And indeed, that is why 'Singapore is solid'!
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Philosophy
Singapore and Malaysia have a different philosophies of life. This becomes apparent when we compare the two countries' Rules of Simple Living.
Singapore:
1 - One Wife
2 - Two Children
3 - Three Bedroom Condo
4 - Four Wheels
5 - Five Figure Salary
And indeed, that is why 'Singapore is solid'!
Malaysia? Well, Malaysia's Rules of Simple Living are the
following:
5 - Five Children
4 - Four Wives
3 - Three Figure Salary
2 - Two Wheels
1 - One-Storey Link House... -
by josh... that sounds..... too real to be true.
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In Singapore, the majority of us live in Highly Dangerous Buildings (HDB),
And most people have already got used to Paying and Paying (PAP).
Not only do you have to pay, you Pay Until Bankrupt (PUB).
If that's not enough, somebody still Purposely Wants to Dig (PWD) and get more from you.
So what more can you do when you are in the Money Only Environment (MOE)?
With the current Mad Accounting System (MAS), you are forced to Pay the Sum Ahead (PSA),
Which will leave some people Permanently Owing Some Banks (POSB).
And forced to live on the Loan Techniques Always (LTA) system.
When you fall sick and happen to be admitted to a Money Operating Hospital(MOH),
You might be able to use your Cash Prior to Funeral (CPF) fund.
If you are out of luck, you may meet doctors who Never Use Heart (NUH) to treat you,
And you will be Sure to Give up Hope (SGH).
To help ease the traffic, motorists have to pay Cash On Expressway (COE).
If that doesn't help, they can always Eternally Raise Prices (ERP) on the roads.
If you don't own a car, you can always make a Mad Rush to the Train (MRT),
OR get squashed in a bus Side By Side (SBS).
Lastly, under all these pressures, there are not many places we can relax,
Not even the good old place we used to go because it has become
So Expensive and Nothing To See Actually (SENTOSA)!!! -
Why Singapore girls can never make it to Miss Universe final?
Miss Singapore
One of the main reasons why in recent years the Singapore Government has always ensured that their Miss Universe representative were of tertiary level education or higher was because of the following incident which occurred not too many years ago. It is the final round of the Miss Universe Pageant and the 3 finalists, Miss USA, Miss Malaysia and Miss Singapore are being asked 3 simple questions:
MC: The first question is name me an electrical appliance starting with "L"
Miss USA: Lamp
Miss Malaysia: Light bulb
Miss Singapore: LADIO
Judge: No, no, Radio does not start with the letter "L"
MC: I am going to give you 2 more chances; The next question is name me an animal starting with the letter "L"
Miss USA: Lion
Miss Malaysia: Leopard
Miss Singapore: LABBIT
Judge: No, no, no, Rabbit does not start with the letter "L"
MC: I am going to give you one last chance, if you answer this question
incorrectly, you are disqualified.
Name me a fruit starting with the letter "L"
Miss USA: Lemon
Miss Malaysia: Lychee
Miss Singapore, with full of confidence, smiles and says: LIEWLIAN !
This is not the end of the story, the Judge consulted the board of judges to determine if Miss Singapore should really disqualified; and they decided that since Miss Singapore was having as many problems with the letter "L", the decided to give her another chance.
Judge: OK, the final question is name me a human anatomy starting with the letter "L"
Miss USA: Lung (applause)
Miss Malaysia: Liver (even more applause)
Miss Singapore: LAN CHEOW !
Judge: ?????????!!!! -
i thought erp is 'everyday rob ppl'?
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to be preciseOriginally posted by Honeybunz:Malaysia? Well, Malaysia's Rules of Simple Living are the
following:
5 - Five Children
4 - Four Wives
3 - Three Figure Salary
2 - Two Wheels
1 - One-Storey Link House...
those are only the bumiputras' rules of simple living
leeches of the industrious m'sian chinese community -
Logik, sial
A World Bank development official went into a kampung to help the residents improve economically.
He immediately felt the reason for the poverty was clear when he saw Mat lounging under a tree.
"Why aren't you working?" he asked.
"Work for what?" replied Mat.
World Bank Official: "So you can have an income!"
Mat: "For what?"
World Bank Official: "So you can start saving!"
Mat: "For what?"
World Bank Official: "So you don't have to work any more!"
Mat looked at him, puzzled, and said: "I'm not working now." -
Once there was a kampung, and the village headman was very concerned about the poor economic performance of the Malay community. So he commissioned a professor of sociology to study all the communities of the village to discover the cause.
After much study, the professor finally reported back to the headman.
"Well, it looks like the economic problems all stem from the drumbeats of each community," said the professor.
"Eh? What you talking?" replied the headman.
"You see, the Malay word for 'profit' is 'untong'. And it so happens that the Chinese drumbeat is UNTONG ... UNTONG ... UNTONG, UNTONG, UNTONG!!"
"I see, so of course they make lots of money! And what about the Indians?"
"Well, the Indians don't make that much money, so their drumbeat is SIKIT SIKIT UNTONG, SIKIT SIKIT UNTONG."
"And the Malays?"
"Unfortunately, it's TAK UNTONG, TAK UNTONG, TAK UNTONG ..." -
That's a good one +1