Being loyal in love..
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you misunderstood my questions. i asked some say attached to one guy/gal only even if you can't have her/him are touching..." what I meant by touching is the feeling 'gan tong', not pysically......Originally posted my radiance | mui_wan:been with my bf for 6 months. we've been seeing each other practically every single day.
touching is essential, but without verbal communication it's BS.
talking is essential too, but without substance in those talks and no skin contact is still sh_t.
if you can't touch for inevitable reasons, so be it.
but if you NEED to touch a member of the opposite sex besides your own partner just because you can't, it's not love is it? (-_-" ) not to mention, nOT loyal too.
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Hehe...how old are you and how old is she? what's she's and you're doing now??Origianlly posted by Patrik:Some see it as being devoted.
Some see it as plain stupidity.Why go for someone u cant get?
For me,this is my 5th year waiting. -
Yeah, but some females don't have the heart to break the guy's heart... so never tell them straight in the face...Originally posted by FeowFeow:Not really
I'd rather forego the money than be stuck with an unsavoury character 
It's just that my life can't stop just because someone thinks that by pestering me, I'll give them a chance No Fee1 Ling3 means No Fee1 Ling3.
FeowFeow
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Yes, you're right.Dunno about them. I also confused why they talk about physicall touch. Maybe my questions not clear enough. Let me reform my question.Originally posted by rainee:wait, I think I am not getting the point here. Why are people talking about physical contact here? I think the thread starter means, waiting for someone whom he can't have? As in that person is already attached to another person or he/she just doesn't have feeling towards the person who is waiting for him/her? If I am wrong, pls correct me
Some say waiting just for one person even tho' it's obvious that u cant have him/her are being devoted, loyal to love, but some see it as plain stupidity. What are your opinions? -
AND, it's very tedious to hafta return the gifts, so troublesome
FeowFeowOriginally posted by smudgey:Agreed....
Gan qing shi bu ke yi mian qiang de!!!
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Well, some do give out hints, but the guys also choose to ignore the hints
FeowFeowOriginally posted by DrTech:Yeah, but some females don't have the heart to break the guy's heart... so never tell them straight in the face... -
Well, some do give out hints, but the guys also choose to ignore the hints
FeowFeow
What are the hints? examples please. -
I told her twice during our Sec 4 days that I like her, but on both occasions, she never gave me an answer, so i presume she is not interested.Originally posted by DrTech:Does she even know? Or you quietly sit there and wait? -
"You'll always be my friend", "Currently, I'm happy being single/Not looking for a bf", etc are examples lorr
FeowFeowOriginally posted by ^mR.yellow^86:
Well, some do give out [b]hints, but the guys also choose to ignore the hints
FeowFeow
What are the hints? examples please.[/b] -
I think when u say 'touching', it's emotional and not physical right?
U need to rephrase ur questions wor.. start seeing pple misunderstand and talk about rape liao. -
Originally posted by browniebaobao:I think when u say 'touching', it's emotional and not physical right?
U need to rephrase ur questions wor.. start seeing pple misunderstand and talk about rape liao. very true
i was wondering what was the 1st reply all about lol. like 2 different topics
untill i realize 'touching' -
haha. answering the thread starter's qn
it depends on who the person is. as in different mindsets. some feel its stupid, some feel its worthwhile. etc
for me, if its really the one that i love, i wouldnt mind waiting -
erm... i dun get the rationale behind the qn....
how can you remain attached to someone when you know you will never have him/her?? wun that mean break up already??? or are you talking about long distance r/s where you are attached, but you will never be together forever unless one person migrates??
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I am turning 22 this month.She is 21 this year.Originally posted by ^mR.yellow^86:Hehe...how old are you and how old is she? what's she's and you're doing now??
She is an angel and i am a NSF now. -
forget about the word attach. maybe it is not the right term to use. what i mean is like this. The person rejected you in the first place. But u still cant let the person go in your heart cuz the feeling have grown 'mature' in you.Originally posted by starblueerm... i dun get the rationale behind the qn....
how can you remain attached to someone when you know you will never have him/her?? wun that mean break up already??? or are you talking about long distance r/s where you are attached, but you will never be together forever unless one person migrates?? -
I feel you bro...Originally posted by nanren4ever:I told her twice during our Sec 4 days that I like her, but on both occasions, she never gave me an answer, so i presume she is not interested.
So anyway, the ladies are right... sometimes the guys just choose to ignore the super-subtle hints... or maybe they didn't catch it...
Dread the ultimate "Let's Just be Friends"
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ladies, next time dun give hint hint ma...give the direct answer like yes or no. If a teacher was teaching the student and never give the answer, how do the student suppose to know whether they have answer the question correctly or not.
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Originally posted by ^mR.yellow^86:
After going thru your first post and subsequent posts,
Yes, you're right.Dunno about them. I also confused why they talk about physicall touch. Maybe my questions not clear enough. Let me reform my question.
[b]Some say waiting just for one person even tho' it's obvious that u cant have him/her are being devoted, loyal to love, but some see it as plain stupidity. What are your opinions?[/b]
I still dun understand what you are trying to convey.
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He's talking about people who can't let go... continually liking/loving the other party even though they know they can't have him/her...Originally posted by Magnus:After going thru your first post and subsequent posts,
I still dun understand what you are trying to convey.
It can be a good or bad thing... -
guys/girls concerned...i doubt love exists...
from my point of view, it's in his best interests to move on with his own life. -
OK.Originally posted by DrTech:He's talking about people who can't let go... continually liking/loving the other party even though they know they can't have him/her...
It can be a good or bad thing...
Think if the developement is of no consequence.
It's best to give up & move on.
Have Time slowly fade the feelings away.
Keep it locked in your heart- as fond memories.
Who knows, someday it may be reopened again?
This is what I feels. -
Originally posted by DrTech:He's talking about people who can't let go... continually liking/loving the other party even though they know they can't have him/her...
It can be a good or bad thing...
How can it be a good thing when you resist the idea of moving on? To resist the notion of moving on is to resist growth.
There is one bitter truth about people waiting: there is simply nothing to look forward, so they wait. Most people, who claim to wait for someone, often practice this what I call 'looking for the horse while riding the donkey'. If Love had you SO 'devoted'... so deep till you are 'left with no choice' but to wait... you will probably spent the rest of your life waiting this for meaningless someone and missed out opportunity on other potential partners. The TRUE form of waiting; is just to wait placidly until something happen. But the fact is that ultimately, these people moved on, with time, because they discovered it was impossible from the start.
You THINK he/she is the one for you... do you think you are the ONE for him/her?
Don't kid yourself - to wait for someone has NOTHING to do with loyalty and since it has nothing to do with it, what is so touching about people waiting aimlessly? Loyalty and devotion only applies to people who are IN A RELATIONSHIP... for anything else, it is foolishness and unacceptance.
I used to have people who swore to wait by me... for their own emotional agenda. I knew it was baseless and told them please don't make such comments, but they insisted in their own emotional ways. I laugh... not thinking that they are stupid, but rather, intrigued by how Love works.
These people are currently in their own relationship, revelling in bliss happiness. And obviously, I am happy for them to be able to exercise those loyalty in their current relationship instead of someone like me.
If you see devotion as a good characteristic, shouldn't you spent those precious quality on someone that is WORTH your devotion and not cover them up with a white lie by claiming that you are simply waiting and equates that to devotion.
These self-gratifying thoughts are merely tools to remain you in waiting list.
Cheers -
Hey, Yunhaier gave the most revalent, realistic and logic opnion of all...
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zhang xiao xian ever wrote in her novel..
there are two kinds of pple in this world.
1) bei deng de ren (waited by others)
2) deng dai de ren (wait for others)
but I wana change fate.. -
But I think ultimately, you have to ask yourself this.Originally posted by browniebaobao:zhang xiao xian ever wrote in her novel..
there are two kinds of pple in this world.
1) bei deng de ren (waited by others)
2) deng dai de ren (wait for others)
but I wana change fate..
Did you do anything to persue your happiness if you think that person is your whole life happiness? Or did you just plainly wait and wait and wait in silence?
If you had done something to persue your happiness, even if you fail in the end, think you should be able to tell yourself you've done your best to woo that person. Time doesn't matter in this situation then cause you never waste time.
But if you just sit there and wait and wait without doing anything, even if you wait for your whole life, then you'll just be a silly idiot who isn't moving forward.
No matter if you are the one waiting for others or others waiting for you, sometimes it's just not the right time to have the answer and the only way to have an answer is to move forward in life. If you don't have your answer now, move on. Waiting on the same spot won't change anything.
Example, there's a treasure chest 100m right in front and there are others in search for it. You saw it but you refuse to move an inch forward. Do you think the chest will move to you just because you are the one who saw it first? The answer is no. Move before the others saw it. Even if the others saw it, if you move fast enough, there'll still be a chance that you'll get the chest of treasure.
Logical?
It applies to me and that's what happen when I decide to woo my gf. And she's already my gf.