is it a norm???
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Even Viets wouldn't stoop so low to go for primates. I just wonder whether he's categorised as "monkey", "ape" or "gorilla".
FeowFeowOriginally posted by cutegenie:If those viatnamese lady have a choice, I don't think they want to get marriage to "one" like "you" -
Originally posted by cutegenie:I don't wish to jump into conclusion as well... but I feel really disappointed when he watch porn everyday. I try to talk him out several times about how unhappy and hope that he will watch lesser like what he promises me when I first know about his activities at home.
But when I access to his PC again, the window that poping out and also the real player's history have shown all the evidence that he did not watch lesser but he try to hide all this from me. Not that I want to dig and protrude onto his privacy. He have the real player and the pop out window to blame.
upon talkings, arguments and quarellings he still did it. And if he really appreciate me, why then he keep making me repeatedly for the sake of porn???
He told me that he is a human, he need those porn. And said that all guys are the same, where to find a guy who don't watch it... He stick to his own perception and will carry on with the porn. That's why I said, he can forsake everything for those porn... and that he appreciate it more than anything else...
The difference is probably 'watch' and 'indulgence.' Almost all guys will probably come across some form of porn some way or another, but having to indulgence them is another thing.
Having a good sex life doesn't mean it would reduce one's usage of porn indulgence like drinking Pepsi doesn't mean it will reduce your craving for Coke.
Addiction.
This is more like a psychological issue than a choice thing. And because it's psychological, unless he realise that it is doing him some form of harm (damage to current relationship), his behavior will continue. Because he sees it as a norm, probably everyone is doing it, so why can't he? This belongs to the same category as one who tries to change their partner to quit smoking. Every Joe and Jane on the street is puffing away - so why can't he? He will continue until he realize that the 'cost' of indulgence is far too costly and becomes unhealthy.
Cheers -
Yeah, that's why I think it is ok as a fad, but if prolonged, he should seek medical advice. I've been through the stage, when I was about 20, but got sick of it pretty quickly. The plots the same,... no story line,... wth, after a while you move on to spend your time on other things :-)Originally posted by FeowFeow:Hi Golani,
No offence hor : ) But de-stressing is Not an excuse to watch porn 2 hrs per day
Why Not watch the real thing, i.e. his GF?
Conversely, if your gf were to visit sex places, & watch men strip-tease for 2 hrs a day instead of watching you/spending time with you, would you be as understanding of her need to de-stress? : ) If you can tahan, then good on you for Not practising double standards, but it'll still be hard for most girls to accept.
FeowFeow -
He is looking for a maid to do his house work, somebody to @#@$ when he is horny, not a partner, not a soulmate.Originally posted by cutegenie:If those viatnamese lady have a choice, I don't think they want to get marriage to "one" like "you" -
There are some minimum standards we expect from our parter, Mr Mahai...Originally posted by mahai102:dont bother commenting to this bunch of idiots...i think notforme made some valid points...to me all this whinging seems like singapore girls are turning into whinging minnies and stupiid arseholes...well, they deserve it...maybe they should choose smelly banglas for their bfs...i'm quite sure these banglas won't have enough money to download porn from the internet...
asking a guy not to watch porn is like telling these stupid singapore b.itches not to go shopping during the great singapore sale...stupid & assinine...ask them to frig themselve with a dildo lah...
this just proves that singapore men better go for docile vietnamese brides...hooray!!
If there isn't any, why do people need to choose, pick and find their partner anyway...? Might as well just randomly pick anyone off the streets...?
Males and females likewise... What she's asking for is just that he's not totally obsessed with it... Not meaning to totally control his acts and thoughts.. Which I personally think isn't all that uncalled for on her behalf...
I'm ok with girls doing shopping.. But how would you like it with a gf or only knows how to spend your money shopping and has totally no time to spend with you...?
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Well.. Like I've said, you chose your own bf...? There must be some other things which you've like about him which makes you choose him..? What about those factors...?Originally posted by cutegenie:I don't wish to jump into conclusion as well... but I feel really disappointed when he watch porn everyday. I try to talk him out several times about how unhappy and hope that he will watch lesser like what he promises me when I first know about his activities at home.
But when I access to his PC again, the window that poping out and also the real player's history have shown all the evidence that he did not watch lesser but he try to hide all this from me. Not that I want to dig and protrude onto his privacy. He have the real player and the pop out window to blame.
upon talkings, arguments and quarellings he still did it. And if he really appreciate me, why then he keep making me repeatedly for the sake of porn???
He told me that he is a human, he need those porn. And said that all guys are the same, where to find a guy who don't watch it... He stick to his own perception and will carry on with the porn. That's why I said, he can forsake everything for those porn... and that he appreciate it more than anything else...
Ultimately if you still want him, more appropriate to do a partial negotiation than to rid him totally of his 'activity'... In putting down TOO FIRM A STAND from your point, he probably would feel that you're equally insensitive to him (just like you feel he's insensitive to you right now)... And it's quite very unlikely for someone like him to just 'kick the habit' overnight... The more you expect of that, the more he'll need to hide things.. Which ultimately would only make the relationship even more unhealthy than it currently is...
Is he really that obsessed as to have totally neglected you...? -
hard to believe a guy will wanna watch porn if he has a gf
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You'll be surprised, some do Very bad, right?
FeowFeowOriginally posted by newmanmback:hard to believe a guy will wanna watch porn if he has a gf -
Originally posted by Yunhaier:
Wow.. as usual the mod of Yunhaier gives a powerful analysis The difference is probably 'watch' and 'indulgence.' Almost all guys will probably come across some form of porn some way or another, but having to indulgence them is another thing.
Having a good sex life doesn't mean it would reduce one's usage of porn indulgence like drinking Pepsi doesn't mean it will reduce your craving for Coke.
Addiction.
This is more like a psychological issue than a choice thing. And because it's psychological, unless he realise that it is doing him some form of harm (damage to current relationship), his behavior will continue. Because he sees it as a norm, probably everyone is doing it, so why can't he? This belongs to the same category as one who tries to change their partner to quit smoking. Every Joe and Jane on the street is puffing away - so why can't he? He will continue [b]until he realize that the 'cost' of indulgence is far too costly and becomes unhealthy.
Cheers [/b]
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Originally posted by FeowFeow:You'll be surprised, some do Very bad, right?
FeowFeow
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Uh oh...
Looks like I touched a raw nerve
Or I hit the nail on the head
FeowFeowOriginally posted by Devil1976: -
thanks guys... we have decided to end the relationship.
Its all over now. -
post again to reconfirm your status in one month's time ok?Originally posted by cutegenie:thanks guys... we have decided to end the relationship.
Its all over now. -
*hugz*
You'll feel better later, don't worry.
FeowFeowOriginally posted by cutegenie:thanks guys... we have decided to end the relationship.
Its all over now. -
Originally posted by M©+square:post again to reconfirm your status in one month's time ok?
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Think that we r already well aware of how u r feeling and i know its not a nice feeling.
For him this may be a problem affecting him more than it is for you. seemingly having been addicted for a long time, i would depict it similarly to a person being addicted to drugs. Its an urge he would be feeling ever time he is alone and bored.
As long as he is not showing any violent tendencies towards u, i really encourage you to standly firmly beside him. Do not reprimand him but instead let him feel that u accept him for having this problem. Let him know that you will be there for him to fight this addiction.
This may cause much tension within the relationship so its imperative u be very patient with him. he knows he is wrong but does not want to leave the comfort zone having so much of these at his disposal to feed his addiction. If possible encourage him to spend more time with u or at the very least with his friends.
If he is kept busy all the time, he would be killing two birds with one stone. Fighting his addiction and at the same time making full use of his life. A lot depends on u as the love of his life, for u may hold the key to making him a better person. That is if he is willing to fight his addiction.