Whats Wrong With Me
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Having a Smooth Sailing Relationship, but problems starts to crop up recently.
About her
She's Pretty Kind, and friendly.
Always trying to make everyone happy, trys make ppl's day.
very caring and concern, anything happens she's just concern about it.
Very easily persauded, when her friends just have to ask a her a few times and she will agree.
Naive and Innocent, She's not that experiance in relationship and in the outside world.
Forgetful and funloving.
Probs:
When She goes out with guy(s) alone, and I don't know about it,
until it happens or is over.
She leaves the conversation/sms sessions with long interval sometimes to 1/2hr to 5 hrs. She Don't even know I'm gone sometimes.
Anything Wrong She Say Sorry, and try to make it sound like its a one day issue. It makes her sorrys feel so worthless.
She doesn't know when i'm pissed angry or sad, she doesn't seem to understand me.
Some Guy is sometimes tagging along during our date, and she doesn't mind.
Whenever she's having fun with other guys or people, and i just stand there helplessly, because i can't gave her that fun.
She calls some other guy out for activities, not me, Even she knows I'm able to.
She Never Remembers our dates, but remembers some friends outing and all.
She does want to ask me question directly, always beats around the bushes and never getting to the point.
She doesn't like to tell me her problems and keeps it to herself.
Its obvious that the guy still likes her and yet she still goes out with him.
I know all the reasons and understanding behind these probs and action.
yet I'm always getting jealousy touch and pings all over my heart.
Sometimes it saddens me greatly.
I know why yet i feel sad. What Can I do ? -
You spoke to her about the issues?
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Yea I did. she says she would be more careful of her actions in future, but.
its still happening. -
Maybe u expect too much.
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How old are the both of you?Originally posted by ReliverX:Yea I did. she says she would be more careful of her actions in future, but.
its still happening.
Both your horoscopes?
Current occupations?
How long was it that you 1st started talking to her about the issues?
How many times you repeated yourself? Frequent?
What kind of attitude she took when you spoke up about things? (eg. admit mistake, thought it's ok, etc.) -
Originally posted by Devil1976:
I'm 18 and she's 17
How old are the both of you?
Both your horoscopes?
Current occupations?
How long was it that you [b]1st started talking to her about the issues?
How many times you repeated yourself? Frequent?
What kind of attitude she took when you spoke up about things? (eg. admit mistake, thought it's ok, etc.)[/b]
Aries, Virgo
Students.
for a week or 2.
I repeated myself once.
She will apologise, and stay silent looking very sad.
Does Horoscopes affect this some how ? -
Yea i think so.. too much ? Sigh.. I don know what to expect now.Originally posted by alexkusu:Maybe u expect too much. -
how long were u 2 together?
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Hmm... Somehow.. You're one who doesn't believe in horoscopes..?Originally posted by ReliverX:I'm 18 and she's 17
Aries, Virgo
Students.
for a week or 2.
I repeated myself once.
She will apologise, and stay silent looking very sad.
Does Horoscopes affect this some how ?
Nonetheless...
You're the more dominant type in a relationship. Likes to be in control. Like to know that you understand what's going on within the relationship.. From your own point.. To her point...
She on the other hand is more of the 'bochap' type... Sometimes it may feel that she's feeling guilty about certain things.. But her mentality is often the 'flowing' type.. Hence rather unstable mentality at this point... Likely to last for at least a few years down the line... Probably expect her to be in her 30s before things more or less 'stabilised' for her... If you haven't notice by now, she's a nature flirt... Doesn't necessarily means that she's a flirt, but just the nature ability to be one... 'Overly friendly' with guys which is something you have little tolerance for....
I would GUESS you're somehow ATTRACTED to her SOFT and FEMINE SIDE... SHE - holding a nature which seems to need alot of 'protection' from you... And YET.. As you try to HOLD her... GRAB HOLD of her...? You'll realise more and more that she cannot be so easily grasped, defined and understood. WHICH, can be VERY FRUSTRATING from YOUR STAND...
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virgos are naturally characters who oppose power, any form of coercion and infringement of personal space. maybe she doesnt get enough room whenever she is with you, that is why she goes out with other guys...
maybe you can soften your approach a bit. give her space. plenty of space. maybe she will learn to come back to you... just maybe, cos i dunno if it is too late.
good luck dude. -
Hmm it sounds alittle like wat i'm having now.Originally posted by Devil1976:Hmm... Somehow.. You're one who doesn't believe in horoscopes..?
Nonetheless...
You're the more dominant type in a relationship. Likes to be in control. Like to know that you understand what's going on within the relationship.. From your own point.. To her point...
She on the other hand is more of the 'bochap' type... Sometimes it may feel that she's feeling guilty about certain things.. But her mentality is often the 'flowing' type.. Hence rather unstable mentality at this point... Likely to last for at least a few years down the line... Probably expect her to be in her 30s before things more or less 'stabilised' for her... If you haven't notice by now, she's a nature flirt... Doesn't necessarily means that she's a flirt, but just the nature ability to be one... 'Overly friendly' with guys which is something you have little tolerance for....
I would GUESS you're somehow ATTRACTED to her SOFT and FEMINE SIDE... SHE - holding a nature which seems to need alot of 'protection' from you... And YET.. As you try to HOLD her... GRAB HOLD of her...? You'll realise more and more that she cannot be so easily grasped, defined and understood. WHICH, can be VERY FRUSTRATING from YOUR STAND...
In any case, is it a suggestion that the relationship woudn't last long ?
what has to be done or should be done ? -
erm, Can u help me define personal space ? I don really understand it.Originally posted by starblue:virgos are naturally characters who oppose power, any form of coercion and infringement of personal space. maybe she doesnt get enough room whenever she is with you, that is why she goes out with other guys...
maybe you can soften your approach a bit. give her space. plenty of space. maybe she will learn to come back to you... just maybe, cos i dunno if it is too late.
good luck dude.
Get enough room as in, no freedom ? -
first, no emotional blackmail. that will appear very controlling.Originally posted by ReliverX:erm, Can u help me define personal space ? I don really understand it.
Get enough room as in, no freedom ?
second, dun keep track of her actions. she will feel watched.
third, dun get too intensed when talking, or going on a date with her, like looking very long at her....
things like that... -
I may have done the third too much...Originally posted by starblue:first, no emotional blackmail. that will appear very controlling.
second, dun keep track of her actions. she will feel watched.
third, dun get too intensed when talking, or going on a date with her, like looking very long at her....
things like that...
Any other things i should do or not do ? -
you serious that you are in a relationship with her???
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Yea...Originally posted by Crappyz:you serious that you are in a relationship with her???
Its just that maybe she does not have much experiance ? -
hey ppl, what does it mean by expecting too much of a girlfriend?
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Doesn't mean this relationship can't last...Originally posted by ReliverX:Hmm it sounds alittle like wat i'm having now.
In any case, is it a suggestion that the relationship woudn't last long ?
what has to be done or should be done ?
One 'funny' thing about relationships... Some couples can be REAL COMPATIBLE... While others might be totally 'contradicting'... But ultimately, it's really how they see things and how they handle it...?
As much as your gf loves to go against your way and go out with guys... She really should be enjoying the concern and attention you're giving to her because of all that.. As long as you don't overdo things, she should be 'cool' with it... And as long as you don't really irritates her, she shouldn't give you 'bigger problems'... My GUESS is you should have already tasted 'bigger problems' before from her and understand clearly what I'm trying to say.... The INTERESTING PART in your relationship is that IF you couldn't be bother with her going out with other guys, that could give you some problems with her to...?
Hence, what I'm trying to say here is to REGULATE...
There's a REBEL NATURE in HER... She LOVES the way you're trying to CONTROL and YET YOU CAN'T... She loves the way she can 'overthrow' your DOMINANT NATURE.... It's a way of her telling you "she's really in control"... If you really care for the relationship, just keep the whole thing IN BALANCE... -
In this context? Overcontrolling in a way...?Originally posted by shama0:hey ppl, what does it mean by expecting too much of a girlfriend? -
Not sure is by some kind of coincidence, wat ur girl is doing kinda like wat i'm doing.Originally posted by ReliverX:Having a Smooth Sailing Relationship, but problems starts to crop up recently.
About her
She's Pretty Kind, and friendly.
Always trying to make everyone happy, trys make ppl's day.
very caring and concern, anything happens she's just concern about it.
Very easily persauded, when her friends just have to ask a her a few times and she will agree.
Naive and Innocent, She's not that experiance in relationship and in the outside world.
Forgetful and funloving.
Probs:
When She goes out with guy(s) alone, and I don't know about it,
until it happens or is over.
She leaves the conversation/sms sessions with long interval sometimes to 1/2hr to 5 hrs. She Don't even know I'm gone sometimes.
Anything Wrong She Say Sorry, and try to make it sound like its a one day issue. It makes her sorrys feel so worthless.
She doesn't know when i'm pissed angry or sad, she doesn't seem to understand me.
Some Guy is sometimes tagging along during our date, and she doesn't mind.
Whenever she's having fun with other guys or people, and i just stand there helplessly, because i can't gave her that fun.
She calls some other guy out for activities, not me, Even she knows I'm able to.
She Never Remembers our dates, but remembers some friends outing and all.
She does want to ask me question directly, always beats around the bushes and never getting to the point.
She doesn't like to tell me her problems and keeps it to herself.
Its obvious that the guy still likes her and yet she still goes out with him.
I know all the reasons and understanding behind these probs and action.
yet I'm always getting jealousy touch and pings all over my heart.
Sometimes it saddens me greatly.
I know why yet i feel sad. What Can I do ?
Maybe as wat starblue jie has said, u are not giving her room.
Or maybe, u do not interest her anymore. The relationship is waning.
Clarifying things might just iron out things. BUt at the same time it could be a dbl-edged sword. She might feel u don't trust her n tt u r pressurising her. -
Hmm...Originally posted by Devil1976:Doesn't mean this relationship can't last...
One 'funny' thing about relationships... Some couples can be REAL COMPATIBLE... While others might be totally 'contradicting'... But ultimately, it's really how they see things and how they handle it...?
As much as your gf loves to go against your way and go out with guys... She really should be enjoying the concern and attention you're giving to her because of all that.. As long as you don't overdo things, she should be 'cool' with it... And as long as you don't really irritates her, she shouldn't give you 'bigger problems'... My GUESS is you should have already tasted 'bigger problems' before from her and understand clearly what I'm trying to say.... The INTERESTING PART in your relationship is that IF you couldn't be bother with her going out with other guys, that could give you some problems with her to...? Hence, what I'm trying to say here is to REGULATE...
There's a REBEL NATURE in HER... She LOVES the way you're trying to CONTROL and YET YOU CAN'T... She loves the way she can 'overthrow' your DOMINANT NATURE.... It's a way of her telling you "she's really in control"... If you really care for the relationship, just keep the whole thing IN BALANCE...
I think I more on the offensive side, because I'm quite sensitive to words.
Besides, she doesn't know those words could made me think this way.
She tells me she's not interested in other guys, just going out with them wasn't anything but as a friend. This i understood. But i never told her that i didn't like her going out with other guys.
I don't think she's rebelling. She doesn't understand the relationship well because its still early and young. She's not that experiance relationships and i expect too much.
Just worried. Because, she's a soft and kind person,I was afraid of things to happen to her. thanks Devil.
For the explanation and enlightenment. -
I did try clarifying things,Originally posted by Gackt247:Not sure is by some kind of coincidence, wat ur girl is doing kinda like wat i'm doing.
Maybe as wat starblue jie has said, u are not giving her room.
Or maybe, u do not interest her anymore. The relationship is waning.
Clarifying things might just iron out things. BUt at the same time it could be a dbl-edged sword. She might feel u don't trust her n tt u r pressurising her.
She says she jealous of the time i went out with a gal alone.
The time she went out with other guys because She thought i didn't mind, which was my own doing because i told her i don mind at first.
Simply put I expect too much and she's doesn't really know whats going on.
My bad.
Clear things out, but i still didn't tell her i don want her to go out with guys alone, cause.. its her rights. and I'm in the wrong... -
Hmmm,
She forgets that this weekend I had a date with her,
And right in front of me she was going to reply, the guy who msg her that she was going to meet him for club some activities.
I was quite hurt then, i was deciding whether to remind her, on the spot.
then i just blurted out that "this is so sad, you forgot about what day that day was."
Man It hurts, from the afternoon till now.
is this right ? -
hoho brother...don't underestimate the power of the stars above...Originally posted by ReliverX:I'm 18 and she's 17
Aries, Virgo
Students.
for a week or 2.
I repeated myself once.
She will apologise, and stay silent looking very sad.
Does Horoscopes affect this some how ? -
well...as the cliche goes...these are just some test to your relationship...
anyways you all are just 17-18 years old...you have loads of time with you...
so my advice is...
JUST LOVE AND BE LOVED AND HAVE FUN LOVING
if it really doesn't work out or both of you need some spaces between each other...give it to each other...you cannot stick to each other like glue...you will get sick of it...