I find it hard to socialise with people because I am quiet.
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I find it hard to socialise with my OG members because I am quiet. Is anyone else like this?
I find it hard to join in their discussions and socialise and i find it hard to get on well with people.
Some of them I like to socialise because I find people friendly and approachable and down to earth, but the new students I have been in I find people more arrogant and in little cliques.
The girls in my OG are so outgoing that they are almost stupid, I find. I am not against what they do but they seem so immature but the funny thing is they get on well with everybody.
The OGLs seem to be so far up their asses and stuck up and do not take anyone seriously.
I am nice and polite to others but certain types of people I just do not get on well with. -
i used to think like you. but you need to realise socialisng and subsequently, networking, is a necessary platform to get you somewhere in life. snap out of it and get talking. you'll never know if you can find someone you can click with.
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me oso.
bt ppl tend to cm to me. -
somewhere is where??Originally posted by thousandisland:i used to think like you. but you need to realise socialisng and subsequently, networking, is a necessary platform to get you somewhere in life. snap out of it and get talking. you'll never know if you can find someone you can click with. -
u can't talk to pple becoz u hv no interest in most of the things in life...
if u feel passionate abt life and the things ard u... u shld b able to talk to pple de -
anywhere. you dont socialise or network how do you open doors for yourself.Originally posted by mudkipz:somewhere is where?? -
Just finished your Orientation in J1? Haha, don't worry, a lot of people face such problems. I can safely say I'm one of them, because I'm not exactly outgoing, and I don't usually talk to others unless needed or the situation demands it.
For now, I'd suggest you just hang out with your OG during breaks. If there's no real need to say anything, don't do/say anything which you might embarass yourself with. Watch, listen and offer some stuff at times.
You'll meet all sorts of people in life. A lot you will notice to be shallow, but remember, that's their problem. When you say the girls are immature, maybe it's because they're talking about things you find to be mundane, and there has to be a Lowest Common Denominator in conversations. Obviously, the mundane stuff will get to everyone, and so that could be why they seem to be getting along well with everyone else.
Your OGLs are J2s. They've got a lot of things like lectures and tutorials to worry about, so it might make them seem aloof. I know, because I'm a J2 myself and my OGL friends are all panicking and fretting over work. I suppose that's what separates the good OGLs from the rest of the heap; the ones who can worry about the new juniors are the better ones.
Take your time. Besides, you'll be having a class to hang out with soon, and I assure you, making friends in class is a lot easier than socializing in your OG. -
i am trying to, I really do value friendship greatly because they provide me mutual support during difficult times, respect, and sense of security but the problem is that we do not have similar interest, whenever i try to initiate a topic, they appeared bored or offended. My self-esteem is hurt and i felt really uncomfortable in a jc.Originally posted by thousandisland:i used to think like you. but you need to realise socialisng and subsequently, networking, is a necessary platform to get you somewhere in life. snap out of it and get talking. you'll never know if you can find someone you can click with. -
Re-read your posting again.Originally posted by qwerys:I find it hard to socialise with my OG members because I am quiet. Is anyone else like this?
I find it hard to join in their discussions and socialise and i find it hard to get on well with people.
Some of them I like to socialise because I find people friendly and approachable and down to earth, but the new students I have been in I find people more arrogant and in little cliques.
The girls in my OG are so outgoing that they are almost stupid, I find. I am not against what they do but they seem so immature but the funny thing is they get on well with everybody.
The OGLs seem to be so far up their asses and stuck up and do not take anyone seriously.
I am nice and polite to others but certain types of people I just do not get on well with.
Why are you being judgemental and grouping them as this and that?
With this kind of thinking, it will affect the way you behave towards them.
On the other hand, they are probably not as stupid etc as you think they are. How deep do you really know them ? I probably guess you are judging them on the surface?
Don't judge people. Don't judge yourself. Be kind to yourself and others and others will be kind to you. JC life can be fun and a phrase in life where it provides another opportunity for you to make new friends, a avenue to change yourself to be a better person.
There is nothing wrong being quiet. There are all sorts of people with flaws and beauty so accept them as who they are.. included yourself.
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open yourself up..
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Just try to talk on common topics?
Soccer quite a hot topic in my group. Even some girls watch it la
Joke around laugh also can -
What JC? Im also J1 this year,you can read my thread in whinehouse. You have any secondary sch friends in your JC? Don have to start new topic just listen and add in your views and stay true to yourself.Don be influenced by others like talking like them. Be you.Originally posted by qwerys:i am trying to, I really do value friendship greatly because they provide me mutual support during difficult times, respect, and sense of security but the problem is that we do not have similar interest, whenever i try to initiate a topic, they appeared bored or offended. My self-esteem is hurt and i felt really uncomfortable in a jc. -
jc sucks la. jus study hard, get promoted, study real hard,graduate with flying colors.get e hell out of jc. =X
im lonely in jc too and i cant wait to get out of it.
*sighs*
u sound lk me..r u frm ny?lol -
HEY, im an OGL and this is what i've noticed.
in an OG, those who started talking and playing are actually the ones who are more sociable. your topic says it all, you find it hard to socialise with people because you are quiet. and thats it! if you dont talk, hardly will anyone come and talk to you. you're 16 going 17 now nobody has to teach you how to talk right.
as for me, i make an effort to talk to all my og members and understand them and whether they're coping in school. i wish you all the best! -
If you think that they appear bored, change topic or listen to what they are saying. hmm, no need to have similar interest then be friend. Anyone can be friends. Why not try to be open-minded and receptive of what is going on. Share with others your joy and happiness. Share with others of what your knowledge. smile.Originally posted by qwerys:i am trying to, I really do value friendship greatly because they provide me mutual support during difficult times, respect, and sense of security but the problem is that we do not have similar interest, whenever i try to initiate a topic, they appeared bored or offended. My self-esteem is hurt and i felt really uncomfortable in a jc. -
aku quiet guy also leh
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you cannot completely be quiet.
Its just like example i am in this thread, this forum.
most people dont know me. But if i wanna make myself famous its easy, like posting alot, creating threads, giving my views giving reply.
Whereas in real life you must speak more, do more action. Get people to look at you.. etc... You need to find a "base" means better friends who you can talk to, go out with...
After you got the "base" you can expand the "base" and get ppl to join your clique and you all can be very good friends. Not necessary that you need get people to join you, you can always join people do.
Be flexible, the world is in your hands. -
Originally posted by Hello Kitty:me oso.
bt ppl tend to cm to me.
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nt onli you all lor,mi also a guai guai quite guy
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Orientation is such a short phase only, worry what?
Come back only when you have problems with your classmates. -
why do you have no friends? you answered your own questions. your arrogance is the main reason why you cant seem to get along with anyone. you dont truly know a person unless you have spent a considerable amount of time interacting with the person. if you dont start being humble you'll find that you understand no one and no one will bother to understand you.Originally posted by qwerys:I find it hard to socialise with my OG members because I am quiet. Is anyone else like this?
I find it hard to join in their discussions and socialise and i find it hard to get on well with people.
Some of them I like to socialise because I find people friendly and approachable and down to earth, but the new students I have been in I find people more arrogant and in little cliques.
The girls in my OG are so outgoing that they are almost stupid, I find. I am not against what they do but they seem so immature but the funny thing is they get on well with everybody.
The OGLs seem to be so far up their asses and stuck up and do not take anyone seriously.
I am nice and polite to others but certain types of people I just do not get on well with. -
i think that for a person, there are certain groups of people that cannot click with you though. i do not know you so i can't say for sure on the reason why though.
i guess then i will talk about me then. i'm quiet around people that i do not know very well and around people that i cannot click with but on the other hand i can quite talkative and joke around with people that i'm comfortable with or around with people that i can click with though.
so i guess just be more open about yourself so that other will open up to you as well. Even though you do not understand those jokes or anything, i guess just listen and try to get to know them more. communication is quite important though. dun look it as socializing but look it as you want to get to knoe someone better. If you are really sincere to know someone, they can feel it though -
You know the problem right? Then work on it!Originally posted by qwerys:I find it hard to socialise with my OG members because I am quiet. Is anyone else like this?
I find it hard to join in their discussions and socialise and i find it hard to get on well with people.
Some of them I like to socialise because I find people friendly and approachable and down to earth, but the new students I have been in I find people more arrogant and in little cliques.
The girls in my OG are so outgoing that they are almost stupid, I find. I am not against what they do but they seem so immature but the funny thing is they get on well with everybody.
The OGLs seem to be so far up their asses and stuck up and do not take anyone seriously.
I am nice and polite to others but certain types of people I just do not get on well with.
I beg to differ the part about cliques, you sound jealous.
If being immature will get you to know more people, then why not! You are not a working adult... enjoy when you still can! So what if you are 16 and still immature! Its much better then being 50+ and immature right!?? -
i used to be like you.
then i had to dumb myself down so that other ple could understand me better.
ah... the repercussions of being overly smart.
just remember that not everyone can catch your train of thought.
and relax abit. dun take everything too serious or at face value. -
Social interaction can be trained. Set time aside to be in a public situation.
Set a goal that you will speak to 3 people and find out:
1. What is their name.
2. What is their favorite food.
3. What is the name of one of their friends.
The rule is you cannot ask them outright. Instead you have to find ways to get them to volunteer the information.
This game has a time limit of 10 minutes. At the end of 10 minutes thank them for their time and leave.
Doing this periodically will help you develop your skill in social interaction.