These are the unavoidable laws of the natural universe…
1. Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with
grease, your nose will begin to itch or you will have to pee.
2. Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the
least accessible corner.
3. Law of probability: The probability of ‘being watched’ is directly
proportional to the stupidity of your act.
4. Law of the Telephone: When you dial a wrong number, you never get
a busy signal.
5. Law of the Alibi: If you tell the boss you were late for work
because you had a flat tire, the very next morning or soon
thereafter, you will have a flat tire.
6. Variation Law: If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you
were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now.
(Happens every time).
7. Bath Theorem: When the body is fully immersed in water or in the
shower, the telephone rings.
8. Law of Close Encounters: The probability of meeting someone you
know increases when you are with someone you do not want to be seen
with.
9. Law of the Result: When you try to prove to someone that a machine
won’t work, it will.
10. Law of Biomechanics: The severity of the itch is inversely
proportional to the reach.
11. Theater Rule: At any event, the people whose seats are furthest
from the aisle arrive last.
12. Law of Coffee: As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee,
your boss will ask you to do something, which will last until the
coffee is cold.
13. Murphy’s Law of Lockers: If there are only two people in a locker
room, they will have adjacent lockers.
14. Law of Dirty Rugs/Carpets: The chances of an open-faced jelly
sandwich of landing face down on a floor covering are directly
correlated to the newness, color and cost of the carpet/rug.
15. Law of Location: No matter where you go, there you are.
16. Law of Logical Argument: Anything is possible if you don’t know
what you are talking about.
17. Brown’s Law: If the shoe fits, it’s ugly.
18. Wilson’s Law: As soon as you find a product that you really like,
they will stop making it.