How many times will u break your love ones heart b4 u learn
-
I really dunno how to describe the feelings i have now...Something would be close would be.
numb , dull , empty , void , dazed
For 1 1/2 years i have been with a gal i love , everything was perfect in the beginning , till late last year . She started her own travel agency and begin diggin herself into work. Sms and calls drizzle to a minimal , sometimes she would disappear for hours or sometimes 1-2 days , sms becomes almost non-existant or no picking up of calls or returns. "Be patient i tell myself , she's busy with work " and i know she is , and i always hope things would get better. But it din , our dates gets cancelled , postponed , she forgets special days. All she can say is "i m sorry , tied up with work" again n again.
Be patient i tell myself , over n over again.
And still things look gloomy , i tried to talk to her, abt us distancing , and the amount of time we do not have for each other . And she acknowledges that, but all she can do is cry and say sorry.
Be patient , one day i ll see the light at the tunnel . I know i will , i tell myself , when the coldest n loneliest night i bear alone.
till now ,
She skipped valentine's day , not a card , not a gift , say she's not feeling well . Its alrite i tell her , i took a week to choose a gift for her , a card and a rose . I dont mind , its okie hun , no worries. She say she get something for me for chinese valentine , to make it up .
We had planned a previous month b4 going to koh samui today coz tommorrow is my birthday , she suggested and arrange for a trip for me.
For one month i was happy and excited for this trip.I even took 3 days leave.
I had my hair cut , my teeth clean at the dentist , bought a lot of beach wear . Pack everything early.
Till the day b4 yesterday , she disappeared again , sms me telling me she's busy , will call me back . never did.
And yesterday , the day we suppose to fly off to koh samui. She msg me in the morning she's also busy. I forgotten how many times i called and left msges and sms her. and i well knew she might not be able to make it..
I left home alone hoping last min she would call me , and i sat at the departure hall alone . waiting for some miracle to happen. i check the plane tix booking , it never showed our names . Somehow the internet booking never went tru , i have ask her to double check with airlines twice , guess she never did.
So i sat there waitin ...alone...hoping its a mistake and she has a valid reason to be missing. While i m worried sick for 2 days ..
finally the sms came , 1 hour b4 departure. She's Stuck with work and cannot make it anymore , she's very upset n sorry.
I was dumb founded.....somehow in my heart i knew it was the last chance i would give to her. and she failed to make it.
I sms her , "its over"
She reply "wat you mean ? are you leaving me?"
I sms her " I didnt leave you , you leave me long ago , you just dont realise it , i m no longer no 1 in your life , your clients more important than me"
she replied " i m so sorry"
I sat there for the next few hours , looking our flight fly away.staring into the emptiness of the viewhall. Thinking wad did i wrong , why did my relationship fail. How can things turn out like this , when i devote my love n life to her and she treats me like dirt , not even the basic respect of a fren.
How can i be so low ? i msg her so many questions , and she never answered any ...she just says she's sorry.
so i began to walk ...took the train to town , look for a fren , then went off to buy beers and sat near the river. I called my closest frens , and started to cry.alcohol does make a man lose his emotional control. I spend the next few hours staring into the river n thinking wad went wrong. And i called her , many times again , she prob do not dare to pick up the phone. As if i m in the wrong , why m i still trying to call her?
So i took my luggage and walk the streets alone again , till my mind was so dazed and took a cab home n slept.
I woke up this morning hoping its all dream...but it isnt.. just a feeling of nothingness...She msg me while i was sleeping , telling she knows she hurt me deeply and will leave me for good this time.
I did not reply to that.
How can she treat someone she said she love so deeply n truely . Becoz she cant disappoint her clients , but she can break her promises n disappoint me .
Again and again n again , coz she knows i will forgive her.
How many times will u break your love ones heart b4 u learn how to cherish them?
Perhaps all of us need to lose someone we learn our lesson not to take them for granted. But then , perhaps , the person we end up with in the end , might not be the one we love most and lost. -
I am sad for your loss.
Do take care -
u sound like a really nice guy. I think it is her loss to give u up like tat.
hope u recover soon.
there are still a lot of nice girls out there who have been hurt b4, and still waiting for "The One". So it's not too late.
Have some faith. -
i guess it's hard for pple to learn unless they experience the pain themselves. Take care and let time heal ur wound. You are a nice guy so it's her loss..
-
yr situation quite same as mine..
now am feeling so sad and void... it like some part of me gone.
but i guess i had given her the last chance already.. but she still act this way...
it like she also unsure about this relationship...
so i made up my mind and finally it all over yesterday.
though am sad but i think it good for both of us.
now i will focus on my career and who knows...what will happed in the future.
-
She's your choice. Remember?Originally posted by wuss:
I really dunno how to describe the feelings i have now...Something would be close would be.
numb , dull , empty , void , dazed
For 1 1/2 years i have been with a gal i love , everything was perfect in the beginning , till late last year . She started her own travel agency and begin diggin herself into work. Sms and calls drizzle to a minimal , sometimes she would disappear for hours or sometimes 1-2 days , sms becomes almost non-existant or no picking up of calls or returns. "Be patient i tell myself , she's busy with work " and i know she is , and i always hope things would get better. But it din , our dates gets cancelled , postponed , she forgets special days. All she can say is "i m sorry , tied up with work" again n again.
Be patient i tell myself , over n over again.
And still things look gloomy , i tried to talk to her, abt us distancing , and the amount of time we do not have for each other . And she acknowledges that, but all she can do is cry and say sorry.
Be patient , one day i ll see the light at the tunnel . I know i will , i tell myself , when the coldest n loneliest night i bear alone.
till now ,
She skipped valentine's day , not a card , not a gift , say she's not feeling well . Its alrite i tell her , i took a week to choose a gift for her , a card and a rose . I dont mind , its okie hun , no worries. She say she get something for me for chinese valentine , to make it up .
We had planned a previous month b4 going to koh samui today coz tommorrow is my birthday , she suggested and arrange for a trip for me.
For one month i was happy and excited for this trip.I even took 3 days leave.
I had my hair cut , my teeth clean at the dentist , bought a lot of beach wear . Pack everything early.
Till the day b4 yesterday , she disappeared again , sms me telling me she's busy , will call me back . never did.
And yesterday , the day we suppose to fly off to koh samui. She msg me in the morning she's also busy. I forgotten how many times i called and left msges and sms her. and i well knew she might not be able to make it..
I left home alone hoping last min she would call me , and i sat at the departure hall alone . waiting for some miracle to happen. i check the plane tix booking , it never showed our names . Somehow the internet booking never went tru , i have ask her to double check with airlines twice , guess she never did.
So i sat there waitin ...alone...hoping its a mistake and she has a valid reason to be missing. While i m worried sick for 2 days ..
finally the sms came , 1 hour b4 departure. She's Stuck with work and cannot make it anymore , she's very upset n sorry.
I was dumb founded.....somehow in my heart i knew it was the last chance i would give to her. and she failed to make it.
I sms her , "its over"
She reply "wat you mean ? are you leaving me?"
I sms her " I didnt leave you , you leave me long ago , you just dont realise it , i m no longer no 1 in your life , your clients more important than me"
she replied " i m so sorry"
I sat there for the next few hours , looking our flight fly away.staring into the emptiness of the viewhall. Thinking wad did i wrong , why did my relationship fail. How can things turn out like this , when i devote my love n life to her and she treats me like dirt , not even the basic respect of a fren.
How can i be so low ? i msg her so many questions , and she never answered any ...she just says she's sorry.
so i began to walk ...took the train to town , look for a fren , then went off to buy beers and sat near the river. I called my closest frens , and started to cry.alcohol does make a man lose his emotional control. I spend the next few hours staring into the river n thinking wad went wrong. And i called her , many times again , she prob do not dare to pick up the phone. As if i m in the wrong , why m i still trying to call her?
So i took my luggage and walk the streets alone again , till my mind was so dazed and took a cab home n slept.
I woke up this morning hoping its all dream...but it isnt.. just a feeling of nothingness...She msg me while i was sleeping , telling she knows she hurt me deeply and will leave me for good this time.
I did not reply to that.
How can she treat someone she said she love so deeply n truely . Becoz she cant disappoint her clients , but she can break her promises n disappoint me .
Again and again n again , coz she knows i will forgive her.
How many times will u break your love ones heart b4 u learn how to cherish them?
Perhaps all of us need to lose someone we learn our lesson not to take them for granted. But then , perhaps , the person we end up with in the end , might not be the one we love most and lost. -
aye I tot you are uncle agony ...Originally posted by Devil1976:She's your choice. Remember? -
Sometimes words of comfort are not neccesary in few cases. What is needed here is words of affirmation and wisdom.Originally posted by mistyblue:aye I tot you are uncle agony ...
He knows he need to leave long ago, but he didn't. It's true....it's his choice. -
well, he didn't know he "need to leave long ago". He felt there was hope and chose to cling on to it.Originally posted by M©+square:Sometimes words of comfort are not neccesary in few cases. What is needed here is words of affirmation and wisdom.
He knows he need to leave long ago, but he didn't. It's true....it's his choice.
only that it didnt turn out the way he has hoped it to. so he had to give up.
love is blind sometimes. i guess he just wanted to believe there is hope. Nothing wrong with that. -
True... but I suppose it hurts no less having to come eventually to this conclusion.Originally posted by M©+square:Sometimes words of comfort are not neccesary in few cases. What is needed here is words of affirmation and wisdom.
He knows he need to leave long ago, but he didn't. It's true....it's his choice. -
I'm no uncle agony. I'm a Devil.Originally posted by mistyblue:aye I tot you are uncle agony ...
She's either busy or she've got some serious issues of her own which she's not sharing with him. Either way, it's a not a good sign.
Nobody's perfect in this world. In choosing a partner, you'll have to be able to accomodate to each other's life style to an extent.
She's in business. She can be busy now, she can be busy forever. Can he live with that? Can he cope with it? If he can't now, what makes you think he can in the future?
Regarding possibilities of some issues she's not sharing with him. Either she's just not sharing it or there is an issue regarding the foundation of their relationship. Either way, it's probably not something which can just be untangled like this... -
Nothing wrong with staying and hoping. That's what love can do.Originally posted by fairlady04:well, he didn't know he "need to leave long ago". He felt there was hope and chose to cling on to it.
only that it didnt turn out the way he has hoped it to. so he had to give up.
love is blind sometimes. i guess he just wanted to believe there is hope. Nothing wrong with that.
You misunderstood my statement. Everybody's decisions will conclude with after effects. If one chooses to stay and hang on, he'll either reap a fulfilling r/s or end up being played out.
If he chooses to leave. He might miss out the things he have been waiting for...or he might be better off being single and maybe she might go back to him in due time.
Well...the law of cause and effects still does stand.
Concluding this episode is indeed a mystery to him.
He couldn't understand how her position in work had taken over him.
Unable to cope with the subtle lost, is the hardest.
He lost her. Like what Devil pointed out...in terms of communication and commitment...she subtlely left him.
He didn't get to see that he was left behind.
I've been in that situation and i've learnt thru the hard way. -
Sad. Isn't it?
The one who chose her. The one who chose to let go. In a relationship, it's often not about who to blame but how to overcome things... Unless of course, you're totally uninterested in the relationship anymore...? -
Ah So! Devil San, well said! I tot you was rather curt previously... at least, he eventually chosen to move on. Some other sites I've been to, the women cling on for dear life to their abusive relationships. I gave up reading cause it made me feel this world is so hopeless.Originally posted by Devil1976:I'm no uncle agony. I'm a Devil.
She's either busy or she've got some serious issues of her own which she's not sharing with him. Either way, it's a not a good sign.
Nobody's perfect in this world. In choosing a partner, you'll have to be able to accomodate to each other's life style to an extent.
She's in business. She can be busy now, she can be busy forever. Can he live with that? Can he cope with it? If he can't now, what makes you think he can in the future?
Regarding possibilities of some issues she's not sharing with him. Either she's just not sharing it or there is an issue regarding the foundation of their relationship. Either way, it's probably not something which can just be untangled like this...
For this case, my first thoughts were that, she had not trreasured their relationship.
No matter how busy, sparing a 5 minute session every day or every few days would not kill her... No one can really help. But as you said its life choices. -
How many hearts will you break before you get over it?
A long time ago when I was immersing myself in the self destructive abyss of self pity and despair cos of a failed relationship, a friend of mine gave me a diary. In the diary, there were different sayings on each page and she selected a page to write a message to me.
I remember the words very well. Basically it says, How many hearts will you break before you get over your sadness? And in her message she reminded me about the many people who still love and care for me and its breaking their hearts to see me let myself go this way.
It is normal to feel sorrowful and betrayed and confused. It is a terrible thing to feel that all the love invested in a person unappreciated. Just don't stay too long in misery else it becomes a habit that is hard to cast off. -
may i have the strenght to recover.
-
Sad for your lost but as you said she set up her own company. I'm not surprised that she is sweating and working hard for it to break-even because I believe she must have invested her sweat and blood money into it.
I don't know the whole situation. Did you offer to help her with her biz? Starting a biz is not easy. You have to work as there is no day and night since you are on ground zero with a negative figure in your accounts book. I don't know she may seem strong but she might have been waiting for you to offer to help.
She might be so passionate about living her dreams that she neglected you. Anyway you don't need to be 1st place in her heart for her to love you. I mean great if you have 1st priority all the time but priorities do change. -
To: wuss
Well, it truly hurts... i had the similar experience, though to a lesser extend. All i can say is... u made the RIGHT choice.
In the case of a "always not there partner" there are usually 2 reasons: U love her more than she loves u, or that is the way her life is ( Some ppl are jus busier than others).
Either way, things are not going to improve much unless somethk significant happens... hmm... i guess if u can't accept the situation (like me), the best solution will be to leave.
If you love someone, let them go. If
they return to you, it was meant to be. If
they don't, their love was never yours to
begin with...
loving is not how you forget but how
you forgive, not how you listen but how
you understand, not what you see but
how you feel and not how you let go but
how you hold on.
If someone comes into your life and becomes a
part of you but for some reasons he couldn't stay,
don't cry too much... Just be glad that your paths
crossed and; somehow he made you happy even
for a while. Time will tell. If he's yours he will surely
come back.Don't throw your back to love when it's
already in front of you. Don't drive it away from you
because if you do, someday you'll think again why
you let love fly away when it was once residing
next to you. Treasure the one who loves you! It's
not easy to find a person who loves you. It's
always more valuable to have a sincere heart. The
greatest regrets in our lives are the risks we did
not take. If you think something will make you.
happy, GO FOR IT. Remember that we pass this
way only once. Time doesn't wait. If you think you
might have found the right one, treasure the
person, don't let that person get away. Don't let
fear hold You back. Give it a try else you might
regret later..."No one other than ourselves know
what can truly make us happy."
jus sharin some nice quotes i saw abt love.. -
meaningful...Originally posted by A Beautiful Mind:To: wuss
Well, it truly hurts... i had the similar experience, though to a lesser extend. All i can say is... u made the RIGHT choice.
In the case of a "always not there partner" there are usually 2 reasons: U love her more than she loves u, or that is the way her life is ( Some ppl are jus busier than others).
Either way, things are not going to improve much unless somethk significant happens... hmm... i guess if u can't accept the situation (like me), the best solution will be to leave.
If you love someone, let them go. If
they return to you, it was meant to be. If
they don't, their love was never yours to
begin with...
loving is not how you forget but how
you forgive, not how you listen but how
you understand, not what you see but
how you feel and not how you let go but
how you hold on.
If someone comes into your life and becomes a
part of you but for some reasons he couldn't stay,
don't cry too much... Just be glad that your paths
crossed and; somehow he made you happy even
for a while. Time will tell. If he's yours he will surely
come back.Don't throw your back to love when it's
already in front of you. Don't drive it away from you
because if you do, someday you'll think again why
you let love fly away when it was once residing
next to you. Treasure the one who loves you! It's
not easy to find a person who loves you. It's
always more valuable to have a sincere heart. The
greatest regrets in our lives are the risks we did
not take. If you think something will make you.
happy, GO FOR IT. Remember that we pass this
way only once. Time doesn't wait. If you think you
might have found the right one, treasure the
person, don't let that person get away. Don't let
fear hold You back. Give it a try else you might
regret later..."No one other than ourselves know
what can truly make us happy."
jus sharin some nice quotes i saw abt love.. -
Dis is 1 of d sadest tales i've heard......
I'm stil kinda hopin someone wil announce dis thread to b jus a gag......
For d poor fella's sake..... -
So sad for ur loss.
*gives wuss a big bear hug* -
hmm...i think you're still new?Originally posted by pipi & poot-poot:Dis is 1 of d sadest tales i've heard......
I'm stil kinda hopin someone wil announce dis thread to b jus a gag......
For d poor fella's sake.....
Try to start reading Aunt Agony threads from yr 2000.
This will not be the saddest anymore.
-
I can feel your pain but remember that the truth always hurts and we should just do what others did and learn to live with it.
-
yr 2000 ???Originally posted by M©+square:hmm...i think you're still new?
Try to start reading Aunt Agony threads from yr 2000.
This will not be the saddest anymore.
Surely....u jest..... -
Women are all a waste of time...
