help me!!! am i a gay?? i dun wan to be 1,i wana be normal!
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i really am confuse whether there is any counsellour here,any1 noes.
i get to this site from yahoo sear,i search counselling in singapore.
so is there any??
there is once in primary6,its after psle.my friends were out playing basket ball(the teacher is out too,supervising them)
i was in the classroom with 1 of my male friends,the teacher dunno it.
he was playing gameboy,i sit on a chair in front of him.then i dunno wat the hell is in my mind,i put my hands on his thighs and he didnt do anything,i then move into his pants (he acts like he dosent noe it) then i feel his cock,(i feel the shape of it)feeling curios,i ask him do u noe wat i am doing?? he said yes,i then ask him,do u like the feeling and he said yes contineu like this.This set me further,i stand behind him while he is still sitting at the chair,i pull his pants and sees his butt,then i put my hand and feel it,he then said hey wait wait,ok ok(i think he didnt notice i was touching his bare butt,he thinks i was touching his butt with his underwear(maybe).
then i told him to go toilets,and he agrees.we both see each other in underwear,i wanted to strip his underwear and he reject,then we just feel each other's private part and went out of the toilets.i wanted to touch his,but when he says he wantwd to touch mine as to fair i rejected,bt i don wan him to refuse me touching his,so i let him touch my cock by letting his hands into my pockets.i remember this so clearly because its been haunting my mind!!!
i feel dirty,i wana be clean!
i feel sad after tat...
any1 can clear the dirtiness in my mind???
counselor pls help me -
Well..... erm... hmmm... mmmmm.... *thinks* -
1stly, u have to update your thinking. There is no such thing as normal. If u're gay, u're gay. The more u deny it, the more unhappy u will be. Accept who u are and be who u are. That is the most important thing in life.
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is this site cramps of ppl or just sit around smacking flys??
jus wanted to noe whether this site popular ornt
so any counselour 2 help me
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There are no full time counsellor sitting by their comp and typing out aunt agony replies to everyone.Originally posted by lance_bi:is this site cramps of ppl or just sit around smacking flys??
jus wanted to noe whether this site popular ornt
so any counselour 2 help me
All here are working personnels, or people with life and family to take care off.
cannot wait?
Want quick solutions or fast food style advice? Go to this link http://www.sgforums.com/?action=forum_display&forum_id=12 -
u tok as thou we owe u a reply....Originally posted by lance_bi:is this site cramps of ppl or just sit around smacking flys??
jus wanted to noe whether this site popular ornt
so any counselour 2 help me 
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noo u gt me wrong,i am jus desperate 4 helps
feeling seperate into pieces -
well the best and most honest advice anyone can give is that, if u are gay, there is no use trying to be straight. And there is no such thing as being normal. If u are here hoping people will talk u into believing you are straight, it won't happen. Because to force or deceive a gay person into thinking he or she is straight is reall just not normal.Originally posted by lance_bi:noo u gt me wrong,i am jus desperate 4 helps
feeling seperate into pieces -
Firstly, how old are you now?
Second, after that incident, how many times have you done or thought of such things again, when was the last time you did it, and how's the frequency.
Thirdly, what's your sexual tendency now?
We need to know a bit more lah...
If you want general advice, I think most of us here can help you out bits by bits, but if you REALLY need to seek professional help, please do not to waste your own time by asking help from here when you should be talking to those professionals instead. -
lance_bi: did u enjoy touching him? were you aroused by him? how long have it been since that pri6 incident? Were there any repeats? Do you have a history of being aroused by both guys and girls, or just a history of being aroused by guys only?
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Originally posted by geodome:lance_bi: did u enjoy touching him? were you aroused by him? how long have it been since that pri6 incident? Were there any repeats? Do you have a history of being aroused by both guys and girls, or just a history of being aroused by guys only?
sounds familiar eh?
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I think you should call one of the hotlines but through payphones in case they track you and conttac your parents
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The question u have to ask yourself, is that since the incident happened, do you still have gay thoughts, or that was just a one-of incident. If its the latter, then dont read too much into it, cos at that age, most people are still exploring with their sexuality and their identitiy, and it could be pretty confusing for some. Everyone has a past, and its important to move on. However, if you are still entertaining gay thoughts, as in attracting to males, then either u accept yourself for who you are, or change yourself to be more receptive in society. Its your life, and you and only you can make that decision
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it is ok to appreciate other guys but if you like to 'ice-cream' then you better seek treatment.
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lance_bi. How old are you?
Now first,Its good then you've taken the 1st step into identifying the problem, know that you've done the right thing.
Secondly, some people may find it offensive but what the heck. But I speak with the hope that it gets to you. Homosexuality is a disease. Pretty much like a cancer growth in the body. Now nobody who is `nursing` a cancer, will say "Its my little teddy Bear, leave my cancer alone. I'll fight for a right. To erhm leave my cancer alone." Which is why I said you've taken the bravest step into pointing out the problem yourself.
Now as much as people hate cancer, so do i not condone homosexuality. Note, its not the person i'm against, but the problem. Cut off this disease at its root, like the chinese saying goes, Cut grass muz do away with the root, else it'll sprout again.
That will be my advise for now, till I hear from you again -
lance_han?
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oopos, thought this was bar
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yeah dat is important...........if after dat incident u do nt tink of such stuff anymroe den i tink ish okay....however if u keep tinking of similar stuff ever since after dat incident den something muz be wrong....dun sit dere n wait fer replies from us, GO GET PROFESSIONAL HELP!!!!(dat is if u feel v bad n guilty abt it)Originally posted by geodome:lance_bi: did u enjoy touching him? were you aroused by him? how long have it been since that pri6 incident? Were there any repeats? Do you have a history of being aroused by both guys and girls, or just a history of being aroused by guys only?
anyway regarding the straight and gay thing.....dun worry if u find dat afterall u r a gay.....dere r many avenues for u to seek help if u sincerely do nt wan to be a gay n wan to be straight.....
homosexuality is still a sensitive thing in singapore......a lot of pple still cant open demselves to the idea dat dere r ACTUALLY gays n lesbian around in today's society....u cant blame dem afterall, especially the older generation....my mum was toking to me abt bringing gals home fer her to see n BGR issues....ya so i joked abt bringing guys home instead...but she gave me such a cold stare dat i knew she cannot accept it IF i was a gay.....hahaha thank god i am not......
so dun worry i tink lots of pple out dere r facing similar problems..... cheer up!!! -
not bad what , gay can s h i t faster...
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excuse me, are u out to make life miserable for him? Homosexuality is NOT a disease. Which isolated village did u come out from?Originally posted by SajNT:lance_bi. How old are you?
Now first,Its good then you've taken the 1st step into identifying the problem, know that you've done the right thing.
Secondly, some people may find it offensive but what the heck. But I speak with the hope that it gets to you. Homosexuality is a disease. Pretty much like a cancer growth in the body. Now nobody who is `nursing` a cancer, will say "Its my little teddy Bear, leave my cancer alone. I'll fight for a right. To erhm leave my cancer alone." Which is why I said you've taken the bravest step into pointing out the problem yourself.
Now as much as people hate cancer, so do i not condone homosexuality. Note, its not the person i'm against, but the problem. Cut off this disease at its root, like the chinese saying goes, Cut grass muz do away with the root, else it'll sprout again.
That will be my advise for now, till I hear from you again
Honestly, there is nothing worse than to mislead the thread starter under the pretext of "helping him" in order to further your own bigoted agendas. U want to send the poor guy into a lifetime of painful denial is it? -
I think this is one of the biggest misconceptions people have. If u are gay, u can sincerely "don't want to be gay" but at the end of the day u know what? U can try to be straight but u will just be living a lie. U're not who u are. The most important thing in life is always to be true to yourself, to who u are inside. If u're gay, the worst thing u could choose to do is to "try" and be straight. That is called denial, and its not only potentially psychologically harmful to one's well-being, it also opens up lots of scenarios for potential future hurt.Originally posted by hiphop2009:anyway regarding the straight and gay thing.....dun worry if u find dat afterall u r a gay.....dere r many avenues for u to seek help if u sincerely do nt wan to be a gay n wan to be straight.....
For eg:
a gay guy marries a woman in an effort to convince himself he is "straight". Say 5 years down the road, he has a kid. He likes the woman he is married to, but he doesn't love her. And then he meets a guy he really loves, and start a extra-marital affair with him. Think how devistating it will be for the wife to find out her husband has been closet gay all along. How bad it will be for the children. Especially since there is less incentive for him to stay faithful to her, since he dosen't like woman. All that hurt and pain not only for him, but for his wife, his children, his family, his wife's family, everybody. How cheap he feels everynight when he has to sleep with her in an attempt to be straight, the self loathing he ends up feeling for himself, hating himself for being "not normal", the disgust that floods inside him everytime he has sex with his wife just to try to convince himself he is "straight". And in the end he strays just because nobody can hide who they are forever. U can lie to yourself but the truth always comes out. And if u've been trying to hide it, it will only cause more damage when it finally sees the light of the day.
So u see, this is how denial can ruin lives, not just your own, but whoever u choose to cast in your own little "straight family" act. My advice is, we have enough of this sort of tragedy and sorrow in the world. And we don't need children from this sort of homes coming out hating gay people and spreading bigotry. So be wise, accept yourself for who u are, and don't listen to the other bigots if they try to tell u its "not normal" to be gay or that its a "disease" to be gay. If u ask me, bigotry is a much bigger social disease than being gay will every be. They're the ones who need to speak to counsellors. -
Good news, you're not gay yet...cos gay people will never feel ashamed of their gayness. But I'm very sure that you're not gay and won't even make it as an apprentice-gay even if you went to take the gay test and licence.Originally posted by lance_bi:
i really am confuse whether there is any counsellour here,any1 noes.
i get to this site from yahoo sear,i search counselling in singapore.
so is there any??
there is once in primary6,its after psle.my friends were out playing basket ball(the teacher is out too,supervising them)
i was in the classroom with 1 of my male friends,the teacher dunno it.
he was playing gameboy,i sit on a chair in front of him.then i dunno wat the hell is in my mind,i put my hands on his thighs and he didnt do anything,i then move into his pants (he acts like he dosent noe it) then i feel his cock,(i feel the shape of it)feeling curios,i ask him do u noe wat i am doing?? he said yes,i then ask him,do u like the feeling and he said yes contineu like this.This set me further,i stand behind him while he is still sitting at the chair,i pull his pants and sees his butt,then i put my hand and feel it,he then said hey wait wait,ok ok(i think he didnt notice i was touching his bare butt,he thinks i was touching his butt with his underwear(maybe).
then i told him to go toilets,and he agrees.we both see each other in underwear,i wanted to strip his underwear and he reject,then we just feel each other's private part and went out of the toilets.i wanted to touch his,but when he says he wantwd to touch mine as to fair i rejected,bt i don wan him to refuse me touching his,so i let him touch my cock by letting his hands into my pockets.i remember this so clearly because its been haunting my mind!!!
i feel dirty,i wana be clean!
i feel sad after tat...
any1 can clear the dirtiness in my mind???
counselor pls help me
And thanks for your descriptive honesty here, as it will help you to think less often of it in your mind once you've typed it all out here. So feel better of yourself, you're doing a good job in helping yourself.
As the usual sayings would go by advising you to hang out more often with your friends and get to know girls and such, but both of us know that this isn't going to work. So I'm going to give it to you straight and hard here ok?
In order for your to go straight again and love girls and be able to face guys without feeling awkward, here's what I think you should do first before going out and hanging out with both guys and girls. I advise you to watch a lot of lesbian pornography (No guys) and until you feel the desire to masturbate to those girls. Surfing pornography on the internet should helps too if you're bored and getting not enough response from those lesbian pornography (Bad film maybe?). You must make sure that you have the desire to masturbate towards girls...in whatever form of media that you responded to...and masturbate. Repeat this therapy for a week and you'll be a fine and straight guy again.
As the trauma, bad memories...well, there isn't a way for you to erase them off your brain cells. And you have to live with it for as long as you live...your soul will remembers it. But there is a way for you to temporarily erase it from your mind...remember that it is only temporarily and you gotta do this everything it came back to you and as time goes by, it won't come back that frequent to you.
Well, you gotta find a quiet time to do so for first timers. Firstly, close your eyes and think about that particular bad and shameful incident which you desperately want to forget about. Secondly, as soon as you felt bad and ashamed about it...immediately open your eyes and think of nothing. Think of nothing really means not thinking about anything nor having any thoughts or personal voice and outside noise interferring and disrupting you. So it is very important to find a quiet time to do this. Once you've done the secondly, you will know that you've temporarily erased it from your mind cos you won't think about it again until it comes back for you...and rest assured that it won't be soon.
Be particularly careful with this...as it can erase anything temporarily from your brain. So don't be thinking about any important stuffs and so on when you really have to use this method, cos there's no way anyone in this world can reverse this...not even me.
Oh...and I certainly would like to use this space here to inform all those who have taken a peek at this post including those self-proclaimed honorable-male-pricks who are going to be one of them. Come to Aunt Agony forum ONLY when you're having a real problem or you genuinely want to offer advice to the people here. It's not easy for anyone to come here and pour out their real problems here even though having the benefits of being anonymous. So keep your silly, useless, self-arrogant, egotistical, pathetic, disgraceful attitude and one-liner to yourself and your own real life peers if you dare. I'm particularly disappointed by the number of people who comes in here to pick on, step on other people's wound and bad experience in order to give their selfish shell a good excuse to continue leeching oxygen from their own little forsaken world. Those people should be so ashamed for themselves and I'm sure if the people who brought them up knows about this, they will die from the disappointment that they've fed and raised. So good luck to them and their future problems as I won't have mercy on them. Maybe when their problems tored them apart (Not as cool and appealing as imagined), and when they're mentally left broken and helpless and spent...then they will realise that there is really such a thing called retribution. What goes around will definitely comes around and I can personally guarantee that.
By the way, all idiotic (unintelligent) post will still be ignored and my and are still free.
Good luck to lance_bi, hope you'll be a finer man when you've become straight. -
Hi, I am sure you are not a gay. cos you wrote that you dont want to be one. It's just a mistake that you make, most likely out of curiousity, just let go and live life as it is.
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Hi... My post is not as long as the others, but I'm sure you are nto a gay or lesbian. I'm presuming you are around sec.1 or sec.2 now... A lot of people at this age question their sexuality, but don't worry, usually it would pass. If until a few more years down the road, you still have that tendency.. well, accept it. But I agree with the above post, gays don't question whether they are gay or not. Honestly, in my class, there are some guys who openly umm, grab other boys' ....ummm... yeah.
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Perfect application here for me: "Do not debate with a fool, for others will not be able to tell the difference"Originally posted by HENG@:excuse me, are u out to make life miserable for him? Homosexuality is NOT a disease. Which isolated village did u come out from?
Honestly, there is nothing worse than to mislead the thread starter under the pretext of "helping him" in order to further your own bigoted agendas. U want to send the poor guy into a lifetime of painful denial is it?
lance_bi plenty of opinions here in abundance ; ) Plenty wants to help you out of it. But some in particular wants you as you are. Pick your choice wisely brother.
Shalom