Infidelity in the family.
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its his choice .... there's nothing you can do ..Originally posted by ^spidee^:Thank you so much. From your advice and my family's problems in relationships, I believe I wouldn't stray..
That said, I really don't want to see my uncle's family break down. I don't understand why he would repeat this mistake, but we can't interfere too much cos my mum said it's his family affairs and it's inappropriate to probe too much into it. However, my poor aunt has 3 sons and it would be really tragic if they divorce.
You can give your support to your aunt and her kids but beyond that.. do not get involved as it is not your place or position. Besides, you would get yourself frustrated because you will only hear the excuses and rubbish from your uncle excusing his behaviour. You will feel frustrated when you feel the pain your aunt and cousins experience...
You need to be objective and help the people who need help. The people who cannot be help, just let them dig their grave. Your uncle will regret in future.. and might never realise their mistakes and continue to blame his wife and family for his life.. -
That is very good advice, thank you very much, mistyblue! I'll try spending more time with my cousins to perhaps ease my aunt's burden. As for my uncle, much as I respect him, I doubt I can see him the way I did in the past... They used to be so loving, sigh...Originally posted by mistyblue:its his choice .... there's nothing you can do ..
You can give your support to your aunt and her kids but beyond that.. do not get involved as it is not your place or position. Besides, you would get yourself frustrated because you will only hear the excuses and rubbish from your uncle excusing his behaviour. You will feel frustrated when you feel the pain your aunt and cousins experience...
You need to be objective and help the people who need help. The people who cannot be help, just let them dig their grave. Your uncle will regret in future.. and might never realise their mistakes and continue to blame his wife and family for his life.. -
People change.Originally posted by ^spidee^:That is very good advice, thank you very much, mistyblue! I'll try spending more time with my cousins to perhaps ease my aunt's burden. As for my uncle, much as I respect him, I doubt I can see him the way I did in the past... They used to be so loving, sigh...
Most important for you is to learn a lesson from this issue and don't repeat it yourself. -
That is true. My eldest cousin is in secondary 3 this year and he is a very sensible boy. Hope he'll set an example for his younger brothers. For now, I hope my uncle will come to his senses.Originally posted by mistyblue:People change.
Whatever happens to their family ... its their decision. You gotta respect it. In fact, it might be better, it might be worse. Whatever it is...
Most important for you is to learn a lesson from this issue and don't repeat it yourself. And also help your cosins know people still support them and their father's misdeeds is his own choice, not their fault and they should also learn not to step into the same path. The cycle needs to be broken. -
glad to hear that. Good luckOriginally posted by ^spidee^:That is true. My eldest cousin is in secondary 3 this year and he is a very sensible boy. Hope he'll set an example for his younger brothers. For now, I hope my uncle will come to his senses. -
Thanks once again, you've been most helpful.Originally posted by mistyblue:glad to hear that. Good luck
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They're not that harsh, just straightforward and very effective in tackling the problem. I wouldn't be surprised if you tell me you are a professional counsellor.Originally posted by mistyblue:thanks for your praises..
I know most of my advice are fairly harsh and most ppl don't like what I say. -
Be surprise.Originally posted by ^spidee^:They're not that harsh, just straightforward and very effective in tackling the problem. I wouldn't be surprised if you tell me you are a professional counsellor.
I am in IT Operations Tech Support ie helpdesk kind of thing - See computer, work on computer, play on computers almost 16 hours a day. HAHA
Low level job does not make my mind think ... I need an outlet. -
Icic.. that's mutually beneficial for the people you counsel and yourself then.Originally posted by mistyblue:Be surprise.
I am in IT Operations Tech Support ie helpdesk kind of thing - See computer, work on computer, play on computers almost 16 hours a day. HAHA
Low level job does not make my mind think ... I need an outlet. -
Free-lance? Professional enough? How good?Originally posted by mistyblue:If only human r/s are easy ...
I find now people are giving all sorts of stupid excuses to justify their own misdeeds and its become so sickening I rather live as a hermit.
BTW, you still looking for good massage Devil? U wiling to try free lance? -
You can forget about dramas.Originally posted by ^spidee^:Sigh, I wish things are indeed so simple and straighforward. Like in those TV dramas, where the family is so close-knit, relationships between husbands and wives, brothers and sisters, cousins, uncles, aunties, grandparents, etc are so cordial. I wonder if it's because my Dad and uncles work together, so they tend to quarrel often, that strains the family relations...
Sometimes situations in life can be much more DRAMATIC. -
I am the one doing it. How good .. depends on people.Originally posted by Devil1976:Free-lance? Professional enough? How good?
So far, the people I work on are colleagues and ex-colleagues - aunty category
They have leg issues, shoulder issues, carpral tunnel/arm pains.
BF is back/leg issues ..
Depends if you want "song" or to get something fixed.