To be heartless or not to be?
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I have no idea how i should craft this post. Its kinda difficult to explain...
I have a long time platonic friend of the opposite sex. We have no physical relationship, simply not attracted to each other...
So the thing is, when we're attached, we dun really contact each other, but when we're single, we'll hang out together.
For me its the longing for companionship i guess? She's my movie kaki, shopping kaki, karaoke kaki, occasional clubbing kaki... We don't really have much in common, in fact we disagree on many things, but i always give in and endure her nonsense. Perhaps because i do think we are friends. Even when she insults and disrespects the things i love and cherish, i'll just pretend not to hear and just rub it off as her being HER. Afterall there ARE times when she is sweet. Rare as they are...
After all these years, she is still the way she was, and nothing i've said had any effect on her. Give me another 10 years and i doubt anything would change.
Sometimes i think i should just disappear from her life. But when i look at her and how she has no one to turn to at all, my heart softens and i can't bring myself to do it. Oh sure, she has friends. Mostly guy friends who keep trying to bed her.... True friends who would really care for her and not try to take advantage of her? 1? 2? But what is the point of me remaining when i can't make her see that the way she behaves and treats others is wrong? She has her own warped interpretation of everything every single time and refuses to accept what anyone says. In the end she would take our silence as our agreement with her view. In a way i'm agreeing with her and making her even more self-righteous...
So what should i do? It seems that every decision is wrong. Either i hurt her or i hurt myself, or i'll eventually hurt someone else...
Maybe someone has an answer? A sound advice? Or perhaps not... -
intro your frend to me.
i will take good care of her and not bed her i promise -
if u can continue 2 tolerate her nonsense then stay on wif her. otherwise,leave.
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sometimes it's best if you just be friend and just care for a certain extent...
If you really respect her as a friend, you should try to ward off all the guys that are trying to get in her bed.. -
Wat is Ur threshold?...
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She expects me to give her the attention a bf would give... sometimes i feel like Aladdin's magic lamp... I can only do that much as a friend. It may sound selfish, but when someone i really really like finally appears before me, there is no way i can still give her all my time and attention. And i've told her that... Its not like she fancies me either. I don't see why i'm obliged to be her genie forever and ever. When her new beau comes along, she would forget all about me again anyway. Just so happens that this time, i made the first move...
And i HAVE met someone that i rather spend time with. Someone who listens and understands what i'm saying... (i think...). Even if its 99% online time together. Even if we don't talk that much. But knowing that we're both online and that i can talk to her anytime a topic comes up... it feels good. Plus i've also reconciled myself with my faith... i want to move on...
Can i be selfish just once? Am i really being selfish? -
I've never lost my temper at anyone since i was 15... Its not really about reaching my limit. But rather a decision to move on or not to...Originally posted by Simple_Bear:Wat is Ur threshold?...
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why dont you introduce her to this forum?
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your not being selfish la... its her own problem..
no guy could be there for a girl ALL the time. I learned it first hand.
Tell her and remind her every single time that you are only her friend and not more and that you have a lot of other things to do then to be her 'Genie'... -
You should post this in Aunt Agony for more responses
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maybe try having a talk with her? although it will somehow hurt her... you're actually helping her...
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song yang ru hu kou!Originally posted by dragg:why dont you introduce her to this forum? -
don't need to leave...just tell her in her face
You better change...or else... -
sounds familiar, but i still looking for the best answer... good luck...Originally posted by Justy:I have no idea how i should craft this post. Its kinda difficult to explain...
I have a long time platonic friend of the opposite sex. We have no physical relationship, simply not attracted to each other...
So the thing is, when we're attached, we dun really contact each other, but when we're single, we'll hang out together.
For me its the longing for companionship i guess? She's my movie kaki, shopping kaki, karaoke kaki, occasional clubbing kaki... We don't really have much in common, in fact we disagree on many things, but i always give in and endure her nonsense. Perhaps because i do think we are friends. Even when she insults and disrespects the things i love and cherish, i'll just pretend not to hear and just rub it off as her being HER. Afterall there ARE times when she is sweet. Rare as they are...
After all these years, she is still the way she was, and nothing i've said had any effect on her. Give me another 10 years and i doubt anything would change.
Sometimes i think i should just disappear from her life. But when i look at her and how she has no one to turn to at all, my heart softens and i can't bring myself to do it. Oh sure, she has friends. Mostly guy friends who keep trying to bed her.... True friends who would really care for her and not try to take advantage of her? 1? 2? But what is the point of me remaining when i can't make her see that the way she behaves and treats others is wrong? She has her own warped interpretation of everything every single time and refuses to accept what anyone says. In the end she would take our silence as our agreement with her view. In a way i'm agreeing with her and making her even more self-righteous...
So what should i do? It seems that every decision is wrong. Either i hurt her or i hurt myself, or i'll eventually hurt someone else...
Maybe someone has an answer? A sound advice? Or perhaps not... -
If I were U, I will choose the other one and nt someone who use me as a spare tyre...Originally posted by Justy:I've never lost my temper at anyone since i was 15... Its not really about reaching my limit. But rather a decision to move on or not to...