by Pak Cham KaiCrazy Horse, the Paris-based cabaret involving scantily-clad dancers which will be opening in Clarke Quay this December, has protested the Singapore GahmenÂ’s insistence that they give priority to White Horses.
“It is important that foreign shows take into account local culture and sensitivities, “ said Mr. Quah Neh Neh, a spokesman for MICA (the Ministry of the Inevitable Censorship of the Arts). “For instance, the upcoming casino has had to be transformed into an integrated resort. So likewise, Crazy Horse must adapt itself to Singaporean mores.”
According to Mr. Quah, “It is an established part of Singaporean society that white horses receive special treatment, and it is important that Crazy Horse respect our traditions.”
To emphasize his point, Mr. Quah pointed out that even in the Singapore Turf ClubÂ’s logo, the horse in the lead is a white stallion.
“Sacre bleu,” ejaculated Monsieur Cheval Fou, the deputy director appointed to oversee the Singapore branch. “Zer Gouvernment is tres annoying, n’est ce pas? ‘Oo are zey to demand zat white ‘orses deserve special treatment over our regular crazy ‘orses? Zat is not democracy!”
Msieu Fou fulminated further that “If we ‘ave to accommodate white ‘orses to the extent that our show is affected, I am afraid zat our new Clarke Quay cabaret will become an, ‘ow you say, white elephant!”
Msieu FouÂ’s statement comes hot on the heels of complaints from Las Vegas casino mogul Steve Wynn over alleged Gahmen attempts to micromanage his plans to set up an integrated resort here.
However, Mr. Kan Por No, a spokesman for Beng Wah Organisation, the Singapore based chain of cinemas that is partnering with Crazy Horse, has insisted that they will work to ensure that the Singapore-based show meets the GahmenÂ’s requirements without compromising quality.
“We want Crazy Horse to be a boh beh chow show!” Mr. Kan said. “At the same time, we are damn scared the Gahmen will ‘mare’ (scold) us.”
The SAF Music and Drama Company is already preparing their White Horse dancers to join Crazy Horse. Said MDC officer-in-charge Major Chao Ah Quah, “We’re now choreographing a uniquely Singaporean dance piece, wherein our white horses will gallop towards a faraway tree, touch it and come back.”
In other news, the Singapore Beef Importers Association is filing a protest with the Gahmen, citing discriminatory trade practices. Said a spokesperson, “How come can bring in Crazy Horse, but cannot bring in mad cow?”
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