Big surprise for ex
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A little update on my current situation involving my ex now....
It now seems that her good friend is acting as a middle person between us. I did not trust her initially because she kept on giving me attitude whenever we were conversing with each other. As time flew by , I found out that she was okay and it was natural of her to give that kinda "bimbo-ish" attitude.
I have this male friend who strongly dislikes her because he feels that she might be toying with my feelings by giving me false hopes. Anyways , she is the only remaining communcation line available that stands between me and my ex.
Basically my ex birthday is in 2 weeks time and she wants me to buy a present for her. The thing is , she told me that my ex wants accessories , makeup , perfume , pencil box and a bag for her birthday. Obviously my initial reaction to her was ,"eh you think I print money ah?" and so i dismissed it as something from her own personal opinion and besides my ex was never the kind of girl who would be interested in fashion accesories , let alone even go shopping.
Today she somehow managed to convince me that my ex really wanted these things for her birthday. My ex already knows that she is passing information to me about her but chooses to keep quiet about it. I know I can't buy all those stuff for her.
So here comes my first question......
1) Out of the fashion accessories , cosmetic set , perfume , pencil box and bag , pick the 2 most appropriate items which would be most meaningful
The next thing is she wants me to pass the present to her in a meaningful way. She suggested converting this lounge which we have been frequenting into the main setting ground , dim the lights , close all curtains and give that "romantic setting" even though if it happens in the afternoon. But come to think of it , I can assure myself that the minute I see her face when she enters the lounge , I would most probably freak out. I mean , it's been 3 months since I last saw her and I know a lot of things can happen in 3 months and so I'm not sure what the possible outcome of it might be.
I was thinking of doing mimicking the show "50 first dates" method. If you've watched the show , I'll do up an informal powerpoint presentation on my notebook and leave it beside her present in the lounge. So it will be like , "It's been 3 months since we last met , here's what you've been missing since the day I last saw you....CLICK HERE TO VIEW" then at the end of it , I'll say , "I'll be waiting for you at this particular place as at XXXXhrs." I'll feel more comfortable doing this instead of meeting her face to face in an instant , at least I'm more prepared this way....
So my second question would be spilt into 2 components....
2a) Do you think it is a good idea to do this considering the fact that I've never done something for her on a large scale before and I guess this kinda stuffs are reserved for matured adults eh? How would a girl view this scenario as? Hot or flop?
2b) Any further suggestions?
I'm thinking of setting aside $100 for her birthday "expenses" which includes her present as well....
Oh yeah , she also wants me to record myself singing the happy birthday song to her. I'm thinking of doing a piano accompaniment to it. So that means I'll be playing and singing at the same time. I do hope my Creative Muvo mp3 player is able to "balance out" the sounds....
Or what about the guitar? I can play the guitar as well but not as fluent enough..... -
geez... pal.. i'm planning to give a surprise to my ex too for her bday.
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how can break liao still can expect so many things from you?
Can you really trust that girl? -
Originally posted by rammstein619:
Well, my initial reaction to your update was "Run, Forrest! Run!"
Obviously my initial reaction to her was ,"eh you think I print money ah?"
...
2a) Do you think it is a good idea to do this considering the fact that I've never done something for her on a large scale before and I guess this kinda stuffs are reserved for matured adults eh? How would a girl view this scenario as? Hot or flop?
2b) Any further suggestions?
Apologies for not answering your first question. I don't know your girlfriend personally, and it seems rather pointless trying to guess what she would like and would find meaningful. However, if what your mutual friend said was true, your ex-girlfriend does sound rather "high maintenance", so you might want to work from there.
2a) May not be the right person to answer this question either. While the question of what she would do upon receiving your presents is important, the more important question is what you would do if things didn't go your way. Are you mentally prepared to accept a flop after all that you've done? Or would you like to adjust your expectations and scale your plan according to those expectations?
2b) "Run, Forrest! Run!"?
Whatever your decision is, and however your plan turns out, good luck.
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Your heart and the love you'll shower her with could be the biggest gift.
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PENCIL BOX ???? how old ar de both of u ?
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Originally posted by gUms:
You may wish to refer to the following thread for more information:
PENCIL BOX ???? how old ar de both of u ?
http://www.sgforums.com/?action=thread_display&thread_id=144569 -
-_-" i don't like the girl... besides, i don't understand the point of spending 100 bucks on an ex... why do guys like to do something special for their ex's bdays?? isn't the r/s over??
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I'm echoing what starblue thinks here too. Why spend so much money on someone who is no longer in a relationship with you? Your ex sounds like she's milking you for all that's left.
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What i find you will be doing is really sweet and romantic...however is she really over with you or you guys are still at the stage of not sure where you guys are...
Who initiated the break-up and why...will it happen again ? Is she playing with you? Since $100/- is alot of $$ to you then use it wisely...
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Dear Rammstein619,
1. Once I break up with an ex, it's over. Until sufficient time has passed for both of us to move on, I won't accept any gifts for fear that it gives him false hope. Later on, if we remain friends, I'll accept non-personal things from a friend. I hope you understand what I'm driving at.
2. If that ex wants to get me a gift, then it should be what he wants to give me as a friend, there's No reason for me to specify to him what I want. An ex, is still a human being, Not an ATM machine.
3. If I wanna catch up with an ex who's decided to remain friends with me, there's No need for romantic settings. We can just go for coffee, or dinner. Unless I've specifically told my ex there's a chance for us to patch things up, then No point leading him on, telling him to do this & do that for me. Love & relationships are NOT a game.
Moral of the story? Please think carefully, dear boy. I'm a woman, & here I am, Not even defending someone of the same gender. Girls/women usually know what other girls/women think. Been there, seen that, may/may Not have done that, but definitely experienced that in some way or other. There're plenty of fishies in the sea, cliche, but true. Why set your heart on a girl who doesn't deserve you?
FeowFeowOriginally posted by rammstein619:
A little update on my current situation involving my ex now....
It now seems that her good friend is acting as a middle person between us. I did not trust her initially because she kept on giving me attitude whenever we were conversing with each other. As time flew by , I found out that she was okay and it was natural of her to give that kinda "bimbo-ish" attitude.
I have this male friend who strongly dislikes her because he feels that she might be toying with my feelings by giving me false hopes. Anyways , she is the only remaining communcation line available that stands between me and my ex.
Basically my ex birthday is in 2 weeks time and she wants me to buy a present for her. The thing is , she told me that my ex wants accessories , makeup , perfume , pencil box and a bag for her birthday. Obviously my initial reaction to her was ,"eh you think I print money ah?" and so i dismissed it as something from her own personal opinion and besides my ex was never the kind of girl who would be interested in fashion accesories , let alone even go shopping.
Today she somehow managed to convince me that my ex really wanted these things for her birthday. My ex already knows that she is passing information to me about her but chooses to keep quiet about it. I know I can't buy all those stuff for her.
So here comes my first question......
1) Out of the [b]fashion accessories , cosmetic set , perfume , pencil box and bag , pick the 2 most appropriate items which would be most meaningful
The next thing is she wants me to pass the present to her in a meaningful way. She suggested converting this lounge which we have been frequenting into the main setting ground , dim the lights , close all curtains and give that "romantic setting" even though if it happens in the afternoon. But come to think of it , I can assure myself that the minute I see her face when she enters the lounge , I would most probably freak out. I mean , it's been 3 months since I last saw her and I know a lot of things can happen in 3 months and so I'm not sure what the possible outcome of it might be.
I was thinking of doing mimicking the show "50 first dates" method. If you've watched the show , I'll do up an informal powerpoint presentation on my notebook and leave it beside her present in the lounge. So it will be like , "It's been 3 months since we last met , here's what you've been missing since the day I last saw you....CLICK HERE TO VIEW" then at the end of it , I'll say , "I'll be waiting for you at this particular place as at XXXXhrs." I'll feel more comfortable doing this instead of meeting her face to face in an instant , at least I'm more prepared this way....
So my second question would be spilt into 2 components....
2a) Do you think it is a good idea to do this considering the fact that I've never done something for her on a large scale before and I guess this kinda stuffs are reserved for matured adults eh? How would a girl view this scenario as? Hot or flop?
2b) Any further suggestions?
I'm thinking of setting aside $100 for her birthday "expenses" which includes her present as well....
Oh yeah , she also wants me to record myself singing the happy birthday song to her. I'm thinking of doing a piano accompaniment to it. So that means I'll be playing and singing at the same time. I do hope my Creative Muvo mp3 player is able to "balance out" the sounds....
Or what about the guitar? I can play the guitar as well but not as fluent enough.....[/b] -
This is gonna be a last ditch effort to win her heart back...
I'm aware of the possible risk involved and I should thank my lucky stars for having such wonderful friends. One of my friends told me that he will be there (at the place itself) should anything not go according to plan , at least I have friends to fall back on.
After much replies here , I'll find out whether she has any intention to patch things up if not , then I guess I'll have to reconfig everything up once again...
Feow had a point here. No point doing up some "romantic" setting unless she has the intention of patching things up....
With that , I intend to find out.... -
seriously dude, you may be blinded by love. but listen to wad the folks in here are saying.. which girl will tell (through a friend or not) what she expects as gifts for her bday from an ex???
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if you can't open your eyes, then please open your ears...
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That's one thing which really puzzles me most. My ex was never like that. Whenever I wanted to give her a treat once in a while , she would tell me not to waste my money. In fact , she always insist that we go dutch all the time which is like of the direct conturary.Originally posted by starblue:-_-" i don't like the girl... besides, i don't understand the point of spending 100 bucks on an ex... why do guys like to do something special for their ex's bdays?? isn't the r/s over??
I thought maybe a person can change a lot in 3 months and there's also a possibility that she's sucking money out of me by giving me false hopes..... -
wellsaid FF,, but what if an ex wans u again for physical reasons?..I mean from woman to man...Originally posted by FeowFeow:Dear Rammstein619,
1. Once I break up with an ex, it's over. Until sufficient time has passed for both of us to move on, I won't accept any gifts for fear that it gives him false hope. Later on, if we remain friends, I'll accept non-personal things from a friend. I hope you understand what I'm driving at.
2. If that ex wants to get me a gift, then it should be what he wants to give me as a friend, there's No reason for me to specify to him what I want. An ex, is still a human being, Not an ATM machine.
3. If I wanna catch up with an ex who's decided to remain friends with me, there's No need for romantic settings. We can just go for coffee, or dinner. Unless I've specifically told my ex there's a chance for us to patch things up, then No point leading him on, telling him to do this & do that for me. Love & relationships are NOT a game.
Moral of the story? Please think carefully, dear boy. I'm a woman, & here I am, Not even defending someone of the same gender. Girls/women usually know what other girls/women think. Been there, seen that, may/may Not have done that, but definitely experienced that in some way or other. There're plenty of fishies in the sea, cliche, but true. Why set your heart on a girl who doesn't deserve you?
FeowFeow
*1st they used us, then they screwed us ,finally they wan us to be "friends?". -
wellsaid FF,, but what if an ex wans u again for physical reasons?..I mean from woman to man...Originally posted by FeowFeow:Dear Rammstein619,
1. Once I break up with an ex, it's over. Until sufficient time has passed for both of us to move on, I won't accept any gifts for fear that it gives him false hope. Later on, if we remain friends, I'll accept non-personal things from a friend. I hope you understand what I'm driving at.
2. If that ex wants to get me a gift, then it should be what he wants to give me as a friend, there's No reason for me to specify to him what I want. An ex, is still a human being, Not an ATM machine.
3. If I wanna catch up with an ex who's decided to remain friends with me, there's No need for romantic settings. We can just go for coffee, or dinner. Unless I've specifically told my ex there's a chance for us to patch things up, then No point leading him on, telling him to do this & do that for me. Love & relationships are NOT a game.
Moral of the story? Please think carefully, dear boy. I'm a woman, & here I am, Not even defending someone of the same gender. Girls/women usually know what other girls/women think. Been there, seen that, may/may Not have done that, but definitely experienced that in some way or other. There're plenty of fishies in the sea, cliche, but true. Why set your heart on a girl who doesn't deserve you?
FeowFeow
*1st they used us, then they screwed us ,finally they wan us to be "friends?". -
rammstein619,
I hope you'll re-consider doing that.
It is not to your advantage.
Cheers -
Sounds like santa is coming to town. Make a list of your christmas wishes.
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I have a feeling that she and her friend are trying to get back at me by playing around with my feelings and milking my cash away....
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Trust your feelings?Originally posted by rammstein619:I have a feeling that she and her friend are trying to get back at me by playing around with my feelings and milking my cash away....
Either way, you may want to speak to your ex personally.
This common friend is just a massenger, however she did instigate you to get something which doesn't make sense to me.
I don't want to sound like cold blanket.
my Advice is to be cautious.
Cheers -
Hi Megatron,
I'll be able to tell whether an ex wants me back for physical reasons or Not, & the answer, will be No.
In fact, my habit is Not to patch up with someone whom I've split with. My belief is that if he'd wanted to change, he would've changed DURING the relationship, Not AFTER. Thus, I'm pretty safe from this
If he wants physical activity, he should play basketball.
FeowFeowOriginally posted by megatron:wellsaid FF,, but what if an ex wans u again for physical reasons?..I mean from woman to man...
*1st they used us, then they screwed us ,finally they wan us to be "friends?". -
Well I can't just sit there and pretend to forget her birthday right?
or should I? -
then if u know that, do something for urself....Originally posted by rammstein619:I have a feeling that she and her friend are trying to get back at me by playing around with my feelings and milking my cash away....
rather then let them play a fool on u -
But on one hand , I really want to make her birthday a meaningful one but on the other hand , I got a feeling she's trying to get back at me by playing around with my feelings....