A man was sitting in an aeroplane seat when he noticed his old
friend sitting behind him. The man immediately got up and greeted
this friend behind him. After that, the pilot made an announcement.
The man, realising that the pilot was also his friend, went to the
c ockpit to greet the pilot, who happened to have the same name as
his old friend. However, the man was taken away by the FBI and CIA
after he greeted the pilot. Why?

Ans: HI JACK!



Osama bin Ladin, W. George Bush, Saddam Hussein and Tony Blair were
playing mahjong. Who wins 1st?

Ans: Saddam, cuz he 'hu xian' (Chinese)



Someone accidentally dropped a dumpling onto the ground. Who will
pick up the dumpling?

Ans: Xiang Long Shi Ba Zang (Descending Dragon pick up Dumpling)

How do prawns laugh?

Ans: Hei hei hei (prawn)



Which Chinese Emperor in history is bilnd?

Ans: Kang Xi (Can't see)



Which Chinese host dun hav centre parting?

Ans: Wu Zong Xian (Jacky Wu)



Why can't foxes (hu li) climb trees?

Ans: Because foxes are 'Jiao3 Hua2'

Once upon a time there are 2 bros Da Ming and Xiao Ming. Xiao Ming grew up by drinking milk everyday. What does Da Ming drink, then?

Ans: Wine (Jiu3 Yang3 Da4 Ming2)



Among Xiao Hong, Xiao Bai, Xiao Hei, Xiao Lan, Xiao Huang, who cannot tahan roller-coasters?

Ans: Xiao Bai!! Cuz Xiao Bai Tu!! (little white rabbit) which also means xiao bai vomits

all hear before liao

got new one onot

LOL not bad.

btw for the question 'Which Chinese host dun hav centre parting?'

Jacky's surname should be Wu not Ng.

Originally posted by FireIce:

all hear before liao

got new one onot

u watch a lot of taiwan variety shows right? especially from kang kang.

Originally posted by Gordonator:

u watch a lot of taiwan variety shows right? especially from kang kang.

not relli

i get them in my emails
and hear from my frens.....

Originally posted by FireIce:

all hear before liao

got new one onot

If you got new one, remember to share with us hor!

i know alot of these jokes got play during those taiwanese shows..

Originally posted by stellazio:

i know alot of these jokes got play during those taiwanese shows..

You must be super fan of those taiwanese variety shows.

Share with us lo.

Originally posted by FireIce:

all hear before liao

got new one onot

i neber hear before leh...
what are the answers?

um..highlight the part after “Answer”: its in white

Originally posted by angelfairy:

um..highlight the part after "Answer": its in white

ah
dumb dumb me...

Originally posted by stellazio:

i know alot of these jokes got play during those taiwanese shows..

especially from kang kang.

Originally posted by Gordonator:

LOL not bad.

btw for the question 'Which Chinese host dun hav centre parting?'

Jacky's surname should be Wu not Ng.

I have corrected it.

Q.One day there's this really old horse walking along a road. Suddenly, he stopped. Why?

A: He just realised he is a toy horse.

Originally posted by heavenscloud:

Q.One day there's this really old horse walking along a road. Suddenly, he stopped. Why?

A: He just realised he is a toy horse.

I never know the horse can walk. Actually what is the correct term to use huh? I forget liao.

An ant knocks the door of a HDB flat. House owner opens the door. "I want a place to stay", said the ant . "I have a vacant room which you can occupy for free of cost", said the owner. Ant went inside and occupied that vacant room. After some days, the ant brought in another ant and requested the owner "Can you please allow this ant to stay along with me". "Oh sure, you can do so without paying any rent" said the owner. After some days the ant brought one more ant and requested the owner to allow that ant to stay with it. Owner agreed to it without asking for any rent. This continued i.e ant brings in one more ant and owner agrees for it. On one fine day, the ant brought in tenth ant and requested the owner to allow that tenth ant also to stay with it. The owner said "Ok, you all can stay here but you need to pay rent". Now the question is Why did the owner ask for rent when the tenth ant came in?

Ans: Because they are now Tenants (Ten ants)

Originally posted by whereismyrib:

An ant knocks the door of a HDB flat. House owner opens the door. "I want a place to stay", said the ant . "I have a vacant room which you can occupy for free of cost", said the owner. Ant went inside and occupied that vacant room. After some days, the ant brought in another ant and requested the owner "Can you please allow this ant to stay along with me". "Oh sure, you can do so without paying any rent" said the owner. After some days the ant brought one more ant and requested the owner to allow that ant to stay with it. Owner agreed to it without asking for any rent. This continued i.e ant brings in one more ant and owner agrees for it. On one fine day, the ant brought in tenth ant and requested the owner to allow that tenth ant also to stay with it. The owner said "Ok, you all can stay here but you need to pay rent". Now the question is Why did the owner ask for rent when the tenth ant came in?

Ans: (will be given later) does anyone know the answer?

tenants

How do u know which of the 8 tentacles of an Octopus are it's hands and which are it's legs?

Ans: Knock the octopus on its head, the tectacles that rasies to massage its head are its hands.

Originally posted by kenshin_himura:

tenants

You are right. I guess you have heard before ba.

Since you are the only contestant, I shall put up the answer now.

Originally posted by whereismyrib:

You are right. I guess you have heard before ba.

Since you are the only contestant, I shall put up the answer now.

lol never hear be4 leh.. just came to my mind 10 ants = tenants

Originally posted by kenshin_himura:

lol never hear be4 leh.. just came to my mind 10 ants = tenants

*Thumb up*

Why is fish cunning ?
Ans: cos yu pian mi fen (fish lie to bee hoon) actual :fish beehoon



Why Zhou Jie Lun Cross the Street Kana fine by police?
Ans: Cos Jay Walking actual :english name is Jay Chow



How does a fish laugh?
Ans: HE HE HE



Which animal should you look for if you're unable to open a bottle cap?
Ans: peac ock, cos kong que kai ping (peac ock open bottle)



Why baby don't need to brush teeth?
Ans: cos bei bi wu chi (baby no teeth) actual :despicable

LOL! the above ones are funny, especially the jay chou one.