An end of a relationship that lasted eleven years Â…
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Originally posted by _Aaron_:As quoted in Bar:
This may sound a bit of a coincidence, but i've actually read this before in a book.(The major points of it are the same.)
Guy meets Girl.
Guy woos Girl.
Eventually proposed.
Guy introduces Girl to Job.
Girl grows Independent.
Girl thinks Guy made her that way, and is indebted to him.
Girl suddenly feels stressful when around Guy.
No. There's nothing you did wrong. Its circumstances that made your relationship into what it is now.
Perhaps, if i were to dive into her mind, i would find that she has separated her life into 2 parts. Pre-Success, and Post-Success.
She's enjoying her post-success life right now, and you're not in it. In fact, you're very dormant in her Pre-Success life.
She doesn't want to be reminded of it everyday, when she looks at you. And she may be feeling a bit guilty that she's throwing away her love, for her success. That's why she's feeling stressed.
In the book, the guy eventually let her go, but that's because he didn't really love her in the first place.
Maybe you would like to reverse that scenario in real life. But how..?
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Judging from your 2nd long entry. It does seem like there's little hope of her coming back to you, and that she has moved on.
You're right, the Post-Success her wants to make all the decisions now. What can you do? Nothing. Nothing but to stand by her and perhaps her finally realising that you've always been by her side. And perhaps, after she eventually sees the light, she'll come back to you (This may or may not happen at all. The chances of it happening should be apparant to you.)
Now that you're in financial difficulty, i suggest you prioritise and get out of the dumps. Only when you're back on track, do you go back to her. Don't sms her so often anymore, let her have her own life, since her current life doesn't have you in it...
Once again, get your life back on track first, before thinking about her.
... We need Yunhaier~~ Someone summon her.~
WTH? 
/me is only summonable during weekends until schedule changes, somewhere early March next year 
Cheers -
Originally posted by Yunhaier: WTH?
/me is only summonable during weekends until schedule changes, somewhere early March next year
Cheers
Huh? So no one summoned you..?
Hmm, actually we should have seen that you're a female long ago. Your thoughts are generally on a different direction from ours... though it usually makes the most sense.
Well, see you around~ Cheerios~ -
-faint-Originally posted by _Aaron_: Huh? So no one summoned you..?
Hmm, actually we should have seen that you're a female long ago. Your thoughts are generally on a different direction from ours... though it usually makes the most sense.
Well, see you around~ Cheerios~
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Well if u truly love someone, then her happiness shld b the utmost consideration, isn't it? In that case, sometimes letting go is the ultimate, though painful decision to take...Originally posted by ettitus:If you truly love someone, leaving is not an option. Put it this way, if one of these days, your loved one got raped. She might want to leave you because she feels "insulted", and no longer suit this world. But are you going to leave her just because she is trying all means and ways to leave you? Just an illustration thou.
Maybe I may not be right, but what if there are really something I must know but do not know! She chose this option because she is confused! I'm not taking chances, and all I want is to find out the real problem. Perhaps one of these days, when I finally realised that the love is over, then maybe leaving is an option ...
Some ppl advise u to move on, some ppl advise u to try again. My advice to u is take a step back n let things proceed naturally. Ur over eagerness to revert things to how they were b4 will only make things worse n deepen her resolve to end the r/s. Let some time pass, recollecting both ur thoughts n have an amiacable talk abt the r/s. Accept her final decision and let go of seeking the truth. Some things r best left unspoken.
Loving is abt giving.... n if u truly love her as u claim, then if her happiness is not with u, it's time to let her go if that's her final decision. -
Dear all,Originally posted by mercutioz:Well if u truly love someone, then her happiness shld b the utmost consideration, isn't it? In that case, sometimes letting go is the ultimate, though painful decision to take...
Some ppl advise u to move on, some ppl advise u to try again. My advice to u is take a step back n let things proceed naturally. Ur over eagerness to revert things to how they were b4 will only make things worse n deepen her resolve to end the r/s. Let some time pass, recollecting both ur thoughts n have an amiacable talk abt the r/s. Accept her final decision and let go of seeking the truth. Some things r best left unspoken.
Loving is abt giving.... n if u truly love her as u claim, then if her happiness is not with u, it's time to let her go if that's her final decision.
I sincerely thank you all for your time and effort rendered. Sorry that I had not replied to the forum for so long - I was hospitalised after an alcohol binge. Well, yes I was drinking a lot because when I was at Orchard, many memories came back to me again ... I think the 5 days in hospital really does help.
As much as possible, I will not be giving up this relationship, not without even fighting for it. I have been waiting for many years before getting together, and I think its that feeling of 'boredom' that's making me lose my patience towards the relationship now. I guess time really is the best medicine now. Its time I let go a bit and let the bird out of the cage. Whether or not this bird decides to leave or stay, its up to fate! Maybe another bird will fly by again, a better bird ...
Thank you all again for your help rendered once again. It was much appreciated.