Love Complications...

• Lovelorn?

  22 Dec 05, 15:30

  ..........................
  
  Hahaz! U guys r quite funny...
  In a way, thanx 4 cheering me up...
• M©+square

  22 Dec 05, 15:31

  Originally posted by rainee:

  out of topic liao la

  Thanks Rainee for 'protecting' me.
  
  
  i feel somethings cooking MC sensitive mode on.
  
  Cheers
• rainee

  22 Dec 05, 15:31

  Originally posted by M©+square:

  Thanks Rainee for 'protecting' me.
  
  
  i feel somethings cooking MC sensitive mode on.
  
  Cheers

  u wan my ai ai to come after u?
• curiousOrange

  22 Dec 05, 15:32

  Originally posted by Lovelorn?:

  By the way juz to let u guys know, after I told her dat I liked her and before she agreed to be my gf, I asked her if she needed time off to forget her ex and she said no. I thought dat there was really sth wrong even though she said no and dat was when I told her in an SMS dat I think I ought to step back for the time being and let her sort out her own feelings before we start our own r/s. But becoz of dat msg, she avoided me the whole day! By then I thought dat I made a huge mistake by telling her to take some time off and dat's y I immediately flocked to her

  A lot of guys would have done the same thing as you did.
  
  A lot of guys out there have that “I am a Superhero” mentality. They think their role is to save sad little damsels who are in distress. I would have done exactly the same thing as you did ten years ago.
  
  So I didnÂ’t say all that to mock youÂ…so many of us guys have the same problem!
  
  But you have to be realistic about things. Drop that hero mentality and protect your heart first and foremost.
  
  Because it is too early in the relationship for you to commit so much. You donÂ’t even know her well at this point!
  
  You will only offer to help her and support her IF sheÂ’s found to be worthyÂ…you have to qualify her first!
  
  Two other points you might find useful and applicable (not only to your relationship but other aspects of your life as well):
  
  1) Always trust your gut
  
  Women have their six sense or instinct as they like to call it. Men have our gut.
  
  When your gut is telling you, “I believe she needs time off to forget her ex !”
  
  You stay firm to what you believe and donÂ’t ever let her little actions sway your opinion! Your Gut is your best friend. Learn to listen to it always.
  
  2) Insecurity
  
  

  Originally posted by Lovelorn?:

  But before I called her, she sounded normal in her SMSes, asking me if I am alright or not and dat she agreed dat it was partly her fault for making me so insecure.

  You have a wrong concept.
  
  She cannot MAKE you insecure.
  
  A better way to understand this Â… you ARE insecure because of your lack of confidence and she smells it, so she made full use of it.
  
  Therefore, even if she stops playing those mind games. You will still be insecure because of your lack of confidence.
  
  And you are conveniently avoiding the root of your problem by having all these emotional talks with her when you should be spending more time working on your confidence and sorting out your own insecurity.
  
  Your insecurity stopped you from listening to your gut. When she ignores you for a day, all your reasoning went out of the window and blindly rushed into the relationship fearing that you might lose her.
  
  Your insecurity allows you to feel inferior in front of her. That is why you are always asking her for forgiveness even when it is not your fault.
  
  If you decide to stay in this relationship, you will still have to work on your insecurity.
  
  Good luck and take care.
  
• M©+square

  22 Dec 05, 15:33

  Originally posted by Lovelorn?:

  ..........................
  
  Hahaz! U guys r quite funny...
  In a way, thanx 4 cheering me up...

  Hey No problem!!! as long as you feel entertained!
  
  Cheers
• M©+square

  22 Dec 05, 15:34

  Originally posted by curiousOrange:
  
  
  You have a wrong concept.
  
  She cannot MAKE you insecure.
  
  [b]A better way to understand this … you ARE insecure because of your lack of confidence and she smells it, so she made full use of it.
  
  Therefore, even if she stops playing those mind games. You will still be insecure because of your lack of confidence.
  
  And you are conveniently avoiding the root of your problem by having all these emotional talks with her when you should be spending more time working on your confidence and sorting out your own insecurity.
  
  Your insecurity stopped you from listening to your gut. When she ignores you for a day, all your reasoning went out of the window and blindly rushed into the relationship fearing that you might lose her.
  
  Your insecurity allows you to feel inferior in front of her. That is why you are always asking her for forgiveness even when it is not your fault.
  
  If you decide to stay in this relationship, you will still have to work on your insecurity.
  
  Good luck and take care.
  [/b]

  Good stuff.
  
  Cheers
• Mao x 2

  22 Dec 05, 15:38

  Originally posted by M©+square:

  Mao is my bro hao bu hao...
  
  noob, go check out what you and who you're dealing with can or not?
  
  Cheers

  Yes.. Bro! You looking for me?
  Wah...how come I got dragged into this as well..
• Lovelorn?

  22 Dec 05, 15:38

  Wow! curiousOrange juz woke me up! I totally, absolutely believe him wifout a shadow of a doubt! Man, how could I have been so foolish? Hahaz! U know wat? U r quite experienced in this... R u like a love guru or sth?
• yuko-ogura

  22 Dec 05, 15:40

  hey Msquare..lol..juz kidding la..dun take it to heart hor..
  
  as long as our fren here gets humoured..i din mind getting bullied la..haha..
• M©+square

  22 Dec 05, 15:41

  Originally posted by Mao x 2:

  Yes.. Bro! You looking for me?
  Wah...how come I got dragged into this as well..

  No lah. some oldbie/midbie trying to be funny la.
• yuko-ogura

  22 Dec 05, 15:42

  Originally posted by M©+square:

  No lah. some oldbie/midbie trying to be funny la.

  trying to imply me being newbie ar..haha..
  
  peace peace!to each his own ok?
  
  
• M©+square

  22 Dec 05, 15:42

  Originally posted by Lovelorn?:

  Wow! curiousOrange juz woke me up! I totally, absolutely believe him wifout a shadow of a doubt! Man, how could I have been so foolish? Hahaz! U know wat? U r quite experienced in this... R u like a love guru or sth?

  Now that you woke up. I trust that you know how to deal with it already right?
  
  Cheers
• yuko-ogura

  22 Dec 05, 15:43

  Originally posted by M©+square:

  Now that you woke up. I trust that you know how to deal with it already right?
  
  Cheers

  hey ya lor...good luck leh..sure can do it de..juz be confident abt it k?
• Mao x 2

  22 Dec 05, 15:43

  Originally posted by M©+square:

  No lah. some oldbie/midbie trying to be funny la.

  So desu ne... where's my peanut butter cookies?
  
• Mao x 2

  22 Dec 05, 15:44

  Originally posted by Lovelorn?:

  Wow! curiousOrange juz woke me up! I totally, absolutely believe him wifout a shadow of a doubt! Man, how could I have been so foolish? Hahaz! U know wat? U r quite experienced in this... R u like a love guru or sth?

  All the best, pal!
  
• M©+square

  22 Dec 05, 15:44

  Originally posted by yuko-ogura:

  trying to imply me being newbie ar..haha..
  
  peace peace!to each his own ok?
  
  

  i said OLDbie.....you've been in this forum long enough to know what is going on.
  
  Don't try to bluff me. Otherwise, you jialat. Haha
  
  Cheers
• M©+square

  22 Dec 05, 15:45

  Originally posted by Mao x 2:

  So desu ne... where's my peanut butter cookies?
  

  Cannot like that demand one la. *whistle*
  
  You gimme money to buy ingredients.
  
  Cheers
• yuko-ogura

  22 Dec 05, 15:45

  Originally posted by M©+square:

  i said OLDbie.....you've been in this forum long enough to know what is going on.
  
  Don't try to bluff me. Otherwise, you jialat. Haha
  
  Cheers

  no lor..haha..i only less than a week old nia!
• Lovelorn?

  22 Dec 05, 15:46

  Yah... I shld be able to deal wif it now! Thanx to all! Hahaz! Wld u mind if I post sth up again in the future if I ever do get any more problems? Thanx again!
• M©+square

  22 Dec 05, 15:47

  Originally posted by yuko-ogura:

  no lor..haha..i only less than a week old nia!

  Help me to say hi to your father your son and Chinaman.
  
  Cheers
• Mao x 2

  22 Dec 05, 15:50

  Originally posted by M©+square:

  Cannot like that demand one la. *whistle*
  
  You gimme money to buy ingredients.
  
  Cheers

  
• M©+square

  22 Dec 05, 15:53

  Originally posted by Mao x 2:

  

  Kidding la...
• Mao x 2

  22 Dec 05, 15:55

  Originally posted by M©+square:

  Kidding la...

  I don't have money wor...
  Do you accept BACON or Watermelons for an exchange?
• yuko-ogura

  22 Dec 05, 15:57

  Originally posted by Lovelorn?:

  Yah... I shld be able to deal wif it now! Thanx to all! Hahaz! Wld u mind if I post sth up again in the future if I ever do get any more problems? Thanx again!

  lol..juz continue to post la!dats wad sgforums is for!
  
  dun worrie la..Mcube,squashed-orange and cute-yuko will help u..maox2 too...
  
  
• FeowFeow

  22 Dec 05, 16:22

  
  
  Tell you what, I appoint you my words-sugar-coater, ok?
  
  I go in, tell it like it is, you say it nicely for me, yah? Can go like, "What FeowFeow meant was.................... blah blah blah"
  
  To me, most important is that the party gets an objective view, or even help if I can give it. Don't expect me to tax my brain further by sugar-coating the words. Sometimes, straight talking is most effective
  
  Thanks in advance hor, my words-sugar-coater
  
  FeowFeow
  
  

  Originally posted by yuko-ogura:

  haha..i juz feel that we shld be humble in the presence of others in the forum..this wae we can interact wif each other in a more harmonious manner..
  
  i feel that u might have agitated others in the process of penning down a v straightforward reply...unintentionally of course..it could be ur words that have caused me to feel this wae..but i guess a few ain't gonna hurt, do they?
  
  that's why i dun quite like SMS-ing pple..it is devoid of emotions..the party ur SMS-ing to does not have the chance to see ur expression..consequently,the words determine ur expression..
  
  but i DO like ur cheers..at least it brings a heartwarming smile to the reader..esp to the thread-starter..
  
  so..
  
  Cheers
  +-yuko-+