Guys paying for girls...
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This seemed like a very good place to get advice... So here goes...
I just went to Poly and joined a CCA. There is this guy who insists he fell in love with me after I met him once at the CCA, and has been chasing me until now, which is like 2 semesters liao. He insists on paying for my meals and movie tickets whenever I go out with him, and because we don't have any common friends, I feel very uncomfortable going out with him alone. I made it clear from the start that I did not have any feelings for him, and he told me he knows and just wants to be friends. But would friends pay all the meals and movie tix and buy a birthday present over $100 for a girl who isn't even specially nice to them?
Then becuz I feel uncomfortable with going out with him alone, I will ask him to join my frenz or ask him to bring his frenz along. Then whenever I do that he will sulk or get angry (frustrated) and say things like, "I want to spend time alone with you" or "I don't have any friends. I only have you". But he told me he knew I didn't want to be more than friends wat... Then how do you explain his behavior?
I dunno I get these kind of cases a lot, when guys just think that if they go out with me they have to pay for every single thing I do. I mean maybe movie can la but plus every meal the guy so poor thing la... More so if they work for the money. Then if a guy wooing a girl doesn't pay for her stuff does that mean she will reject you? I wouldn't, but I don't noe about other girls. Just very curious about this.
And I donno whether this is common, but whenever I like a guy, when he likes me back, I realise I don't like him already. Why ah? I think I quite alone in that trait cuz normally is the other way around. (eg: U like someone then when you give up the person likes you.) I am wondering whether it has to do with my inability to commit or something. Maybe I don't like being tied down or pressured. Does anyone have similiar cases?
What a way to start the new year man... I hope everyone will enjoy their hols and new year and ang pows... -
On the contrary it is quite normal to feel that your liking for someone has faded once you know that person likes you just as much. Maybe it is because of the human being's tendency to want something that is not theirs yet. Maybe it has something to do with our tendency to take something as granted once we have it.
As about the guy wanting to pay for your meal and everything, he is doing it out of his own willingness right? Try telling him again that you will never develop any feelings for him no matter how much he spend on you and if he continues to do it, then there is nothing much you can do I suppose. Or you can just directly refuse to accept money from him. It should be really up to you, you have the power to not accept. Sooner or later, if you keep this up, he will understand and hopefully leave you alone. -
Sounds to me that the guy is a domineering and possessive type and easily jealous. Well, paying for the girl is quite a common culture in dates. But for me i cannot effort to do what that guy is doing, i will mostly pay for movies and sometimes meals.
To me, you maybe afraid that the guy u like will pay for everything again, which you does not like. Just my thoughts, maybe you and try and talk this throught before going in to a r/s.
All the best -
the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence.
human nature is greed n discontentment.
try to avoid going out with him, it may be sending him the wrong signals.
he sure is possessive, i don't think many gals can stand him.
what is the meaning of he only have u???
that's meant he is a liar or he don't have a life b4 he met u???
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Welcome to the growing up process. Everyone has to go through this phase to experience what is life. You must be a attractive lady to have so many guys going after you.Originally posted by theoneguru:This seemed like a very good place to get advice... So here goes...
I just went to Poly and joined a CCA. There is this guy who insists he fell in love with me after I met him once at the CCA, and has been chasing me until now, which is like 2 semesters liao. He insists on paying for my meals and movie tickets whenever I go out with him, and because we don't have any common friends, I feel very uncomfortable going out with him alone. I made it clear from the start that I did not have any feelings for him, and he told me he knows and just wants to be friends. But would friends pay all the meals and movie tix and buy a birthday present over $100 for a girl who isn't even specially nice to them?
Then becuz I feel uncomfortable with going out with him alone, I will ask him to join my frenz or ask him to bring his frenz along. Then whenever I do that he will sulk or get angry (frustrated) and say things like, "I want to spend time alone with you" or "I don't have any friends. I only have you". But he told me he knew I didn't want to be more than friends wat... Then how do you explain his behavior?
I dunno I get these kind of cases a lot, when guys just think that if they go out with me they have to pay for every single thing I do. I mean maybe movie can la but plus every meal the guy so poor thing la... More so if they work for the money. Then if a guy wooing a girl doesn't pay for her stuff does that mean she will reject you? I wouldn't, but I don't noe about other girls. Just very curious about this.
And I donno whether this is common, but whenever I like a guy, when he likes me back, I realise I don't like him already. Why ah? I think I quite alone in that trait cuz normally is the other way around. (eg: U like someone then when you give up the person likes you.) I am wondering whether it has to do with my inability to commit or something. Maybe I don't like being tied down or pressured. Does anyone have similiar cases?
What a way to start the new year man... I hope everyone will enjoy their hols and new year and ang pows...
Ok back to topic. You cannot stop someone from going after you but you can declare to him that he should not be sulking or frustrated if he wants to remain friends with you. If he presist in his behaviour then say you are sorry is time to go. You have given him a chance to be your friend but if he wants to think otherwise is time to leave him.
You have not given your heart to anyone yet and you feel that you still want to enjoy life as a single. Is perfectly normal, you are still young and pretty go out and enjoy the beautiful world. Travel around and see the world. -
What is your Zodiac Sign?
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well about u falling for a guy and when the guy came back to like u..ur feeling for him has already died..i think the problem may lies in u..have u ever confess to the guy? if u haven that might b the likely cause..becos u might show trails that u like the guy but u dont confess..the guy wont noe..in the end when the guy finally gather enough courage to woo u..ur feeling has already died..
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Suck him dry since he wants to be a sucker.
Yeah baby, yeah.
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Sounds like a possesive guy
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YEAH!Originally posted by charlize:Suck him dry since he wants to be a sucker.
Yeah baby, yeah. -
i'm glad u have told him veri cleary tht u aren't interested in him, so in tis case, its really up to him, if he wanna spend money then let him be cause u have made things clear.
wat puzzles me is tht y do u still bother to go out with him? since u r in such a awakard position, jus get out of it by refusing lor, its ur free will really & it takes 2 hands to clap.
hhhhmmm, bout the part refering to not liking the person again, i guess thts normal when u r still in ur teenage yrs cause ur preference change when time goes by. u'll know when its time to settle down when ur prefereneces has been stable for sometime. another reason is tht maybe u haven been seeing each pther so no more feelings liao lor -
If all else fails, tell him you treat him like a brother only.
But damn if he is into kinky relationships. -
Maybe by allowing Urself to go out with him on 'dates' may give him the wrong signals tt he still haf chance and with time and more efforts, he can win Ur heart...
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I fully agreed that you might/are sending the wrong signals to him! If you really dun like him, dont even go out with him, or chit chat with him to give him false hope. I m not branding all gals are the same but then, unless you got slight feelings for him, try not to go out alone too often with him. He will mistaken that for "interest" in him.....
Do you go out often with a good fren or yrs? No right? Then y are u going out often and alone with him? If you treat him jus like a fren, then you shld know wat to do...
Even if he insists on paying, i m sure you can jolly well return him the money forcefully right? You can say something like "take it, i dun like you to pay. if you dun, next time dont come out"
Well, some gals are like this. They think they cant reject, and blame it on the guy leh...but then, some guys were jus being gentleman....haha..i think they will be more than glad to take back the money, esp for a not too close gal fren! -
If u think he has no chance to be ur bf or any feeling for him, u shld'nt give any wrong signal to him by going out alone with him too frequently unless u consider him as ur good friend or buddy.
Paying for movie tickets, food drinks i agree that it's common for guy to pay for his partner, but as for normal frenZ, it does not occur too often. I dun offer to pay everything for my galfrenZ, definitely it will give a wrong intention to her.
If u happen to go out with him again, insist on paying by urself. -
Hmm....HeeOriginally posted by theoneguru:This seemed like a very good place to get advice... So here goes...
I just went to Poly and joined a CCA. There is this guy who insists he fell in love with me after I met him once at the CCA, and has been chasing me until now, which is like 2 semesters liao. He insists on paying for my meals and movie tickets whenever I go out with him, and because we don't have any common friends, I feel very uncomfortable going out with him alone. I made it clear from the start that I did not have any feelings for him, and he told me he knows and just wants to be friends. But would friends pay all the meals and movie tix and buy a birthday present over $100 for a girl who isn't even specially nice to them?
Then becuz I feel uncomfortable with going out with him alone, I will ask him to join my frenz or ask him to bring his frenz along. Then whenever I do that he will sulk or get angry (frustrated) and say things like, "I want to spend time alone with you" or "I don't have any friends. I only have you". But he told me he knew I didn't want to be more than friends wat... Then how do you explain his behavior?
I dunno I get these kind of cases a lot, when guys just think that if they go out with me they have to pay for every single thing I do. I mean maybe movie can la but plus every meal the guy so poor thing la... More so if they work for the money. Then if a guy wooing a girl doesn't pay for her stuff does that mean she will reject you? I wouldn't, but I don't noe about other girls. Just very curious about this.
And I donno whether this is common, but whenever I like a guy, when he likes me back, I realise I don't like him already. Why ah? I think I quite alone in that trait cuz normally is the other way around. (eg: U like someone then when you give up the person likes you.) I am wondering whether it has to do with my inability to commit or something. Maybe I don't like being tied down or pressured. Does anyone have similiar cases?
What a way to start the new year man... I hope everyone will enjoy their hols and new year and ang pows...
Cheers -
aiya. he want use money to teh you ma. use money to buy feelings. o well. sometimes it works, sometimes it doesnt. i suppose it doesnt work with you. so let him know lor. money cant buy your love, even if he spend $1m you also will not like him. ok a bit kua zhang.haha
just tell him say you treat him as friend or brother only lor.
clean cut say you like someone else le. confine to him =x he confirm get the message de. say like there is this guy...you saw him. he asked you out once. then blah blah. i no need teach you right? girls better at lying as compared to guys. haha =x -
dun suck him dry,he's already very pitiful
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dat guy is being stupid to begin with. can't fully blame the girl when later he starts complaining that she sucks him dryOriginally posted by beavan:dun suck him dry,he's already very pitiful -
tell him u les lor .... he's not ur type
anyway, girls like you are not common i think, cuz most gals will continue to be w the guy even when they dont like the guy, reason is becuz of the guy's $$$ ....
if you still wan to befriend with him, when you all go out, tell him u will pay for ur own stuffs . if he insists on payin, tell him this's the late date .
and .. becareful .. i think he quite despo 1
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which poly u in..?
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Hanor, hanor.Originally posted by rainee:dat guy is being stupid to begin with. can't fully blame the girl when later he starts complaining that she sucks him dry -
u are so lucky....Originally posted by theoneguru:This seemed like a very good place to get advice... So here goes...
I just went to Poly and joined a CCA. There is this guy who insists he fell in love with me after I met him once at the CCA, and has been chasing me until now, which is like 2 semesters liao. He insists on paying for my meals and movie tickets whenever I go out with him, and because we don't have any common friends, I feel very uncomfortable going out with him alone. I made it clear from the start that I did not have any feelings for him, and he told me he knows and just wants to be friends. But would friends pay all the meals and movie tix and buy a birthday present over $100 for a girl who isn't even specially nice to them?
Then becuz I feel uncomfortable with going out with him alone, I will ask him to join my frenz or ask him to bring his frenz along. Then whenever I do that he will sulk or get angry (frustrated) and say things like, "I want to spend time alone with you" or "I don't have any friends. I only have you". But he told me he knew I didn't want to be more than friends wat... Then how do you explain his behavior?
I dunno I get these kind of cases a lot, when guys just think that if they go out with me they have to pay for every single thing I do. I mean maybe movie can la but plus every meal the guy so poor thing la... More so if they work for the money. Then if a guy wooing a girl doesn't pay for her stuff does that mean she will reject you? I wouldn't, but I don't noe about other girls. Just very curious about this.
And I donno whether this is common, but whenever I like a guy, when he likes me back, I realise I don't like him already. Why ah? I think I quite alone in that trait cuz normally is the other way around. (eg: U like someone then when you give up the person likes you.) I am wondering whether it has to do with my inability to commit or something. Maybe I don't like being tied down or pressured. Does anyone have similiar cases?
What a way to start the new year man... I hope everyone will enjoy their hols and new year and ang pows...
envy ppl like u... i always the paying party & end up with nothin in the end
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Juz tell him if he insist paying everything for u then u wun go out with him again.
I always go dutch... I heart pain for his heart-earned money, espeecially if he's a student. But if he really wants to treat, I usually drag him to hawker centre or food court lor. -
Then becuz I feel uncomfortable with going out with him alone, I will ask him to join my frenz or ask him to bring his frenz along. Then whenever I do that he will sulk or get angry (frustrated) and say things like, "I want to spend time alone with you" or "I don't have any friends. I only have you". But he told me he knew I didn't want to be more than friends wat... Then how do you explain his behavior?
sounds like one of my friends... very possesive... just imagine IF u ever get together with him.... u'll definately get shut out from ur social life...gotta fully dedicate ur time to him... u've seen part of his true colors... its up to u whether u wanna continue hanging out with him....I dunno I get these kind of cases a lot, when guys just think that if they go out with me they have to pay for every single thing I do. I mean maybe movie can la but plus every meal the guy so poor thing la... More so if they work for the money. Then if a guy wooing a girl doesn't pay for her stuff does that mean she will reject you? I wouldn't, but I don't noe about other girls. Just very curious about this.
I guess it's gentlemanly to do so.... as for me.. sometimes friends(of which some are guys) treat me.. sometimes i treat them back.. its a give and take thing.. its not even about woo-ing at all.... But of course.. if a guy's trying to get into the good shoes of a girl... he would be most willing to part with his money... it's something called investment ya... who wants to be with a calculative and stingy guy?? But not paying for all her stuffz.. doesn't mean the gal will reject him... not every gal is that materialistic after all....And I donno whether this is common, but whenever I like a guy, when he likes me back, I realise I don't like him already. Why ah? I think I quite alone in that trait cuz normally is the other way around. (eg: U like someone then when you give up the person likes you.) I am wondering whether it has to do with my inability to commit or something.
Flickle minded?
Or do you like "unreachable" stuffs.. challenges.. things/people that come to easily will be the least cherished?Maybe I don't like being tied down or pressured. Does anyone have similiar cases?
Maybe u haven't met ur MR Right yet..... if u really found him..i doubt committment will pose a huge problem to you... this is how i feel... not too sure about u..
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But all in all..... no matter how possesive the guy is.. he's still human.. and human has feelings.. if you don't like him, please don't mislead him.... it doesn't feel good to have ur hopes hanging high up there and crashing down like hell.... and for ur own goodness sake... what if he turns agressive upon knowing that he invested so much on you, yet u don't even reciprocate a bit??
Do think about it....
Just my 2 cents worth...