What should I do?
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'Mind game' is a assumption from her.
Assumptions could never be treated with seriously. -
Hmm.....I don't know if it's a mind game, Joyless. I don't know if he is also battling with himself. Just trying to be objective and not directing at gender but at situation, people has a tendency to want to have their cake and eat it too. I suspect, on one hand, he wants to let go and on the other he is also hanging on. Like saying things like remaining friends and such. Sort of you are still around or within arms length kind of thing. I also suspect that the reason he initiate the breakup so he doesn't have to hide his new relationship. Dear, dear, not sure if I am making any sense here. Maybe I am not expressing myself well. Anyways, just a thought. No further advices as our virtual friends here have all written very good messages herein. Hopefully, some will drive home the point.
Again, write and tell whenever you are down. But definitely move on. You can do it, lady!!!! -
My advice is try not to do selective readings here,
Do not think too much in your ex boyfriend's actions. Decide on your own what you want. - Do not assume.
Take time to forgive him and move on.
Cheers -
Personal guess. He still can't really face and get over things?Originally posted by Joyless:Thanks for all the advice that you've given me!
I don't know what mind games that he's playing with me!
On the day of break-up, he told me that he's dishearted and want us to be friends. Then during the week, he sms me, asking to hang on, that he feels hurt when I'm feeling miserable and that he still cares a lot about me. Thereafter, he sent me a mail, telling me to let time heal the wound and let fate decide. He told me to concentrate on my new job whereas he concentrate on his career. He also mentioned that he does not have the heart for relationship even though he has the alternative.
On the tenth day of break-up, he met up with me for a talk. He told me :
--> He's dishearted as I did not listen to his advice.
--> He feels that there's no future between us due to our differences in cultures and upbringings, thus he's firm in his decision of ending the relationship.
--> He feels that I'm not committing enough.
--> But he did not mention anything about the new girl.
--> He still care a lot about me and he feels very hurt when he know that I'm feeling miserable.
Then, he sent me a mail yesterday (monday), telling me that things will never work out between us as the spark in his heart has died. He, himself, also don't know why the spark has died. Thus, he rather give up our relationship and start on another relationship. He told me that he cares about me and hope that we can remain as friends.
But his friend called me earlier and told me that he met up with my ex on Sunday. And when his friend mentioned about me, he told his friend not to tell him anything that's regarding about me, as he's not interested to know at all.
I'm very puzzled. Why did he sent me a mail on monday saying that he cares about me and hopes that we remain as friends, whereas on the other hand, he told his friend that he's not interested to know about anything that's regarding me?
I really don't know what type of mind games that he's playing with me now! Why is he treating me in this way? Why is it that the things that he says are ever-changing? Whisch is the truth and which are the lies?
But no matter. Decision has been made and reality has been fixed. Even at this point, there'll probably be no easy nor fruitful way to turn things back as it was.
So where you wanna be? Living for yourself or living in the past? -
hmmm.....
me wonders who he still wanna care abt you if his spark REALLY is gone????
if he left u for any other reasons other than a new gal
then u`re goin to regret missing such a nice guy who perhaps ledt you because he thought it might be in a better situation for you?? -
If u wana know the truth, ask ur ex wat did they talk about lor.
But then since he's so determined to break, face it. If he is the type who dun even care for you after break up, then he's not worth ur love at all. -
Since he has made himself clear to you, why do you still want to hang on? Dun ever try to reason his actions after the breakup. You will only make yourself more miserable with the "whys"...
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Originally posted by Joyless:Thanks for all the advice that you've given me!
I don't know what mind games that he's playing with me!
On the day of break-up, he told me that he's dishearted and want us to be friends. Then during the week, he sms me, asking to hang on, that he feels hurt when I'm feeling miserable and that he still cares a lot about me. Thereafter, he sent me a mail, telling me to let time heal the wound and let fate decide. He told me to concentrate on my new job whereas he concentrate on his career. He also mentioned that he does not have the heart for relationship even though he has the alternative.
On the tenth day of break-up, he met up with me for a talk. He told me :
--> He's dishearted as I did not listen to his advice.
--> He feels that there's no future between us due to our differences in cultures and upbringings, thus he's firm in his decision of ending the relationship.
--> He feels that I'm not committing enough.
--> But he did not mention anything about the new girl.
--> He still care a lot about me and he feels very hurt when he know that I'm feeling miserable.
Then, he sent me a mail yesterday (monday), telling me that things will never work out between us as the spark in his heart has died. He, himself, also don't know why the spark has died. Thus, he rather give up our relationship and start on another relationship. He told me that he cares about me and hope that we can remain as friends.
But his friend called me earlier and told me that he met up with my ex on Sunday. And when his friend mentioned about me, he told his friend not to tell him anything that's regarding about me, as he's not interested to know at all.
I'm very puzzled. Why did he sent me a mail on monday saying that he cares about me and hopes that we remain as friends, whereas on the other hand, he told his friend that he's not interested to know about anything that's regarding me?
I really don't know what type of mind games that he's playing with me now! Why is he treating me in this way? Why is it that the things that he says are ever-changing? Whisch is the truth and which are the lies?
Further points to reinforce my early post.
Cheers -
Thanks for the valuable advice that you've given me.
After intellection, I have decided to get over with this relationship and let time heal the wounds. It's pointless for me to dwell on his actions as it will make me more miserable. -
Originally posted by Joyless:Thanks for the valuable advice that you've given me.
After intellection, I have decided to get over with this relationship and let time heal the wounds. It's pointless for me to dwell on his actions as it will make me more miserable.