"RESPECT" & "TRUST" ? ? ? What that all abt ? ? ?
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RESPECT??? TRUST??? does this word mean familiar to you? i have a fren who used to be in love with this guy but he keep complaining to my galfren that she never give respect to him never gain the trust from him... and so why should he give her too... i promise that i will help her explain this to her one day coz i myself oso cant explain these to her... it has so many meanings in them you see... she was so ignorant abt these two word's meaning and in the end they broke up... to my galfren, it's the word "respect" and "trust" that end their relationship up and till now, she dare not reali go into serious relationship and only keep thinking abt these word... can anyone tell me what this is abt???
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"Learn to forgive and forget, learn to give and take. Learn to be patient and kind to love and i promise you, love never fades..." -
In relationships, I guess ...
RESPECT would mean respecting the other person's privacy and respecting the other person's right to spend time alone or with his/her own family and friends;
TRUST would mean trusting that the other person would be faithful, trusting that the other person would not do anything to hurt yourself, and trusting that the other person would be frank and open to you.
Perhaps the guy feels that the girl isn't respecting his right to enjoy his own private life and isn't trusting enough in him. This is very unhealthy in a relationship. -
for me..
i guess these two factors r real impt in a r/s bcoz it needs the effort of both parties to keep it going. If one party has done something that made insecurity arise, trust wld be a big ???
to me..perhaps respect involves his pricacy. if u haf no trust, maybe there will be a tendency to invade his privacy to find out more. respect him as ur man not someone to show ur temper to when u r not in a gd mood. my ex once asked me--> why issit tat u will only show ur temper to mi instead of ur frenz? i guess i took him for granted bcoz tog for too long liao. Lastly, not only respect his private life, his 'brothers', frenz and parents etc... -
In relationship...
Respect - Giving the benefit of a doubt for things he/she does that you feel is not right.
Trust - Having the respect for him/her to know to do the right thing
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To me, RESPECT is to treat your other half in such a way that lets her know that she is the most important person in the world to you... e.g. telling her that you are going out with another girl and supplying the details voluntarily, instead of hiding it and thinking that she doesn't need to know. Or coming home slightly earlier from a guys' night out to spend time with her... Or not doing something that you want to do if she doesn't like you doing it, e.g. smoking, chionging, watching too many soccer matches (LP...
)...
TRUST for me is harder to come by... because I was scarred pretty badly before when I trusted one of my ex wholeheartedly and she cheated (kinda) behind my back... I'm working on it however...
It's basically an issue of faith in the other person that she is not cheating on you, and opening your heart to all the vulnerabilities, the risk of being hurt, if the trust you put out is violated... -
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Originally posted by Storm:
*clap clap for ur comment on respect... heehee
To me, [b]RESPECT is to treat your other half in such a way that lets her know that she is the most important person in the world to you... e.g. telling her that you are going out with another girl and supplying the details voluntarily, instead of hiding it and thinking that she doesn't need to know. Or coming home slightly earlier from a guys' night out to spend time with her... Or not doing something that you want to do if she doesn't like you doing it, e.g. smoking, chionging, watching too many soccer matches (LP... )...
TRUST for me is harder to come by... because I was scarred pretty badly before when I trusted one of my ex wholeheartedly and she cheated (kinda) behind my back... I'm working on it however...
It's basically an issue of faith in the other person that she is not cheating on you, and opening your heart to all the vulnerabilities, the risk of being hurt, if the trust you put out is violated...[/b]
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Originally posted by Storm:
*clap clap for ur comment on respect... heehee
To me, [b]RESPECT is to treat your other half in such a way that lets her know that she is the most important person in the world to you... e.g. telling her that you are going out with another girl and supplying the details voluntarily, instead of hiding it and thinking that she doesn't need to know. Or coming home slightly earlier from a guys' night out to spend time with her... Or not doing something that you want to do if she doesn't like you doing it, e.g. smoking, chionging, watching too many soccer matches (LP... )...
TRUST for me is harder to come by... because I was scarred pretty badly before when I trusted one of my ex wholeheartedly and she cheated (kinda) behind my back... I'm working on it however...
It's basically an issue of faith in the other person that she is not cheating on you, and opening your heart to all the vulnerabilities, the risk of being hurt, if the trust you put out is violated...[/b] -
Originally posted by snowf|akes*:*clap clap for ur comment on respect... heehee
but i don't quite agree with your sig ah snowflake... depends on the situation. can't always let something you love go away... e.g. If you love someone but the other person doesn't know, then you never do anything about it thinking that "If it's yours it's yours..." then you're being foolish in my opinion...
also, if you are already in a relationship and your other half is having second thoughts, and you let him/her go... well, I think what you should do is to identify what's happening. If he's straying because he's a b*stard, then by all means let him go. Otherwise, find out what's wrong with the relationship and try to save it! -
snowflake is a failure in r/s worOriginally posted by Storm:
but i don't quite agree with your sig ah snowflake... depends on the situation. can't always let something you love go away... e.g. If you love someone but the other person doesn't know, then you never do anything about it thinking that "If it's yours it's yours..." then you're being foolish in my opinion...
also, if you are already in a relationship and your other half is having second thoughts, and you let him/her go... well, I think what you should do is to identify what's happening. If he's straying because he's a b*stard, then by all means let him go. Otherwise, find out what's wrong with the relationship and try to save it!
i set 'him' & he came back 
i tot he was mine but he still left...
maybe my sig not beri true but to mi, setting someone i luv free & seeing that he got e happiness he wanted is gd enuf...
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I agree with this though... as I said, it all depends... sometimes have to let go. Sometimes have to hold on...Originally posted by snowf|akes*:maybe my sig not beri true but to mi, setting someone i luv free & seeing that he got e happiness he wanted is gd enuf...
Don't worry, just hang on in there. Someone will pop up from nowhere sometime... just as it did for me... -
Originally posted by Storm:I agree with this though... as I said, it all depends... sometimes have to let go. Sometimes have to hold on...
Don't worry, just hang on in there. Someone will pop up from nowhere sometime... just as it did for me... xie xie...still trying hard to hang on lar 
but my situation is real abnormal...couldn't believe it myself too... -
care to share? i'm sure there are many able aunt and uncle agonies here in this forum... but you don't have to of course!Originally posted by snowf|akes*: xie xie...still trying hard to hang on lar but my situation is real abnormal...couldn't believe it myself too...
anyway you're still young... born in 1984. makes you what... 18? you still have the whole world ahead of you! take it easy! -
In a relationship, Respect mean to respect each other and their friends, while trust is to trust them that they will always be faithful to u...
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anyway tis is my long story...(try to cut it short)
we've been tog for 1+ yrs, definitely haf gd & bad memories...but as time past, started to quarrel more often.
reasons: mainly becoz he goes clubbing every wkend...no objection to tis but what i'm angry was tat he's in NS & he spent too much $ on clubbing. Whenever we go out, i paid for most of the expenses. Help him abit in getting his license too. Bought N8310 for him when he lost his hp, another N8250 when he lost again. Its alrite if he really broke but i dun see any reason y he shd spend most of his $ on clubbing. Moreover whenever he's out wif his frenz he'll like MIA makes mi feel so insecure. And sometimes will becoz of clubbing dun wanna meet.
Eventually he initiated a break-up coz he said he can't take all these quarrellings (after a major quarrel abt something tat happened at a bbq--another long story haiz). He said he wanted freedom. So i let him go but in fact i was still waiting for him...
When we not tog i heard tat he quite close with some girls where i'm keeping away from others guys becoz i tot there's still a chance...
When i've decided to try to forget him he said he wanted a patch-up. I asked why he said becoz 'ying wei xiang zai yi qi'. Den patch lor...but after 3 days MIA until now. Msg him nv reply so i tot i got the hint & dun haf the courage to call him & asked clearly. Felt so 'ai wan' coz dunno the reason why it happens. Haiz... -
not just on respect n trust babe, also about compromising, about giving and taking
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well, he's not treating you with respect lor. happy be nice to you. not happy throw you one side.Originally posted by snowf|akes*:anyway tis is my long story...(try to cut it short)
you deserve better. it's a big ocean out there, with many fish... forget this ikan bilis -
wow u treat him so gd and he takes u for granted.. i tink he doesn't respect u..Originally posted by snowf|akes*:anyway tis is my long story...(try to cut it short)
we've been tog for 1+ yrs, definitely haf gd & bad memories...but as time past, started to quarrel more often.
reasons: mainly becoz he goes clubbing every wkend...no objection to tis but what i'm angry was tat he's in NS & he spent too much $ on clubbing. Whenever we go out, i paid for most of the expenses. Help him abit in getting his license too. Bought N8310 for him when he lost his hp, another N8250 when he lost again. Its alrite if he really broke but i dun see any reason y he shd spend most of his $ on clubbing. Moreover whenever he's out wif his frenz he'll like MIA makes mi feel so insecure. And sometimes will becoz of clubbing dun wanna meet.
Eventually he initiated a break-up coz he said he can't take all these quarrellings (after a major quarrel abt something tat happened at a bbq--another long story haiz). He said he wanted freedom. So i let him go but in fact i was still waiting for him...
When we not tog i heard tat he quite close with some girls where i'm keeping away from others guys becoz i tot there's still a chance...
When i've decided to try to forget him he said he wanted a patch-up. I asked why he said becoz 'ying wei xiang zai yi qi'. Den patch lor...but after 3 days MIA until now. Msg him nv reply so i tot i got the hint & dun haf the courage to call him & asked clearly. Felt so 'ai wan' coz dunno the reason why it happens. Haiz... -
haiz he wun understand one lar..he got his bike, brothers & freedom happy liao...but he has his gd points too larOriginally posted by Ah^ken:wow u treat him so gd and he takes u for granted.. i tink he doesn't respect u.. -
b]topic changed
Why do gals are not able to show these two things to guys???
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Well, sometimes, i myself feel that we gals cant blame all to guys... we should also learn to blame ourselves too... if not becoz of some things that we do that let them get suspicious or even sensitive, im sure guys wont behave in this way, agree???
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"Learn to forgive and forget, learn to give and take. Learn to be patient and kind and i promise you, love never fades..." -
tooooooooooooself centred i guesssOriginally posted by kabelgir|:b]topic changed
Why do gals are not able to show these two things to guys???
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Well, sometimes, i myself feel that we gals cant blame all to guys... we should also learn to blame ourselves too... if not becoz of some things that we do that let them get suspicious or even sensitive, im sure guys wont behave in this way, agree???
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"Learn to forgive and forget, learn to give and take. Learn to be
patient and kind and i promise you, love never fades..." -
Respect is external and can be seen visually. Trust is internal (hidden) and can only be felt.
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Originally posted by xavier1979:
Agreeable..
In relationships, I guess ...
[b]RESPECT would mean respecting the other person's privacy and respecting the other person's right to spend time alone or with his/her own family and friends;
TRUST would mean trusting that the other person would be faithful, trusting that the other person would not do anything to hurt yourself, and trusting that the other person would be frank and open to you.
Perhaps the guy feels that the girl isn't respecting his right to enjoy his own private life and isn't trusting enough in him. This is very unhealthy in a relationship.[/b]
Well.. To me.. Trust is more impt.. as w/o trust.. there will not be any foundation of the relationship at all.. Respect can be built.. but trust has to be there at all times.. the other party of urs mus learn to trust and not to be too possessive.. or else u wun haf ani breathing space..
Tell the guy to try to understand and tell ur galfriend to undestand tt guys nid a little more space too.. Try to give in alittle to accomdate both parties.
Agreed! -
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Granted, but trust must also be earned and maintained... Will you still be able to trust your boyfriend/girlfriend if she always goes out without telling you where and who avoids your questions? Or someone who openly flirts with other girls/guys especially behind your back?Originally posted by steph`-:Agreeable..
Well.. To me.. Trust is more impt.. as w/o trust.. there will not be any foundation of the relationship at all.. Respect can be built.. but trust has to be there at all times.. the other party of urs mus learn to trust and not to be too possessive.. or else u wun haf ani breathing space..
Tell the guy to try to understand and tell ur galfriend to undestand tt guys nid a little more space too.. Try to give in alittle to accomdate both parties.
Agreed!
To make someone trust you, I believe that one should be completely honest with the other person and be transparent... no hidden agendas, no secrets. Your actions must be constantly reinforcing the other party's trust in you, and therefore you must think before you do anything... It may take months or years to build up the trust, but one stupid action to destroy it all...
Trust cannot be blind. Faith cannot be blind. At least that's what I believe.