Originally posted by the mimic:
hey people.. im bored.. please entertain me
This story give me a good laugh. Hope can keep you entertained.
Ripped it from Rockson.blogspot.com
quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tuesday, August 16, 2005
Fuck man, no more President election holiday
This few day work damn busy. Pak chew cheng also no time, don't say blog. I so tired until I hold my horse pak half way and koon.
I still very toolan about the President election kena cancel. Fuck lah, Singapore is so hard to get one lan cheow holiday, but because only got one man kena the Certificate of Egibity to run for election, then he is become the automatic winner. No holiday liao KNN.
Of course our old president can get approve for the president COE lah. The Selecting President Society read his report card and see "Last job: President of Singapore, 6 Years", confirm to give him what!!!
Unless this old president employer come out and say, Nabei! last time hor, when he is president that time, we is his boss and cheebye lah, we already told him he %&&$ed up and not performing the A star grade, so we give him chance. Then because we is kind boss, we give chance for one year, two year, three year, four year, five year, and even six year, in the end we give him the last final really really no give chance warning liao and say he must resign or else we very stress have to find some more chance to give.
But this never happen lah (Singapore president where got one more boss upstairs one?). So our president pass lor. Some more he do quite good job, so never kena complain.
But a lot of people still not happy, they say this is not election! This is call selection! We never %&&$ing get to choose! We want to have four man protest!!! The Singapore people shout Cheebye and sibei toolan got no election!!!
In the newspaper, "Cheebye and sibei toolan got no election!!!" become write in English as "Yay Singaporean very the happy no need to choose president!!!";. Maybe the newspaper hokkien not so good, never translate properly.
Last night Raymond tell me when we are drinking at the lounge, actually, Singapore president got elect by Singapore people what!
I said, cheebye lah where got?
Raymond said, Got! Three people elect lor. Hahahahahaha!!!!!
That %&&$er Raymond always make this kind of stupid joke.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
OldAhPek
Member
Joined: 31 Dec 2004
Posts: 906
Send Message 18 August 2005 · 07:29 PM
quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Then Raymond said, You should thank the Gahmen, they call this three clever people to help you choose the president, so you don't have to use your brain, waste your energy go and vote. Then you can use your brain to choose what food you want to eat for lunch, what drink you want to drink in the pub, and what PRC mei mei you want to %*@* in Geylang, no need to waste on choosing president. Hahahahaha!!!!
I want to throw my beer at his laughing cheebye face already and then he said, anyway, actually the President is really choose by us. Really.
I dowan to waste my beer, so I drink it and say why you say that?
Raymond said, See ah, ok, who choose the president one?
I said, Selecting President Society!
Then Raymond said, Who choose the Selecting President Society one?
I said, Gahmen lah, cheebye!
Then Raymond said, Who choose the Gahmen one?
I look at him and stone for a while.
Then Raymond laugh and said, Ahhhhhhh, we %*@*ers lor. So we elected the President lah! Hahahahaha!!!!
I want to punch his arm liao but I forgot because behind him got one chio bu walk pass, wearing the front low low top, low until can see two half of her goodies and almost see her stomach liao. People is V neck, she is U neck, hahahahahaha!!! See already my horse sedia. And I later go to toilet to pee also damn toolan, keep shooting the wall and the sky. We are like this, see goodies liao will steam damn fast and forget our angry even faster.
Actually talk about steam, Singapore becoming president standard is also very steam. Must be superman gahmen department boss for three years or $100 million company CEO. Wa lao eh, where to find?
Actually, I got know one guy Ah Heng who can pass the Selecting President Society exam. He is boss of a secret society (no number one, because real gang don't have number) and his gang make million billion dollars every year selling pirated DVD and pc program and as loanshark.
He also CEO, ok? And every year his gang make money, never lose. Our country CPF money let him look after he sure take it and make into golden egg for us.
But he wear singlet and slipper everywhere, so don't looks so high class. Also I think his whole body the tattoo everywhere is look a bit scary. Fuck man, his fingernail and eyelid also got tattoo. Somemore his temper no good and he always scold people lan cheow and %*@* your mothercheebye and KNNBCCB.
If Ah Heng do the National Day parade, he have to wear long sleeve shirt to cover his tattoo or people will scared.
When the commander ask him Sir! Permission to start the parade sir!
President Ah Heng will sure say Pua Chee Bye! Don't be so blur %*@*! KNN want to start the parade then start lah! Every cheebye thing also must ask me first ah! Limpei President Ah Heng is your mother issit?
But Ah Heng cannot be president one. He is $100 million dollar company CEO but he fail the last part of the exam. The exam say the president must have good character and got nobody %*@* him.
Fuck lah, this kind of thing how to pass? Want to find your bad things very easy ok? Your cheebye mother in law say you useless %*@*er son in law can also consider not good character what.
I think we need to start a president school. Singapore country very small, so must start early find those got president standard kind of student.
Raymond and me will start a president school to teach you important things......
-how to kiss babies
-how to conduct national day parade
-how to do charity
-don't anyhow ask question about Singapore Gahmen money
-how to meet the president of other country (who also not standard enough to be our president)
I think when you compare, other country president is all no standard. Like USA one. Got one cowboy actor. Got one chee koh pek like to get blowjob by his own office girl. Got one stupid cowboy rich man son. All %*@*ed up. Maybe that's why their pay less than our president.
I think I dowan to be president now, just be gahmen department boss or gahmen company boss can already. Every year can be %*@*ed up but will get chance, and still get my big bonus and get report card say well done good job. As long as don't try to be president without gahmen permission, I no need to scared no job.
I can be CFO, Chief Fucking Officer! Hahahahahaha!!!!