trust
-
do u trust yr gf/bf?? hw much u trust her/him?
wad cause u to trust yr partner?
wad cause r/s to last?
wad do have doubt on yr partner?
how to gain trust in r/s?
do u tell yr partner everything : yr sadness and happiness?
hw u solve if problem occurr?
wad is most important in maintaining a r/s?
wad makes u fall in love wif yr partner?
can you tell n explain to mi why whenever i smsed him he nv replied
whenever i called him he didnt ans or the conservation wont last more than 15 minutes i'm hurt but i always pretend nothing has happen in front of him cos i dun wan him to see sad and feel pressured due to mi wad should i do nw ... i'm loss totally loss
can ani1 give mi some solution on some of those Qn above .....
thks -
hmmm...I have a problem with trusting as well...
like I tend to go over the top whenever I havent seen him for a while, when he hasn't replied to my mail, stuff like dat...
but now I try to trust him more, I mean if there is no trust in a relationship, then it wudn't last..
I think communication shud help in building trust between couples...
i.c.y -
Sometimes, the more you trust him, the more hurt you will get when you discovered the truth...
-
ya i do agree wif that ... dun ever thrust someone 100% ....Originally posted by Ayla:Sometimes, the more you trust him, the more hurt you will get when you discovered the truth...
it may be selfish but it help in certain ways -
ya...stm u tink u trust him so u don wanna ask him y y y whenever he did sth...but who knows when u din wanna ask he actuali got ting hidden from u? aiya love very difficult...trust also...u may tink don wanna ask hikm ting means trust...scarely he tink u don care abt him liao then he go have affair and u stil don wanna ask...how?
-
agreed. totally.Originally posted by Ayla:Sometimes, the more you trust him, the more hurt you will get when you discovered the truth... 
-
TRusT?
so hard to trust someone that don trust u.
learn how to trust "trust" . -
Originally posted by jolin80:
do u trust yr gf/bf?? hw much u trust her/him?
Yes. Alot.
wad cause u to trust yr partner?
It's a choice. So far, she well-deserves it. We're very open in the relationship. Little things that we need to hide from each other...
wad cause r/s to last?
Trust. Compatibility. Reason(s) to be together. Interest.
wad do have doubt on yr partner?
Don't quite get this question.
how to gain trust in r/s?
TRANSPARENCY. But note. Not everybody can take that. The other is by the things that you do. Self-discipline?
do u tell yr partner everything : yr sadness and happiness?
From time to time, I do tell her quite alot of things deep within myself. One main reason being that I find that she is one of the rare one who can truly understand what I've got to be. Be it good or bad. Though she's my gf, she just accepts me as I am. I feel very comfortable in sharing most of my things with her. I'm a DEVIL. I feel great POWER. She doesn't really display alot of that. But most of her is 'inwards' to me. She earns much RESPECT from me.
She tells me alot too.
hw u solve if problem occurr?
Depends on big or small issues. Always ask yourself this question. "Is your relationship more important or the problem more important?" It doesn't mean not solving or handling things at all. That would probably lead to more problems. But could things be set aside for a while?
Small issues. I believe our love is enough to overwhelm it. Doesn't really matter who's right and who's wrong. I'm usually more concerned with issues which might affect stability of the relationship. Often discuss about it. She understands my genuine concern. Often we talk it through or she'll heed my advice.
wad is most important in maintaining a r/s?
Depends on the couple. Other than that Trust is often an important issue.
wad makes u fall in love wif yr partner?
Choice. Comfortable. Respect. Freedom. Compatibility. Trust. Understanding. Just the way she is.
can you tell n explain to mi why whenever i smsed him he nv replied
whenever i called him he didnt ans or the conservation wont last more than 15 minutes i'm hurt but i always pretend nothing has happen in front of him cos i dun wan him to see sad and feel pressured due to mi wad should i do nw ... i'm loss totally loss
can ani1 give mi some solution on some of those Qn above .....
To me. It doesn't matter if it's 15 mins. Or just a word or 2. Have you seen couples who can do just nothing but stare into each other for hours... Enjoying the company...?
Couples just doing their own things yet love each other much...? Couples which quarrels every now and then or to cuddle each other in the end...?
Love is what you and him defines it to be... If it don't happen... MAKE IT HAPPEN...?
[/b] -
True.Originally posted by icyprincess:hmmm...I have a problem with trusting as well...
like I tend to go over the top whenever I havent seen him for a while, when he hasn't replied to my mail, stuff like dat...
but now I try to trust him more, I mean if there is no trust in a relationship, then it wudn't last..
I think communication shud help in building trust between couples...
i.c.y
When there's no trust in a relationship, it won't last.
So... what to do instead?
Focus on building a friendship first. Without friendship, there's no relationship!
S.H.I.N. -
I do not trust anyone, including family. Only trusted my dog. Cannot and will not trust any humans. Pathetic species damn human beings
-
trust.
something i didnt give enough to her.
it contributed to the end of the r/s. -
ALl i can say is, Trust is something that you must give to a person you love a %100.
Once you have given it your all, U will tell yourself that i never trust him/her enough or I never Love him/her enough.
This will not make u regret. Its just a way to seperate a good guy/gal from the herd.
Those who are often hurt often don't trust easily. Its just simple basic instinct. Once bitten Twice Shy. Heard of it?
In the Previous replies of the Thread
Like
Ayla:
" Sometimes, the more you trust him, the more hurt you will get when you discovered the truth... "
There are truth in this very sentence yet it is full of unspoken happyness. Cause The feelings there are left without regrets. You will know when you have giving it your all, if the guy doesn't cherish you. He's losing a very good life partner who trust him completely.
$e@wEeD:
"ya...stm u tink u trust him so u don wanna ask him y y y whenever he did sth...but who knows when u din wanna ask he actuali got ting hidden from u? aiya love very difficult...trust also...u may tink don wanna ask hikm ting means trust...scarely he tink u don care abt him liao then he go have affair and u stil don wanna ask...how? "
Like $e@wEeD have said These thing will happen. So will you trust or not ? Because that's the guy you have chosen to spend your present part of your life with. Maybe you are going ot spent your future with him too. So its ur decision.
My personal Advice to this issue is, just ask him if he still loves you. That will be a simple and effective solution. Tell him that you have felt that you are drifting apart ( assuming From the descriptions of the things happening ). Ask for a Explantion. ITs ur right.
Cheers Lady. Good Luck...
Regards Sekundes AkA
-
Not always true....Originally posted by keuriseudo:True.
When there's no trust in a relationship, it won't last.
So... what to do instead?
Focus on building a friendship first. Without friendship, there's no relationship!
S.H.I.N. -
Hmm..Originally posted by EvilDead:I do not trust anyone, including family. Only trusted my dog. Cannot and will not trust any humans. Pathetic species damn human beings 
-
well said~ i think i start to trust my dog also better to trust human being~Originally posted by EvilDead:I do not trust anyone, including family. Only trusted my dog. Cannot and will not trust any humans. Pathetic species damn human beings -
Well.. sorry i didn't elaborate on that, but in short, you shouldn't see that phrase too logically.Originally posted by Devil1976:Not always true....
Let me explain, when there's no friendship in the first place, can you bring the relationship to a next level?
The friendship phase is the important phase where people first build their trust in. It's also the beginning of trust in that friendship kind of relationship. Why would I bother to befriend you if I don't trust you in the first place? What makes you think a friendship will form without trust? Thus, if there's not even a single bit of trust in such a simple friendship between two or even more people, what makes you think that bringing the relationship to the next level will result in better trust?
It doesn't work that way. It's always best to take things a step at a time before taking things to the next level. Hence, I feel sorry for those lovers who go too fast.
yours faithfully,
S.H.I.N. -
Originally posted by keuriseudo:Well.. sorry i didn't elaborate on that, but in short, you shouldn't see that phrase too logically.
Let me explain, when there's no friendship in the first place, can you bring the relationship to a next level?
The friendship phase is the important phase where people first build their trust in. It's also the beginning of trust in that friendship kind of relationship. Why would I bother to befriend you if I don't trust you in the first place? What makes you think a friendship will form without trust? Thus, if there's not even a single bit of trust in such a simple friendship between two or even more people, what makes you think that bringing the relationship to the next level will result in better trust?
It doesn't work that way. It's always best to take things a step at a time before taking things to the next level. Hence, I feel sorry for those lovers who go too fast.
yours faithfully,
S.H.I.N. -
there's lack of trust, and there's the existence of fear, fear of losing someone dear to u, that's wat causes the hurt...Originally posted by jolin80:can you tell n explain to mi why whenever i smsed him he nv replied
whenever i called him he didnt ans or the conservation wont last more than 15 minutes i'm hurt but i always pretend nothing has happen in front of him cos i dun wan him to see sad and feel pressured due to mi wad should i do nw ... i'm loss totally loss
can ani1 give mi some solution on some of those Qn above .....
thks
u shouldn't pretend that nothing happened, in the long run, u're only hurting urself, and if one day u break down, it isn't ur bf's fault, coz in the first place, he might have totally no idea how u were feeling since u never did told him. Have a good talk with him on this, i'm sure it'll help -
This is something that couples, even married ones always fail to see that is a mistake...Originally posted by jolin80:i'm hurt but i always pretend nothing has happen in front of him cos i dun wan him to see sad and feel pressured due to mi wad should i do nw ... i'm loss totally loss
By not bring the matter up, the other party will not know. While u are continuously affected by this issue, u will show it out eventually but your partner will not know why. Then there will come to a point of him complaining why u are so unreasonable or something, getting angry over small small things while actually u r angry due to the accumulation of anger from many many events. Pls solve this first.
U may be afraid that by bring it up will affect the r/s between u 2. But room for discussion and respecting each other's feelings is an impt part in r/s. U will never want someone who dont care abt ur feelings as a bf also right? So sometimes by bringing up such matters which u think shld nv be brought up will imporve the r/s.
Trust is a choice. Everyone starts a r/s with others with different amount of trust. Some start with complete trust, some no trust, some in the middle. This is then build up or reduced when u analyse his/her actions when interacting with u or others. -
Trust = [Communication + honesty + Emotionally Secured]Originally posted by jolin80:can you tell n explain to mi why whenever i smsed him he nv replied
whenever i called him he didnt ans or the conservation wont last more than 15 minutes i'm hurt but i always pretend nothing has happen in front of him cos i dun wan him to see sad and feel pressured due to mi wad should i do nw ... i'm loss totally loss
can ani1 give mi some solution on some of those Qn above .....
thks
If you lose any of the factor in the equation...then why are you talking about trust? What is trust in your defination then? Having expectations isn't wrong, but without letting your partner know about it is wrong.
It's just like taking everything upon yourself and tot you've been a victim of a relationship. (This applies to many girls to claims that they don't trust men.)
At one point i understand why you need to pretend...but it will not solve the above qns.
The methodology of gaining a trusty r/s is GOOD communication.
You need to redefine what 'TRUST' is and your 'TRUST' in him.
Cheers. -
wooo hooooo!!!!!Originally posted by Danisdead101times:well said~ i think i start to trust my dog also better to trust human being~ -
1. I trust my partner.. it seems natural for me to do so when i love sb..Originally posted by jolin80:do u trust yr gf/bf?? hw much u trust her/him?
wad cause u to trust yr partner?
wad cause r/s to last?
wad do have doubt on yr partner?
how to gain trust in r/s?
do u tell yr partner everything : yr sadness and happiness?
hw u solve if problem occurr?
wad is most important in maintaining a r/s?
wad makes u fall in love wif yr partner?
can you tell n explain to mi why whenever i smsed him he nv replied
whenever i called him he didnt ans or the conservation wont last more than 15 minutes i'm hurt but i always pretend nothing has happen in front of him cos i dun wan him to see sad and feel pressured due to mi wad should i do nw ... i'm loss totally loss
can ani1 give mi some solution on some of those Qn above .....
thks
2. i tink the bedrock of relationship is trust n honesty.. i'm not talking abt lies over minute issues but those tt concerns the relationship
3. nope.. somehow i feel very assured by her at the moment.. but i guess i somehow cant give her the same feeling though.. even i have admitted to her tt i dun even trust myself.. dunno y.. maybe i'm a person who is scared of commitment.. could be bcoz of past hurtful relationships maybe..
4. thru actions i guess. action speaks louder den words.. can be a small gesture to start with..
5. sadly i dun.. i'm the sort of person who bottles things up..
6. we thrash it out.. discuss.. clear things up..
7. trust n honesty again.. spending time together doesnt necessary mean tt ur relationship can weather all storms.. time spent is not crucial but still impt though..
8. i duno.. it happens.. personally i fill liking sb is not over a particular trait or attribute but juz a intangible chemistry n attraction..
the part abt not replying sms n talking little on the phone sounds like my gf..
hmm.. he could be busy.. but i guess u have to be less dependent on him.. the fear is tt u might give him too much pressure by possibly being too possessive..
for me i always tell my gf i cant always be physically there for her.. but emotionally i will..
u can try to talk to him regarding this topic.. both or u should be able to talk over issues.. tt's wat a relationship should be.. -
Originally posted by jolin80:do u trust yr gf/bf?? hw much u trust her/him?
Single now. But most of the time, i give 100% trust. Unless he deceived me before.
wad cause u to trust yr partner?
Because I love him.
wad cause r/s to last?
I wish to know also.
wad do have doubt on yr partner?
huh?
how to gain trust in r/s?
Be honest with each other. Dun hide anything? No lies.
do u tell yr partner everything : yr sadness and happiness?
Yes..but if he is the one who make me sad..Maybe I'll not tell him..tolerate as much as I could?
hw u solve if problem occurr?
Thrash it out and talk. Hehe..but it's not advisable. I'm just too impulsive.
wad is most important in maintaining a r/s?
Trust, breathing space, understanding, able to accept each other's flaws?
wad makes u fall in love wif yr partner?
Single now. Different causes. Most of the time, it's the care and love that I feel?
can you tell n explain to mi why whenever i smsed him he nv replied
whenever i called him he didnt ans or the conservation wont last more than 15 minutes i'm hurt but i always pretend nothing has happen in front of him cos i dun wan him to see sad and feel pressured due to mi wad should i do nw ... i'm loss totally loss
I think his feelings for you is slowly fading? Or he is pulling away from you? What happened before this? Think about it.
can ani1 give mi some solution on some of those Qn above .....
thks
I empathise with you..the part that you pretend nothing has happened tho you are hurt..But sometimes, it's better to make your feelings known? Release yourself and also find out why he treats you that way? -
he's probably bonking another chick behind your back...Originally posted by icyprincess:hmmm...I have a problem with trusting as well...
like I tend to go over the top whenever I havent seen him for a while, when he hasn't replied to my mail, stuff like dat...
but now I try to trust him more, I mean if there is no trust in a relationship, then it wudn't last..
I think communication shud help in building trust between couples...
i.c.y -
sometimes maybe that her bf is really busy in his workOriginally posted by mahai102:he's probably bonking another chick behind your back...
not all ppl work are the same
same have lots to do, so can be very free
life is unfair
so dont compare you yourself to others