Advice Needed
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....recently my GF of 2 yrs dump me...3weeks later she got herself another guy...i just cant get over this relationship....she was soo nice until the day she broke up tat i saw how scary it was for a girl to have a change of heart...she just took everything in her stride and go chiong....its just so hurtful....i saw her and her bf recently n it just hurts to she her holding another guy's arm....i have no one to turn to but drugs to solve my problems....appealing to all kind souls out there to help...i realli gave me life for tis relationship......
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hey.. no1 can help u.. nuting can make u feel better.. onli u urself can!!.. cry all u wan.. then move on with life.. the world wil never stop becoz of any1 or anyting...
it never easy to let go.. and im not going to ask u to let go.. im onli going to ask to acept the facts as it is.. its easier this way. not pt tryin to hide, tryin to bury it..
time wil heal.. trust mi... give urself sometime.. to tink abt it.. wat went wrong.. y this happen.. learn ur lesson.. change if u are wrong.. if she is at fault totally.. wel.. jsut treat it as a experience..
i have lots of bf b4.. been bump alot of time.. but i never give up. coz i treat every relationship as a lesson.. i learn fr it and make myself a better gf for my future bf.
i oso believe. there is always some1 for mi.. it apply the same to u.. dun do topid tings to urself.. it wil onli make the matter worse..
let this healin period of urs.. oso a upgradin period for urself to be a better man.. go know more frenz.. learn a skil or hobby... time wil pass faster this way..
gd luck to u~!....
[This message has been edited by MoNsTer (edited 29 May 2002).] -
sigh.. ur ex is mostly probably a bitch lor... since she so "fu xin" u shldnt really think abt her...
time heals but scars will be left monster~! haha :p
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Don't Flame Me. -
She's really bad to find herself another guy in such a short time. This means that she dun really love u that deeply! Move on, you will surely find someone a MILLION times better, she dun deserve u. Quit the drug hobby pal, it will only lessen your pain temporary, tink of the long term effects it may have on your health, its not worth it to indulge your sorrow in drugs becoz of that bitch. Kick the drug habit pal, clean up, go out, join a youth club or play a new sports to meet more friends and enlarge your social circles, u never koe which girl will be the next special someone u are going to meet in the future who truly deserves u
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To let a girl like this ruin your life is really not worth it. Don't even think about doing drugs or wasting your life away because she is not going to care and you will end up suffering worse than you already are and the problem will still be there.
My fren is even worse off than you. He had a gf for about 2 years and when he enlist into the army, the girl starts seeing other guys. During a Sat when he booked out, he and his friends saw his gf holding hands with another guy.
So don't despair, life has its ups and downs. If you fall, climb back up and learn your mistakes and don't make the same mistakes again the next time. -
It is always like this. Nothing has ever changed.
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Walking in the rain... -
.....somehow its just impossible to let it go....the past's just gripping onto me....its like when we r together, i dont have friends, we r together always...i kinda like just wanna make her happy...its realli hard to let go....itz like yesterday we were veli close together n today she broke up with me....like the sudden lost of both arms...itz just so hard to move on....i m always alone now and everywhere i go, watever i do, she just seems to be there in my mind....my god brothers r serving ns like me....where to find ppl to help???? sat they bk out so tired to go out or with gfs.....i noe itz never easy to move on...i have tried and i have failed....i realli just wan someone to fill in the void emptyness in my life now....god noes wat the future holds....as for the drug shit, i kinda just wan something to tranquilize my mind from thinking of her....she is kinda like my eternity....
i used to tell her love is today but tomolo will be committment cos i m just happy go lucky....somehow due to her influence i matured a lot and i started to plan for our future....wat the heck, she left me....its just all lies....no one can c the future but i m sure for 1 thing.....the past is always sweet and it always the sad things that makes the past even sweeter....i have already done my veli best as her bf n i still failed....all her friends kinda like me cos they say tat of all her ex bfs all also no good....but who cares...no matter how good its also useless....
now i m just uncertain of the future...i m just scared to noe wat lies there.....indulging in liquor and cigs just doesnt seems to help at all..... -
I feel tat this girl is not a girl u really shd be thinking about since she treats you like this.U really shd not experiment with drugs jus becoz of this 1 girl.Originally posted by DavyLMF:....recently my GF of 2 yrs dump me...3weeks later she got herself another guy...i just cant get over this relationship....she was soo nice until the day she broke up tat i saw how scary it was for a girl to have a change of heart...she just took everything in her stride and go chiong....its just so hurtful....i saw her and her bf recently n it just hurts to she her holding another guy's arm....i have no one to turn to but drugs to solve my problems....appealing to all kind souls out there to help...i realli gave me life for tis relationship...... -
Hey!u realli need to slap urself real hard sia!Everyone here is trying to help u get out of the pain dat u r suffering now!Originally posted by DavyLMF:.....somehow its just impossible to let it go....the past's just gripping onto me....its like when we r together, i dont have friends, we r together always...i kinda like just wanna make her happy...its realli hard to let go....itz like yesterday we were veli close together n today she broke up with me....like the sudden lost of both arms...itz just so hard to move on....i m always alone now and everywhere i go, watever i do, she just seems to be there in my mind....my god brothers r serving ns like me....where to find ppl to help???? sat they bk out so tired to go out or with gfs.....i noe itz never easy to move on...i have tried and i have failed....i realli just wan someone to fill in the void emptyness in my life now....god noes wat the future holds....as for the drug shit, i kinda just wan something to tranquilize my mind from thinking of her....she is kinda like my eternity....
i used to tell her love is today but tomolo will be committment cos i m just happy go lucky....somehow due to her influence i matured a lot and i started to plan for our future....wat the heck, she left me....its just all lies....no one can c the future but i m sure for 1 thing.....the past is always sweet and it always the sad things that makes the past even sweeter....i have already done my veli best as her bf n i still failed....all her friends kinda like me cos they say tat of all her ex bfs all also no good....but who cares...no matter how good its also useless....
now i m just uncertain of the future...i m just scared to noe wat lies there.....indulging in liquor and cigs just doesnt seems to help at all.....
And u noe wat dat means? it simply means dat we, WE CARE FOR U! If we dun care, we wont even bother to reply to u! Comon,be a real man! Hold ur head high and continue ur journey of life!
Life is never a smooth path for anyone. Believe me, nobody has led a life dat is without problems. Its juz how u look into it, and cope with it. I agree dat its very difficult to forget abt a relationship especially when u were having high hopes on it. But it cun be help, once its over, its over. No matter how hard u try, the affinity between the two of u is over.Y not look at it it dis way, be happy dat at least u still have the sweet memories to think of? At least the both of u were happy once. If u realli love her, u shld wish her well.
U noe, love is something dat is very hard to define. Coz we tok abt feelings here. But face the truth, the love dat she used to have for u is over, the love story between the two of u has ended. Close dis chapter of ur life, cont with the rest of ur chapters. As u move on, after some time when u look back, u'll probably smile to urself, yeah, u used to have dis ger in ur life. U noe wat i mean?Dun be a coward anymore!Face the truth and ur future with confidence!
If u ever need a person to tok to, im sure everyone in here will be glad to hlp u... i'm sorry if i had been a little bit too harsh at the beginning, but i realli mean well...hope the nxt time when i hear frm u, u'll be a changed person! 
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As LoNg As I SHaLL LiVe
I'LL HoLd U dEaR
AnD I wILL rEMiNiScE
Of OuR LoVe ALL ThRoUgH
ThE YeArS.... -
Don't mind a FRANK guy here... From YOUR POST, I SENSE that it's not that you CAN'T let it go... You've just REFUSED to... CHOSE NOT to.....Originally posted by DavyLMF:.....somehow its just impossible to let it go....the past's just gripping onto me....its like when we r together, i dont have friends, we r together always...i kinda like just wanna make her happy...its realli hard to let go....itz like yesterday we were veli close together n today she broke up with me....like the sudden lost of both arms...itz just so hard to move on....i m always alone now and everywhere i go, watever i do, she just seems to be there in my mind....my god brothers r serving ns like me....where to find ppl to help???? sat they bk out so tired to go out or with gfs.....i noe itz never easy to move on...i have tried and i have failed....i realli just wan someone to fill in the void emptyness in my life now....god noes wat the future holds....as for the drug shit, i kinda just wan something to tranquilize my mind from thinking of her....she is kinda like my eternity....
i used to tell her love is today but tomolo will be committment cos i m just happy go lucky....somehow due to her influence i matured a lot and i started to plan for our future....wat the heck, she left me....its just all lies....no one can c the future but i m sure for 1 thing.....the past is always sweet and it always the sad things that makes the past even sweeter....i have already done my veli best as her bf n i still failed....all her friends kinda like me cos they say tat of all her ex bfs all also no good....but who cares...no matter how good its also useless....
now i m just uncertain of the future...i m just scared to noe wat lies there.....indulging in liquor and cigs just doesnt seems to help at all.....
ANGER fills your mind... With contempt, you're CORRUPTED.... Having no one to stand by you and give you a helping hand at this point of your Life is NO EXCUSE to simply let things be... You STILL have YOURSELF... AT LEAST for now.... Quick make FULL USE of yourself... Before you LOST IT TOTALLY.... You'll NEVER KNOW that this point of your Life could prove to be a FATAL TURNING DOWNSLOPE... IF YOU allow it to happen...
Cigars, liquors and drugs... HOW MANY PEOPLE have tried it....? If it works there won't be so many suicidal cases arising from it... So many people LOST.... You're just temporarily PARALYSING your mind for now... Let it LAST, and you could be PARALYSING the REST of YOUR LIFE.... OVER a SINGLE WOMAN? Issit worth it at all...? I know this lady is SO IMPORTANT to you.... But you'll never know if there could be a MORE IMPORTANT and WORTHY lady waiting for you in the future of your life.... And you WOULD NEVER KNOW if your life just starts to ROT here... Throw yourself on the floor and let people spit at you...? Sympathise you....? PICK IT UP YOURSELF BOY.... It's YOUR LIFE... Like this is gonna be ANYBODY ELSE's BUSINESS...? If you DON'T pick it up, OTHERS would just STEP OVER IT.... EVERYBODY's BUSY... WHY would they bother to stop and pick up something SO UNWORTHY.... Lying on the floor....?
DO YOU FEEL WEAK? BECAUSE YOU'RE PARALYSING YOURSELF... HAVE YOU LOST CONTROL? BECAUSE YOU'RE DECEIVING YOURSELF... PICK YOURSELF UP... REFORM.... WORTHINESS IS WHAT YOU MADE OF YOUR OWN... NOT WHAT PEOPLE SEE OF YOU... YOUR WORTHINESS, IS HER LOSS.... HER UNWORTHINESS.... BEAR NOT.... -
[This message has been edited by Devil1976 (edited 30 May 2002).] -
thanks ppl...but somehow things just got worse...i still remember during the last march poly exams, her final year, she said her fone spoil and tat how much she like 8810....well i just started searching high and low for the damn fone...
just to make her happy so tat she can concentrate on her studies....so after her exams, on a wednesday, she met me n i just pass her the fone....she was realli happy....DEN friday she play me out and we kinda like quarreled and den broke up.....
its like she said she wanted go chiong with her friends cos she veli long never chiong liao and tat her exams have finished....so i said ok i will be out with my friends also and tat i will drive u home....i waited till like 4 am and i called her, msg her but she didnt reply...so i kinda like reached home 5 am and reported to camp 7 am the next day...
went home at 12pm and like waited 4 her till 4pm cos she promise me last week tat she would go out with me......i was damn tired...den i just got realli fustrated tat she play me out like tat and i called her home....she was sleeping and i just force her to wake up.....i ask her y she didnt answer my fone last nite and she replied to network...
i said but the fone rang how can b no network...and i ask her wat she wan...she paused a while and said not happy den break up lor.....damn i was hurt....den the shit continues...
shit just happens.....i squeem and saved up every cent 4 her fone dispite my financial limitations.....*sigh*
just last week i kena summon $70, lost some stuffs (replacement fee $50), hp bills $100
.....drugs shit,...boy life just seems to get worse....
thank u ppl 4 yr advice but i just cant move on......i realli dont noe how.....i have tried many ways but still cant get over her.....just when i giving my 101% for her she left me...my pillar of support and my will of survival is also gone...but suicide is never on my mind....somehow tis painful heartache is killing me....i dont noe how long i can take tis... -
like i say... "if u refuse to move on.. no 1 can force u.." we say so much... in the end.. its u urself who choose to listen and move on anot..
im not going to say much.. just hope u understand tat are pple more ke lian then u! life is aredi very short. dun waste ur life this way.. hope u find the light in ur life soon... -
Turning to drugs is not exactly what I call a very smart move. Be a guy and move on with your life. Why be smitten over a gal?? There are 1001 others out there.
If u tell yourself this, this gal won't be staying that long in your heart. Live life easy. Cos it ain't that hard. -
CARRY ON PLEASE...? BE PATHETIC?Originally posted by DavyLMF:thanks ppl...but somehow things just got worse...i still remember during the last march poly exams, her final year, she said her fone spoil and tat how much she like 8810....well i just started searching high and low for the damn fone...
just to make her happy so tat she can concentrate on her studies....so after her exams, on a wednesday, she met me n i just pass her the fone....she was realli happy....DEN friday she play me out and we kinda like quarreled and den broke up.....
its like she said she wanted go chiong with her friends cos she veli long never chiong liao and tat her exams have finished....so i said ok i will be out with my friends also and tat i will drive u home....i waited till like 4 am and i called her, msg her but she didnt reply...so i kinda like reached home 5 am and reported to camp 7 am the next day...
went home at 12pm and like waited 4 her till 4pm cos she promise me last week tat she would go out with me......i was damn tired...den i just got realli fustrated tat she play me out like tat and i called her home....she was sleeping and i just force her to wake up.....i ask her y she didnt answer my fone last nite and she replied to network...
i said but the fone rang how can b no network...and i ask her wat she wan...she paused a while and said not happy den break up lor.....damn i was hurt....den the shit continues...
shit just happens.....i squeem and saved up every cent 4 her fone dispite my financial limitations.....*sigh*
just last week i kena summon $70, lost some stuffs (replacement fee $50), hp bills $100
.....drugs shit,...boy life just seems to get worse....
thank u ppl 4 yr advice but i just cant move on......i realli dont noe how.....i have tried many ways but still cant get over her.....just when i giving my 101% for her she left me...my pillar of support and my will of survival is also gone...but suicide is never on my mind....somehow tis painful heartache is killing me....i dont noe how long i can take tis... -
advices cant realli help. the most impt thing is urself. u want to continue to live in the bad memories or get a grip of wat the future can offer you, it's up to you. byebye
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One world
One love One mind
One soul One life
One peace One goal -
Drugs, liquor and cigs wouldnt help you to forget her. It'll only harm you even further.
Since you had tried your best in being her bf and she doesnt treasure you...then its her loss. Why do you want to torture yourself over someone who treats you like this? Is it worth it? And the worst thing is that she probably dont care abt how you feel now. So carry on with your own life...start afresh...for your own sake. You wouldnt want to stay like this forever, do you?
Besides she isnt the only catus in the desert, isnt the only tree in the forest, isnt the only fish in the sea...be glad that you found out her true face before you got married.
Get on with life...the world doesnt stop moving just because she left you...it still goes on...and on.
Hope you'll get over it asap... -
u noe wat? I somehow look down on u sia... We had tried our best to give advices, asking u to move on,to forget abt the unhappiness, get on with ur life...but nothing seems to wrk!
Since u had alreadi seen thorugh the ger,and noe dat wat kind of person she is, then y still cling on to her?Or rather to the memories filled with her?COMON!!
Now onli u can hlp urself to stand on both feet again..Forget abt the gifts dat u had given her, money spent can alwaz be earn back.I noe its nt ez for u to forget abt her,juz put all meories aside first and do wat muz be done,and FAST! Drugs!Stop all dat shit!Drinkin wont hlp believe me,have some healthy activites..go out with frens!Occupy urself!Learn something!Do anything so as u have no time to think abt her!Got it?
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As LoNg As I SHaLL LiVe
I'LL HoLd U dEaR
AnD I wILL rEMiNiScE
Of OuR LoVe ALL ThRoUgH
ThE YeArS.... -
I'm was once in the same plight as u r. Worse than u ar 3 years stead. i was 15 since i was with her. We were really happy together, when she left me she only took 3..... yeah 3 DAYS to have another stead.I was devasateted.........it's just like the end of the world. everywhere i go, everything i do She's always on my mind. Life just seems meaningless to me as days pass.1 year have passed,Till now i still miss her VERY much much but what's the use? she wouldn't know that u are missing her.i know that she's very happy with her stead now. All i can do is just pray for her happiness. But look at it another way, ur family and friends will still be there for u.I can say that i will NEVER forget about her and the happy times we had together but all these are the past, only sweet memories are left. If u want u've got to give ur best shot to win her heart back if she really dun give u chance, then u got to move on. Try to give urself this challenge - To live better than her. cos she wouldn't know that u are suffering for her.Time will heal, trust me, U are the one to determind how long this suffering will end cos no one else could. Think about........Hope u can get to ur feet fast cos i knoe the feeling and it's pure self-toture. Take care bro......
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i guess i m just in love with my own sadness...yes moving on, everybody can say but when its just hard trying to realli do it....i m sorri to be such a disappointment to u ppl but i just kinda lost hopes in everything....i just dont noe where to start or wat to do...
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It's not about being hard to do or difficult to accept... The POINT is, you HAVE TO.... It's just a matter of TIME... If you CAN'T, you can go ahead and FACE EXTINCTION....Originally posted by DavyLMF:i guess i m just in love with my own sadness...yes moving on, everybody can say but when its just hard trying to realli do it....i m sorri to be such a disappointment to u ppl but i just kinda lost hopes in everything....i just dont noe where to start or wat to do...
You DON'T have to START, you just have to CONTINUE with your Life.... Topical MISTAKE... If you're looking for a NEW START in your life, it might not neccessarily always happen.... Don't have to LOOK, don't have to WAIT.... TIME won't stop for you...
Hope this is the LAST TIME I'm reminding you...? I CAN SEE you have the POWER to make the DECISION... You're NOT WEAK... You just DON'T WANNA LET IT GO.... I just wanna say... IT'S YOUR CHOICE.... -
...i guess i noe wats the problem with me....maybe i m realli lonely and tat i got no one to turn to...tats y i m depressed....may be if i can meet new ppl hang out with them perhaps i might just feel better.....thanks ppl...
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Hey Davy, I understand how hard it really feels. It shows that you really love her but she doesn't appreciate you.
Since she has already made up her mind to break up with you, please try and forget her. If she really treasure you and if she really loves you, how could she love someone else so easily ?
Do not continue to go for things like drugs and stuffs. It might be hard but sooner or later you'll forget her. Just try your best and I'm sure you can do it.
Try to look for friends and anyone you feel its alright to talk with. My ex-gf actually loved another guy but my situation was not as bad as you.
Last but not least, I hope things will be fine and please, don't ever spoil yourself because of a girl. It's NOT WORTH IT.
Keep us updated. -
I understand how u feel. I'm in a similar situation as u. Everywhere I go or whatever I do, she juz keep appearing in my mind. She seems to be in my mind every moment in my life and I keep wanting to do things for her.
The worst thing is that even my friends get sick me, coz everytime I go out with them, I will keep telling them about how I still feel for that girl. My conversation keep revolving around her. My friends keep telling me not to mention abt her anymore, coz that will only make me harder to forget her. But the more I keep things to myself, the worst it gets and the feeling juz gets worse and worse, coz the feeling juz keep building inside me.
After a while, I feel that I really shldn't bother my friends anymore. I tried not to talk abt her whenever I'm with my friends, but deep down in my heart I'm actually still thinking abt it.
I almost lost interest in anything. The model answer to this type of situation is to get a life and widen yr social circle so that u will get to meet more people. But even if I force myself to socialize, I may be there physically, but my heart is not there.
Everyone knows what the stardard and model answer to this type of situation is. But it is really hard to do it. Now, I dun even have anyone whom I can talk to abt this problem, coz I dun want to bother other pple abt this anymore. I will feel bad taking up other pple's time on matters like this.
I'm still trying hard to get over it. And sometimes I do collapse and dun feel like living anymore. But after struggling for sometime, I feel that it will be too unfair to my family. Coz that will make them feel sadder than me. While I end my life and have no more worries, they in turn have to suffer for losing me as their love one.
Try to switch yr focus to think more abt those who love u. Your family and yr friends. Do u think they will bear to see u getting from bad to worse? Do you know that for those around you who cares for you, they will feel sad to see u in this state as well?
One way to start off is to ask pple around u if they have anything you could help them do. Try to take the initiative to offer help to yr friends. If you are good at playing the guitar, u can offer to teach other friends who dun know. If you are good at computers, you can offer yr help to repairs computers for other people. Whatever skills you have, make it to full use. Keep your time occupied with caring and offering help to those around you that may need it. In turn, yr friends will also appreciate it.
Be a better person from now on. There are others who need you as well. Look around you. There are bound to be pple in worst situation than you.
I'm also trying hard to get on with my life. Remember that u are not alone. All the best. -
firstly i wanna say thank u ppl for being so nice and for yr advices.....i have given tis thing a serious thought and i have reached a decision....thank u ppl....
i have chosen my path and i will walk tis path with no regrets...memories are just images of the past tat will not come back anymore....
i will live for the better....if not for anyone else for myself...though i still cant let go of the past...i will try...true time will heal any wounds...i believe
lastly i will like to express my gratitude to all ppl who have help me tide through tis tough period of my life....if there's anyone who would sincerely wish to be my friend pls e-mail me at [email protected]...
thank u ppl