A Heartless Cad...a true story
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Hi all,
my friend told me a very sad story which I would like to share with you..
She thought she had it allÂ…a perfect husband, a 2-yr toddler, a good career, a newly acquired flat and a car. She was grateful for her good fortune but never thought that all will come crashing down when she had her second pregnancyÂ…
Her husband, for unknown reason, went into shock and could not accept it even though the second child is mutually agreed upon initially. On her visit to her gynae, she and her husband were informed that it could be a rare case of non-developing fetus and to be given two more weeks for further observation by then an abortion will be done, should the growth be stagnant. Her husband went ahead to Japan for business trip on the day of clinical appointment without offering to lend any support. She was devastated when told that there is going to be no baby after all and has to go through with the abortive day surgery.
Thereafter their marriage went downhill without her knowing why as her husband became cold and distantÂ… He distanced himself so much that she could no longer bear it and moved out of the flat with her son. It was 1 month later that she heard from his cousin that he had committed adultery and the business trip was in fact a rendezvous with a married Japanese woman. His lover is scheduled to move to Singapore to live with him.
She accepted her husbandÂ’s change of heart and without further delay, initiated the divorce to give way to the couple. She declined her rightful matrimonial contribution from her husband as she knows that her husband does not earn much and has to do his part for his loverÂ’s lodging.
Subsequently, he wept pitifully at every stage of the divorce proceedingsÂ…Â…requesting my friend not to proceed further. He even said that the Nihon romance is over and will not resume even if he is divorced, as he is now sobered to know that his lover who has low moral values. My friend did not bulge in her decision because while he claimed that it is over, both he and his lover are still spotted often together round the island. When questioned, he said it was on the ground that he is just helping her, a foreigner in Singapore.
During this period, he left his company scandalized, as his peers learnt quickly of what he has committed. He progresses well in his new company, since no one knows what he has done before.
My friend and her son are the ones who are paying for his error as she struggles with her house, job and her son. Day in, day out, she rushed from childcare center to work, work to childcare center. Back home, she has to handle their meals and household chores. She refused to burden her family with what has happened to her. She carried all these out silently and can only weep into the darkness of the night after her son has gone to bed.
After the divorce, he completely complies with my friendÂ’s wishes and didnÂ’t bother to enquire after them, even though he knew about their pitiful plight.
Her son began asking for his daddy when he turned 3. Feeling guilty and tormented, she called his ex-husband and asked if he would like to visit his son. He agreed, and the boy delightedly took to his father.
He told my friend that he is equally pitiful as he wanders at a loss during the night and have had no one for company. He works long hours to numb his sorrow and guilt.
Upon hearing that and for the sake of her son, she took her son to his company premises and asked forgiveness from her ex-husband for her impulsiveness at filing divorce. Oh boy, was he furious when he learnt of this. He verbally slashed out at her and refused to meet them for fear that his peers in his new company will come to know what he has done. He threatened my friend and left them waiting by the road side. He only showed his face and forced them home when he saw them leaving the premises for the coffee store nearby. Surprise of surprise, he reprimanded her ruthlessly when she suggested reversing the flat ownership and reinstating their marriage.
It was later that she realized with a few facts from his family that all he said is a pack of lies and it is just a clever plot played by him. He has been staying out, sleeping at his lover’s place and he is not as pitiful as he seems. He is still dock out in his best personal clothes and grooming. He has changed new phones while my friend could not afford one. He has cleverly strategized his moves to have my friend proceed with divorce while he acted the “good” guy who wants to salvage the marriage… once the objective is attain, he finally showed his true colours and motives.
For such a shameless cad, I see the need to have justice done and his deed exposed. He is getting scot-free and enjoying the success of his career, his woman without paying a single cent for the family he has abandoned while my friend (with her toddler) is paying a high price for his sin.
He is working in a US-based leading EMS (electronics manufacturing services) provider (located in Changi South Lane) who bought over the local firm JIT Holdings back in Aug 2000. From what I last know, he is handling a project under Hewlett Packard.
Although he has good looks and seemingly goody-two-shoes image, he is rotten to the core Â…
Hey folks out there, if you happen to know who he is, be forewarnedÂ… donÂ’t be deceived by him. Remember still water runs deepÂ…and I hope he will have his just retributions soon. -
I PM you.
This thread shall be locked till further notice.
Dec 23 2.28pm
Thread re-open and monitored.
Please keep views and comments objective. No flaming please.
Cheers -
You REGISTERED JUST TO TELL US THIS
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With the alarming increase in divorce rates at our present era, of which the main root causes are being traced back to infidelity and adultery, I would like to use my friend's story to drive across the message that this sin is totally intolerable. The sinner usually gets scot free with the victims having to pay the heavy price. It is the same analogy as the case of drug users where the momentary pleasure brings the consequential disastrous impact on their loved ones.Originally posted by Devil1976:You REGISTERED JUST TO TELL US THIS
As a friend, I can really feel my friend's sorrow & heartbrokeness as she tries to come to terms with it. Life is a very difficult path and she has to walk it alone.. more heartfelt to drive the message across.
So for those who are tempted with the forbidden fruit, pls THINK TWICE! -
Smear Campaign
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Dear Skyward,
Whilst I do understand your anger at this matter and the feeling of injustice done to your friend, perhaps you may take note that in future, don't give so many specifics in your post. The guy may have his reasons for doing so, & until we hear it, we shouldn't take matters into our own hands just because of some hear-say.
You may wish to substantiate those hear-say things with evidence before you believe too many rumours & words.
FeowFeowOriginally posted by skyward:With the alarming increase in divorce rates at our present era, of which the main root causes are being traced back to infidelity and adultery, I would like to use my friend's story to drive across the message that this sin is totally intolerable. The sinner usually gets scot free with the victims having to pay the heavy price. It is the same analogy as the case of drug users where the momentary pleasure brings the consequential disastrous impact on their loved ones.
As a friend, I can really feel my friend's sorrow & heartbrokeness as she tries to come to terms with it. Life is a very difficult path and she has to walk it alone.. more heartfelt to drive the message across.
So for those who are tempted with the forbidden fruit, pls THINK TWICE! -
you can never stop the world from sin.
so why bother? -
To add on to FF's words, I seriously don't think you should be posting this in here especially with so much information of the guy.Originally posted by FeowFeow:Dear Skyward,
Whilst I do understand your anger at this matter and the feeling of injustice done to your friend, perhaps you may take note that in future, don't give so many specifics in your post. The guy may have his reasons for doing so, & until we hear it, we shouldn't take matters into our own hands just because of some hear-say.
You may wish to substantiate those hear-say things with evidence before you believe too many rumours & words.
FeowFeow
May I ask if your friend knows of you posting her story in here? I'm not very well verse in law but then if her ex-husband knew of this, you could be sued for flaming and it could deteriored yoru friend's chance to fight for alimony.
My suggestion for you is to stop this post immediately and suggest to your friend to engage a PI to gather evidence of her ex-husband's affair and his current income status. It won't save her marriage (not worth saving either if it's of what you commented) but she can and has the rights to fight for higher alimony and child support from the ex-husband. It'll in a way help to lessen her financial burden a bit. -
shifubushihuo shihuoduobuguo
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everybody makes mistakes, but it's up to the person who commit the mistakes to repent their faults or not. If you want other people to avoid this person in particular (which holds a good intention) but i think you have made the wrong move.
It isn't right to reveal so much details of the person...if you have noticed in the newspapers or news, no matter how bad the person is who have committed a crime or whatsoever, the media and the law will not reveal all the things that they know, as they have their own privacy, and this is something that perhaps you would like to take into consideration as well should you happen to write another simiar articles in sgforums in future...
while its of truly good intention, but if the person by sheer chance happens to see this post that you have posted...he may take you to court...(worse case scenerio)..thus whatever things you write in post or try to warn others, you may hint people or sue the person or even seek media help (channel U there's a hotline - proven to be the fastest and best way to get problems solved F.O.C), but don't reveal too much details....you have to respect their privacy...
i hope your friend can find the right channels and gets back what she deserve.. -
It's either libel or slander, I can't remember which
I think libel
FeowFeowOriginally posted by laosu:To add on to FF's words, I seriously don't think you should be posting this in here especially with so much information of the guy.
May I ask if your friend knows of you posting her story in here? I'm not very well verse in law but then if her ex-husband knew of this, you could be sued for flaming and it could deteriored yoru friend's chance to fight for alimony.
My suggestion for you is to stop this post immediately and suggest to your friend to engage a PI to gather evidence of her ex-husband's affair and his current income status. It won't save her marriage (not worth saving either if it's of what you commented) but she can and has the rights to fight for higher alimony and child support from the ex-husband. It'll in a way help to lessen her financial burden a bit. -
no names mentioned, so it should be ok.
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Either lah, I'm trying my best in my english!! LOLOriginally posted by FeowFeow:It's either libel or slander, I can't remember which
I think libel
FeowFeow -
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No lah, these are legal terms, & the best person who'll know is Oceanus, I think
FeowFeowOriginally posted by laosu:Either lah, I'm trying my best in my english!! LOL -
Originally posted by FeowFeow:No lah, these are legal terms, & the best person who'll know is Oceanus, I think
FeowFeow -
the woman is also silly lor.. left him liao wat for bring the son back to him.. that's really a stupid thing to do. Altho they may be related by blood. But heck, he was the one who let them down.
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People come and go, feelings appear and fade. What to do? He might be a flirt now, yet when he met TRUE love with another girl and that girl truly love him too, who is to judge him?
kids != super glue that glues couples together
(!= is not equal. Programming operator.) -
jus wonderin..wats a Cad?
poor friend of urs btw. I try not to go to Japan on business trips. -
LOL!Originally posted by alexkusu:jus wonderin..wats a Cad?
poor friend of urs btw. I try not to go to Japan on business trips.
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If the guy kena anything for this, it will be just retribution. Someone who did something like that should not get away scot-free.
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This world is not running of objective logic and justice
lots of bad ppl get away with murder
lots of good ppl get what they do not deserve -
want to tell story tell halfway.. wat his coy just acquired which coy, work in changi south? wat's the point.
u wanna tell the story objectively to do a public service by warning potential victims go ahead and do it clean, or else just whack his name and ic number lar?
half fark for wat? discredits yourself really.
good luck to your friend, if the story is real. -
Pardon me to speak... But your story would suggest more of an indirect FLAME than a 'story of heed'?Originally posted by skyward:With the alarming increase in divorce rates at our present era, of which the main root causes are being traced back to infidelity and adultery, I would like to use my friend's story to drive across the message that this sin is totally intolerable. The sinner usually gets scot free with the victims having to pay the heavy price. It is the same analogy as the case of drug users where the momentary pleasure brings the consequential disastrous impact on their loved ones.
As a friend, I can really feel my friend's sorrow & heartbrokeness as she tries to come to terms with it. Life is a very difficult path and she has to walk it alone.. more heartfelt to drive the message across.
So for those who are tempted with the forbidden fruit, pls THINK TWICE!
Besides... Water runs deep within.. For many cases of adultery or infidelity, there could be stories within stories... And of course, many of personal choices...
Personally, I feel that your story does not specifically make a clear cut point nor serve much of a direct 'educational' purpose... -
You know what? I find that among all the responses to this subject, this is the one that really touches the chord in my heart. Ultimately it is we ourselves who are responsible for what we do and act.Originally posted by dragg:you can never stop the world from sin.
so why bother?
It's like what binarynwitz and mistyblue have said, wrongdoer do get scot-free (he may found true love and live happily ever after) and the kind-hearted ones may not get rewarded at the end of the day. We can't control and judge the others.
Anyway like what my friend (the 'single mum') has told me, no matter what happen, life still goes on and is full of challenges. It is better to admit as much and to decide to be happy in spite of it all!!