Jul 13, 21:57

  In that case, they don't need to find the secret buriel ground.

   

  The secret buriel ground will find chuck.

• Gu7777g

  1 Jul 13, 22:02

  hmm?

• the Bear

  1 Jul 13, 22:13

  AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

• ^Acid^ aka s|aO^eH~

  2 Jul 13, 09:38

  Originally posted by GHoST_18:

  no. chuck is actually Kim Jong Il

  

  
  Korea Ranger...

   

  Kim Jong II roundhouse kick...

   

   

  *pants tear*

  

• charlize

  3 Jul 13, 19:24