Love Complications...
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Pls stop thinking that she is the good one, everything that has happened is your fault and that she deserves a better person. In fact, I think she is the one who doesn't deserve you. Why? because first, she entered this r/s with you, giving you the reason that it is the most appropriate time for you to enter her life just because she recently broke up with her ex. What kinda reason is that? It is definitely not the reason to go into a r/s with someone.
i think she is just taking you as a rebound guy, and now that she is finally able to forget about her ex, she wants to discard you. From the way things go, I think she is trying to make you break up with her, by criticizing you and complaining about small and petty things.
And you said she is much more mature than you? She doesn't sound like a very mature person to me. -
Nope, I don't think she wants him to be better, she wants him to be perfect.
If I ever meet her, I'll ask her to pi$$ & use it as a mirror.
FeowFeowOriginally posted by ChairmanJay:OMG.. I understand how u feel. I think she is abit overboard. but for her high expectation means she really wants u to be better. hope tat wun happen to me..
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its good to be candid and straightforward abt it..fewofeow..
but the wae ur replying feowfeow..it might incur others' wrath..
a direct 'Nope,i dun think..'?
think before u write?
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hihi...sorry to say this...but i really think your gf is childish..i don think she is mature enough to be in a relationship.
it seems like you are being emotional abuse by her...you r still young,take your time n don rush in a relationship la..
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Hey guys, thanks for all your comments. Really appreciate it...
To tell u the truth, I agree wif wat most of u guys say. Dat maybe we r juz not compatible wif each other. But somehow try as I may, I can't seem to forget her at all... I tried to patch things up with her yesterday. I poured my heartfelt feelings out to her over the phone. But even after dat, when I asked her if she had anything to say, she juz said dat she was too lazy to say anything at this moment. But somehow, I could sense dat she was crying and I wld really hate myself if I made her cry over me... But before I called her, she sounded normal in her SMSes, asking me if I am alright or not and dat she agreed dat it was partly her fault for making me so insecure. Dat's y I took dat quite positively and when I talked to her over the phone, I asked her if she was willing to give me another chance and she said yes. I thought dat wld mean dat this 'episode' wld draw to a close very soon but I thought wrongly. She didn't reply at all to any of my SMSes last nite. I dunno if she was busy or she was juz thinking thru abt this whole thing. Even until this afternoon, she still hasn't replied!
By the way juz to let u guys know, after I told her dat I liked her and before she agreed to be my gf, I asked her if she needed time off to forget her ex and she said no. I thought dat there was really sth wrong even though she said no and dat was when I told her in an SMS dat I think I ought to step back for the time being and let her sort out her own feelings before we start our own r/s. But becoz of dat msg, she avoided me the whole day! By then I thought dat I made a huge mistake by telling her to take some time off and dat's y I immediately flocked to her so dat she had someone to seek comfort from. I hope dat answers curiousOrange's qn on y I did not run when she was emotionally unstable. She juz needed someone at dat time and I thought dat I could be dat someone.
And I totally agree wif Yunhaier. It is a COMPLETE MYSTERY as to whether she loves me or not. She told me yesterday dat she is the kind hu is not willing to divulge any of her problems to anyone. Not to her best of frens and even not to her own family. So I was thinking thru last nite, dat even if we got back together this time, I haf a very strong feeling dat the same problem will resurface the next time and wif a larger magnitude and at the most worst time of all(e.g. during my A lvls).
But I can't seem to forget her and deep down inside her, I believe dat she can't seem to forget me either... She told me once dat she was beginning to like me during dat course of our 1 mth together and I believe her for dat. So I am really at a loss here... -
sry i think she jus takes u as a rebound... dun hope too much tat tis relationship will last...
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maybe she is used to having a bf ard..and tell u something....gals likes the feeling of being liked by someone or being chased after...
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Thanks Yuko.
But how to sugar-coat the words?
Actually, what she wants is a perfect person when she isn't perfect herself?
Try sugar-coating my words lah, I just tell it like it is, don't wanna tax my brain too much
FeowFeowOriginally posted by yuko-ogura:its good to be candid and straightforward abt it..fewofeow..
but the wae ur replying feowfeow..it might incur others' wrath..
a direct 'Nope,i dun think..'?
think before u write? -
Because of your belief. It is messing you up.Originally posted by Lovelorn?:Hey guys, thanks for all your comments. Really appreciate it...
To tell u the truth, I agree wif wat most of u guys say. Dat maybe we r juz not compatible wif each other. But somehow try as I may, I can't seem to forget her at all... I tried to patch things up with her yesterday. I poured my heartfelt feelings out to her over the phone. But even after dat, when I asked her if she had anything to say, she juz said dat she was too lazy to say anything at this moment. But somehow, I could sense dat she was crying and I wld really hate myself if I made her cry over me... But before I called her, she sounded normal in her SMSes, asking me if I am alright or not and dat she agreed dat it was partly her fault for making me so insecure. Dat's y I took dat quite positively and when I talked to her over the phone, I asked her if she was willing to give me another chance and she said yes. I thought dat wld mean dat this 'episode' wld draw to a close very soon but I thought wrongly. She didn't reply at all to any of my SMSes last nite. I dunno if she was busy or she was juz thinking thru abt this whole thing. Even until this afternoon, she still hasn't replied!
By the way juz to let u guys know, after I told her dat I liked her and before she agreed to be my gf, I asked her if she needed time off to forget her ex and she said no. I thought dat there was really sth wrong even though she said no and dat was when I told her in an SMS dat I think I ought to step back for the time being and let her sort out her own feelings before we start our own r/s. But becoz of dat msg, she avoided me the whole day! By then I thought dat I made a huge mistake by telling her to take some time off and dat's y I immediately flocked to her so dat she had someone to seek comfort from. I hope dat answers curiousOrange's qn on y I did not run when she was emotionally unstable. She juz needed someone at dat time and I thought dat I could be dat someone.
And I totally agree wif Yunhaier. It is a COMPLETE MYSTERY as to whether she loves me or not. She told me yesterday dat she is the kind hu is not willing to divulge any of her problems to anyone. Not to her best of frens and even not to her own family. So I was thinking thru last nite, dat even if we got back together this time, I haf a very strong feeling dat the same problem will resurface the next time and wif a larger magnitude and at the most worst time of all(e.g. during my A lvls).
But I can't seem to forget her and deep down inside her, I believe dat she can't seem to forget me either... She told me once dat she was beginning to like me during dat course of our 1 mth together and I believe her for dat. So I am really at a loss here...
Trying to be rational and being practical is the department you seemed to fail.
You are being rational, but yet allowing your emotions to rule.
Indeed her attraction towards you is Love or not, is a mystery.
But we are sure you're a subsitute.
Can this subsitute figure nurture into a main role in her life? Can it nurture to Love? We won't know.
She obviously have excess bagguage and she needs someone to fill that role.
Her replies to tell you what kind of person she is like reveals her unwillingness to change, for you. Her emotions being unstable is natural and you might thought you are the someone for her to lean on.
Ever wondered that any other guys would have done the same and she'll accept them too? Give thought to it.
This might be a long struggle.
Cheers -
she like someone esle?
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I think much that needs to be said have already been..Originally posted by Lovelorn?:Hey guys, thanks for all your comments. Really appreciate it...
To tell u the truth, I agree wif wat most of u guys say. Dat maybe we r juz not compatible wif each other. But somehow try as I may, I can't seem to forget her at all... I tried to patch things up with her yesterday. I poured my heartfelt feelings out to her over the phone. But even after dat, when I asked her if she had anything to say, she juz said dat she was too lazy to say anything at this moment. But somehow, I could sense dat she was crying and I wld really hate myself if I made her cry over me... But before I called her, she sounded normal in her SMSes, asking me if I am alright or not and dat she agreed dat it was partly her fault for making me so insecure. Dat's y I took dat quite positively and when I talked to her over the phone, I asked her if she was willing to give me another chance and she said yes. I thought dat wld mean dat this 'episode' wld draw to a close very soon but I thought wrongly. She didn't reply at all to any of my SMSes last nite. I dunno if she was busy or she was juz thinking thru abt this whole thing. Even until this afternoon, she still hasn't replied!
By the way juz to let u guys know, after I told her dat I liked her and before she agreed to be my gf, I asked her if she needed time off to forget her ex and she said no. I thought dat there was really sth wrong even though she said no and dat was when I told her in an SMS dat I think I ought to step back for the time being and let her sort out her own feelings before we start our own r/s. But becoz of dat msg, she avoided me the whole day! By then I thought dat I made a huge mistake by telling her to take some time off and dat's y I immediately flocked to her so dat she had someone to seek comfort from. I hope dat answers curiousOrange's qn on y I did not run when she was emotionally unstable. She juz needed someone at dat time and I thought dat I could be dat someone.
And I totally agree wif Yunhaier. It is a COMPLETE MYSTERY as to whether she loves me or not. She told me yesterday dat she is the kind hu is not willing to divulge any of her problems to anyone. Not to her best of frens and even not to her own family. So I was thinking thru last nite, dat even if we got back together this time, I haf a very strong feeling dat the same problem will resurface the next time and wif a larger magnitude and at the most worst time of all(e.g. during my A lvls).
But I can't seem to forget her and deep down inside her, I believe dat she can't seem to forget me either... She told me once dat she was beginning to like me during dat course of our 1 mth together and I believe her for dat. So I am really at a loss here...
To add. You're quite a SENSITIVE CREATURE. Not to mention 'CALCULATIVE'. Probably the 'attraction thing' about you to her... Afterall, which woman won't enjoy someone who can be especially caring and concerned over her..?
I'm not sure if I should agree with the others on perhaps she already have the thought of leaving you but waiting for the right time... But somehow I just (personally) thinks that you're like a good piece of meat fed up to her mouth... Not exactly of her taste but nonetheless delicious enough to feed her...
Her problems... Sharing them with you? Like you've mentioned, she hardly share such with others... She would have naturally share them with you if you're of that 'calibre' but quite obviously (or at least in her eyes), you're not... Another way for her to share them with you is through the communications and trust developed within the relationship... Which is something seriously lacking here.. You're often busy with interpretations and 'maths', which makes you hardly in a truly involved state within the relationship.. BUT RATHER, more of a care-taking position...
ALL IN ALL, I think you would not find TRUE HAPPINESS with her... But should you learn to be more 'balanced' in your relationship adjustments (as the others have suggested), and 'weigh' less of things.. Your future relationship could very well be a very much brighter one... Hereby, I wish you luck...? -
haha..i juz feel that we shld be humble in the presence of others in the forum..this wae we can interact wif each other in a more harmonious manner..Originally posted by FeowFeow:Thanks Yuko.
But how to sugar-coat the words?
Actually, what she wants is a perfect person when she isn't perfect herself?
Try sugar-coating my words lah, I just tell it like it is, don't wanna tax my brain too much
FeowFeow
i feel that u might have agitated others in the process of penning down a v straightforward reply...unintentionally of course..it could be ur words that have caused me to feel this wae..but i guess a few ain't gonna hurt, do they?
that's why i dun quite like SMS-ing pple..it is devoid of emotions..the party ur SMS-ing to does not have the chance to see ur expression..consequently,the words determine ur expression..
but i DO like ur cheers..at least it brings a heartwarming smile to the reader..esp to the thread-starter..
so..
Cheers
+-yuko-+ -
Well, I dun think she likes someone else... Then again, I am not very sure coz she never lets me in on anything... And ya, juz to let u know: she is my 1st while I am her 7th...
M©+square is rite in saying dat maybe I am juz a substitute for her and nth else... But as to whether she loves me or not, I guess I wld haf to continue on in this r/s in order to find out... But I dun think I m willing to take the risk this time at the sacrifice of my studies and family. My family, esp my mum is very worried for me for the past few days and I've not exactly been keeping up wif my studies. I believe dat my obligation lies wif my family and my studies ultimately as they are my future. But I juz can't seem to let her go... And even if I can, I still want us to at least be frens but given her kind of character, I dun think it is possible... Haiz... -
can still be frens de..dun worrie ya?Originally posted by Lovelorn?:Well, I dun think she likes someone else... Then again, I am not very sure coz she never lets me in on anything... And ya, juz to let u know: she is my 1st while I am her 7th...
M©+square is rite in saying dat maybe I am juz a substitute for her and nth else... But as to whether she loves me or not, I guess I wld haf to continue on in this r/s in order to find out... But I dun think I m willing to take the risk this time at the sacrifice of my studies and family. My family, esp my mum is very worried for me for the past few days and I've not exactly been keeping up wif my studies. I believe dat my obligation lies wif my family and my studies ultimately as they are my future. But I juz can't seem to let her go... And even if I can, I still want us to at least be frens but given her kind of character, I dun think it is possible... Haiz...
to tell u the truth..i got rejected by a gurl earlier this yr(my assets not bad ok..
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she avoided me whenever i crossed paths wif her..even if we were to really meet face-to-face...like during CCA practices for which both of us were in the Chinese Orchestra group..we would juz put up a false smile on our faces..
this continued for 2 weeks after i got rejected..
after some time...i smsed her..asked her to forget wad happened...included the conclusion" lets be frens ya... "
she gave in and we became good frens...till now...
tho i admit that i still have feelings for her..i guess i will juz stay the wae i m until i've found another one whu can touch my heart the wae she did... -
Your case is totally different from his.Originally posted by yuko-ogura:can still be frens de..dun worrie ya?
to tell u the truth..i got rejected by a gurl earlier this yr(my assets not bad ok.. )...
she avoided me whenever i crossed paths wif her..even if we were to really meet face-to-face...like during CCA practices for which both of us were in the Chinese Orchestra group..we would juz put up a false smile on our faces..
this continued for 2 weeks after i got rejected..
after some time...i smsed her..asked her to forget wad happened...included the conclusion" lets be frens ya... "
she gave in and we became good frens...till now...
tho i admit that i still have feelings for her..i guess i will juz stay the wae i m until i've found another one whu can touch my heart the wae she did...
Your case - No BGR developed
His case - BGR developed and unhealthy situation.
Of cos there are possiblities which of his gf will agree being friends with him.
But looking at the sitaution, it takes a long time. Or NIL.
It all depends case by case basis.
Cheers -
kao..here im trying to console him..and there u are trying to spoil my plans..Originally posted by M©+square:Your case is totally different from his.
Your case - No BGR developed
His case - BGR developed and unhealthy situation.
Of cos there are possiblities which of his gf will agree being friends with him.
But looking at the sitaution, it takes a long time. Or NIL.
It all depends case by case basis.
Cheers
whose clone are u?? -
err dun think he is a clone...Originally posted by yuko-ogura:kao..here im trying to console him..and there u are trying to spoil my plans..
whose clone are u?? -
Originally posted by yuko-ogura:kao..here im trying to console him..and there u are trying to spoil my plans..
whose clone are u??
there are other ways to console.
I can see that you are sincere in comforting him i'd advise you to be practical in this case.
By the replies you gave to Feow2. I reckon you're quite a individual...sensitive?
Keep the contributions coming in!
p.s - i don't like Ogura, she's too act cute
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lol..so u've been noticing huh?
ya..ogura act cute type la..but she cute ma..unlike ruhua..acbc.. -
and from the wae ur protecting feow2...sth's not right...Originally posted by M©+square:
there are other ways to console.
I can see that you are sincere in comforting him i'd advise you to be practical in this case.
By the replies you gave to Feow2. I reckon you're quite a individual...sensitive?
Keep the contributions coming in!
p.s - i don't like Ogura, she's too act cute -
You ain't know me yet.Originally posted by yuko-ogura:lol..so u've been noticing huh?
ya..ogura act cute type la..but she cute ma..unlike ruhua..acbc.. 
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Protecting?Originally posted by yuko-ogura:and from the wae ur protecting feow2...sth's not right...
I'm just stating the facts. Again, i've proved my point - sensitive.
Cheers -
ya...i m sensitive..Originally posted by M©+square:Protecting?
I'm just stating the facts. Again, i've proved my point - sensitive.
Cheers
sensitive to how u protect feow..
not afraid maox2 the bacon chef whack u meh? -
Mao is my bro hao bu hao...Originally posted by yuko-ogura:ya...i m sensitive..
sensitive to how u protect feow..
not afraid maox2 the bacon chef whack u meh?
noob, go check out what you and who you're dealing with can or not?
Cheers -
out of topic liao laOriginally posted by yuko-ogura:ya...i m sensitive..
sensitive to how u protect feow..
not afraid maox2 the bacon chef whack u meh?