Should I keep my first for my wedding night ?
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hi casino, how was it? did u manage to talk to ur fiance or rather husband?
as a girl, i must say, physical intimacy is every bit as important as the emotional aspects in a relationship. so u shld take that into consideration when u communicate with him. -
is he marrying you for sex??? if not why is he pushing?? am just wondering...
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Originally posted by starblue:
Perhaps he had just gotten his "driving license" and couldn't wait to "drive"?
is he marrying you for sex??? if not why is he pushing?? am just wondering... -
i waited for a few years before i can literally drive after getting my license..Originally posted by Tuatau:Perhaps he had just gotten his "driving license" and couldn't wait to "drive"?
anyway for my 2 cts in this topic..
Even after marriage.. respect is an important element.. so is communication, trust and honesty..
I believe the bone of contention here is wat defines when a person is married? After ROM? After Solemnisation or After customary? Casino's bf/husband probably wants the date defined as earlier and hence an earlier consummation of the marriage..
I guess its really a matter of personal beliefs to defend and communication with the husband/bf.. -
if marrying juz for sex...Originally posted by starblue:is he marrying you for sex??? if not why is he pushing?? am just wondering...
wat for they pat tor for so many years...
besides they're married already...
he prob feels tat they're married already after rom..
she feels they're married only after the customery wedding...
difference of opinion...
there's no right or wrong here...
of course the guy should respect the girl's decision...
but there's no wrong in him asking also wat... -
So marriage = license to sex?Originally posted by Casino:People said I am conservative. My boyfriend who I am going to marry this September said that too. We quarrel over it often. He said I am too conversative and that not good for our marriage life ? Is it true ? I am 26. This is my 2nd relationship. My first relationship end because of that too. I trust my future hubby but I want to keep it for him on wedding night. But he claimed that since we have registered and is marrying soon, I should allow him to go futher then now what we are doing. Please advise ... -
Wait lor...will die meh...5 months....
tell ur bf... if he loves you he will endure it period. Otherwise he will take it as he marry for sex nia... then what is the bloodly point... -
my advice is to keep it for the wedding night. This has been the value u cherished so keep it.. dun give in.. we may feel obliged to but we really dun haf to ..if u decided to give in to his request, on the wedding night itself, u may feel bitter.. cos the wish of keeping everything for the night itself cant be fulfiled anymore. worse if this affects u for quite some time.. there may be more disagreements in the future.. meanwhile u just try to do some stuff that will pls him or cheer him up a bit..pamper him wif other stuff like cooking a nice meal for him and stuff.. maybe
do more outdoor activities wif him so he wont haf much chance of asking it frm u? main thing is get involve with activities that will get his mind off sex.. i think dat might help a little.. but watever it is, never never flare up and quarrel, talk things out nicely even when he starts to throw his temper.. it's not going to be easy u need lots of patience..all the best!
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Chinese 10-course dinner is mere token formality. When your marriage has been documented in the legal sense, you are free to do what you want, even making babies.Originally posted by Casino:If we are not chinese customarriage, dont said 5 years, even 10 years, I will still keep it. But after reading all the posting, maybe it is true that we are now official married. -
If that's what you want, go for it. Obviously, you view this as a special gift which you wish to share with him on your special night. Good on you girl, stand up for what you believe in. Tell him to unwrap that gift on that night.